In this episode of Clutter Free Academy, Kathi Lipp and Tonya Kubo talk about why they're moving from “No Buy July” to a gentler, grace-filled “Low Buy July.” If you’ve ever felt like buying toilet paper broke the rules or you’re just exhausted by all-or-nothing...
#673 – The Dishwasher Dilemma: Secrets to a Clutter-Free Kitchen
#673 – The Dishwasher Dilemma: Secrets to a Clutter-Free Kitchen
In this engaging episode of Clutter Free Academy, hosts Kathi Lipp and Tonya Kubo dive into the dynamic world of dishwashing, sharing secrets to establish a daily rhythm that keeps kitchen chaos at bay. Listen in as Kathi reveals her tried-and-true methods for optimizing dishwasher efficiency, maintaining the appliance, and involving the whole family in the process. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by piles of dirty dishes or uncertain about how to best utilize your dishwasher, this episode is your solution. Discover the power of routine and effective strategies to keep your kitchen environment serene and functional. Be sure to stick around after the dishwasher fun for a quick conversation with author Barb Roose about her new Bible study in the book of Matthew that focuses on prayer!
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Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest
Kathi Lipp gives readers an easy-to-follow process for meal planning and prep, so that they can enjoy a full day each week of real rest and refreshment.
Could you use a break from cooking (and everything else) once a week? Not only is rest vital for your mind and body, it’s good for your soul too. God designed us to enter into Sabbath rest one day per week, but as you know, meals still need to be made. Your family still needs to be fed.
Sabbath Soup includes convenient, seasonal meal plans that take the guesswork out of shopping and cooking. More than just a collection of delicious recipes—including main dishes, breads, breakfasts, desserts, salads, sides, and yes, soups—this is your guide to establishing a weekly rhythm and routine of meal planning and prep that allows you to have a true day off.
Do something good for your soul and experience the peace that comes with a full day dedicated to spending time with God, family, and friends. Savor your Sabbath as you proudly proclaim, “Soup’s on!”
Order your copy of Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest here.
Links Mentioned:
- Glisten Dishwasher Cleaner
- Anti-Limescale Magnaoball
- Wirecutter Dishwasher Episode
- Barb’s Book “Matthew: Pray Like This”
FYI: Some product links may be affiliate links. If you buy, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. Thanks for your support!
Clutter Free Resources:
Join our Clutter Free Academy Facebook Group
Order Sabbath Soup here
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Meet Our Co-Host
Tonya Kubo
Tonya Kubo is the illustrious and fearless leader of Kathi Lipp’s Clutter Free Academy Facebook group and the Clutter Free for Life membership program. A professional community strategist, she believes everyone deserves to have a place online where they feel like they belong. Raised by a hoarder, Tonya knows firsthand the pain and isolation that comes from living in conditions others don’t understand. She wants better for her family and her cluttery peeps, which is why she is passionate about the compassionate slow-and-steady approach that makes Clutter Free unique. She lives in the heart of California with her husband, Brian, their two spirited daughters, and one very tolerant cat. Visit tonyakubo.com to find out more about her community work, or email her at tonya@kathilipp.org to discuss the Clutter Free Academy podcast and programs.
Meet Our Guest
Barb Roose
Barb Roose is an established author, a speaker at national women’s conferences, and a regular contributor to (in)courage, Crosswalk, and iBelieve. She has written six Bible studies, including Matthew: Pray Like This, Surrendered: Letting God and Living Like Jesus, and Joshua: Winning the Worry Battle plus Finding Jesus in the Psalms and Three other books. She is the host of Bold, Brave & Beautiful podcast. Barb, also serves as a teaching pastor at her home church, CedarCreek Church, with more than 6,000 in weekly attendance. The proud mother of three adult kids, an Army Captain, preschool teacher and NICU Nurse, Barb loves reading and walking. Whenever possible, she prefers to eat dessert first. You can find what Barb is currently up to here.
Transcript
Kathi Lipp (00:08)
Well, hey friends, welcome to Clutter Free Academy where our goal is to help you take small doable steps every day to live with less clutter and more life. And I am here with my consummate co-host, is Tonya Kubo. Hey, Tonya. ? Now, I know you have four people living at your house. How are dishes for you guys?
Tonya Kubo (00:23)
Hey, Kathi
? like you would expect with four people living in my house, but at least we have a dishwasher. Not everybody does.
Kathi Lipp (00:37)
Right,
isn’t that it is such I I probably spent five years doing Dishes by hand and so I well, I hate doing dishes I am one of those people that is super super grateful for that dishwasher every single day I think part of my problem for so many years was not having a rhythm. It was like, okay, I would
Tonya Kubo (00:45)
Mm-hmm.
Kathi Lipp (01:03)
put off doing dishes as long as possible. I think one of things that I used to think deeply was I couldn’t run the dishwasher until every little bit of it was full. And that would mean, you if we went to bed and there were still spaces for a few glasses, I wouldn’t do the dishes and then we’d have breakfast dishes. And then it always felt like I was behind and I hated that feeling. ?
Tonya Kubo (01:06)
Mm-hmm.
Hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Kathi Lipp (01:31)
I can imagine, now who’s the chief dishwasher in your house?
Tonya Kubo (01:36)
So it has historically always been Brian, but we’ve been, you know, the girls are older. We try to split chores with them. So we had a beautiful system when it was just Brian. We had a pretty good system when it was Brian and Lily, but now it’s Brian, Lily and Abby doing different components. And I really feel like I know that we will be grateful for this later, but right now it just feels like too many cooks in the kitchen. And I mean that pun in every bit.
Kathi Lipp (01:47)
Mm-hmm.
Yes.
Yeah,
it’s painful. And I know a lot of people are like, well, it’s just easier to do it myself. It is easier now, agreed. And there will come a day when you’ll be really, really grateful that you raised competent adults who, even though they may not do things perfectly, know how to do them and know the expectation is them. So good job, mom. Good job, dad Brian. We love it. Okay, so today we want to cover setting
Tonya Kubo (02:11)
Mm-hmm.
Kathi Lipp (02:34)
of a daily dish rhythm, maintaining your dishwasher and getting optimal results because I, for years and years and years, I didn’t know that there was a way to maintain your dishwasher. I thought it was either working or not working. Those were the, you it was very binary. And I now know that there are some things that we can do to make it last longer and make it run more effectively. So I want to talk about that. I
Tonya Kubo (02:36)
Mm-hmm.
Kathi Lipp (03:02)
Our daily dish routine looks a little bit like this. We usually are unloading in the morning and then filling up during the day. And depending on whether I’m cooking or not, we want run it once or twice. Does that look very different from what you guys do?
Tonya Kubo (03:23)
No, I would say ? it’s about the same, but sometimes I would say probably two to three days a week, I’ve got to run it twice in a single day. Just, yeah, well, and there’s more humans here.
Kathi Lipp (03:31)
Yeah, yeah big cooking days. Yeah Yep,
absolutely. my goodness for sure. Yeah, anytime I’m cooking it’s going to be a you know, and sometimes I’m cook sometimes, you know, we have Leftovers from when I cook we have a lot more leftovers than most people because it’s just the two of us. So ? Those are don’t be tend to be heavy dish days, but I I think it’s really really important
to say, okay, dishes are just a part of life. We need to figure out a routine for them. And we need to make sure that everybody in the house is sticking to the ideal. It’s not the perfect, but ideal for what our house can actually do. So unless you are single and eating a lot of takeout, you’re probably going to be needing to do one load a day. ?
I think, for us, we never get away with not doing dishes in the day. That just is not how we run. And so if I just say, OK, dishes have to be there every single day. And then ? do you guys have any rules for people bringing dishes to the sink?
Tonya Kubo (04:35)
Mm-hmm.
Well, sure, doesn’t mean anybody follows them, Kathi, ?
Kathi Lipp (04:51)
Okay, sure, sure, sure, yes. I understand
that deeply too. What? Yeah.
Tonya Kubo (04:56)
Yeah, you know, it’s the teenager thing.
But for us, you’re supposed to bring, the rule is you bring your dish into the sink, you rinse it out and it goes on the left side. Once it’s rinsed out on the right side of the sink, it’s then put on the left side of the sink. I prefer the dishes to go into the sink. Brian prefers them to be on the counter next to the sink.
Kathi Lipp (05:11)
Mm-hmm.
? interesting. Okay. Yeah, I think next to the side of the sink would kill me.
Tonya Kubo (05:26)
Yep, yep, not gonna say you’re wrong there.
Kathi Lipp (05:26)
Yeah. Yeah.
You can always tell when a blood Lipp is living here, whether it’s Roger or one of his kids, because they put drinks unthrown out. Yeah, they don’t drain the cup. They put it next to the sink. And like, why? Why?
Tonya Kubo (05:37)
Yeah
Mm-hmm.
Kathi Lipp (05:52)
Why am I, why are you waiting for somebody else to dump out your Starbucks cup? I don’t understand that. You’re killing me. Now, one thing I have heard is, you know, some people like they load right after each meal or snack. That’s what we tend to do as well. But then I thought this was interesting. One of my friends says that she uses a small bin. I don’t know if it’s on the counter or if it’s
Tonya Kubo (05:58)
hahahaha
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Kathi Lipp (06:21)
suction to the inside of the sink where she puts cutlery ? until it’s ready to go into the dishwasher. So I find that fascinating as well. I don’t necessarily see the advantage, but I’ve heard of a couple of people who are doing that. So ? do you stay in the kitchen while Roger, ? Roger, I’ve now married you off to my husband. Hope that’s okay. ?
Tonya Kubo (06:27)
Mmm.
Yeah.
Brian might have a complaint or two, but you know.
Kathi Lipp (06:51)
You know, if you’re going to be married off, he might have a complaint, but
you know what? You know, if I if I have to give you something of mine, that’s not a bad deal. ? I tend to stay in the kitchen and put things away while Roger’s doing the dishes. Are you guys separate or are you like body doubling by working in there together?
Tonya Kubo (07:08)
Hmm.
Yeah, so Brian doesn’t want anybody in the kitchen when he’s in the kitchen. Absolutely not. He like, no, that’s not okay. But the girls and I will will tag team because I find for them they feel, you know, it feels like less of a chore if we’re all doing something together. Yeah.
Kathi Lipp (07:16)
? okay.
That’s how I feel too. Yeah, like it’s
not woe is me, here I am, know, Cinderella.
Tonya Kubo (07:34)
Yeah, but
like if you came over to my house and I was cooking dinner, I wouldn’t want you to help me cook dinner, but I would want you to sit at the table and chat with me while I cooked. Like that’s fun for me. But Brian is just like, ? I’m sure there’s another room in this house you can be in. And I’m like, okay.
Kathi Lipp (07:42)
That’s all I need. Yes. Yes.
Okay. Good to know, Brian. Okay.
Yeah. So Roger, like he loves to barbecue because people will come out and talk to him. But if somebody makes a suggestion on how to barbecue. No, not okay. ? Okay. Yeah. I love going to bed knowing the dishes are done. Like there’s a clean slate, we’re starting the day off well. And we do a delay setting on our dishwasher. So it’s running at
Tonya Kubo (07:59)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-mm.
Mmm, yeah.
Kathi Lipp (08:18)
like two in the morning because what that does is it’s not using energy during peak hours. So we’re delaying it by like, you know, four hours because we’re probably he’s probably putting the last things in at around 10 o’clock at night. And that seems to really, really help. ? I do believe as kids get older, a couple of different things. One,
Tonya Kubo (08:20)
oooo
you
Kathi Lipp (08:48)
I believe that everybody should at least be responsible for scraping off their plates. I don’t want to scrape off your food when you’re 17 years old.
Tonya Kubo (08:57)
Mm-hmm.
No, and honestly if your kids go to preschool they have to do it there.
Kathi Lipp (09:04)
Right exactly
You have you seen these videos of the japanese preschools? Where my goodness you guys if you haven’t seen it i’ll see if they’re first of all, they’re the cutest kids in the entire world and They are all scraping off their own thing. They’re all using cleaner to wipe down their tables. They’re they’re sweeping the floors i’m like ? Yeah, had I I wish I would have seen that earlier because I don’t think I believe that my kids were capable of that but now
Tonya Kubo (09:11)
Yes.
Those kids are so cute.
Kathi Lipp (09:34)
They are they were they they’ve always been okay guys We’re gonna take a quick break, and then I want to come back and talk about Maintaining your dishwasher just a couple of things you might not have thought about because I didn’t grow up this way So maybe you didn’t grow up this way. I used to always think I didn’t grow up this way I was the only one and I’ve come to find out it’s much more universal than that right So we’re gonna give you a couple of different things that you can think about
Tonya Kubo (09:57)
Yeah.
Kathi Lipp (10:03)
and we will be right back.
Okay, guys, we have talked about loading and unloading your dishwasher. I will say one other thing that has changed our dishwasher unloading, Tonya, is we got a kitchen island. You know, I don’t know, maybe six, eight months ago. Maybe it’s been longer than that. Well, yeah, anyway. And one thing I love about it is when we’re unloading the dishes, we can stack them there and then just go.
Tonya Kubo (10:17)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Kathi Lipp (10:36)
to where the dishes go, or go to where the plates are. I love it so, so much. ? Okay, but I wanna talk about maintaining your dishwasher. A couple of things to think about. One, ? a weekly quick clean. Now, I don’t necessarily do this weekly, but one thing I do is I peek in there at least once a week and just check the filter.
Tonya Kubo (10:54)
Mm-hmm.
Kathi Lipp (11:00)
Does around the filter start to look gunky? Is there paper on there from like a jar or something like that? So I will pull that out every once in a while. And then I’ll just kind of look at the seals around the door. I check it every week. I don’t clean it every week. I’m not going to clean something that doesn’t look dirty. Life is not that boring for me. But once I’ve done that, it makes me feel so much better about knowing that it’s going to run well.
Tonya Kubo (11:01)
Mmm.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah ?
Kathi Lipp (11:30)
? and then monthly couple of different things one we use ? finish in our our dishwasher just to You know, it’s that final rinse that is really really good in addition do you use anything like that?
Tonya Kubo (11:50)
No, no, we’ll use vinegar in the dishwasher every now and then. We have horrible hard water. And so a lot of times those ? rinse aids and cleaning agents actually just increase the mineral deposits.
Kathi Lipp (11:54)
Okay.
Uhhh, yeah.
Mmm, okay. Yeah, it just doesn’t work for you. Okay. Now I do want to talk about glisten Glisten is a dishwasher cleaner. So look I’m going to try to describe it for our listeners at home It’s just like a plastic bottle, but you take the lid off and it has a wax seal in the in there because you want this for the last cycle that heating cycle of your dishwasher
Tonya Kubo (12:09)
now
Mm-hmm.
Kathi Lipp (12:35)
So that wax melts in there and it’s perfectly safe for your dishwasher. But what it does is it gives a deep clean to your entire dishwasher. So I don’t know that I’ve ever talked about it on here. You’ll remember if I have because you have a much better memory than I do. But Roger and I have a tub that we call the once a month tub. And okay, so I’ve talked about it. These are things we want to do once a month in our house. So this is stuff like
Tonya Kubo (12:47)
Nice.
Mm-hmm.
Kathi Lipp (13:05)
cleaning, deep cleaning that dishwasher, changing out the baking soda in our refrigerator, Moose’s ? tick and flea treatment, water filters, because we have very healthy water, but terrible tasting water. So we put these, ? these glisten bottles, we buy them three at a time, we put them into that box. And when I’m down to the last one, I order some for the next month.
Tonya Kubo (13:27)
Mm-hmm.
Kathi Lipp (13:33)
And we just go around the house and we put our plant fertilizer. So it’s something that we want to do once a month or approximately once a month. And it just, we don’t have to remember to do it. We just do it. And so that’s been really helpful for us. Another thing to think about is yeah, running a cycle of the dishwasher with a dishwasher cleaner or a cup of white vinegar. White vinegar is a miracle, isn’t it? It’s just a miracle. Yeah. Yeah.
Tonya Kubo (13:33)
Hmm.
Mm-hmm.
I feel like it is, I feel like it is.
Kathi Lipp (14:03)
So ? we just have very tough water up here. So that’s why we tend to use this glisten stuff ? You also want to check the spray arms. So again, I’m not like ? it’s once a month. Let’s check our dishwasher I’m much more loosey goosey than that But if things are coming out of the dishwasher and I’m not liking how they’re looking These are the things I do. So I’ll run the I’ll run an extra cycle with some vinegar
Tonya Kubo (14:26)
Mm-hmm.
Kathi Lipp (14:32)
I’ll check the spray arms for debris. I’ll check in the utensil tray and racks as needed. then you can, know, yearly maintenance. If you need to research for your brand, what your brand suggests. If you have some hard water buildup in there, I’m not going to suggest it because I don’t want to know, but also check hoses for leaks and cracks. If you’re not getting the performance that you want to.
And then I want to talk about loading your dishwasher because that can really affect the performance. I will also link ? the episode of ? Wirecutter, yes, to this, their whole dishwasher episode and the brands that I, we just like, we like the ? Cascade Extra.
Tonya Kubo (15:01)
Mm-hmm.
Wire cutter.
Kathi Lipp (15:26)
That’s the brand that we really, really, really like for our actual dishwasher. But they also go through with about different kinds that, you know, for your dishwasher might be good. But give dishes spaces so water can get in between there. Use designated areas for specific items. So you want plates where the plates are supposed to go. Bowls, cutlery, glasses.
Tonya Kubo (15:27)
Mm-hmm.
Kathi Lipp (15:53)
Check to see if you have a wine glass arm all those kind of things and then ? powders gels and pods What we were told by a dishwasher repairman is never use a gel I It he says When I am repairing I always see under their sink what they’re using and it tends to be gels that where their dishwasher has run down worse
Tonya Kubo (16:06)
Mm-hmm. Mmm.
Kathi Lipp (16:21)
Now we use the pods, which is a gel powder combo. you know, so far we’ve had great results, but that’s just something I’ve heard about. Do you do anything to mitigate the water hardness or is you just have to live with it?
Tonya Kubo (16:26)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, we have a magnet thing that goes inside the dishwasher. And so that’s supposed to help the deposits not form. ? But pretty much everybody in my neighborhood replaces their dishwasher every three years. Or they’ve just decided that they don’t need a dishwasher. And yeah, and we can’t use powder because it’ll etch our glasses. Like anything that’s glass gets etched with the powder.
Kathi Lipp (16:47)
Okay.
Really?
Wow, that is serious.
Wow.
Tonya Kubo (17:07)
We can’t use pods because the hard water mineral deposits build up so quickly that the pods won’t dissolve. Every now and then I’m just like, well, maybe we just skip the dishwasher and we’ll just put another cabinet there. And Brian’s like, or maybe we move. And I’ll say, maybe what we need to do is get like a water treatment system because we need something that’s a little bit more than a softener. And he’s like, or how about we move?
Kathi Lipp (17:22)
Yeah!
Tonya Kubo (17:32)
? so I’ve just stopped making suggestions cause Brian seems to think there’s only one solution, which involves me moving and I don’t like.
Kathi Lipp (17:34)
Yeah
No, you’ve pretty much stated you want to die in this house. So can I tell you the most interesting thing I learned from the wire cutter episode on dishwashers?
Tonya Kubo (17:51)
I wanna hear it.
Kathi Lipp (17:52)
You do not want to clean your dish too much before it goes into the dishwasher.
Tonya Kubo (18:02)
Okay, I need to know why, because I do not believe them.
Kathi Lipp (18:03)
don’t really understand
the science behind it, but they said that your dishes need something, your detergent needs something to grab onto. And so you don’t want things that are caked on there. Like you don’t want to put your eggy dish that has been sitting in the sink overnight in there because that’s too much for almost any dishwasher, or detergent.
Tonya Kubo (18:14)
Hmm
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Kathi Lipp (18:32)
It doesn’t want to have to be perfectly clean. So I’ve I have lowered my standards Thank you very much wire cutter and I feel like I’m getting even better results So it may all be psychosomatic. You know what, but don’t don’t yuck my yum. Okay? ? The other thing that’s really important is hot water if you’re not getting the results you need
Tonya Kubo (18:45)
Nice.
Mm-hmm.
Kathi Lipp (18:57)
One of the things you may have to do is run the hot water and again, this may be like well duh, Kathi to everybody else I did not grow up knowing this so now I know right or Maybe this is something my mom did and I didn’t realize it but you have to run the hot water for a while and even we have found even if we run the hot water at 10 o’clock and then we set the dishwasher for two It seems to be fine. So ?
Tonya Kubo (19:12)
Mm-hmm.
Mmm.
Kathi Lipp (19:27)
And then most of us are going to need a rinse aid of some kind, the finish or something like that. ? Create a daily rhythm, Maintain your dishwasher. Don’t overcrowd it. And then check with your manufacturer to see if there are any extra tips. You don’t have to have the user’s manual. You can go online and look and see what that is. ?
Tonya Kubo (19:31)
Mm-hmm.
Kathi Lipp (19:53)
Is there anything you’re going to do differently, Tonya, because of today?
Tonya Kubo (19:58)
you know what? think one thing that I’m going to do differently, aside from making sure that I run the hot water, cause that’s brilliant. But I think that I am going to do more about checking those cleaning arms. Cause I am good about checking the bottom of the dishwasher. That’s where my filter is. But I only think about the cleaning arms when it’s not working.
Kathi Lipp (20:05)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, great.
Mmm, okay, and I We do have a very sophisticated water filtration system, but I still want to find out about your magnet So we’re gonna we’re gonna put that in the show notes because I think that that might be something that would be really really helpful to us guys I want you to just think through your routine Is there something you could be doing that is going to help you out? And by the way guys, we’re gonna be doing some more
Tonya Kubo (20:26)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Kathi Lipp (20:46)
System spotlights. That’s what we did today system spotlight about your dishes ? in a few weeks We’re gonna be doing laundry. So yeah that I’m excited. That’s a two-parter Tonya It’s too much information to contain in one episode. So You guys are going to love it. Okay guys, we will be back in just a minute We’re gonna take a quick commercial break and then I’m gonna share with you ? this week’s
It has earned a place in my clutter free home. You’re not going to want to miss this episode.
*PART TWO*
Kathi Lipp (00:00)
Hey friends, we are back. We are back. this is, this is my new favorite series. Things that have earned a place in my home. Because as you guys know, not everything that I want actually earns a place in my home.
So in order for it to not become clutter. It has to be something I love I use or would buy again and I’ve got a Three hit I’ve got this one checks all three It’s called Matthew pray like this and it’s by my friend Barb Roose and so I want to discuss it today because we’ve got Barb here and Barb
Welcome back to the program. I’m so glad to have you’re a frequent flyer here on clutter free academy And i’m so grateful to have you back
Barb (00:53)
I love coming back and we’ve only been on here for like 15 seconds and I’m already taking notes on what you just said.
Kathi Lipp (01:02)
my goodness, but it’s so true. Okay, so let me tell you why this is be why I’m saying this like I am because I will tell you my prayer life There’s been a lot of stops and starts recently I’m just in a space where prayer and I’ve been here before and here’s the thing God is so gracious and I know I’m going to get out of that space and it’s going to be okay and
And I have to remember that God doesn’t leave me anywhere for a long time. But prayer has been hard recently, and then I get this book and I’m like, well, all right, OK, so God’s giving me a little tool for this time in my life. So I feel like we’ve all had I don’t want to speak for other people, but I feel like we’ve all had these moments when we’re like prayer isn’t working. I don’t even know what to pray.
I think there’s been a lot going on in my life in my world where I just like kind of hold throw up my hands I’m saying God I don’t even know where to start so I would love to hear from you why why this book why now and What? What do you say to those of us who have been struggling?
Barb (02:24)
Well, I, first of all, what you just shared about where your prayer journey is at right now, it has either created this exhale for listeners who are like, that’s where I felt like I’m at. Cause they have been struggling and they want to pray and know that they should pray. And for a variety of reasons, it just hasn’t looked like how they wanted to. So thank you. Because I think more people are there than not.
Kathi Lipp (02:38)
Hmm.
Barb (02:51)
because prayer is this conversation with God. The barrier always has been that we can’t see God, he’s not showing up, we don’t have like this face-to-face, and so there’s so much in life that can happen. A quote that’s meant a lot to me is a Cory Ten Boom quote. She said, prayer, your steering wheel or your spare tire. And yeah, and so there have been many seasons of my life. This Bible study actually is so wild to me.
Kathi Lipp (03:07)
Mmm.
yeah.
Barb (03:20)
because prayer was mostly a spare tire for me. I grew up as a Christian. I knew something about prayer because of how I was taught, but my mentality, my personality, I was a do first, pray later kind of person, which meant, yep, so I was always busy, had things to do, always kind of felt that guilt in the back of my mind because I was like, okay, I’m going to pray, I’m going to pray and something would come up. The Bible study that you have is a testament
Kathi Lipp (03:24)
Mmm.
Yeah, yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Barb (03:50)
of how God guided me in his gracious love through from a do first, pray later to a pray first, pray often. And that is we all go through these seasons and these spiritual journeys. And he guided me through that in a way that allowed me to get to where I really wanted to be. A woman who prayed every day about everything without guilt or shame.
Kathi Lipp (04:16)
Okay, so I want to pick up on something you just said because this is my first love of this book is that you don’t guilt us into praying more, it guides you into praying more meaningfully. And ? my goodness, it has been, it’s just an invitation. And so yeah, if you’re in that place where you’re feeling like my prayers are hitting the ceiling or I…
I just I don’t even know where to start so I don’t start but here’s here’s just that my moment of honesty because Here’s the problem a lot of Bible studies sound good on the shelf, but they never get opened, right? I mean, it’s we’ve I have been an avid collector of Bible studies for probably the past 30 years my collection abounds But I feel like this one is actually practical practical and doable. So like
What are those things that made it grabbable and why did you, what was your heart behind this? Who is this for?
Barb (05:23)
This Bible study is for everyone at every stage who wants to get to the place where they want to be a woman who prays about everything every day without guilt or shame. So this can be from the woman who is still trying to figure out who God is to the woman who has been following Jesus for a long time. But the heart of the study is that often our problems or our panic drive our prayers.
versus us actually connecting with God. So I wanted to write a Bible study that was about God and not us. And in doing that, it was, let’s start with where Jesus walks us into prayer. And the Bible study itself is framed around walking through the Lord’s prayer as we study the whole book of the Gospel of Matthew. But I wanted it to be where we felt like we had an active role in prayer.
Kathi Lipp (06:05)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Barb (06:19)
So
my particular Bible study style is very application heavy. I love looking at the scriptures and going, okay, what can we learn about God and how do we apply? So each day of the Bible study is a way to step into prayer actively and creatively because I do not want Bible study to be boring. That would be the kiss of death. God is not boring. His word is not boring. So this Bible study,
Kathi Lipp (06:25)
Mm-hmm.
Right. No.
Barb (06:47)
provides these ways that I wanted to hit all of the senses, the thinking, the feeling, the taste, like hearing all of that.
Kathi Lipp (06:52)
Mm-hmm.
And I think you have, I really, really think you have in this. And I love that it’s just six weeks. I feel like six weeks is so doable, even though it’s kind of a chunky book, I’m not gonna lie. Like when I first picked it up, I’m like, oh, there’s some heft to this. And I also love that I was planning to do the whole study by myself. I’ve already delved into it. And I just had a friend who said,
Need a Bible set. I’m like, you know what? It’s gonna work for the two of us too. So I’m very very excited about that Okay, here’s something I know about you Barb, because I’ve had you on many times You have been here for many a Bible study and I know that God always gives you something like a new revelation a new aha, whatever the light bulb is What was it for writing this book because God changes you in the writing of these books?
I’ve seen it many times.
Barb (07:55)
Well, Kathi, have you ever had something you have been praying for for a long time and you’re like, should I keep praying for it? Why am I still praying for it? What the heck? And that was the journey with this Bible study. I tended to treat God a lot like Amazon Prime. I would have a prayer request and then two days later I would be like, so God, why haven’t you answered this prayer?
Kathi Lipp (08:01)
Yes.
Right.
Yes.
Barb (08:22)
Because
if the Amazon Prime people can deliver my stuff in two days, I believe that God could do it a lot sooner. And so for me, this Bible study was about God kind of working the Amazon Prime mentality out. And other people kind of like God’s a vending machine. have this whole, like vending machines are stocked of all the things we love, the tasty stuff. And so people go to God and go, well, I think I should have this blessing and this blessing and this blessing.
Kathi Lipp (08:29)
Right? Right?
Hmm.
Yeah.
Barb (08:52)
That’s not so much me or other people treat God like customer service where you call God up and you’re like, this is a problem, Lord, you need to fix it. This is a problem. We all have those different mentalities, but mine was learning to trust God’s timing and in allow and allowing prayer to be a part of that journey. So I learned for me, the aha moment was that.
Kathi Lipp (09:01)
Mm-hmm.
Mm.
Barb (09:18)
When I persisted in prayer about the thing that was the hardest for me to hold in my life, what God did every time I brought that matter to him was he was able to give me something I needed more. For this thing that that still is important to me, that I still struggle with to this day, I was feeling guilty as a Christian about
Kathi Lipp (09:35)
Mmm.
Barb (09:46)
continuing to pray about the same thing all of the time. What I learned in how Jesus taught about persisting in prayer is that when we bring it to God, he actually uses that thing as a way to bless us with teaching us more about him. So I have been able to learn more, receive more of God’s grace. I’ve been able to receive more of God’s love. I’ve been able to receive more of God’s strength.
so that I don’t try to take matters in my own control.
Kathi Lipp (10:18)
Yeah.
Barb (10:19)
And so that’s the been the learning blessing, the learning journey for me in this study.
Kathi Lipp (10:26)
You know, I think we all have our prayer peccadillas and what I, yeah, and I, what I know mine is, is prayer tinged with jealousy. Like God, I have seen what you’ve done for others. I want that. And to understand that God knows what is best for me, what is best for his kingdom.
Barb (10:31)
Here, I can deal with
Hmm.
Hmm.
Kathi Lipp (10:55)
Is not always what I have seen others have and so i’m still wrestling with that I still fight with that and I think you know, it’s It’s very interesting Here’s my question. We all have these these prayer struggles. What what does matthew say about that?
Barb (11:14)
Well, this is where coming up a verse that I have focused on. It’s right before Jesus teaches about the Lord’s Prayer in Matthew chapter six, three verses before that, Jesus says, don’t be like the babblers who repeat what they’re praying. And I actually just I want to read it because it has really made such a difference for me. He says when he says that,
Kathi Lipp (11:19)
Yeah.
Yeah.
Barb (11:43)
Let me, okay, when you pray, don’t babble on and on as the Gentiles do. They think their prayers are answered merely by repeating their words again and again. This is what I love. Don’t be like them, for your father knows exactly what you need even before you ask. And I was thinking about this because I’m going to tell the very, very small version of this. This story isn’t in the book, but when I was 18, it was my, it was my first semester of college at Christmas break.
And I had been worrying myself sick because I didn’t have the $300 I needed for book money. This was in 1990. My dad called me downstairs and he wanted me to sit down on the couch and he said, Barbara, do you have enough money for books? And my dad was such a loving, kind man, but you did not lie to Bob Neal. And so my eyes dropped to the brass and glass coffee table that my parents had because it was 1990. And I just.
Kathi Lipp (12:19)
Yeah.
Hahaha!
Absolutely.
Barb (12:41)
right? So I shook my head no and my dad pulled out a crisp $100 bill and he laid it on that table. Kathi, dad had lost his long time career six weeks before I left for university. I still had two siblings at home. My parents were trying to make ends meet and my eyes bucked wide open and he said, that not, is that enough money? And I shook my head no because I couldn’t lie. My dad pulled out a second crisp
Kathi Lipp (12:47)
Mm.
Right.
Barb (13:10)
$100 bill. This is a week after Christmas. Me and I’m going, what is happening? Where is this coming from? Dad said, is that enough? And I said, I shook my head no. He pulled out a crisp $100 bill and laid them next to the other two. I never told my parents I needed $300 in books.
I never talked to them. I simply was stressed out, crying all the time. I’d spent all of my Christmas break working temp jobs. And my parents knew what I needed, even though I was at school two and a half hours away. And they had access to resources and understanding beyond what even I knew. And I think that that’s what happens to us when we think about God.
We repeat our prayers over and over again, but our prayers are driven by our panic rather than our trust. Kathi, how many prayers has God answered in your life that you’ve never prayed?
Kathi Lipp (14:14)
Countless. Countless! That’s the only word. Countless.
Barb (14:18)
And so the point of prayer for us isn’t that we need to ask God for things. It’s that we need to be able to see who God is. And so this Bible study, I said it’s about God, not us. So I’ve structured it around four parts of God, who God is, his character, what God has done, his faithfulness, what God can do, his power, and what God will do, his promises.
And that’s what the study is structured around because God knows what we need even before we ask. We can trust him.
Kathi Lipp (14:55)
that’s exactly why this book is staying in my house. Guys, it’s not just pretty, it’s useful. And for someone like me, who’s trying to keep only what matters, I mean, that is everything. Okay, friends, you can grab Matthew Pray Like This wherever books are sold. We’ll have a link in the show notes. Barb, thank you for writing. Thank you for just talking to us about prayer today. And
If you have stumbled in your prayer life or maybe you’ve been hurt by unanswered or delayed prayers, just know that God has you. God sees you. if you need a, I just pray that this conversation has made you feel held when things are not as you hoped for or planned or expected. Friends,
You’ve been listening to ClutterFree Academy. I am Kathi Lipp. Now, go create the clutter free life you’ve always wanted to live.
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