Kathi Lipp (00:10) 

Hey friends, welcome to clutter free Academy where our goal is to help you take small doable steps to live every day with less clutter and more life and I am here with the queen of decluttering Tonya Kubo and The queen of making things cute. I Tonya. I’m sorry. That does not feel fair like Okay, okay Yeah, you know, I I mean because if I had to choose one, I’m not gonna lie 

  

Tonya Kubo (00:30) 

It’s totally fair. It’s totally fair. I own it. I own my role. 

  

Kathi Lipp (00:39) 

Making things cute Feels like a bigger superpower But hey, we know why our people are here and they are here to be able to declutter But we’re gonna have some purpose with our declutter So it’s Tonya Kubo and Tenille Register and I I am going to start with the softest of softball questions for you Tenille how many kids do you have? 

  

Tenneil (01:04) 

Five? Not a small question for me. 

  

Kathi Lipp (01:05) 

Okay, Tonya. well, 

  

Tonya Kubo (01:09) 

was gonna say! 

  

Kathi Lipp (01:11) 

you know what? And here’s the thing, depending on who’s asking the question, it could mean two different things because people will ask Roger often how many kids he has and he says two. And it’s like, he goes, ? wait, no, I have four. And like, because blended families, right? So you have a blended family, I have a blended family. What are their ages, Tenille? 

  

Tonya Kubo (01:17) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi Lipp (01:35) 

That’s the hard question. 

  

Tenneil (01:36) 

They are 17 to 28, so in some ways we like to pretend we have none now. 

  

Kathi Lipp (01:42) 

Right, exactly. Okay, and Tonya, how many kids? Okay. Okay, so for the purposes of this, I’m calling it a teen and a tween. Does that feel accurate? Okay, good, good, good. Okay, because what we are talking about today is kids’ sentimental items. Tonya, you’ve been leading our Clutterfree Bible study, and how big of a deal are sentimental items in 

  

Tonya Kubo (01:46) 

Two, 10 and 15. 

  

It works for me. Totally feels accurate. 

  

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi Lipp (02:11) 

that Bible study. Yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (02:13) 

Huge, huge. 

  

mean, honestly, it’s because the emotions are so intertwined with the things. Like a candle is not just a candle. It’s a whole relationship. 

  

Kathi Lipp (02:24) 

Right. 

  

Yeah. Can I tell you the most interesting thing that you guys know, I’ve been on the show, Dr. Nurse Mama, which is a nationally syndicated show. And they’ve had me come back in 2025 once a month to be on the program. And we were talking about Dr. Jessica’s, she has a stuff problem. Her husband does not have a stuff problem. 

  

Tonya Kubo (02:34) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi Lipp (02:52) 

but they have a stuff problem together. And she said, and we were talking about why it’s hard for her to let go of her adult kids stuff and her kids are still living there. She goes, when I see all of the stuff, it proves to me I was a good mom. And I’m like, that is deep, right? 

  

Tonya Kubo (02:54) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Mmm. 

  

That 

  

is deep and I’ve never heard anybody say that before. 

  

Kathi Lipp (03:19) 

It’s so honest though. If you can look at your kids’ trophies and you say, was there for every practice, or you see, let’s be honest, in my kids’ cases, their participation certificates, okay? Because we were not a trophy family, but we were a, you know what, we were behind the scenes, we did all the things. But you showed up for all of that. And I know that there are a lot of parents who don’t feel 

  

Tonya Kubo (03:21) 

Yeah. 

  

Mm-hmm. 

  

Hahaha! 

  

Kathi Lipp (03:46) 

super confident in their parenting because what works for one kid doesn’t work for another. But you can say, hey, look at this. I really tried. I really tried. And when Roger and I got married and we moved in together, we realized we both had a kid stuff problem because, you know, he wanted to be a good dad. I wanted to be a good mom. And I was drowning in all of the stuff. 

  

Tonya Kubo (03:51) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi Lipp (04:14) 

And Tenille, I don’t know if this resonates with you at all, but I didn’t feel like I could get rid of any of my stepkids stuff. Like I would just, I would be a wicked stepmom. That like would be the official sticker that would be on my shirt. Does that resonate? 

  

Tenneil (04:31) 

Absolutely. Not only can you not get rid of it, but you probably didn’t form their thinking about stuff. And so like with my bio kid, we had these like little seasonal habits of decluttering some things and reviewing the wardrobe and I didn’t have that process. And so that means their stuff just like stays forever even after it doesn’t fit or how do I establish that with them? 

  

Kathi Lipp (04:38) 

Yeah. 

  

Right. 

  

Right and I remember going through stuff and trying to have conversations and I’m like Roger I just need you to be the bio parent we we had two different roles We had the bio parent or the parent in charge So like if I left the house, I would say hey Kimber Roger’s the parent in charge if you need something talk to him 

  

And then bioparent, when it was emotional stuff, when it was the slamming the doors, I hate my life, that went to the bioparent. And Tonya, you are past the macaroni necklace stage, but you’re in the teen stage that brings a different kind of sentimental chaos. What are your kids bringing into the house right now? 

  

Tonya Kubo (05:39) 

Well, part of our challenge is different kids, different personalities. So for Lily, Lily has very few items, but everything she has is very, very precious. So the few things she has, she values a lot. Abby has a lot of stuff that is precious. And Abby is in an art phase. So I’ve got canvases and paintings and quite honestly paint everywhere in my house. 

  

Kathi Lipp (05:43) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Okay, now. 

  

This 

  

Okay. 

  

you 

  

Tonya Kubo (06:09) 

and she wants it all displayed and she you know she wants to visit her artwork that she has given me regularly. It’s a thing. 

  

Kathi Lipp (06:20) 

Can we just say Abby is an intense human being? Yes. 

  

Tonya Kubo (06:24) 

She is, and she 

  

is, she’s a big personality and she has so much joy. And also there is just a lot that goes on with the whirlwind that she is. 

  

Kathi Lipp (06:28) 

guess. 

  

Yes. Okay. So I’m going to tell you guys one thing that helped me, but then I want to hear a lot of your different ideas. And when it, when we blended our families and we had this overabundance of stuff and we had, we had a lot of cardboard boxes, like the bankers boxes of art and stuff. And it wasn’t precious enough to be in their room, but it was too precious to get rid of. And so. 

  

Tonya Kubo (06:51) 

Mm. 

  

you 

  

Kathi Lipp (07:04) 

I finally, we lived in a 1300 square foot townhouse. There was not enough room for that much precious. So finally I got it down, we did a one tub rule. Now I started this earlier with my kids where we had a tub and of course kindergarten, everything that came home was, this, I’m gonna frame this, we’re going to have a gallery wall. Everything was precious. And then you get to about fourth grade and you’re like, why do they send all this stuff home? 

  

And it’s like, because the teachers don’t want that stuff. I get it. I get it now. I feel deeply for teacher. Tenneil’s a teacher. She gets it. 

  

Tenneil (07:36) 

you 

  

They’re proving they’re good teacher just like we’re proving we’re a good mom. 

  

Kathi Lipp (07:43) 

That’s 

  

right. my goodness. You are so correct the more stuff that comes home the more of a good teacher thing that’s deep insight. I love that Deep insight so we did a one-tub rule like we’ll keep one tub in the garage But then you have to decide what is precious and what is not precious And then we also had to have the when they move out. We finally Tonya knows this story 

  

Tonya Kubo (07:48) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Deep, deep. 

  

Kathi Lipp (08:12) 

I think it was July 30th one year. I said, if your stuff is not out of our garage, and by the way, we gave them like six weeks, but if you’re, they were in there, they were firmly in their twenties, not living at our house. And so Jeremy showed up at our house at 1130, the day of to get what he wanted. And I’m like, guys, I’ll, 

  

Tonya Kubo (08:21) 

And how old were they, Kathi? You have to include their ages. 

  

Tenneil (08:35) 

haha 

  

Kathi Lipp (08:37) 

This is the last time I’ll be happy to throw things away for you. I’ll be happy to recycle all those, but I cannot deal with this stuff anymore unless you want to start paying rent for your stuff. Well, that cleared it up real fast. So that one tub was super helpful. Tonya, how do you keep track of what is Abby’s and what is Lily’s? 

  

Tonya Kubo (08:51) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

So I have a rainbow organizer and they get assigned colors. So there’s the drawers and I know, you know, this pink drawer is for Abby and the blue drawer is for Lily. And like, I love the one tub rule. That’s a good one. What we started early on is because when Lily was in kindergarten, because you’re right, it’s like, that’s when the stuff starts really coming in. In preschool, we didn’t get stuff all the time. 

  

Kathi Lipp (09:06) 

Mmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (09:28) 

They would just give us like a packet during conference. And by the way, parent teacher conference for a three year old. That just blew my mind. I was not prepared for that. 

  

Kathi Lipp (09:30) 

Hmm. 

  

There are lots of parents who they live or die by that conference. 

  

Tonya Kubo (09:41) 

Right, so we would have a conference twice a year. They would hand me a stack of stuff. So that felt very easy to manage compared to kindergarten when it’s all coming home every Friday. And at that time, the house we lived in, I just had a drawer for Lily in the laundry room and I would just shove everything in the drawer and then once a month go through it and decide what to keep. 

  

Kathi Lipp (10:00) 

Okay. 

  

Nice. Yeah. I think that one of the things that we have to figure out is curation with our kids, right? Because they get to determine what is important, what is it. Tenille, do you have any tips for that? 

  

Tonya Kubo (10:10) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tenneil (10:18) 

Yes, I love the one tub kind of sets you up for that mindset. And I remember to Tonya that big packet from preschool appreciating it. And I would say, what is your favorite one and why, and then pick that one to hold on to. So I started with my bio kid at a very young age saying like, let’s pick our favorite thing that we want to remember and then have something really special that happens with that one. 

  

Tonya Kubo (10:26) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tenneil (10:46) 

So you’ve probably seen online like having a frame on the wall for each kid and you can rotate which one’s up front. As my number of kids multiplied, the idea of going over and changing the photo on the wall like was not happening, right? And so what I did is I put up, if you picture like a laundry rope, right? Like you were getting your clothes out to dry with little clips there. 

  

Tonya Kubo (11:10) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tenneil (11:14) 

and then they could switch out their art on their little segment. And for those who really loved art, they had one of those in their room that they could be in charge. And then I had one in the hallway that I could put their little prize picture on. So that was a great one for us. And then as we got into the digital world, I started saying, like, hey, tell me about it. And I would just video record them with their art and their little story behind it. 

  

Kathi Lipp (11:15) 

Yeah. 

  

Tenneil (11:45) 

And then I have that to put on their graduation video instead of this big stack of stuff. So by the time we got to kid number five who’s graduating in May, I have one basket of school artifacts. That’s it. And I’m really excited about that because I inherited from my parents like a dozen boxes. They kept all of it and it created stress for me as an adult. how many objects from those boxes 

  

Tonya Kubo (11:57) 

Yeah. 

  

Kathi Lipp (12:00) 

Nice. 

  

Right. 

  

Tenneil (12:14) 

my five kids want. 

  

Kathi Lipp (12:16) 

How many? Yep, exactly. 

  

Tenneil (12:18) 

Zero, you guys. Zero. 

  

Tonya Kubo (12:20) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tenneil (12:20) 

There’s not one object from that box from all five kids that they’re interested in. 

  

Kathi Lipp (12:26) 

Yeah, it’s so true. You know, we have to understand these kids live lighter than the our generations before us. And, know, you mentioned the clothes line. One thing. So Kimberly’s first Christmas outfit, it was a little red and green checked dress and pantaloons. She’s never going to want that. You know, that’s not her thing. But what I did was I put it on a piece of rope with some clips and I pull that out every Christmas. 

  

Tonya Kubo (12:31) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi Lipp (12:55) 

and I use it as a decoration and I just love it and she has no interest but she’s like, yeah, I wore that. But for me, it was like, ? my god, my mom made it, it has a little bit, the whole thing. So I did wanna mention Tonya has a relationship with this company that produces school years memory kits. Tonya, can you just tell us a little bit about them? 

  

Tonya Kubo (13:00) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Yeah, well, it’s like perfect alignment with this one tub rule. And so the the owner, it’s owned by a husband and wife company, and they have an app that works for baby books. But what I love about the school year’s memory kit is it’s simple. It’s a box about and you can buy the box or not buy the box totally up to you. But it’s a box that’s about a foot wide, about 18 inches deep, and a little less than a foot tall. 

  

So just think it’s like one nice sized tub fits in most closets. And it comes with 11 by 14 file folders. And it’s one folder for each grade, preschool all the way up to 12th grade. And it’s printed on the outside. And this is what I love about it. I mean, it’s one of those things, you could totally DIY this yourself. I’m just not crafty like Tenille, so I have to buy the craftiness. 

  

But it’s printed so you can put their school, their teacher, and then what do they wanna be when they grow up? Who are their closest friends? What are they really good at? Paste a picture on the front, and then in that folder, you just put all the mementos from that school year. 

  

Kathi Lipp (14:29) 

I love it. And if you’ve been meaning to do something like that for seven years, buy the kit if you can. But if you can DIY it, that’s great. I know that Tenille would come up with cute fonts and everything. So we’ll have a link to that in our show notes. And we have a 10 % off because every little bit helps. love a mom and pop store. So the code is clutterfree10. And so we’ve got that for you. 

  

Tonya Kubo (14:45) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi Lipp (14:58) 

Guys, we’re gonna take a quick commercial break and then we’re gonna be back and we’re gonna talk about when it’s time to transfer ownership. I cannot wait. 

  

Okay guys, we are back. Okay, at some point some of this stuff needs to leave the house. Here’s the deal, if you, but here’s what I had to learn and it’s very hard for me. I’m not gonna lie. If you hand it over, it’s theirs and you no longer get a say about what they do with it. If they light it on fire, that’s okay because it’s theirs. I think that strikes people very differently. 

  

Because I do have a relative who tries to give me stuff and then checks up on it at my house. And I’m like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. If it’s important to you, please keep it. But if you’re giving it to me, I get to decide what happens to it. And that’s a really hard, I don’t know. It feels very guilt inducing. And so here’s my question. Tonya, have you talked about this at all with your kids about like, 

  

Tonya Kubo (15:59) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi Lipp (16:05) 

What will happen when they I I know you are it feels like a lifetime from now But have you had any conversations about what happens with their stuff? 

  

Tonya Kubo (16:09) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

like what happens with their stuff later? No, because I don’t know that they ever will leave, honestly. mean, like Lily would have her own apartment right now. She would, but it would just be like her and her bed and a cat and nothing else. She would just wear the same thing every day that she thrifted, right? Because she’s the big thrifty person. But all… 

  

Kathi Lipp (16:17) 

Yeah, when they move out. 

  

Ha 

  

You’re right. 

  

Right. Yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (16:39) 

ever really talk about is just like what do we have space for right now because those girls share a room. 

  

Kathi Lipp (16:43) 

Yeah, 

  

yeah, it’s so true. 

  

Tonya Kubo (16:47) 

So our 

  

big conversation in the house right now is books. It’s like going to Abby going, you’re 10, you’re reading chapter books. I think we can get rid of the picture books now. 

  

Kathi Lipp (16:57) 

Mm, yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (16:59) 

And I will give you a little tip on what we’re doing. And Kathi you know that this is big for me. Listeners know that this is big for me. I agreed to a yard sale. 

  

Because Abby is my collector, so we agreed to a yard sale and they get to split the money. Whatever we make, they’re gonna split it in half. And so Abby is very gung-ho about getting rid of those toys and the clothes and everything that she has outgrown. And we’re not having to fight about it. It’s beautiful. 

  

Kathi Lipp (17:13) 

Yeah. 

  

Okay? 

  

Yes! 

  

Ooh, 

  

ooh, could they still get like $1 if they give, if something’s given away for free? I’m just, thinking about you, Tonya. I’m thinking about you. 

  

Tonya Kubo (17:38) 

Right, 

  

well, so the thing is, is they get half of even the stuff we’re putting out for sale. Like I am done pretending, so I’ve lived in this house since 2018, I am done pretending I’m gonna put the stuff on the walls that was on the walls at the last house. I keep thinking it’s gonna happen, it’s not gonna happen. The stuff’s gonna go to a different home. So we’re getting rid of a bunch of home decor stuff and they get to keep that too. 

  

Kathi Lipp (17:43) 

Okay, okay. 

  

Yeah, yeah, it’s not gonna happen. 

  

Yeah. 

  

It makes the transition to adulthood so much easier if there’s not all that stuff. Tenille, how about in your house? How did that all work out for you? Or is it still? 

  

Tonya Kubo (18:06) 

Yeah. 

  

Tenneil (18:09) 

Yeah, so it’s something, 

  

I love that we’re having this conversation, right? Because it’s something you don’t think about when your kids are growing up until that first one’s gone and you kind of like need the space and you’re not sure how to handle it, right? And so for me, it was, I’m going to keep this one chest of things for you because I know that you live in transition in a small space. And so I will keep this one box for you. And then there was a separate category of stuff. That’s like a bigger like, 

  

Kathi Lipp (18:20) 

Right. Mm-hmm. 

  

Tenneil (18:39) 

heirloom piece of furniture, right? Like a really nice dresser, like I love it better than my dresser. Am I willing, how long am I willing to hold on to that one, right? So for me, the valuable things like that, I said, I will hold on to until you own your own home. And that’s undated, right? 25 or 45 until you own your own home. Because I don’t want to pressure them into settling down if they’re content with like a little bit more nomad. But all the 

  

Kathi Lipp (18:49) 

Hmm. 

  

Mm, okay. Yeah. 

  

Tenneil (19:09) 

stuff is like a one box rule and even that is like as they’re all getting older I need to adjust one more time and so I recently came across an idea and did it with my oldest daughter who’s not in her own home but she is in like she doesn’t own it but she’s there and she’s settling in and I did a kit for her house and I combined it with like new items that I knew she wanted to have right like some new kitchen linens and some things like that 

  

one or two pieces of childhood that I knew she could put directly like onto her wall or on her bathroom counter and she would want and I said she was so excited to have them and I said Everything else it’s out there. Do you want me to just get rid of it? And she was like absolutely Right. I did the think work for her and that’s what she needed. So I think you have to play it kid by kid, but I 

  

Kathi Lipp (19:57) 

good. 

  

Yeah. 

  

Right. 

  

Tenneil (20:05) 

I definitely think you setting the boundary of how much you’re willing to hold on to and then partnering with their personality to navigate it is really great. 

  

Kathi Lipp (20:15) 

Tonya, what were you going to say? Yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (20:17) 

Question so 

  

because this comes up in clutter free Academy a lot what happens if they never buy a home? 

  

Tenneil (20:26) 

Yeah, so for me at that point, I would say like, do you want me to sell it and you can have the money or are you giving it to me? Right? Because my daughter’s sister, she would give it to me. I would use that dresser, right? 

  

Tonya Kubo (20:35) 

Yeah! 

  

Kathi Lipp (20:38) 

Right? 

  

Tonya Kubo (20:39) 

curious, at what age? Cause like we’ve got members that I have been walking this path with and one of them, it’s like the kid is 40. And she was like, and I didn’t realize this for a long time. I thought we were talking about 20 somethings, but it’s like, okay, well, if at 40, they don’t live in a home that can accommodate the big China cabinet or whatever it is, I think we have to make peace with the fact that they may not. 

  

and come up with an alternative plan. 

  

Tenneil (21:10) 

And I should put a clarifier on it. Like this is only on furniture that I have a space and a use for in my home. This is a dresser that is in my guest room that she comes home to and it serves a purpose in our home. If that was in my living room or in my way or did not fit, then I, like Kathi, would put that expiration date on there. I might even offer like, you can pay for storage for it, right? Like I have a vehicle. 

  

Tonya Kubo (21:17) 

Mm-hmm. Mm. 

  

Mm-hmm. Yeah, okay. 

  

Kathi Lipp (21:37) 

Yeah. 

  

Tenneil (21:39) 

from my father that I pay storage on because someday I’m going to fix it up. That’s my choice, right? But nobody else is responsible for my hoarding that. 

  

Tonya Kubo (21:39) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi Lipp (21:48) 

Right. Okay. I love all this you guys and you know, we’re we’re coming to the end here. Tenille, I would love just a couple of creative ideas from you of things for our kids, whether they are littles or they are grown adults. But you know, those things that we don’t want to get rid of, but they don’t necessarily have a purpose is do you have a couple of ideas for us? 

  

Tenneil (22:17) 

I do. So one of them is the box of like little trinkets is to have like a glass jar, right? You have their like matchbox or you know, their favorite little makeup purse or these little things. Create a glass jar. It’s got your movie tickets and your concert tickets from high school and let that just be a decorative jar that you give them as a Christmas gift. And they have that in their house and you’ve gone through and 

  

Kathi Lipp (22:40) 

? 

  

Tenneil (22:44) 

you’ve decluttered it and you’ve got these little objects. So I think that’s a super fun one. And it’s something that when you walk by it and you kind of see your first little magic matchbox car or your little things, it’s kind of fun collected memory. Another one, I think another great one is to take that like first piece of artwork and have it put up onto a canvas. You can do that so inexpensively now, like just through Walgreens photo or whatever. 

  

Kathi Lipp (22:56) 

Yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (22:59) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi Lipp (22:59) 

I love that. 

  

Tenneil (23:12) 

for art for their apartment or their bathroom or something like that. I think that’s also like give a couple of meaningful pieces and let the rest. 

  

Kathi Lipp (23:15) 

Hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (23:20) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi Lipp (23:21) 

It’s so much about the presentation, isn’t it? The curation and presentation. I’m not giving you every Sunday school paper that you scribbled on, but I understand that this was an important time in your life. Like, you know, I kept the pictures of Thomas the Tank Engine that were so important to my son. 

  

Tonya Kubo (23:27) 

Yeah. 

  

Kathi Lipp (23:41) 

But the where he was scribbled on Jesus, we didn’t keep those necessarily. But it’s okay. He loves Jesus in his heart. And so I think just recognizing that curation makes things more precious. It makes them be things that we care about and that we love. And then we say, even if you don’t remember this, this was important to you. 

  

And here’s the story that goes with it. And I think that that is such a great encouragement. And it gives them context for their lives, which I absolutely love. So I’m just gonna encourage you listener, start small, one box, one folder, one school year. It’s not about getting it all done today. It’s about making intentional choices. Okay, hang out with us for just another moment. 

  

We have a new segment I’m so excited about Stuff that has earned a place in my house and I’m gonna share some really fun and exciting Things that you might want to consider bringing into your house as well 

 

SECOND AD BREAK HERE 

Kathi Lipp (00:01) 

Well, hey friends, welcome back and we are starting a new series here on the podcast, Clutterfree Academy. I tell you all the time to get stuff out of your home. 

  

Get it out, you don’t need it. You don’t need those birthday napkins from six years ago. You don’t need the Dora the Explorer backpack that you’ve been hanging on to for just the right child. But I wanna tell you some of the things that have earned a place in my home. And sometimes it’s gonna be something that I found at the store. Sometimes it’s gonna be a book and today it’s actually gonna be a Bible study. 

  

I am I’m just gonna admit it up front you guys. This is one of my friends I love her so much her name is Dorina Lazo Gilmore Young and She has a Bible study. It’s called Redeemer God’s Loving-Kindness in the Book of Ruth and Let me just tell you I’ve been obsessed with the book of Ruth ever since I started Like reading the Bible and so I am so excited to talk to her today Dorina welcome back to the podcast 

  

Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young (01:24) 

Thanks, Kathi. I always feel so welcome at your table. So thanks for inviting me. 

  

Kathi Lipp (01:27) 

Oh, 

  

thank you. Well, and we were just talking about you baking sourdough and I’m making soup and that’s how we’re getting through this winter and spring. And but you are also in, you know, as you spend your time lovingly watching your sourdough rise, you also have completed this book, Ruth. And I love what you say that sometimes Ruth is kind of put in a hallmark movie tinted lens. 

  

And so what do you mean by that? If somebody’s not familiar with the book of Ruth and the story of Ruth and Naomi, can you give us the reader’s digest version? 

  

Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young (02:08) 

Yeah, thanks for asking. Now, I just want to make clear that I do love my Hallmark movies and the predictability is something that is actually sometimes a balm to the soul. 

  

Kathi Lipp (02:12) 

? yes, there’s… Yeah. 

  

And Dorina, should say that 

  

we both work in some, we’re both contractors with Hallmark. So like we are not disparaging the Hallmark name. So please go ahead, yes. 

  

Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young (02:25) 

Yeah. 

  

Absolutely not. But when I say that the Book of Ruth is usually viewed through this kind of hallmark tinted lens, I say that because oftentimes people connect to this story with kind of a, you know, girl suffers hardship, girl overcomes the hardship, boy meets girl, they fall in love and then they live happily ever after. And what I have discovered through the Book of Ruth is that it is so much deeper than that. 

  

And it’s not just this predictable kind of like romance story. It’s actually a description for us of a real life situation that was messy and unexpected and colored by grief. And so just to kind of quickly summarize, asked, you know, 

  

Kathi Lipp (03:11) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young (03:18) 

What’s the Reader’s Digest version or, you know, I think about Cliff Notes. We used to use Cliff Notes, right? So what’s the quick way to kind of talk about the Book of Ruth? I would say what it starts with actually is tragedy. So Ruth is a woman who was married and her husband actually dies. In fact, her brother-in-law and her father-in-law also passed away. And so here we have Ruth. 

  

Naomi, her mother-in-law and her sister-in-law, Orpa, and they are in a dire situation where they are widows. They don’t have their providers. They don’t seem to have a way forward. And that’s where the book of Ruth starts. And then what we see is we see these women on this dusty road back to Bethlehem. And yes, we are supposed to recognize the name of that city. They are headed back to Naomi’s home where there’s a promise of provision. 

  

And when they go there, they find God’s provision, but in a very unexpected way through a landowner named Boaz. And that’s kind of the gist of the story. And I don’t want us to hurry past all of that richness just to get to the happily ever after. 

  

Kathi Lipp (04:24) 

Right. 

  

It you know, the happily ever after only comes after we recognize the pain in our lives. boy, you know, I didn’t really when you said that you had written this Bible study on Ruth and I thought, that’s so cool. I always love your takes on stuff. It didn’t occur to me later that this mirrors your own story so much. 

  

And you don’t have to be a widow to appreciate the depth of this story, but this does mirror some of your own experience, doesn’t it? 

  

Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young (05:16) 

Absolutely. This is a book that I was in love with for years before, like you said, since I fell in love with the Bible. You know, this has been a book that I’ve studied, that I’ve taught, that I’ve mulled over, but it completely changed when I was widowed 10 years ago. And here I was on the road to Bethlehem, so to speak, and trying to figure out what my life was. And God, the Redeemer met me on that dusty road. And so he used 

  

reading and studying of this book actually to bring the real life redemption that he had in store for me and for my daughters. 

  

Kathi Lipp (05:52) 

And you know, you think about this, the book of Ruth is really about God’s love for the disenfranchised, isn’t it? For the widow, for the orphan, for the immigrant, for the refugee and the poor. What in your perspective has changed since you did this Bible study? Has your perspective on any of… 

  

how we as Christians interact with widows or with orphans or with the poor. Has any of that changed for you through your lens of Ruth? 

  

Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young (06:34) 

You know, I definitely feel like going through the process of creating this study and then even, you know, we did video teaching. So teaching this study, writing it, editing all of it, it has deepened my understanding that we serve a God who cares about the vulnerable. And so that is really actually the invitation here. Part of it is for us to understand that God cares about us. 

  

in our unexpected circumstances, whether you’re a widow or not. But then part of it is an invitation for us to see that, hey, there are people all around us who are vulnerable, who are disenfranchised, who are grieving, that actually God the Redeemer calls us to reach out to, to feed, to come alongside. so for me, that’s where the story then became not just this description of what happened to this one woman, 

  

Kathi Lipp (07:04) 

Yeah. 

  

Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young (07:32) 

but also a call to all of us as believers. 

  

Kathi Lipp (07:37) 

You know, one of the things that I found so fascinating about this is that you’ve really incorporated some artistic elements into this study. There are visual arts and journaling prompts. And I just thought I would so love to do this with a group of women where we can be sharing those experiences and seeing into each other’s study and their history. 

  

because I think that that is something that sometimes we’re missing. I’ve been to Bible studies before where you are just filling in blanks and writing in answers. And that can be helpful, but it can be so much more. What caused you to take this really kind of multimedia approach to this Bible study? 

  

Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young (08:31) 

Well, you I wanted to do something that was a little bit more creative and recognizing that a lot of people have studied the Book of Ruth. It’s popular for women’s studies. And so I thought to myself, well, what’s something I could do that’s unique, that’s experiential, that invites people to go a little bit deeper? And so we incorporated things like Vizio Divina, which is original art pieces that were created for my Bible study. And then 

  

Kathi Lipp (08:40) 

Yeah, right. 

  

Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young (08:57) 

It allows people who are reading the study to look at that art piece, to be reflective, to pray, to contemplate, and then to enter in with the Holy Spirit to see, okay, well, what can I learn from this portion of scripture? And a lot of times, visual arts and different forms of art can help us to go there. And so that’s why I wanted to incorporate something a little bit different. I do believe in verse by verse exposition, and that’s there. 

  

But I do want people to own this in their heart, to have a takeaway that this is a book that not just knowledge is gained, but actually that their lives are changed. 

  

Kathi Lipp (09:39) 

I love it. What group of women do you feel like would most benefit from going through this study? Do you think it would be better, you know, one-on-one with just a couple of people, a large group or I know we think every Bible study is for everybody, is, you know, but I also feel I love this. And like I said, I would want to do it with a group of my friends, even if we were online together, but 

  

Who did you have in mind when you were creating this Bible study? I guess that’s the question. 

  

Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young (10:14) 

Well, I’ll be honest and say kind of that bullseye target is for women who are suffering or who are grieving. And I’m having the privilege of actually going through the study right now with a small group of widow moms. And it is so rich to just see how this ministers to them. But I do believe that it can appeal to different groups. And so that’s why I would really encourage people to think about whether it’s through online Zoom or even in person in someone’s living room. 

  

Kathi Lipp (10:41) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young (10:42) 

that you go through it with a small group where you can process some of those things. some of the reflection questions that I have for people also are to look around and to see who’s in your community, who’s in your church or your circle, your neighborhood, who really needs that ministry of presence. And I think if we do it in a small group, we can even brainstorm some of those things together. 

  

Kathi Lipp (10:59) 

Yeah. 

  

I love it. Yeah, because there’s a real practical element to all of this as well, which I absolutely love. Dorina, it is Redeemer, God’s loving kindness in the Book of Ruth. Guys, it’s available anywhere you love to buy books, but of course, we’ll have the link in there for you as well. And we’ll also have Dorina’s website so you can find out more about it. Thanks so much for being on with me today. 

  

Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young (11:30) 

Thanks for making my Bible study something that you keep in your home. 

  

Kathi Lipp (11:33) 

Yes, absolutely in a place of honor 

  

friend in a place of honor. Well friends you’ve been listening to the writing. ? no, you haven’t Well friends, you’ve been listening to the clutter free academy podcast. I’m Kathi Lipp now go create the clutter free life You’ve always wanted to live