by kathilipp | Feb 25, 2016 | Blog, Clutter Free |
Today God slapped me upside the head and then gave me a kiss on the cheek as only He can do…
I was “grumbling and complaining” because the list of household stuff that I need to get done is just huge and there is nothing I hate more than stripping sheets and remaking the bed, and the WHOLE thing needed to be done. Down to the dust ruffle.
So there I was, “grumbling and complaining” when He started giving me pictures of the ministry that happens in this place:
It’s where God provides rest for me more nights than not.
It’s where I fall asleep on the shoulder of the man He has given me to demonstrate His love in a tangible way.
It’s where I’ve loved my kids, read His word, and recovered when I was sick.
This is going to sound silly, but I am now taking time to “dress” the bed.
Hanging the comforter to dry in the sun so it smells like only sun-dried cloth can. Fluffing the pillows, spraying the linens (and let’s be clear, by linens I’m talking Home Good specials, nothing fancy, but comfy), folding the quilts and making it as comfy as possible for me and my husband.
I ended up grateful to God for providing so richly, and valuing rest and connection so deeply.
And I prayed that when you laid your head down tonight, you would feel restored and cherished by the love of God.
A great way to keep each room in the house Clutter Free is with our 3 bag system. Get yours over at the Kathi Lipp store and declutter for a better night’s sleep.
by kathilipp | Feb 23, 2016 | Blog, Me, tips and ideas |
Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.
~ Psalm 90:12 (NIV)
I’ve never really paid attention to Leap Days in the past. Oh sure, I’ve watched the Amy Adam’s movie. And when I was eight, I fantasized about asking David Cassidy to marry me, and him not being able to say no. (Oh, and I would have taken Shaun, in a pinch. I wasn’t fussy.)
And when I was younger, and in a job I hated, I resented the extra day of work. Couldn’t we just leave February with 28 days and be done with it?
But now, I’m looking at this extra day as a bonus. Oh sure, work still needs to be done and errands run, but there is something inside of me that longs to do something different: to take this bonus day and refuse to let it march by.
In sixth grade, our teacher, Mrs. Lawrence, had us write letters to our future, eighteen-year-old selves. I was so surprised to get that letter from my parents. It was full of hope and excitement from eleven-year-old me, and it served as a reminder at eighteen, when I felt the weight of the world on my shoulders as I was making decisions about my future. I’d learned a lot, I had a lot of people in my life who loved me, and that I had a great capacity for hope.
So I’m going to recapture a little of that this Leap Day.
I’m going to send my future self a letter. My Leap Day 2020 (doesn’t that sound so futuristic, like we’ll all be flying around in cars that year?) self.
This will not be a list of goals that I should have accomplished, but a list of things that I’m learning. My hopes and my dreams.
Things I’m planning on including:
- Bible verses that are meaningful to me this year.
- The way I feel about my relationship with Roger.
- Why I’m proud of my kids.
- My thoughts about how I’m growing as a person, and where I hope to be in 2020.
- Who I hope I’m growing into.
No – it’s not a list of goals, but it is some ideals that I want to become. I know, that just by writing them down, I have a much greater chance of seeing them realized than if I just keep them in my head.
I don’t know how this is going to turn out. It could be a colossal waste of time. Or it could just turn out to be something pretty fantastic.
If this is something you want to try, head on over to https://www.futureme.org/ and write yourself a letter. And perhaps let your kids write one too. How fun would that be?
Give your future self something to look forward to.
Speaking of giving yourself something to look forward to…
Have you gotten a ticket to an upcoming Finally Clutter Free event yet? I’ll be in Merced, CA this weekend and Modesto, CA on March 5.
Get more information and links to get your tickets here.
by kathilipp | Feb 22, 2016 | Podcast |
Have you had a dream that ended up falling apart? A vision for your future that never came to be?
“All of us end up with a life that doesn’t look quite like we imagined it would look. What do we do when we wake up someday and we’ve got this life we don’t recognize?” Michele Cushatt.
Today we talk with Michele Cushatt, author of Undone: A Story of Making Peace With an Unexpected Life and learn about a fabulous new community especially created for the Undone in all of us.
Listen to hear Michele’s amazing story and how you can be a part of her five week conversation today!
If you haven’t listened to our last interview with Michele, you can click here: Podcast #142 – Michele Cushatt – When Everything Comes Undone
A storyteller at heart, Michele Cushatt inspires audiences with the warmth of her transparency and presence. Her unique style makes you feel like you just spent an afternoon with a good friend, sparking tears one moment and laughter the next. Having experienced both the best and worst of life, she’s unafraid to disclose her imperfect spaces, so that you know you’re not alone in yours.
Pulling from her unique life experiences, Michele’s first book, a memoir titled Undone: A Story of Making Peace With An Unexpected Life, was released with Zondervan Publishers March 10, 2015. Her second book will follow closely behind, with a tentative release date in 2017. When she isn’t working on her books, Michele writes feature articles, blog posts, stories and devotional meditations for numerous publications including MOPS International, Today’s Christian Woman,InCourage, Fullfill Magazine, Hearts-at-Home, Upper Room, David C. Cook’s Quiet Hour, Standard Publishing’s Devotions, and multiple compilation books including five titles in the Chicken Soupseries.
by kathilipp | Feb 19, 2016 | Blog, Friday Favorites |
This article contains affiliate links.
Non-Obvious: How to Think Different, Curate Ideas, and Predict the Future
by Rohit Bhargava
If you are an idea person (and are fascinated with how people come up with ideas), you will love digging into this book. If you’ve been to one of my Finally Clutter Free events, you know that I talk a lot about living a “curated” life. And while that concept didn’t originate with this book, reading it helped me shape and define the practice.
Undone: a Story of Making Peace With an Unexpected Life
by Michele Cushatt
If you’ve ever known what it’s like to have a dream unravel, a hope or desire remain unfulfilled, regardless of how long and hard you’ve wished and prayed otherwise, then pull up a chair. You’re not alone. Beginning February 22, Michele is starting five weeks of “Undone Life Together,” unraveling the unexpected life, one question and conversation at a time.
Head on over to http://www.MicheleCushatt.com/ to sign up for this journey together.
Habit Stacking: 97 Small Life Changes That Take Five Minutes or Less
by S.J. Scott
I love this little book. Weighing in at less than 130 pages, this is a quick read that will introduce you to the concept of “habit stacking”: building habits on top of each other to create effective routines. I love it and refer back to it often.
Plenty: One Man, One Woman, and a Robust Year of Eating Locally
by Alisa Smith, J.B. Mackinnon
As much as I love fiction, give me a good memoir of people challenging themselves to be better any day. This is a lovely book about a couple who, while living in no-man’s-land, eat locally for a year. I enjoyed both of their writing styles, along with the creativity and ingenuity they employed to make a great life for themselves.
Creativity, Inc.: Overcoming the Unseen Forces That Stand in the Way of True Inspiration
by Ed Catmull and Amy Wallace
As you might guess, this was written by one of the founders of Pixar. I love the intentional ways that their team develops, well, teams and leads with excellence while still developing artists. If you want to get your creative juices flowing, this is the book you’ll want to read.
by kathilipp | Feb 18, 2016 | Blog, Clutter Free |
1. Get your bedroom clutter free
You knew I was going to say this, right?
You want to train your brain to associate your bedroom with rest, relaxation, and sleep – not work or household chores.
So not only do I want you to get rid of clutter in your room, but also the day to day chores that tend to pile up in there.
Put the laundry away. Take the work you brought home from the office back downstairs. Get the unpaid bills out of there. Clear out anything that has been stashed-and-dashed
Gather your decluttering supplies:
• 3 totes or boxes
• 2 bags (one for garbage, one for recycling)
• A timer
• (Optional) A chair or stool so you can work comfortably and reach what you need without moving.
Once you have your supplies, go through the Clutter Free steps:
Step One: Set up three boxes, a garbage bag and a recycle bag, and a timer. (You can use the one on your cell phone or your oven.) Mark one box as “Other Rooms” one as “Give Away” and one as “Put Back”. (Feel free to mark the bags, too!)
Step Two: Time Box by giving yourself 15 minutes on the timer.
Step Three: Space Box by picking one spot to clear out: a shelf, a drawer, a section of the counter. No more than you can realisticially pull out and put back in 15 minutes.
Step Four: Go through the area one item at a time, and use the three boxes to sort the contents.
Step Five: After 15 minutes, take 5 minutes to process your 3 boxes and 2 bags: take Other Room items to the other rooms, put Give Away items in the car for your next trip to the Goodwill, Put Back everything where it actually belongs in your bedroom, and stick the trash and recycling in their respective bins.
2. Calm Your Mind
We’ve all had nights where sleep is just a dream since our minds are pinging like a 1970’s pinball machine. Maybe you’re thinking of all you have to do – or all that you didn’t get done. Or maybe there is one special situation (usually one of the big four: Money, Marriage, Job or Kids) that is keeping you from getting the res that you need.
”A revved-up mind remains in a mild state of alertness even while you sleep, making you susceptible to nighttime awakenings,” says Michael Breus, PhD, author of Good Night: The Sleep Doctor’s 4-Week Program to Better Sleep and Better Health.
Find the time at night that is best for you to begin to calm your thoughts and:
• Read something light (non-electronic).
• Do some light stretching or go for a stroll.
• Write in your gratitude journal.
3. Avoid Bedtime Procrastination
Most of us are going to bed later than we want to (or our body needs to.) Maybe you get easily distracted by things that keep you from going to bed, or you are rushing to get those last few things done.
Researchers call this “bedtime procrastination.” Proactive ways to avoid it include:
• Setting a timer that turns off your electronics.
• Reminding yourself how doing one more thing can lead to another and derail you getting to sleep.
• Creating a before bed routine that takes exactly X number of minutes. Be sure to start it early enough so you have a little cushion.
4. Reduce Electronics
Cell phones and tablets are becoming more popular in the bedroom than television.
Dr. Breus cautions, “the light from electronic screens can trick your body into thinking it’s daytime and stop it from producing melatonin, the hormone that helps regulate sleep. News articles and games can also keep your mind very active, making it difficult to relax and fall asleep.”
To get a healthy night of sleep, instead of just “junk sleep”
• Experiment one or more evenings with no technology related electronics in your room and see if you sleep better.
• Turn off all TV’s, tablets and electronics one hour before bedtime.
• If you keep your phone in your room, move it away from your bed and place it facedown so it won’t light up your room.
5. Reflect on the trustworthiness of God
Do you find your mind becomes anxious when you think that you have to be in control of a situation? Has that ever kept you awake at night?
You can remind yourself that you God is trustworthy. Remind yourself that He is ultimately in control, not you.
• Put reminders on your phone throughout the day to remind you that you can trust God.
• If you find yourself awake during the night, you can remind yourself this by saying or thinking “God is trustworthy.
• Memorize and meditate on a Bible verse that reminds you that you can trust God. A few to start with:
Sleep doesn’t need to be the enemy. Learn to love sleep again by being intentional about respecting your mind and your body.
Want to learn more about living Clutter Free to not only sleep better but to live better? Check out Kathi’s Finally Clutter Free event calendar and get a ticket to an upcoming event. Or book one for your area. We have everything you need to create a great event that will bless the socks off the women in your community.
Learn More…
by kathilipp | Feb 16, 2016 | Clutter Free, Podcast |
GOOD sleep. Sometimes it can seem like a unicorn… you’ve heard that it exists but you’re pretty sure it’s all a fantasy. Getting a good night’s sleep is so important for your physical, emotional, mental and yes, even spiritual well being.
Kathi and Roger (yay, Roger is on the podcast for this episode!) were newly weds 10 years ago and had to learn how to sleep together. If you are married you know this can be an ongoing “room for improvement” area of a relationship. In this episode, they share their 5 best tips in getting a good night’s sleep based on scientific research, experience and experimentation.
Listen in, try out the tips and check back in with a comment on what tip worked best for you.
FREE DOWNLOAD
Start sleeping better by decluttering your room. The attached has several ideas specific to your bedroom that you can get rid of today to help you get started. Download here.
by kathilipp | Feb 15, 2016 | Guest Blog, Uncategorized |
Last year, just three weeks after her most recent (and most radical) surgery, Michele Cushatt and I hung out on her family room couch with friends Traci Sheer and Joy Groblebe, chatting about her newly-released book Undone: a Story of Making Peace with an Unexpected Life.
Today, I’m excited to share some of our convo and for Michele to tell you about her new Undone Life Together: a 5-Week Conversation about the Unexpected Life that begins February 22.
*****
Kathi: You and I have talked a lot about self grace. This is something you’ve really struggled with. When we first met, I thought, “That woman is harder on herself than anyone else I’ve ever known.”
Michele: You’re not the first person to tell me that.
Kathi: I’m not surprised.
Michele: I’ve pretty much heard that my entire life.
Kathi: Reading the chapter about your upset over the A- … if I’d come home from school with an A-, my parents would have thrown a party! But all you saw was the minus.
Michele: I only saw the minus. And isn’t this true about so many of us? We look at our lives and all we can see is the minus? We can’t see the “A”? That has been a theme in my life.
Kathi: I think a lot of people have pocket perfectionism. They’d be cool with an A-, but there’s other things they’d lose their mind over.
Michele: Not me. I’m pretty much across the board.
Kathi: So, speak to that. I feel like in the last couple of months, there’s been a lot more self grace. There’s been a shift.
Joy: You’ve had to ask for help. … I work with you every day. There’s stuff we’re doing that normally Michele would have handled, but she’s been handing over, saying, “Could you do this for me?”
Kathi: But her standards haven’t slipped.
Joy: Not at all! It’s still this high level of excellence. But it’s a reall sweet soft side of you. And I like watching God work in your life like that.
Traci: It’s what we get from you as your friends. You are very grace-full and very forgiving, and you see all of our As…
Joy: Always.
Kathi: Oohhhh…
Traci: …but you don’t see yours. So it’s nice to see you give some of that back to yourself.
Kathi: That’s good. Because she is the biggest cheerleader in the world.
Kathi: What’s been the transition?
Michele: I’ve landed in a circumstances that have given me lots of practice. Where I have no ability to control all the errant details of my life. So I have to let go at some point. And it forces me to see that not everything is my fault. Not everything is within my control; some of it is just life. Just life.
I have to find my value in somebody other than myself and my performance.
I have to find my sense of worth and value in something other than myself and my performance. For 43 years of my life, I had find my value in my ability to perform well. To produce children who behave and listen. To have a marriage that looks spotless. To do everything with excellence.
And I have learned that’s very shaky sand.
Ultimately, the only sense of value I can find that will not move, that is unshakable, is the love of God for me.
The only thing that I know I can wake up to tomorrow that will not be different than today is the fact that God will still love me. He will still know my name. And He will not leave. Romans 8:35, 37-29. It’s the only thing I can stand on that will not change.
I have no idea what my children will do tomorrow. I have no idea what kind of kids they’re going to grow up to be. I don’t even know if my husband will be here tomorrow; we never know these things. I don’t know how much I’ll be able to speak once everything is done.
The only thing I can stand on for sure, in cement, is the love of God for me.
And that allows me to first of all grace myself, because it’s not dependant on me any more. It’s not about me getting up and working really hard to talk well. It’s not about me reading a bunch of parenting books and being the best mom and winning some kind of parenting awared.
It’s about the fact that nothing is going to change the wide, high, long, deep love of God for me.
And somehow, that helps us make peace with our unexpected lives and undone selves.
Joy: Because that never gets undone.
Michele: Ever.
Who can change the mind of God?
His love for your is already established.
It will never change.
(You can view the entire conversation here: https://youtu.be/TBi3-0TLWpg … the portion shared above starts around 26:35 and runs through 34:55. Begin at 26:10 for a bit of fun banter!)
I’ve come to believe we can endure just about anything as long as we know we’re not alone.
Problem is, too often we feel alone. Utterly and completely.
In spite of the emails and messages and well-wishes, our crises isolate us, creating a divide too wide to bridge. It makes us feel “other,” separating us from those who seem to carry on unhindered in their ordinary, pain-free lives.
But here’s the thing: I think pain-free is a fantasy. I don’t know anyone who’s living the life they always imagined. I know more than a few people who are pretending to. But behind their well-crafted charade sits a schism of struggle they’re too afraid to expose. Thus we trudge on—both the pretenders and the strugglers—each of us swallowed up in our aloneness and fear.
But what if …
What if someone went first?
What if someone dared to create a safe place for the complicated questions and conversations?
And then, what if you and I could find a way to laugh and cry and be undone together?
I think there is.
That’s why Monday, February 22, I’m launching Undone Life Together: A 5-week Conversation About the Unexpected Life. Picture it like a giant family room with a bunch of fluffy pillows and chairs. There’s a seat for you there; me, too. And we’ll circle up and unpack the tough questions we bump against every single day. Only, this time we won’t do it alone. We’ll do it together.
When you join Undone Life Together, you’ll receive:
- A 5-week Daily Reading Plan through the chapters of Undone: A Story of Making Peace With An Unexpected Life. If you’ve already read it, no problem. You can revisit the chapter themes and engage in the conversation. Don’t want to read it? That’s okay, too.
- Daily emails designed to create conversation around your biggest questions.
- Dedicated Facebook group conversation around the days themes.
- Weekly videos where I dive a bit deeper into the most complicated topics.
We won’t come up with all the answers nor will we resolve all of life’s unknowns. But we’ll open the doors for an honest conversation. I believe, in the process, we will discover a God who is faithful, a peace that is unshakeable and a community of fellow strugglers who will walk with us in this Undone Life Together.
Like cold water in the driest of deserts, my friend.
It begins February 22 and ends March 25. Even better, it’s absolutely FREE. That means you can participate as much or as little as you like. You can even lurk in the background for the entire five weeks if that’s the most you can do. Believe me, I get it.
But you need to sign-up to join.
I can’t wait to get started. And, honestly, my heart is aching for you to join us. I may not know all the details of your story, but I know what it feels like to be alone, drowning in questions without answers. And I know the One who holds the key to staying afloat.
I’m so glad we’re in this together.
by kathilipp | Feb 12, 2016 | Uncategorized |
It happens to us all. The best of intentions have left you in love without a gift for your Valentine. Don’t worry! I’ve got some ideas that are sure to let your man know he is loved this Valentine’s Day. Ready? Set? Go!
1) Post It Note.
On the notes write things that you love about your man and reasons you respect him. Place the Post It Notes on the mirror in the shape of a heart. Bonus points if you put lipstick on and kiss the mirror. http://www.kathilipp.com/2013/02/the-husband-project-day-4-post-it-notes-mans-greatest-invention-leave-a-word-of-encouragement/
2) Breakfast in Bed.
Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday and for most people that means a little bit of extra time in the morning. Start the day off right by serving your man breakfast in bed. This doesn’t have to be fancy! Put on an apron (and nothing else) and serve him eggs, toast, juice and fruit in bed. He will feel like a king!
3) Fondue and a Movie.
Pull up Netflix ahead of time and pick out a few options that you might enjoy together. Rummage for chocolate, melt it down and enjoy fondue on the fly! Here are two simple recipes! http://tinyurl.com/zgl79we http://tinyurl.com/h5sjph6
Dip fruit, cookies, Ritz crackers with peanut butter in the middle (refrigerate them before dipping!) or marshmallows.
4) Will You Be My Valentine?
Make a homemade valentine card complete with glitter and stickers which includes an invitation to meet you in the bedroom at a specific time in the afternoon. Make popcorn and put on a movie for the kids and meet him for a rendezvous.
5) Set the Mood.
Make a playlist of songs that are meaningful to the two of you. Great dressed for a date and ask him to as well. Light some candles, set a pretty table and whip up an easy but fancy layered sundae or parfait. One bowl. Two spoons. As you share dessert reminisce about how your story began.
And why not give your man something to smile about throughout the year? My new book 101 Simple Ways to Show Your Husband You Love Him is now available. Emphasis on the word SIMPLE. Find out more here.
by kathilipp | Feb 11, 2016 | Blog, Clutter Free, Marriage, Me, Relationships |
Warning: February 14th can be a hard day for any woman not living inside the pages of a fiction novel or in an Anne Hathaway romcom.
We spend so much time here at Clutter Free talking about how to declutter your home, but we all know the truth:
Decluttering starts with our hearts and minds. When we can be focused and intentional about what emotions and thoughts we let in (and which ones we keep from taking up a chair and sitting down for a cup of coffee) it goes a long way to practicing peace.
And yes – emotions are at a high when bad things happen – a death, illness, financial trouble.
But I find that when the world tells us Valentine’s is “supposed” to be a great day — filled with flowers, poems, secret admirers, and declarations of undying love, well—that can set us up for disappointment in a way no crisis can.
This has been a struggle for me in the past.
- The friend who got 2 dozen roses delivered to work and my total haul was a card I got from a coworker.
- When I was going through my divorce and wondered if I would ever have someone to love me again.
- The time the guy I was dating broke up with me on February 13th. (True story.)
Following are five suggestions to help you begin de-cluttering your heart before Cupid’s arrow hits you between the eyes this Valentine’s Day.
1. Avoid the Comparison Trap – It’s easy to fall into the idea that Valentines’ Day “should” be a certain way. The best way to stop comparison is to disengage from social media, at least for this day. That way, you won’t be tempted to compare your situation with someone else.
2. Take the Air Out of the Holiday
Want a perfect recipe for disaster?
- Try to get a reservation on Valentine’s Day
- Pay a babysitter on Valentine’s Day
- Expect flowers on Valentine’s Day
Why not celebrate your love on a different day?
First, it lowers crazy expectations.
Second, it’s easier to find someone to help you take care of the kiddos.
Finally, you can actually get a reservation somewhere if you want to go to dinner. (Or do like we do, try a great, but cheap ethnic food place for Adventure Dining. All the romance, but my guy doesn’t have to wear a tie!)
Go for fun instead of tradition and make the holiday your own.
3. Practice Peace – Valentine’s Day can be fun, romantic, and yummy (if there’s chocolate involved), but it can also be stressful. Did I get the right card? What time is dinner again? Too many things to juggle and your joy can get zapped. Practice being mindful that God is peace. And since He lives in you, you have peace.
4. Celebrate Life Everyday – We can hype the idea that we are celebrating the day of love. But really? Are we? Showing loved ones love does not have to be on Valentine’s Day. You can show love and appreciation everyday. Celebrate the beauty of everyday joy and love.
And on this Valentine’s, instead of waiting for others to show their love, go out and create some. Bring some candy to the janitor at your kid’s school, take a balloon to your next door neighbor who lives alone, and spend some extra time snuggling your dog.
Don’t wait to be adored. Go out and create loving moments.
5. Practice Being Happy for Others – Someone else is going to have a nicer dress, a cooler card, and the bigger flower arrangement. Be happy for them. This may be exactly what they needed after a really rough time in their marriage or in their life. Practice having an inner attitude of positive feelings and thoughts about others.
If this a holiday that can be hurtful, don’t be hard on yourself. It is for a lot of women I speak to. But, don’t let bitterness ruin your day. Think on these verses that can put your day in perspective.
If you need a boost and a confidence builder for your Clutter Free lifestyle, Kickstart to Clutter Free is the 
perfect way to get started. In just 14 days, Kathi gives you simple steps in getting rid of 500 things. We’ve been hearing from people all over the country that are having great success with the Kickstart eCourse. Find out more here.
by kathilipp | Feb 9, 2016 | Podcast |
Part 2— Showing love doesn’t have to be take a lot of time!
In fact, you can use simple ways to show your husband you love him and we are here to show you how.
Kathi’s new book 101 Simple Ways to Show Your Husband You Love Him is now available! In this podcast, she and Erin discuss the second five days of the 10 Days of Love for Your Man challenge. It’s the perfect time to refocus on your man as we celebrate Valentine’s Day. You’ll love the simplicity of the ideas as well as the impact they can have on your marriage.
We have a beautiful download that you can print out as a reminder of these great ideas. Let us know how your first 5 days go by posting in the comments!
FREE DOWNLOAD
Post this beautiful download where you can see it to remind you of the 10 Days of Love challenge.
Erin MacPherson lives in Austin, Texas with her husband Cameron, her sons Joey and Will and her daughter Kate. She is the author of “The Christian Mama’s Guide Series“, a staff writer for Dun & Bradstreet and a freelancer for publications like Thriving Family Magazine, MOPS MomSense, FamilyLife Magazine, Daily Guideposts and BEMag. She blogs about her life, her kids and her faith at ChristianMamasGuide.com.
