#649 The 5 Cleaning Habits You Should Build in 2025

#649 The 5 Cleaning Habits You Should Build in 2025

649 – The 5 Cleaning Habits You Should Build in 2025

Do you look at your home and feel overwhelmed by the mess, but the thought of a full-day cleaning marathon makes you want to hide under the covers?

Well, you’re not alone!

In this episode of Clutter Free Academy, Kathi Lipp and Tonya Kubo dive deep into practical, achievable cleaning strategies that work for real people with real lives. They break down five key habits that can transform how you approach home maintenance, proving that keeping a clean home doesn’t have to be overwhelming or impossible.

Listeners will discover:

  • The “patch cleaning” method: Cleaning small areas instead of waiting to do everything at once
  • How to implement a nightly kitchen reset
  • The room-by-room rotation cleaning approach
  • How to avoid the all-or-nothing cleaning mindset

Listeners will come away with actionable strategies to maintain a cleaner home without feeling stressed or overwhelmed. The episode is a refreshing take on home maintenance that prioritizes realistic, achievable goals over perfection.

Order your copy of Sabbath Soup here and sign up to receive your free ebook featuring four week’s worth of easy meal plans and delicious recipes.

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Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest

Kathi Lipp gives readers an easy-to-follow process for meal planning and prep, so that they can enjoy a full day each week of real rest and refreshment.

Could you use a break from cooking (and everything else) once a week? Not only is rest vital for your mind and body, it’s good for your soul too. God designed us to enter into Sabbath rest one day per week, but as you know, meals still need to be made. Your family still needs to be fed.

Sabbath Soup includes convenient, seasonal meal plans that take the guesswork out of shopping and cooking. More than just a collection of delicious recipes—including main dishes, breads, breakfasts, desserts, salads, sides, and yes, soups—this is your guide to establishing a weekly rhythm and routine of meal planning and prep that allows you to have a true day off.

Do something good for your soul and experience the peace that comes with a full day dedicated to spending time with God, family, and friends. Savor your Sabbath as you proudly proclaim, “Soup’s on!”

Order your copy of Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest here.

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Meet Our Guest 

 

Tonya Kubo

Tonya Kubo is the illustrious and fearless leader of Kathi Lipp’s Clutter Free Academy Facebook group and the Clutter Free for Life membership program. A speaker and writer, Tonya makes her home in the heart of California with her husband, Brian, their two spirited daughters, and one very tolerant cat. Visit her at www.tonyakubo.com.

 

Tonya Kubo Picture
Transcript
Kathi Lipp (00:19.512)

Well, hey friends, welcome to Clutter Free Academy where our goal is to help you take small doable steps to live every day with less clutter and more life. And I am back. We are with our five daily habits for 2025 and it’s with Tonya Kubo. Hey Tonya.

Tonya Kubo (00:37.018)

Hey there, Kathi.

Kathi Lipp (00:38.638)

I know you have a very, very, very businessy podcast. How does it feel to do a very business podcast? And then we’re talking about how to clean toilets and how to organize your sock drawer. Like, do you feel like you get whiplash between your podcasts?

Tonya Kubo (00:56.859)

especially since the recording days are the same usually. But yeah, it’s kind of fun. It’s kind of fun to have such a difference.

Kathi Lipp (01:00.552)

no, I didn’t know that.

You get to use very, yeah, you get to use very different parts of your brain. Yeah. OK, well, we are back and we are talking about a subject that we don’t talk about very often, and that is cleaning. some people, people always tell me I have a cleaning podcast and I’m like, no, I do not have a cleaning podcast. That’s that’s not who I am. But I have a decluttering podcast and you have to get, you know.

Tonya Kubo (01:10.714)

That is true.

Tonya Kubo (01:27.683)

Ew.

Tonya Kubo (01:32.057)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (01:34.164)

It’s it’s great to declutter before you clean. So you actually have something to clean but I will be honest with you One i’m much better about cleaning than I used to be and two I do have somebody who comes twice a month that does like all the floors all the the you know, the big scrubs, you know, she’s the one who is Down on her hands and knees for the bathtub like that. That just is not my favorite thing. And so i’ve

Tonya Kubo (02:02.97)

Right.

Kathi Lipp (02:04.072)

I’ve decided to exchange a certain amount of money to not have to do that. And by the way, her name is Kelly and she is, she has become a wonderful friend and she loves to clean. Like she says, you know, every once in a while I just can’t sleep. So I get up and clean. I’m like, that has never ever happened to me. No, no. But here’s, here’s what I know. Two things. One.

Tonya Kubo (02:22.566)

Happened to me in my entire life, Kathi Lipp. Never.

Kathi Lipp (02:32.942)

Kelly is not here every day, which makes me very sad. I wish she was here every day. My life would be so much better if Kelly was here every day, but that is not our lives. Also, there are times when Kelly can’t come. We had a five month period this year where it was me and Roger, because she had some shoulder surgery, so it was up to us.

Tonya Kubo (02:37.904)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (03:00.972)

For most of my life, it’s been up to me. And so I’ve had to learn some things and I know that one of the things that really gets me, don’t, tell me if you play these mental games. First of all, one of my mental games when it comes to cleaning is, well, it’s not really dirty. I’m gonna wait till it’s really dirty, cause I’ll feel so much satisfaction when it’s clean. Has that, that, right? my goodness. my goodness. Then I also think,

Tonya Kubo (03:22.981)

Instant gratification!

Kathi Lipp (03:31.246)

it’s so dirty. It’s going to take so long. I don’t have enough time. And so I can’t do it. I swing wildly between those two things and have for years and am just now coming to terms with how to deal with it. And I feel like I had a massive breakthrough today that I I’m going to share with us on number two, but no, yes, number two. Yes. But let me do number one first.

Tonya Kubo (03:35.76)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (03:44.326)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (03:57.45)

I feel like this is the secret tip that we hear everybody talk about, but it really has made the biggest difference in my life. And that is making my bed. I know, okay, what’s your face, Tonya?

Tonya Kubo (04:12.518)

no, I’m sorry. Yes, making your bed is not something we do here in the Kubo household. It is not, yeah.

Kathi Lipp (04:19.712)

Okay, that’s okay. Maybe it has a different psychological effect on different people. Here’s how I think about making my bed. One, I have just made at least a quarter of my room, like decluttered and clean in two minutes. So that makes me super happy. Two, Roger loves getting into a made bed. I like it. He loves it. And he is, I will say,

Tonya Kubo (04:26.533)

Ha ha ha.

Tonya Kubo (04:44.282)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (04:49.646)

Probably 50 % of the time the bedmaker in our house and was not that way when we got married so and then Three it’s a surface that I can fold clothes on It is a surface that I can do projects on for some reason that helps me but that two-minute win Clicks off my day. Is there something like that? That is like, okay if I do this I feel better about the rest of my house

Tonya Kubo (04:52.909)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (05:02.714)

Yeah.

Tonya Kubo (05:18.632)

yeah, for me it’s cleaning off the kitchen table. Like, Brian will tell you hands down, the state of the kitchen table has a direct correlation to my mental health.

Kathi Lipp (05:21.29)

Okay, yeah.

Kathi Lipp (05:29.926)

Interesting. Okay. Okay. It is the opposite for me. Like it has no correlation to my mental health. So that is fascinating. That is fascinating. So you know, whatever that is for you, that cleaning habit that feels like it kicks off all the other things. Make that happen. Okay, number two, this is where I feel like I had my big aha moment today.

Tonya Kubo (05:37.845)

Yeah, no, for me it’s the kitchen table.

Tonya Kubo (05:54.85)

Okay, we want to hear it, Kathi. We want to hear it.

Kathi Lipp (05:58.146)

patch at a time and Let me explain what that means because it means nothing to you right now So you’ve been in my upstairs bathroom. We did a beautiful remodel on that bathroom It makes me so happy every time I go in there the one thing that maybe if I could change on that remodel Would be the floor. I don’t know if you remember the floor it is it’s like

Tonya Kubo (06:02.47)

Hmm.

Tonya Kubo (06:20.571)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (06:24.76)

I just know it heats up and I love that about it.

Kathi Lipp (06:27.402)

Okay, yes, I’m sorry. I’m saying the wrong thing. That floor I love. It’s the shower floor that Yeah, so it is like a pebbly thing and it gets these spots on them and so I bought a tool that is basically a scrubber. It’s a it’s a scrubber that swirls around and it’s electric

Tonya Kubo (06:34.642)

okay.

Kathi Lipp (06:57.046)

So it’s almost like a mop, but it’s a scrubber. But I’m always telling myself I don’t have time to do the entire thing, right? So it just goes on with the spots and it just never looks exactly right. So this morning I’m like, I’m just gonna do six square inches. I’m just gonna do six square inches. And then tomorrow I can do another six square inches because I never seem to have a morning where it’s like,

Tonya Kubo (06:59.546)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (07:19.846)

you

Kathi Lipp (07:26.54)

wow, this is a morning where I have lots of time to clean. Like that morning has not materialized in my life. So I did the six square inches and I’m like, that was easier than I remember. So I did another six square inches and I did another and it took me about four whole minutes to clean the shower floor. But I was okay with just doing the six square inches today and then tomorrow doing another six square inches.

Tonya Kubo (07:40.693)

Mmm.

Tonya Kubo (07:55.183)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (07:55.82)

And we talked about this with decluttering on our last podcast that all or nothing feeling that all like I have to do the whole kitchen counter. Well, no, you don’t actually have to do the whole kitchen counter. You know, do you do you feel like you don’t clean because you feel like you have to do the kitchen sink, the kitchen counter, the stovetop? It all has to be done at once. And I have come more to a rotation theory like

Tonya Kubo (08:01.84)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (08:08.325)

No.

Tonya Kubo (08:18.896)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (08:26.146)

I can clean the sink after we do dishes at night and then that’ll be great. I can also do the counters after we do dishes, but maybe I’ll do the stovetop in the morning because I’ll have a little bit more time to do that. I think it’s okay. Not everything has to be clean all at the same time. You know, there are two days a year where that has to happen Christmas and Thanksgiving because you have people coming over. Everything else is optional.

Tonya Kubo (08:39.354)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (08:55.883)

Is there anything that you do by patches? know you do your kitchen counter decluttering by patches anything else like in the cleaning realm?

Tonya Kubo (09:01.584)

Mm-hmm.

Well, like my bathroom is always done in patches. Like I focus on one aspect of the bathroom every day. So, so like the bathroom sink only gets like cleaned once a week. You know, that’s like one example, like do I clear it off? Do I take a baby wipe and wipe it down sometimes? Sure. But there’s like one day a week where it’s like, okay, like yesterday was the day, which is why it’s fresh in my mind. I clean that.

Kathi Lipp (09:07.512)

Mmm.

Kathi Lipp (09:11.182)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (09:17.97)

Mmm, okay, yeah.

Kathi Lipp (09:26.562)

Yeah. Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (09:32.3)

Yeah.

Tonya Kubo (09:33.734)

the bathtub about once a week, once every other week, because we don’t take a lot of baths. So over there, tends to be the dust. But it’s just every day I go, what needs to be done here?

Kathi Lipp (09:38.179)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (09:41.9)

Yes, absolutely.

Kathi Lipp (09:46.838)

Right and you know, I hear these people online who talk about I just have my routine every day and I do the exact same thing So that my kitchen is always in perfect order that will never be me. It will never ever be me That is not the life I live And so i’m okay with that

Tonya Kubo (09:53.318)

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (10:03.62)

Yeah, I think it just, it just depends. Like it depends on a lot, right? Like I know people who genuinely cannot fall asleep at night if they know there’s a dirty dish in their sink. There are a lot of things, Kathi, that keep me up at night. Dirty dishes in my sink is just not one of them.

Kathi Lipp (10:13.591)

Great.

Kathi Lipp (10:17.878)

Yes. Yes.

Kathi Lipp (10:24.138)

It’s not one of them. It is not one of them. so, and it’s okay if you’re that person like Kelly who cleans my house, that’s her. And she has skills that I do not have. I wish that I had been born with some of those skills. I just don’t have them. But you know, the reason you want to be clean, one is because yeah, we want it to look nice. We want it to feel nice. But two, we’re trying to keep people alive, you know? So like things that keep people alive.

Tonya Kubo (10:29.53)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (10:48.944)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (10:52.014)

You know, disinfecting the counters, disinfecting the sink. Like those things are important to me, but having a spotless refrigerator every day of the year is not as important to me. I do it on a, you know, at least once a month I’m going in there kind of cleaning things out. If there’s a spill, I’m cleaning it up. But I’m just trying to be realistic with the life I actually live and keeping on top of it. Okay. Number three.

Tonya Kubo (10:58.0)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (11:09.733)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (11:19.754)

A nightly kitchen reset. you know, we’ve talked about this before. Roger does the dishes. I, I clean the kitchen. And so I am just doing a spritz and swipe, you know, spritz, spritz, swipe it down spritz. It’s not like a deep cleaning on TikTok all the time. There are these videos of people going in with steam cleaners. like, what are you doing? Are you butchering in your kitchen? Like, why do you need that deep of a clean?

Tonya Kubo (11:32.07)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (11:36.229)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (11:50.094)

The other thing that I like to do is I am going back to number two patch at a time if there’s something on the floor I’m getting out the Swiffer mop and I’m just doing that spot and You know, it’s I’m not doing a full kitchen mop all the time. I we just don’t live that kind of life We did at one point, especially when we had two small kids in the golden retriever There was a lot of mopping going on. But now it’s more getting that

Tonya Kubo (11:55.108)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (12:02.223)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (12:08.048)

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Tonya Kubo (12:14.703)

Right.

Kathi Lipp (12:19.086)

But the nightly kitchen reset is just putting things away It’s wiping things down and then maybe one extra thing like yesterday I noticed that the inside of the microwave was not great So it was wiping that down or maybe the front of the refrigerator. I don’t know I don’t know how it happens, but it’s usually after I’ve been cooking for a while I go to Open up the refrigerator. I’m like, why does that handle?

Tonya Kubo (12:33.712)

Hmm.

Kathi Lipp (12:48.61)

Feel crumbly like that’s not a good feeling so i’m just gonna do that But i’m not gonna do usually all of that at the same time So there is a bit of a reset, but it’s not a full reset every night So for you, it’s the kitchen table Do you have in your perfect world? Is the kitchen table completely cleared off or is there something on it? It’s it’s a flat surface that makes you

Tonya Kubo (12:50.406)

Hmm.

Tonya Kubo (13:00.846)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (13:05.007)

Yes.

Tonya Kubo (13:10.02)

Yes.

Tonya Kubo (13:13.59)

It is naked! I want a naked kitchen table.

Kathi Lipp (13:18.182)

I love it so much. Okay, we’re gonna take a quick break. We’re gonna come back with our last two things like, is one of these a habit that you could pull out for 2025? Because even if you can incorporate one of these things into your routine, it’s gonna make your life so much better. Okay, we’ll be right back.

Okay, we are back with our five habits for 2025. Okay, number four, a bathroom wipe down. So you said that you don’t like wipe down everything every night. I do tend to do that because we are dirty, filthy pigs, Tonya. I don’t know what it is, but the toothpaste, the grimy, I don’t know what it is. We’re just gross.

Tonya Kubo (13:51.974)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (14:03.47)

Yeah, so here’s my problem, right, with wiping things down is I’m the first person who goes to bed. I go to bed a good two hours before anybody else in my house. So I used to have a routine where I would wipe everything down. You know, I’d wipe down the kitchen, wipe down, because I don’t wash the dishes either. Let’s be very honest about this. Like that’s a Brian thing. But you know, I’d go in, wipe down the kitchen, wipe down the bathroom. But what would happen is I will wake up and there will be toothpaste

Kathi Lipp (14:13.527)

Wow.

Kathi Lipp (14:17.74)

Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (14:32.376)

like hanging off the edges of the sink because three people brushed their teeth after I went to bed and I got very grumpy waking up in the morning to a sink that did not look like it did when I went to bed that night.

Kathi Lipp (14:34.888)

Hahaha!

Kathi Lipp (14:41.342)

Right, right.

Kathi Lipp (14:50.208)

Right, right, right, right. We also have another issue that you have experienced. If I don’t wipe down that sink on a regular basis, it turns blue. And that’s not the color I want for my sink. We have copper and yeah, we’ve got something, I don’t know. It’s.

Tonya Kubo (15:07.876)

I was like, I would describe it as a teal, but let’s not have the blush versus bashful argument on the show. But it is, yeah, it’s kind of a pretty blue-green, but not really what you’re looking for with the house.

Kathi Lipp (15:11.085)

Yes.

Kathi Lipp (15:14.9)

Right, yeah, it’s not the color.

It’s beautiful. Not what I’m looking for. Yes, absolutely. So I do tend to wipe those things down and yeah, I do like to wake up to a clean sink too. Now it’s harder for you because you have four people in your bathroom. I just have Roger and Roger’s neater than me. Let’s just be honest.

Tonya Kubo (15:25.861)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (15:34.882)

Yes, four people, one bathroom.

Tonya Kubo (15:39.662)

And I will say one thing I do twice a day, right? Before I go to bed and then when I wake up in the morning is I pick up all the things that have been left on the floor in the bathroom and I put those in the dirty laundry. Cause most of it it’s like towels. Why can nobody put their pants and their underpants in the hamper? I don’t know, but I’m picking up everybody’s pants, putting them where they go.

Kathi Lipp (15:49.056)

Mm-hmm. Mm, yeah, smart.

Kathi Lipp (16:07.027)

bless their hearts, we love them. We love them so much.

Tonya Kubo (16:08.677)

We do love them. But, you know, I don’t want to trip over stuff.

Kathi Lipp (16:14.063)

Yep, I totally get it. Okay. Number five Is a room by room rotation So I don’t do this perfectly but I do it pretty much every day where i’m just going to go spend Five to 15 minutes cleaning something up now one thing I do have and some people might consider this a luxury. I consider it a necessity I have a set of cleaning supplies on each floor so

Tonya Kubo (16:22.63)

Mmm.

Tonya Kubo (16:41.762)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (16:43.686)

In upstairs, have all the toilet cleaner. Well, let’s be honest, in each bathroom, I have toilet bowl cleaner. I have the wipe down stuff. I have the shower cleaner. I also have on each floor of the house, my handy vac and a vacuum. And that makes a huge difference because if I had to take a vacuum up and down the stairs, nothing would ever happen. It would never happen. It just would not happen.

Tonya Kubo (16:51.354)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (17:07.568)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (17:11.872)

And so I have those supplies on each floor and I have supplies like we have a set of supplies in our bathroom and then in our other bathroom. And that makes a difference. But I just spend five to 15 minutes in a different room. Now we have a couple of rooms that we don’t use pretty regularly and I’ve closed those off. So I don’t really count those, but we have the kitchen, the living room, the dining room, our bedroom, my office, Roger’s office and all the bathrooms.

Tonya Kubo (17:21.274)

Hmm.

Kathi Lipp (17:41.71)

You know every day I’ll just pick a room that’s like making me a little insane and just spend five to fifteen minutes like Roger’s Office bathroom I can clean that whole thing in about five minutes. It’s it’s the world’s smallest bathroom. It doesn’t have a shower or anything like that. But you know my bathroom that’s gonna take you know I’m not gonna spend a half hour 45 minutes on it

Tonya Kubo (17:47.236)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (17:56.238)

Right. Yes. Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (18:08.386)

I’m just gonna do 15 minutes to get it back into fighting order. Now, if you’re cleaning your whole house and you have a huge house, you’re gonna need to dedicate more time to that. But Roger is very invested in the happy marriage and me and him, by the way, like every minute I’m cleaning, he would be cleaning too, because that’s just how our marriage works. And he doesn’t wanna spend all that time cleaning on Saturdays either.

Tonya Kubo (18:12.367)

Right.

Tonya Kubo (18:18.926)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (18:28.368)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (18:34.394)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (18:34.478)

That’s not what he wants to be doing either. And so we’ve decided this investment for us. And by the way, it’s a lot less expensive here than it is other parts of the country. I’m not going to lie. We’re very grateful. And we forced her to take raises because we’re like, you’re actually worth more than you’re charging. So Tonya, any cleaning things that are a habit for you that I, I should have mentioned, but I didn’t because I don’t know the secret life of Tonya Kubo.

Tonya Kubo (18:44.218)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (18:48.162)

Yeah

Tonya Kubo (19:01.99)

Well, I think so for me a lot of it has to do with splitting up the labor, which I think we’ve covered but I would just like to Yeah Well because they’re splitting up the labor between people but also between sessions I think a lot of us claim the way that we were taught and some of us were never taught anything, right? So So it’s this hodgepodge of things, but you don’t actually

Kathi Lipp (19:10.166)

We can never talk about it enough. We can never talk about it enough.

Kathi Lipp (19:22.688)

Mmm. Right. Right.

Tonya Kubo (19:30.874)

have to mop right after you sweep. You could sweep before bed and mop first thing in the morning.

Kathi Lipp (19:33.89)

That’s true. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yes, yes. You just want to do it before the grime builds up.

Tonya Kubo (19:42.902)

Right. But I mean, that’s a possibility. There have been asked there have been times in my life because there’s been times in my life, like when I was in grad school and working full time and Abby was too, we had a housekeeper. But there have been times in my life where I could I had time to fill the mop bucket and I had time to like mop. But if I had to sweep before I did it, it wasn’t going to happen. So I have mopped a gross, dirty floor that has not been swept and just said, you know what?

Kathi Lipp (19:44.696)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (20:07.138)

Right.

Yeah, right?

Tonya Kubo (20:12.41)

Whatever ends up in the mop water ends up in the mop water. I’ll dump it out. I’ll sweep afterward. Like, you know, you just have to decide what the priority is. There are days I would prefer personally that we clean the entire fridge, that we empty out the fridge, clean it, wipe down all the shelves prior to going grocery shopping. That would be my perfect scenario. Sometimes, however, all we have time to do is like clear out the leftover containers.

Kathi Lipp (20:17.56)

Yeah?

Kathi Lipp (20:31.214)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (20:34.904)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (20:42.316)

Yeah, yeah.

Tonya Kubo (20:43.398)

And I only have time to wipe down the fridge maybe once a week, once a month, once every other month, who knows? So I think those are some things that we need to give ourselves grace to do what works for us right now. I know a lot of our Clutter Free for Life members, because we talk a little bit more about cleaning there, not because it’s a cleaning program, but just we just go deeper in that program. And I know a lot of members, hear like

Kathi Lipp (21:06.979)

Yeah.

Tonya Kubo (21:10.97)

They hear a parent voice in their head scolding them for being lazy, for being a slob, know, all these ugly names. And so I just think we need to be kind to ourselves and understand that going back to the beginning, right, waiting until it gets super grimy and where we can feel that satisfaction, that actually isn’t kind to ourselves.

Kathi Lipp (21:14.412)

Right.

Kathi Lipp (21:22.179)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (21:28.43)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (21:33.834)

It’s not. And you know what? You should listen to those voices if they’re coming over to your house to clean. If they’re showing up with their mop and bucket, go off clean. You can clean however you want. But also, this is why I don’t micromanage how Roger cleans, which is different than how I clean, because different things are important to him. I’m just grateful it’s getting done. I’m grateful. And he’s grateful it’s getting done when I do it. And that’s a beautiful thing.

Tonya Kubo (21:40.006)

Amen.

Tonya Kubo (21:46.548)

Hahaha

Tonya Kubo (21:53.232)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (22:03.266)

The last thing I’m going to say is when you are feeling really stressed and really behind the two things I would really encourage you to stay on top of if at all possible, it’s laundry and dishes. Like those are the things that are harder. They’re harder if you let them go. And so I, I want you to be able to come downstairs if you live upstairs, you know, and there is room to put dishes in your sink.

Tonya Kubo (22:10.618)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (22:16.261)

Yeah.

Tonya Kubo (22:21.008)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (22:28.208)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (22:32.184)

There is room to put dishes if you have a dishwasher. You don’t have to go hunting for clothes. So stay on top of those routines because a dirty floor takes kind of the same amount of time unless it’s really, really bad. But I just want you to be able to live in peace with the processes you have. Tonya, this has been so good. Thank you so much.

Tonya Kubo (22:39.735)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (22:56.934)

Thanks for having this conversation. This is a good one.

Kathi Lipp (23:00.074)

Yeah, I needed to hear it today too. And friends, thank you for being here. And if you’re feeling behind on cleaning, just know that you are going to be okay. Start to put some little routines into your life that are going to take care of your future self, because that’s what we’re about. You’ve been listening to Clutter-Free Academy. I’m Kathi Lipp. Now, go create the clutter-free life you’ve always wanted to live.

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#648 The 5 Meal Prep Habits You Should Build in 2025

#648 The 5 Meal Prep Habits You Should Build in 2025

648 – The 5 Meal Prep Habits You Should Build in 2025

Hey there, friends! Have you ever stared into your kitchen at 5 pm, wondering what on earth you’re going to make for dinner?

In this eye-opening episode of Clutter Free Academy, Kathi Lipp and Tonya Kubo dive deep into the world of meal preparation, offering listeners a lifeline to more organized and stress-free cooking. Drawing from their own experiences of kitchen chaos, they share seven transformative habits that can turn even the most overwhelmed home cook into a meal prep master.

Listener will discover:

  • Practical strategies for meal planning that actually work
  • Techniques to reduce dinnertime stress and save time and money
  • Insights for families with diverse dietary needs and preferences

Whether you’re a busy parent, a working professional, or someone who dreads cooking, this episode offers practical, achievable strategies to transform your kitchen experience.

Order your copy of Sabbath Soup here and sign up to receive your free ebook featuring four week’s worth of easy meal plans and delicious recipes.

Click here to be notified when the next podcast episode is released!

Also, stay up to date and sign up here to receive our newsletter.

Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest

Kathi Lipp gives readers an easy-to-follow process for meal planning and prep, so that they can enjoy a full day each week of real rest and refreshment.

Could you use a break from cooking (and everything else) once a week? Not only is rest vital for your mind and body, it’s good for your soul too. God designed us to enter into Sabbath rest one day per week, but as you know, meals still need to be made. Your family still needs to be fed.

Sabbath Soup includes convenient, seasonal meal plans that take the guesswork out of shopping and cooking. More than just a collection of delicious recipes—including main dishes, breads, breakfasts, desserts, salads, sides, and yes, soups—this is your guide to establishing a weekly rhythm and routine of meal planning and prep that allows you to have a true day off.

Do something good for your soul and experience the peace that comes with a full day dedicated to spending time with God, family, and friends. Savor your Sabbath as you proudly proclaim, “Soup’s on!”

Order your copy of Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest here.

Links Mentioned:

Garam Masala Spice

Butter Chicken, and thanks to twosleevers.com for this recipe!

Clutter Free Resources:

Can you share a simple meal prep technique for someone just starting?

Share in the comments!

Let’s stay connected

To share your thoughts:

  • Leave a note in the comment section below.
  • Leave an honest review on iTunes. Your ratings and reviews really help and I read each one.

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Meet Our Guest 

 

Tonya Kubo

Tonya Kubo is the illustrious and fearless leader of Kathi Lipp’s Clutter Free Academy Facebook group and the Clutter Free for Life membership program. A speaker and writer, Tonya makes her home in the heart of California with her husband, Brian, their two spirited daughters, and one very tolerant cat. Visit her at www.tonyakubo.com.

 

Tonya Kubo Picture
Transcript

Kathi Lipp (00:29.174)

Well, hey friends, welcome to Clutter Free Academy where our goal is to help you take small doable steps to live every day with less clutter and more life. And we are back today. We are trying to get some habits. And can I just say habits are hard for those of us on the cluttery spectrum, but we’re gonna try to do this gently and easily. And I am here with one of my best cluttery friends. It’s Tonya Kubo.

Tonya, are you a habit kind of person? Would you consider yourself a habit kind of person?

Tonya Kubo (01:03.981)

So here’s what I always say, right? We cluttery folks deeply resist and resent the habits and routines we so desperately need, right? And I am right there. I am right there with you, Kathi. It is hard. It’s just hard. But I need them.

Kathi Lipp (01:13.697)

It’s so true, right?

Kathi Lipp (01:20.234)

Yeah, think, yeah, I think our brains crave excitement. Would they crave variety and interest? And I know you’re like me, I’m always trying to find a better way to do things. I’m always looking for a process improvement. The hitch on that is you have to have a process in order to have an improvement. And so

Tonya Kubo (01:45.157)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (01:47.358)

Have been catches catch can for most of my life, but I’m trying to put habits into my life very gently not punishing myself not saying you’re a terrible person if you don’t do this on this day and Really trying to say okay Kathi you benefit so much if you can think ahead just a little bit if you can do a couple of things in advance you don’t have to do everything in advance, but when I I

Tonya Kubo (01:55.044)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (02:16.65)

I also need to take the moment when I do do the habits to say, your life just got a little bit easier. It just got a little bit better. And so we’ve talked about decluttering and we’re talking about cleaning and things like that. But I also want to talk about meal prep habits. And this has really come to fruition for me with publishing Sabbath soup and recognizing, okay, I do have some habits.

Tonya Kubo (02:24.187)

Hmm.

Tonya Kubo (02:43.439)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (02:43.648)

Like they were never really laid out But I did some things to take care of my future self and that’s really all we’re talking about in this series about habits Is how to take care of our future self? So I know you don’t do things like I do Tonya you have another cook in the house Roger can cook it is not his love language He but you know like today he

I made butter chicken over the weekend. By the way, I’m so mad at myself that I did not put that in Sabbath Soup because that is a, it’s easy and it’s a banging recipe. But absolutely, absolutely. You just have to have one ingredient that you might not have and I’ll never be able to say it. It’s the Marsala spice. How do you say the first word?

Tonya Kubo (03:14.363)

yum.

Tonya Kubo (03:19.908)

Hahaha

Tonya Kubo (03:24.379)

So you’re going to put that in the show notes, right, Kathi? Totally putting you on the spot.

Tonya Kubo (03:38.593)

it’s Garam Masala. There’s no R in the second word.

Kathi Lipp (03:42.272)

I knew Masala. Okay Marsala is like Italian Kathi. Okay, but I’ve never Yeah It’s And you know if you had said it to me I might have said I’ve never heard those words before but that’s like the only Unusual and everything else can will either be in your freezer or in your spice pantry. So

Tonya Kubo (03:48.229)

And I am sure somebody listening will say, that’s not how you say it, Tonya. And that’s okay, we wanna be corrected.

Kathi Lipp (04:08.8)

It’s a very easy recipe, you guys will like it. You do need heavy cream, but I have eaten it without the heavy cream and it’s still delicious. Okay, so I know we said five habits, but I’m gonna give you seven because I’ve done a few things recently that have kind of changed things for me and I wanna share about those too. Okay, so number one, weekly menu planning. So every Monday I make a meal plan. Now, let me tell you, there are points of entry.

Tonya Kubo (04:26.629)

Okay?

Kathi Lipp (04:36.994)

for the meal planning, okay? So if we are broke, the point of entering, and when I say broke, it’s like, okay, we’re just really trying to watch our funds and that’s our current top priority. So what I will do is I will get into the inventory. I’ll see what we have in our freezer. I’ll see what we have in our pantry. I’ll mostly see what might stand up and walk away in a week if we don’t use it. And I’ll plan around what we already have.

If time is a big issue, then probably what I’m gonna do is I’m gonna make a meal plan based mostly on prepared foods. So what can I do with a Costco chicken or, you know, let’s just do the katsu from Costco because yum. Like those are the things I’ll do. So there’s time and money and then energy.

If I know it’s going to be an especially stressful week or exhausting week, we’re going a lot of places, then it’s kind of the same thing as the time thing, but I will do things that have no prep needed. I don’t mind putting on like a pot of rice or throwing some baked potatoes, but I’m not doing anything like searing. If the recipe says chop an onion, it’s not happening on a low energy week.

Tonya Kubo (06:00.827)

Mmm.

Kathi Lipp (06:01.228)

Like here’s a simple meal, first chop an onion. I’m out, I’m out, I’m out. Like I like to be able to just combine ingredients sometimes. And then the other thing for me is I know we talk about space, time, energy and money, but let’s instead of space, let’s talk about stress. Maybe you have some people in your family who are like, I only like buttered noodles. Like I’m going to live on butter noodles until I die.

Tonya Kubo (06:05.883)

Heh.

Tonya Kubo (06:20.635)

Mm.

Tonya Kubo (06:27.675)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (06:30.822)

What what can you do if you know it’s going to be a particularly stressful week? Maybe you have in-laws coming in Maybe you’re a teacher and it’s parent teacher like you may just need to cook for comfort or buy for comfort and so whatever weekly menu plan Accomplishes that make that happen. How do you plan for meals in your family Tonya?

Tonya Kubo (06:54.807)

Yeah, so for me it has to, I mean there is a whole process. So we start with inventorying. My goal is to go to the store as little as humanly possible. And ideally, Brian’s is to go as often as possible. So my second goal is to keep Brian out of the store as much as possible. So for me, like my ideal situation is grocery pickup every two weeks. We’re not there yet. The most we can do is like every week and a half because

Kathi Lipp (07:00.629)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (07:04.222)

Mm-hmm, and Brian’s is to go as much as possible.

mm-hmm okay

Kathi Lipp (07:19.927)

Mm-hmm. Wow.

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (07:23.321)

children as anybody listening can attest are fruit bats. That’s all they do. They like four pounds of strawberries, not enough strawberries to hold them through until tomorrow. It’s just how it is. So inventory first, then based on inventory is when I create my meal plan because I want to use up as much as I have. And then the shopping list comes last. It’s the staples that I need. So in our case, it’s a lot of fresh fruit and then it’s, you know, it’s fresh fruit. It’s milk usually.

Kathi Lipp (07:27.488)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (07:34.266)

my goodness.

Kathi Lipp (07:45.71)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (07:49.187)

Yeah.

Tonya Kubo (07:52.463)

That’s our two staples and eggs. My people eat a lot of eggs. And then from there, it is, you know, then we do our shopping list and we go from there. I do the meal. If meals are going to be planned, I have to do them. Brian is somebody who wants to decide at five o’clock what he wants to eat at 530. And in many cases, what he wants to eat won’t be ready until 730.

Kathi Lipp (07:52.93)

Yeah.

Hmm.

Kathi Lipp (08:02.744)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (08:06.606)

Okay.

Kathi Lipp (08:13.614)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (08:17.77)

Right, right.

Tonya Kubo (08:18.787)

So I try to do the planning ahead. Cause if I say, hey, tonight’s dinner is Korean beef, you need to start it at four o’clock. He will start the Korean Beef at four o’clock. But if I say tonight’s, yeah, but if I say tonight’s dinner is Korean Beef, he will not even think about starting it until he is too hungry.

Kathi Lipp (08:28.654)

Perfect. But you have to… Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (08:39.286)

Right, and can I just tell you, cooking while hungry, I want to be a nice person. I’m normally a nice person, I, yeah, or what I’ll do is I’ll snack the whole time that I’m cooking and then I couldn’t, yeah, yeah. Like right now, it’s not strawberries for us, but those big fatty blueberries right now, I could eat.

Tonya Kubo (08:49.957)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (08:56.261)

That’s what he does, yeah.

Tonya Kubo (09:04.877)

Mmm, yeah, those are tasty.

Kathi Lipp (09:06.79)

whole tray of those by myself and then who who needs Butter Chicken no thank you yeah so I planning your meals will save you so much mental stress and also keep from you you from being a snack monster or and there’s nothing wrong with snacking it’s just you don’t want to cook a whole meal and like I know thank you okay so monday I do the planning Tuesday

Tonya Kubo (09:12.762)

Right.

Tonya Kubo (09:22.885)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (09:36.23)

This is number two is the inventory and shopping list now if we’re trying to save money I’m doing my inventory first. I usually know what’s in the fridge I usually can kind of figure that out, but I am Tuesday is the day where it’s like, okay What do we actually what did I think we had and what do we actually have? And you know, is it still good that kind of thing? So I tend to do Sam’s cart

Tonya Kubo (09:45.423)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (09:57.775)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (10:04.27)

I also tend to do like a grocery store run for smaller, especially perishable things that we’re not gonna eat quite as much of. What’s your shopping strategy, Tonya? You do the order too, right?

Tonya Kubo (10:17.691)

Well, yeah, so there is, I don’t have a lot of options for grocery pickups. So there is a store in like halfway in between where Abby goes to school and where we live in a different town. And so I’ll try to do grocery pickup there, but I can only do it on Wednesdays because Wednesdays is the only time when there’s enough of a difference between when she gets out of school and when Lily gets out of school to be able to hit that sweet spot.

Kathi Lipp (10:28.642)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (10:40.782)

I love that strategy though. I love that. Yes.

Tonya Kubo (10:45.145)

Yeah. So it’s like pick up Abby from school, hit Walmart, pick up the groceries, go get Lily. And then I have two girls and groceries to put away.

Kathi Lipp (10:55.182)

But you know what? You know! You know, isn’t it nice that it’s been decided for you?

Tonya Kubo (11:01.507)

Right. And then if we need something, we have a grocery store that’s not even a quarter of a mile away. It’s just pricier, you know? And so that’s the trade off, right? It’s like, okay, we know what they have. We know we can run in and get something, but we also know we’ll leave like spending triple what we expected.

Kathi Lipp (11:07.958)

Right. Yes.

Kathi Lipp (11:19.156)

I love it. We shop on the same day. It’s, you know, I’ll be thinking of you next time. Okay. Thursday. This is number three. Have a prep day. So for me, this is the day where I prep wash and cut vegetables. Do I need to saute some meat? Do I need to get the meat off of a chicken? If I’m feeling extra saucy, do I need to spatchcock something?

Tonya Kubo (11:24.335)

Haha.

Kathi Lipp (11:48.718)

That is my day to prep the food because prep is to me is different than cooking Like and it may not be for everybody, but it’s so nice to go into cooking day where I’m like, okay I can just throw everything and I’ve I’m doing the lettuce for at least half the week You know if you get it nice and dry it could almost last an entire week. I’m washing the fruit for a week

Tonya Kubo (11:48.795)

Mmm.

Tonya Kubo (11:57.157)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (12:16.931)

I am chopping up veggies that I’m gonna throw into sautees and stuff for a week. Are you a prep and cook on the same night kind of person or what’s your deal?

Tonya Kubo (12:28.013)

Yeah, it just depends. So for me, if I’m going to do any prep, my only options for prep are Friday nights or Saturdays because my work week is so heavily scheduled. So I will do that. My family will not use prep prep stuff, though. That’s old to them. And because we have listeners, I’m just going to say big fat air quotes around old because we all know it’s not old. It’s perfectly fine. But they get to tell themselves whatever stories they want.

Kathi Lipp (12:38.045)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (12:45.115)

it…

Kathi Lipp (12:58.328)

They really should not eat in restaurants. Because I have worked in a restaurant and prep is really, really important. Yeah, anyway, well, you know what? I don’t have to live with them. that’s just fine. That’s just fine. Okay, so we’ve got through our first three. So weekly menu planning, do an inventory and shopping list, and then a prep day.

Tonya Kubo (13:01.25)

I know.

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (13:08.709)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (13:20.411)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (13:26.198)

We’re going to take a quick break break and we’re going to come back and we’re going to talk about a little more prep that you can do to make Another habit that you can do to make your life a little bit easier. Okay, we’re going to take this quick break and we’ll come right back

Okay, we are back with number four, some meal prep habits to get you through your week. This is number four, breakfast prep. I now do something, and we’ll talk more about it. It’s, I call it my power hour, which, you know, I’m just trying to hype myself up. But every week I make a big pot of oatmeal that has whatever fruit is like,

You know, it’s time to use it up. It’s not bad. It’s not moldy. It’s not gross, but like the bananas my you know, there is a certain threshold where Roger will eat a banana and then 20 seconds later that threshold has been crossed Never to be seen again. So we make a big pot of oatmeal with blueberries and bananas and apricots To kind of throw all that in there. I also my mom was she good. She’s like

Tonya Kubo (14:20.667)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (14:24.987)

Yup.

Tonya Kubo (14:35.387)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (14:39.374)

you know, once every couple of weeks, she likes to have a little treat and go to McDonald’s and get a sausage biscuit. And she said, Kathi, that sausage biscuit was almost $6. And I said, mom, and we’re going there tonight. I’ll wake up tomorrow. I’m going to make that woman a homemade sausage biscuit. Because yeah, because we all enjoy a sausage biscuit every once in a while. But there are certain things you could prep ahead of time.

Tonya Kubo (14:56.037)

Whoa.

Tonya Kubo (15:00.571)

You

Kathi Lipp (15:04.524)

You know, for your kids, it’s like packing a lunch, but maybe it’s packing a breakfast instead. And I know that when my kids were younger, we often did breakfast in the car just because we had no other, nobody was sitting down to eat a breakfast at our house when my kids were in elementary, junior high and high school. That just, that, that did not happen. What, what do you do? Do you do anything to get ahead on breakfast at your house?

Tonya Kubo (15:13.648)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (15:18.927)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (15:28.759)

Yeah, so what I found is I need to at least have an idea because it doesn’t matter what I have. I could have like five boxes of cold cereal. I could have bagels. I could have frozen waffles except for Lily and for Ryan. So that leaves Abby, I guess. Abby’s expectation is I’m going to tell her what to eat and I’m going to prepare it for her. And they are a lot alike. So.

Kathi Lipp (15:33.707)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (15:45.739)

Yeah

Kathi Lipp (15:50.862)

Can I just tell you, Abby and Roger are so much alike.

Tonya Kubo (15:57.197)

You know, Lily likes to be self-sufficient, so she takes care of herself. Brian prefers these like Jimmy Dean frozen sandwiches, like McDonald’s frozen sandwiches, right? I used to make breakfast burritos that we froze that they could heat up. Nobody would eat them but me. I’ve tried the homemade biscuit things. Nobody eats those but me. So now what I say is before everybody goes to bed, say here are your three options for breakfast tomorrow. This is what you guys have.

Kathi Lipp (16:05.592)

Right, yeah, yeah.

Kathi Lipp (16:15.288)

Mmm.

Kathi Lipp (16:25.39)

Mmm, nice!

Tonya Kubo (16:26.971)

So tomorrow, if I want them to eat cold cereal because I’ve got cold cereal to use or I have no other ideas, I put the cereal on the table. So they come in and it’s like, it’s a cinnamon toast crunch right in front of me. I should have that.

Kathi Lipp (16:34.958)

So smart.

Kathi Lipp (16:41.484)

Wait, hot sauce? Is that like, I’m excited?

Tonya Kubo (16:44.675)

No, sinuh- Huzzah.

Kathi Lipp (16:46.924)

Huzzah, I thought you said hot sauce. I’m like, is there some new slang I don’t know about? Got it. Okay.

Tonya Kubo (16:49.147)

I’m sorry. That’s all.

Kathi Lipp (16:54.318)

Huzzah, yes. Okay, yes, because if it, yes, Roger is the smartest man I know, helps around the house, but he would prefer that I just told him what to eat and then he pushes back a little bit on like, ooh, I need this little adjustment or I’d like the, really.

Tonya Kubo (17:04.123)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (17:09.453)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (17:14.083)

They are the same person. Abby wants you to tell her what to eat so that she can then suggest alternates. She likes veto power.

Kathi Lipp (17:21.844)

Right. Yes, we just did this thing where we were, I think I told you about it on one of our calls, we were doing a Roger wanted to watch football. I still don’t get it, but okay. But for Roger, an important part of football were are snacks that he thinks go with football. So we did a seven layer dip and he’s like, but I don’t, you know, I want you to do the seven layer dip, but I don’t really like the canned pinto beans.

Tonya Kubo (17:33.499)

haha

Tonya Kubo (17:37.371)

The snacks!

Tonya Kubo (17:49.603)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (17:49.814)

And so I told you, I took some bacon grease and I, by the way guys, this guy would swim across shark infested waters to get me a glass of lemonade. So if the man wants warmed up pinto beans, I am happy to do it because trust me, I’m getting the better end of this deal. But yes, he needed to let me know his mods. Yeah, this is the modification I need. Okay, Tonya, I have a very important question for you.

Tonya Kubo (18:04.731)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (18:12.246)

Mm-hmm, yeah.

Kathi Lipp (18:19.628)

Are you a food house or are you an ingredient house? Do you know what I mean by that?

Tonya Kubo (18:24.407)

I prefer, yes, I prefer to be an ingredient house, but I think the nature of how we are, Brian commutes, Abby goes to school a half hour away, we have activities all the time. I do need to make sure there are some foods that we can lean on, but it’s hard, because I just, that’s not how I wanna operate.

Kathi Lipp (18:28.908)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (18:36.376)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (18:42.902)

Yeah, it is hard. Well, and it’s so interesting. Okay, and if you don’t know what we’re talking about, you’re like food and ingredients are the same thing. Food is more grab and go, whereas ingredients have to be assembled, prepared, that kind of thing. And I think you have to have a balance of both. You know, for a snack, I don’t wanna like…

Tonya Kubo (18:57.52)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (19:08.366)

cook the garbanzo beans and crush them into hummus. Like, no, I want the hummus there. Like, I’m not going to make a tortilla chip. You know, those are the kind of thing. But it’s been very interesting to me on social media recently, where I don’t think it’s the people who grew up in ingredient households. And I think ingredient households are usually people who are maybe,

Tonya Kubo (19:12.165)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (19:35.116)

whose families growing up struggled more financially and or are maybe a different ethnic background than the color of my palm or are super crunchy, super, super crunchy households. But on TikTok, you see all these grocery hauls.

Tonya Kubo (19:38.779)

Mm.

Tonya Kubo (19:52.837)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (20:00.997)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (20:01.304)

where it’s like, it’s $450 for one week’s worth of food, but it’s chips, soda, frozen pizzas, tortino, know, pizza rolls, that kind of thing. And I’m like, and somebody finally came on and said, it’s not that groceries are expensive because groceries are expensive, but you don’t know how to cook. Like that’s the problem. You don’t know how to cook. So.

Tonya Kubo (20:05.477)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (20:09.061)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (20:29.558)

Like I buy a lot. I do buy some prepared food I would say probably 25 of what we buy is prepared foods, but I also know I have to portion those things out if I go grab a bag of things. I can mindlessly eat and i’m not doing this for diet. I’m just doing it because I want to feel okay I mean i’m not doing it because I want to lose weight. I am doing it because of a food diet but

Tonya Kubo (20:41.541)

Hmm.

Tonya Kubo (20:52.347)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (20:59.47)

Portioning those things out saying okay, you know what? I’m gonna buy the little cups of hummus, but that has to last me a month So I know I’m gonna eat about three of those a week because that makes me happy Portioning Some of our treats into smaller things and it means like I may buy the big bag of chips But I’m gonna portion those into little ziplocks

Tonya Kubo (21:08.197)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (21:27.756)

Because to me that makes more sense than buying individual chips. You know what I mean? They’re mostly air. Yeah. Yeah. So do you do anything to portion out food or do you, do you buy portion to food? Like every answer is acceptable. I just, my frustration with TikTok is look how much this is costing and I’m buying

Tonya Kubo (21:36.089)

Mm-hmm. Yeah, the little like snack bags of chips.

Tonya Kubo (21:49.935)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (21:56.536)

highly convenient foods that I don’t need to touch.

Tonya Kubo (21:58.489)

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, so we have to do it a little differently here. So for my family, there is no difference between buying a bag of chips and a box of 40 snack bags. They’ll eat five snack bags in one sitting. So that’s like irrelevant. And there are certain things, right? I refuse to battle over food. I refuse to put padlocks on my pantry or anything. I have friends who do all that. I have friends who do it and it’s what they do and that’s fine for them, but I will not.

Kathi Lipp (22:12.712)

Mm-hmm. my gosh. Yeah, that makes sense, right.

Kathi Lipp (22:21.902)

Yes, 100%. Yeah.

Tonya Kubo (22:30.905)

So it’s, buy this, you know, I buy what I buy and it lasts as long as it lasts. And if I don’t wanna go to the store, then you’re gonna wait until I go to the store or you’re gonna wait until I order groceries. You may have to go five days without snacks. You’ll live, we all live.

Kathi Lipp (22:35.468)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (22:40.716)

Yeah.

Right. No, that makes total sense. And yeah, there are definitely tiers of snacks, aren’t there? You know, it’s like…

Tonya Kubo (22:52.665)

Yeah, I will tell you one thing I do though. So I will buy extra and then I stash the backup. Like I have a back stock stash that goes, it’s on the top shelf of my closet. Nobody looks for food there.

Kathi Lipp (22:59.427)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (23:08.128)

Right, okay, I used to wrap things in aluminum foil and market liver and Nobody in my family ever Like we never ate liver the entire time they lived in our house and they still don’t know that Yeah, but you do what you have to do, right? We

Tonya Kubo (23:20.005)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (23:25.391)

Yeah. But I’m telling you, nobody gets more excited than when they thought there was no more Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Can you tell what Brian Kubo’s favorite cereal is? They haven’t seen any Cinnamon Toast Crunch for four days and suddenly they’re Cinnamon Toast Crunch out. I’m the hero.

Kathi Lipp (23:33.203)

Ooh, yes.

Kathi Lipp (23:38.754)

Yeah. Okay. I love that. You are the hero. Yeah. Roger. I have obtained hero status several times when I’m like, no, I know where that is. And you know, when we had kids in the house, there were two things like there was the liver trick and also there was Christmas box. think it was number five. We never had anything in Christmas box. Number five, except for the food that like

Tonya Kubo (23:50.777)

Haha.

Tonya Kubo (24:00.987)

Mmm.

Kathi Lipp (24:06.678)

I didn’t I wanted to buy the big pack but I didn’t want to put it all out at one time because we had four teenagers, you know I mean Justin ate face cream one time like

Tonya Kubo (24:14.413)

Yeah.

Tonya Kubo (24:20.975)

haha

Kathi Lipp (24:25.802)

Okay, number six, leftover makeover Monday. So we have like our big kind of family meal on Saturday, but I always know that that’s going to be a loop meal on Monday. So if I roasted chicken, it’s going to be chicken tortilla soup or chicken tortilla salad or something like that. You know, so planning, we’ve talked about it before, loop meals, leftovers on purpose. And then number seven,

This is new, something new I’ve been doing. And can I just tell you, Tonya, I’m kind of a genius. I’m not gonna lie, not gonna lie. You know, I make a lot of dishes. Like I’ll make soups, I’ll make, you know, all these things. And then it’s like, I wish we had baked potatoes to put that on or I wish, so what I’ve started doing is once a week, it’s like my carb prep.

Tonya Kubo (24:59.971)

Okay?

Tonya Kubo (25:22.171)

Mmm.

Kathi Lipp (25:24.296)

I will put, I’ll prep six baked potatoes and put them in the air fryer. I’ll do a big pot, or instant pot of rice. I do jasmine rice, that’s the one I do. I’ll do a batch of pasta on the stove. I’ll do my slow cooker with oats and fruit and bananas and spices, and I’ll do one batch of muffins.

And I can get all of that prepped in about 40 minutes. And we are set for the week. We don’t have to keep making rice or keep making. And so I do six air fryer baked potatoes because we take some to our neighbor. But also that gives us four that if we wanted to have a baked potato as a side dish, great. Or if I’m running out of ideas for lunches.

Tonya Kubo (26:21.711)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi Lipp (26:21.784)

then I’m just gonna throw a baked potato and we’re gonna find what’s in the fridge and use it up and use what’s left over. I did fried rice the other day, because I channeled my inner Kubo and just did a bunch of stuff in there. This makes such a difference. I feel so much more prepped for the week. And all of these are relatively inexpensive to do.

Tonya Kubo (26:34.944)

Yeah

Tonya Kubo (26:42.235)

Mm.

Kathi Lipp (26:47.234)

but they make such a difference to getting dinner on the table or lunch on the table. I know you’re a big rice household. Do you do anything else to kind of prep for the week?

Tonya Kubo (26:53.019)

Hmm.

Tonya Kubo (26:58.943)

Yeah, so for us, I mean on Sundays I usually cook the equivalent of what would be two like big meals. With the idea is one’s gonna be Sunday dinner and then leftovers will get us lunches for a couple days and then the other one is going to be our like repurposed Monday and Tuesday night dinners. Because that’s sort of what we need to do. So for us, you know, like we’re probably making rice twice a week.

Kathi Lipp (27:07.575)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (27:18.02)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (27:21.475)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (27:25.645)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (27:26.055)

And then there’s very rarely leftover rice and if there is then that becomes fried rice. We will, so potatoes, my family doesn’t like leftover potatoes except Lily and I will eat cold potatoes for lunch. Like we’re weird like that. It’s kind of fun for us. And I will make a loaf of bread. So I make, I have an easy sourdough recipe. So I make a loaf of sourdough bread probably every other Saturday. And that’s something that can get us through.

Kathi Lipp (27:30.798)

Yeah.

Kathi Lipp (27:35.352)

Hmm.

Kathi Lipp (27:38.754)

Yeah, I love that.

Mmm, yeah.

Kathi Lipp (27:50.424)

nice.

Tonya Kubo (27:53.883)

I think it’s helpful. Although the homemade sourdough bread is not quite like store-bought bread, right? It like just doesn’t quite last as long.

Kathi Lipp (28:00.738)

Okay. yeah. Yeah, that totally makes sense. Yeah. Well, it’s so good to, you know, know what’s going to help your family get through and don’t make potatoes if your family’s not going to eat potatoes. You know, if they’re not muffin people don’t do a muffin. Yeah, Tonya, go for it.

Tonya Kubo (28:10.843)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (28:17.979)

one thing that I do love to make ahead. I love to hard boil eggs over the weekend because I like a hard boiled egg for breakfast. And so does Lily. She doesn’t like to take them in her school lunch because she thinks it just makes her whole backpack smell. She’s not wrong, but yeah, she’s not wrong. But you know, she’ll take a hard boiled egg. I’ll take a hard boiled egg. So that is something like I bought my Instant Pot purely for two reasons. One was to make hard boiled eggs in bulk.

Kathi Lipp (28:24.328)

yes, yes. Yes, yes.

Kathi Lipp (28:32.898)

They smell. It does. She’s not wrong.

Kathi Lipp (28:42.111)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (28:47.181)

and the other was to make my own beans.

Kathi Lipp (28:50.902)

Okay, you know what? You’ve just reminded me of something, because I want to start making beans along with the prep, but the eggs, I had forgotten. And you know, I love eggs on salad. Like that makes me super happy. And I also love egg salad because apparently I’m channeling my 95 year old Eunice, because it just makes me so happy. Okay, this is so great. So guys, don’t try to do all these things. Take one thing.

Tonya Kubo (28:56.699)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (29:03.963)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (29:10.989)

Yep!

Kathi Lipp (29:19.732)

Make it a habit and then build on that habit and you’re going to have a much easier time Tonya. This was so great Thank you i’ve got some ideas from you that I am going to i’m going to instigate and i’m so excited about it Eggs and beans are going on the list. I love it. Well friends. Thank you for hanging out with us You’ve been listening to Clutter Free Academy. I’m Kathi Lipp now Go create the clutter free life. You’ve always wanted to live

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Hey friends! Have you ever felt so ashamed of your home that you would rather hide than invite anyone over?

In this powerful episode of Clutter Free Academy, hosts Kathi Lipp and Tonya Kubo dive deep into the emotional landscape of clutter, shame, and isolation. They candidly share personal experiences of feeling trapped by household disorganization and the psychological barriers that prevent people from seeking help.

Listeners will discover:

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  • The importance of accountability and community in overcoming organizational challenges
  • The benefits of joining the supportive, compassionate Clutter Free for Life community

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Click here to be notified when the next podcast episode is released!

Also, stay up to date and sign up here to receive our newsletter.

 

Join Clutter Free For Life

While Clutter Free for Life comes with a plan of action to keep you moving forward in your decluttering journey day after day, the true magic of this membership program is in the community. It’s a program FOR cluttery people BY cluttery people.

It’s a family of cluttery people who want better for themselves and for you. We all understand the emotional weight of clutter and the physical barriers it causes. Clutter Free for Life members have a team of experts who know what it’s like to feel overwhelmed as their guides. Want to see whether the membership is right for you? Check out our info page Clutter Free For Life.

Can you share a personal story about how clutter once isolated you?

Share in the comments!

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Meet Our Guest 

 

Tonya Kubo

Tonya Kubo is the illustrious and fearless leader of Kathi Lipp’s Clutter Free Academy Facebook group and the Clutter Free for Life membership program. A speaker and writer, Tonya makes her home in the heart of California with her husband, Brian, their two spirited daughters, and one very tolerant cat. Visit her at www.tonyakubo.com.

Tonya Kubo Picture
Transcript

 

Well, hey friends, welcome to clutter free Academy where our goal is to help you take small doable steps to live every day with less clutter and more life And I’m back and you know guys, we’re just gonna keep talking about it. We’re gonna keep talking about clutter. We’re gonna keep talking about all the reasons that we need to crush the clutter in our lives, especially as we’re going into the holidays because can we just, okay, I’m gonna say something controversial. Hey, Tonya, by the way. Hey, Tonya’s here. Can I say holidays are their own form of clutter?

 

Tonya Kubo (00:42.622)

Bye.

 

Tonya Kubo (00:49.406)

they totally are.

 

Kathi (00:51.2)

Yeah, that you know, clutter is not always bad. I right now downstairs, I’ve got some clutter on my table. But the clutter on my table is stuff I want. Or I don’t know if I want it, but I have to investigate like there’s mail down there. One of another podcaster I was on her show, we were talking about soups and we were talking about her favorite soup. And she said, my favorite soup is made with chow chow.

 

Tonya Kubo (00:57.49)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (01:21.676)

And I’m like, the only thing I know that is chow chow is either dog foods or dogs. So, do you know what chow chow is? How do you know what chow chow is?

 

Tonya Kubo (01:28.584)

Mm.

 

Yeah. Yeah.

 

Church fundraiser cookbooks?

 

Kathi (01:39.523)

Okay, that is fascinating. So, chow chow, would you explain it because I’ve actually never tasted it. Go for it. Or do you know? I know it’s made with cabbage, right? It’s like a relish with cabbage.

 

Tonya Kubo (01:56.11)

It’s, I think it’s a relish and people put whatever they want in it. It’s one of those things, it reminds me of, you know, it’s like every family has their own way of doing it, but it’s like canned, it’s home canned. And the people who love it, really, really love it. My mom hated it. My mom was like, ehh.

 

Kathi (02:17.48)

Mm-hmm. Okay.

 

Kathi (02:23.128)

So I was having this conversation with another podcaster and she was telling me about her, believe it’s a beef stew recipe that uses chow chow as a main ingredient. And I said, well, that sounds really interesting. She was kind enough to, she went to an Amish store and shipped me two cans of chow chow, or at least that’s what she’s told me. I have not opened the box yet, but I’m gonna go buy the ingredients to make her recipe and.

 

Tonya Kubo (02:27.016)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (02:31.986)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (02:42.162)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (02:47.517)

Right.

 

Kathi (02:52.738)

do that. So it’s clutter, because it’s not put away. But also there’s a category of clutter, where there’s no way to put it yet, because I have never had a chow chow section of my pantry before. And I just like saying chow chow. Can you tell?

 

Tonya Kubo (02:55.676)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (03:07.456)

Right. I know. But remember, our definition of clutter is do you love it? Do you use it? Would you? Could you buy it again? I add the could you part. But for you, you know, it’s like it just needs to find a home.

 

Kathi (03:13.688)

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (03:25.408)

So, so Tonya what this is is Schrodinger’s chow chow because I both want it and don’t know if I want it I both will use it and have never used it And I don’t know that I would buy it again because I’ve never bought it once So it is it is Schrodinger’s chow chow and that’s okay. That’s okay

 

Tonya Kubo (03:51.55)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (03:52.362)

We don’t need to we don’t need to have a category for everything there has to be some space in your house for the things that you haven’t decided on but I do want to talk about what clutter can do to us because you and I have both lived with hoarders and I would say one of the the worst part about clutter hoarding is the extreme version obviously

 

Tonya Kubo (04:01.447)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (04:17.662)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (04:20.792)

But even as a young mom, I really struggled with clutter. And I would say it was isolating for me. Like I didn’t want to have people over. I remember thinking, it’s okay to have kids over, but I don’t want to have their parents over until a kid said something about my clutter. And I’m like, well, I don’t want to have anybody over anymore. And I, did you…

 

Tonya Kubo (04:39.154)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (04:48.61)

Did you also experience that isolation with your clutter?

 

Tonya Kubo (04:53.116)

Yeah, well, I mean, you referenced it in your book, Clutter Free. And I remember the first time I read that and realizing, right, like I couldn’t have anybody over when I was a kid. I mean, every now and then my mom would make an exception. But, you know, it was always having to balance like, OK, if I let a friend come over, were they going to go to school and talk about how my house looked? Right. And then, you know, I made a conscious decision, especially when the girls were little, that I wasn’t going to let the condition of my house.

 

Kathi (04:56.492)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (05:13.342)

Right. Yeah, right.

 

Tonya Kubo (05:23.326)

prevent me from inviting people over. So I would just tell people, I’m not cleaning for you. But I had a similar experience when I was pregnant with Abby. And like I had a potluck, a mops potluck at my house. And this one little girl came up to me and she was like, why is your house so messy? And my friend got offended for me. My friend Justine, who you know, got really offended for me. And she was like,

 

Kathi (05:49.358)

Bye now, Justine.

 

Tonya Kubo (05:51.612)

because she works full time. That’s why. she, I remember the little girl, cause she said, you only have one child and my mom has four. Why is your house so messy? My mom keeps our house clean. Which you know she got because her parents were talking about that at home, right?

 

Kathi (06:06.169)

Kathi (06:10.798)

I want to retroactively punch somebody in that family. Maybe not the child, but somebody.

 

Tonya Kubo (06:15.836)

Ha ha ha ha ha!

 

Tonya Kubo (06:20.994)

Right, and so then of course you have my friend Justine Popsin, well because she works full time and your mom doesn’t. Right, which is of course like total mommy-war stuff.

 

Kathi (06:31.106)

Yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (06:33.054)

I just looked at it I said, know what? A clean house is a higher priority for your mom and your dad than it is for me and my husband. That’s all.

 

Kathi (06:44.494)

Okay, you gave the highly evolved answer. I might have said something like, well, your mommy’s also on antidepressants, which really helps with the… No, I wouldn’t have said that, but I’d want to say that because there’s no shame in being on antidepressants at all. Let’s be super clear. But also, I would want that little girl to be… I would want to punish her.

 

Tonya Kubo (06:44.572)

End.

 

Tonya Kubo (07:13.15)

Nah, she didn’t know any better.

 

Kathi (07:13.334)

Okay, you know what? I take back what I said about the antidepressants because people I love the most in the world are antidepressants. But that would have been my very unevolved response 30 years ago when I had kids and mops. Okay, that’s cute that I think I had kids. Yeah, 30 years ago. Okay, yeah. So I’m sorry. I’m just I’m, I’m, I’m D detangling stuff.

 

Tonya Kubo (07:30.686)

No.

 

Tonya Kubo (07:36.296)

I apologize for derailing our conversation about isolation.

 

Kathi (07:40.366)

You know, I think about it though, because well, okay, I think we just proved something there, or at least I did my unevolved response proves something. What will make me act terribly faster than shame?

 

Tonya Kubo (07:58.482)

Mm-hmm. yeah, totally. Well, and we have talked about this several times, right? We see that in Clutterfree Academy. I mean, so often, you know, we don’t get a lot of prickly people in there nowadays, right? Because we have such a strong culture and everybody really does want to be kind, but…

 

Kathi (08:01.923)

It

 

Kathi (08:08.47)

Yeah. Yeah.

 

Kathi (08:14.272)

No. Mm hmm.

 

Kathi (08:21.027)

Yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (08:21.746)

The times that we do get somebody super prickly, it’s because they are so deeply embedded in shame that they can’t see their way out of it. And I feel like, you know, it’s that hurting people hurt. A lot of times they’ll lash out because they want to take the offensive rather than, cause they assume somebody’s going to lash out at them.

 

Kathi (08:28.941)

Yeah.

 

Kathi (08:34.902)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (08:39.81)

Yeah.

 

Kathi (08:44.844)

Yeah, Tonya, have you heard that? Maybe we’ve talked about it on here, the 17 diapers discussion. Have we talked about that? Yeah. And, you know, I think the people who are so hard on the mom who had 17 diapers for her brand newborn, who was doing it all on her own, are the people who either there are two ends of the spectrum. They get their validation from their house being perfect.

 

Tonya Kubo (08:51.034)

Yes, I think a couple episodes ago.

 

Tonya Kubo (09:04.883)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (09:14.846)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (09:15.554)

Or I could never live like that, but they’ve got some something else that they would never ever tell another human being. And so like, well, I’m not 17 diapers, so you’re worse than I am. Well, yeah, but you know, you do this other thing that you would never want the world to know about. it’s clutter can be so isolating, you know, and I think

 

Tonya Kubo (09:29.896)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (09:43.938)

once we get to a certain point, we feel like we can’t ask for help. Like I dug myself into this. I’m going to dig myself out. And we just don’t have a support system. And we get to this place where there’s so much self-criticism. We start to change the chemistry of our brain to believe, can we actually do something about this or not? So we have well articulated the problem. You have also seen my

 

Tonya Kubo (09:51.036)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (10:13.656)

propensity for rage based on something that was said to Tonya maybe 10 years ago, but here we are. Here we are, friends.

 

Tonya Kubo (10:20.594)

Yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (10:25.786)

Everybody knows what a loyal friend you are though, Kathi, now.

 

Kathi (10:28.442)

Yeah, I write it done But I want to come back to what are some things that if you’re feeling in that space where you feel like you can’t do anything What are some things that you can actually get done? So we’re gonna take a little break and come right back

 

Okay, friends, we’re talking about the shame and isolation of clutter. And Tonya and I want to come back and talk to you about that. Because we’ve both been there. We know a lot of people who have been there. And we know that there’s a way out because here, I love that story about the man who falls down in the hole. And a you know this story. And I’m sure most of our listeners do but

 

Tonya Kubo (11:06.856)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (11:11.97)

You know, a priest walks by and says, I see you’re down in the hole. And he throws a prayer down to him. And then a politician comes by. He says, I see you’re down in the hole. And he throws a law down to him. And then there’s a police officer who comes by and he throws a law about you’re not supposed to be down in the hole. And then finally, a friend comes by and

 

He jumps in to the hole and the guy in the hole says, why did you do that? Now we’re both stuck in the hole. And the friend who jumped in says, yeah friend, but I know the way out and I can show you. So let’s get out together. like I’ve heard that story for 25 years ever since I first heard it on West Wing and it still gives me chills because I feel like

 

Tonya Kubo (11:56.36)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (12:10.924)

That is so much of what we do in Clutter-Free Academy and Clutter-Free Life is friend, I’ve been in the hole before, but I actually know the way out. Let’s get out together. And maybe you don’t know your way completely out of the hole. And by the way, Tonya, that person from the Mops group would come to my house today and her daughter would say, why is your house so messy?

 

Tonya Kubo (12:12.882)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (12:39.264)

And I would say, you know what, my house is perfect for me. Because apparently her mom had different priorities and that is just fine for her family. But my home is happy, my home is clean. And we get to do a lot of wonderful cooking and loving and entertaining and work in our homes. And I’m really, really grateful. And so if that sounds like how you want your home to be.

 

Tonya Kubo (12:42.333)

Hahaha

 

Tonya Kubo (12:52.488)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (13:08.18)

If that sounds like how the kind of home you would like your kids or your grandkids to be in, I would love to tell you some things that have happened for us. So first of all, accountability. Tonya, how do you feel like accountability works in our groups?

 

Tonya Kubo (13:26.192)

Yeah, well, in ClutterFree Academy, right, the accountability piece is really more on the member. We have some members that want to be, you know, they want support and accountability. And so they post their before and after pictures. They ask specifically like, hey, you know what, can somebody check in on me at the end of the day, make sure I did what I said I would do. Whereas in ClutterFree for life, because it’s a paid membership program,

 

Kathi (13:34.786)

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (13:54.608)

and people really are saying, I am going to pay you to boss me around, Tonya Kathi Grace, right? We actually are a little bit more proactive in the accountability. So we’re checking in daily. I am somebody who pays attention if somebody who has been active is quiet and I reach out to them. And usually, I mean, like I’m not like calling them or showing up at their house, okay? I’m not over the top, but I’ll tag them in a post in the group.

 

Kathi (13:59.778)

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (14:12.812)

Mmm. Yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (14:23.486)

I might drop them an email just to see. Because the thing is, is I know life gets in the way of our best intentions all the time. And what I know is that once you fall out of that routine, sometimes, like for me, all I need to do is skip two days and it’s no longer my routine. It’s no longer a habit. Like that’s how fragile my habits are. And so I know that on day three, it’s very easy to say, well, you know what? I messed up. I’m out for the whole month.

 

Kathi (14:31.63)

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

 

Kathi (14:52.332)

Right. If it’s not perfect, then I’m not going to get the rewards of somebody who’s perfect. So I’m out of here.

 

Tonya Kubo (14:52.999)

Right?

 

Tonya Kubo (14:58.982)

Yeah, or you know what? I have let Tonya and Kathi down. I get apology emails left and right. I am so sorry, Tonya, but this happened and that happened and you know what? I’m like, I get it because I felt that way too. And I’m always like, please pick up wherever you left off, just pick it up. We’re here for you. Is there something I can immediately help you with? And I’ll tag them in that post or that coaching session. Because that’s the other thing is,

 

Kathi (15:17.101)

Yeah.

 

Yes.

 

Tonya Kubo (15:28.062)

Our weekly coaching sessions, as much as they are designed to help people with the next step, they’re a great place for people to come and discuss what’s hard and get peer-to-peer support in addition to support from our team.

 

Kathi (15:39.074)

Yeah.

 

Kathi (15:43.758)

Yes, and I love the accountability. It keeps me on track because it’s so easy for life to crowd out things in another way. But the accountability says, no, Kathi, you’ve said that this is important to you. We’re just reminding ourselves of what’s important and that’s what we need. So there’s power and accountability being able and I think part of the accountability for me is to say I’m not the worst person in the world.

 

Tonya Kubo (15:52.819)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (16:00.538)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (16:14.297)

yeah.

 

Kathi (16:14.316)

that I don’t have the worst house in the world. And another part, and I know you’ll get this Tonya, and I think our listeners will too, cleaning out that drawer in my bathroom that has been bugging me for so long and has made me feel gross. If I shared that with my family, they might say, well, that’s what you’re supposed to do. But if I share it with,

 

Tonya Kubo (16:17.34)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (16:24.04)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (16:33.555)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (16:41.435)

Right.

 

Kathi (16:43.776)

My clutter free group. They’re going to say no we get this that’s important. That’s big And getting that, you know sharing strategies getting that support Is so crucial, but I think the number one thing for me is saying You don’t need to live in shame I have been there or I am there and you know, the only shameful thing is to give up and I don’t even want to shame people who are giving up because

 

But the only thing that should be like, I need to change this desperately right now is giving up. Because you’ve said that this is important to you and you wanna live a different way and we wanna be there to help you. And the longer I do this, Tonya, the more I see our clutter-free group being like any other recovery group, like an AA meeting or an NA meeting or.

 

Tonya Kubo (17:25.502)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (17:38.322)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (17:42.358)

You know a whatever whatever kind of meeting you can think of way that Yeah, you can do it on your own, but why make it a thousand times harder?

 

You know, because be around people who not only support your recovery, but understand the challenges you’re having in that recovery.

 

Tonya Kubo (18:03.386)

Yeah, well, people having ideas that you haven’t thought of. mean, this is something that has come up quite a bit in the paid membership program is a shoe or buying a shoe organizer to organize unmentionables in a way that they hang on the back of a door in a house that doesn’t have a lot of space. Right.

 

Kathi (18:19.47)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (18:27.138)

Yeah, interesting.

 

Tonya Kubo (18:28.796)

I mean, it’s fascinating actually, the different things you can put in a shoe organizer. But some of us are like, well, it says shoe organizer, so we only think of using that for shoes. And then somebody else says, this is what I do. And you go, I can’t even visualize that. And then they say, well, I’ll just post a picture. And then you’re like, wow.

 

Kathi (18:33.667)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (18:39.512)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (18:50.006)

Yeah. Okay. You know why I love that so much, Tonya? my goodness. Do you know why I love that? Because the things online are only the aesthetically pleasing things because you want to be able to go to your drawer and see all the little compartments and you want to get that high from it being overly organized and color coordinated. And you know, there are organizing systems out there that, you know, you, you put things from yellow to purple.

 

Tonya Kubo (19:01.32)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (19:19.772)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (19:20.026)

And that’s the only way you’re and it makes me crazy because our houses are not set up like that I don’t have a walk-in closet My closet is a walkout closet, know, and I do have a shoe organizer in there But can I tell you my shoe organizing system? Do you want to hear how awesome this? Okay So every night when I’m getting into bed and I’m changing into my clothes, I kick my shoes into the bottom

 

Tonya Kubo (19:27.773)

Right.

 

Yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (19:39.366)

I do, I wanna hear it.

 

Kathi (19:49.39)

the closet in a jumble and then on Saturdays I put them away so You usually have five to six pairs of shoes on the bottom of the closet For about a week and then I put them away so I can find them again But you know what it works for me. Yeah, am I am I ready to get photographed for House Beautiful? I am NOT and if they came here, I’d break their camera, but it

 

Tonya Kubo (19:51.07)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (20:13.852)

Right.

 

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (20:17.792)

My life is so much better than my shoes being all over the house every day tripping over them. It’s, it’s, do I want to be perfect or do I want to be sustainable? I want to be sustainable.

 

Tonya Kubo (20:30.46)

Yeah, no, exactly. mean, and I’m somebody, I only like alternate between two pairs of shoes usually. I tuck them underneath the bed, right? Because I get dressed in the dark because I get up hours before Brian does. So I just, there’s one little spot underneath the bed. That’s where my shoes live. I put them on, I’m good to go. And I think that’s the other thing that, so there is a time for aesthetics. There really is.

 

Kathi (20:36.824)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (20:40.366)

Perfect. Yeah.

 

Kathi (20:45.836)

Yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (21:00.892)

But most of us now is not that time, right? Now is the time to minimize, like get as much out of there and to make our houses functional. So, you know, like for us right now, like socks are such a battle when you have kids and it was fine when their feet were not as big as mine. Now that our feet are all the same size.

 

Kathi (21:12.782)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (21:18.638)

Yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (21:27.774)

It’s a problem. So we have two of those fabric cubes and all the socks go in there and we don’t match them. We don’t do anything. It is absolutely not a great long-term solution, but I don’t have socks all over the house and I’m not worried about whose socks are in whose drawer.

 

Kathi (21:44.814)

Okay, can I tell you my ultimate sock solution that I did when I had teenagers? I don’t know if this will work for you, but my girls would keep stealing my socks. I had black no-show socks. So what I did was I ordered a dozen Barney socks and.

 

Tonya Kubo (21:48.59)

I’ll take it. I will take it.

 

Kathi (22:11.726)

they were never touched by my teenage girls.

 

Tonya Kubo (22:15.423)

that’s funny.

 

Kathi (22:16.972)

Because I was so sick of, I literally did not have socks. And I’m like, I, go ahead.

 

Tonya Kubo (22:21.478)

Right. Well, I was going to say, yeah, I don’t have socks, but it’s not the girl’s fault. Remember, Brian does the laundry and Brian has an organization system that is called Mine Not Mine.

 

Kathi (22:29.326)

Right?

 

Tonya Kubo (22:36.922)

And if it is not his, then it goes all in the same pile. Right? And so the girls and I, was like their underwear in my drawer, my underwear in their drawer. And I would always like hold up their underwear. like, what part of you thinks this is my size? And that’s when he explained, he’s like, Tonya, it’s a simple system. It’s mine and not mine. And if it’s not mine, I just kind of assume maybe it’s yours.

 

Kathi (22:43.01)

Yes.

 

Kathi (22:47.726)

Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (22:53.366)

Right, right, right, right.

 

Kathi (23:05.302)

Okay, thank you, Brian, for doing laundry. Grateful.

 

Tonya Kubo (23:06.59)

Exactly. I am grateful for the laundry and now we have this weird commingled sock thing, but it works for now. once, Lily and I have been talking about this, it’s like, okay, once our frustration level gets to the point that we are ready to solve it on our own, we will do that. Until then we do not complain and we tolerate the solution that dad has come up

 

Kathi (23:25.708)

Right. Right.

 

Yes, Barney the Dinosaur, just keep that in your back pocket.

 

Tonya Kubo (23:34.928)

I might actually, that’s tempting.

 

Kathi (23:39.138)

Yeah, just make your stuff so undesirable that nobody else in the house will touch it. Yeah. Okay. So Tonya, this is literally the last day of our sale.

 

Tonya Kubo (23:44.872)

Right.

 

Tonya Kubo (23:51.794)

Right, well, we haven’t even talked about the clutter free for life sale!

 

Kathi (23:54.646)

So here’s why I’m gonna ask you if people are feeling isolated, what is our last ditch effort to say one, you’re the person who might benefit from this and two, what it’s gonna change for you.

 

Tonya Kubo (24:09.05)

I mean, it’s clutter free for life, right? So I guess here’s the thing is if you were looking for your house to be Pinterest perfect in 30 days, this is not the program for you. This is for the person who says it’s going to take time. It’s going to take effort. It’s a day to day thing that I’m going to have to work on. I’m going to slip. I’m going to fall. I might not even like look at the program materials for three months time. I may not. But when I’m ready,

 

Kathi (24:12.045)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (24:39.354)

I will have this whole community of people who are waiting for me and are happy to help me pick back up. Then Clutter Free for Life is 100 % for you. You can do our annual pass right now. It’s over 60 % off of regular price. Month to month is totally an option as well. But right now the annual pass is just 118 for a whole year. That’s what, like nine bucks? You do the math way better than I do, Kathi. It’s like nine bucks a month.

 

Kathi (25:04.098)

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (25:07.958)

And it’s worth trying out and giving it a go. And if it’s not for you, then you’ll know in the first 30 days, I think. Because we’re pretty laid back and sometimes we’re just too laid back for people. I get that. But I really think you just… They do. People do come in really expecting me to be mean. And I’m just like, I don’t have it in me. I’m sorry.

 

Kathi (25:16.482)

Yeah, for sure.

 

Kathi (25:21.696)

Yeah, no, they want us to be meaner to them.

 

Kathi (25:30.732)

No, that’s not what we do here. We’re nice and Right

 

Tonya Kubo (25:34.106)

I have a lot of compassion and I think my compassion, I actually had somebody last January who was like, no, like I don’t deserve compassion. And I was like, yeah, you do. And they were telling me, they’re like, you don’t understand. And they were telling me like how lazy they were and all these things. And I said, wow, you have really high expectations of yourself. And they were like, well, yeah. And I said, and how’s that working? And they just kind of stopped. And I said, you know, like,

 

Kathi (25:46.04)

We all deserve compassion.

 

Tonya Kubo (26:04.07)

I can’t say the word right now. Recrimination, self-recrimination has, like it sounds like you have a history of that and it hasn’t been effective. So what if we tried compassion?

 

Kathi (26:06.636)

Yeah, yeah.

 

Kathi (26:14.092)

Yeah, yeah, because if you’re going to keep doing the same thing you’ve always been doing and it hasn’t worked And here’s the thing I come from a generation I come from generations of people who wanted to shame themselves into better behavior And it just it doesn’t work. Okay friends today’s the last day, but here’s the beautiful thing if it doesn’t work for you 30-day guarantee what if you got to lose and I think

 

Tonya Kubo (26:28.882)

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (26:43.488)

If you stick with it, you’re gonna see results. You may not feel like you see results in the first week, but within the first two weeks, you’re gonna start to see some noticeable results in your life. And we wanna be there to cheer you on. So I’m putting the link down there. It’s normally 299. You can join any time of the year for 299. But if you wanna get the super, because we like to onboard everybody at once. It saves our team a lot of time and a lot of energy.

 

Tonya Kubo (26:55.166)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (27:10.79)

Yep.

 

Kathi (27:13.006)

118 and That’s It’s less than $10 a month To know that you’re on the right track Tonya. Thanks for hanging out with me Okay, and friends, thank you for hanging out you’ve been listening to clutter free Academy. I’m Kathi lip now Go start the clutter free life. You’ve always wanted to live

 

Tonya Kubo (27:21.63)

Mm-hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (27:26.44)

Thanks for having me.

  

 

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Hey there, friend! You know that feeling when you’ve spent an entire weekend decluttering, only to find your house looking exactly the same three weeks later?

You are definitely not alone!

In this enlightening episode of Clutter Free Academy, Kathi Lipp and Tonya Kubo tackle the persistent challenge of the clutter cycle. They explore why homes seem to accumulate clutter despite repeated decluttering efforts and offer practical solutions for creating lasting change.

Listeners will discover:

  • The value of setting realistic goals with a maximum of three priorities per day
  • Ways to help children develop organizational skills without creating tension
  • The importance of understanding different organizational styles within the family
  • Why small, consistent actions lead to lasting change

The hosts share personal experiences with generational clutter patterns and discuss how different organizational styles within families can impact home management.

Click here to be notified when the next podcast episode is released!

Also, stay up to date and sign up here to receive our newsletter.

 

Join Clutter Free For Life

While Clutter Free for Life comes with a plan of action to keep you moving forward in your decluttering journey day after day, the true magic of this membership program is in the community. It’s a program FOR cluttery people BY cluttery people.

It’s a family of cluttery people who want better for themselves and for you. We all understand the emotional weight of clutter and the physical barriers it causes. Clutter Free for Life members have a team of experts who know what it’s like to feel overwhelmed as their guides. Want to see whether the membership is right for you? Check out our info page Clutter Free For Life.

What’s your advice for someone who feels overwhelmed by generational clutter patterns?

Share in the comments!

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To share your thoughts:

  • Leave a note in the comment section below.
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Meet Our Guest 

 

Tonya Kubo

Tonya Kubo is the illustrious and fearless leader of Kathi Lipp’s Clutter Free Academy Facebook group and the Clutter Free for Life membership program. A speaker and writer, Tonya makes her home in the heart of California with her husband, Brian, their two spirited daughters, and one very tolerant cat. Visit her at www.tonyakubo.com.

Tonya Kubo Picture
Transcript

 

Well, hey friends, welcome to Clutter-Free Academy, where our goal is to help you take small, doable steps to live every day with less clutter and more life. And I am back with your Clutter Crusader. It is Tonya Kubo. Hey, Tonya. So today, I think this is such an interesting topic that we’re gonna be talking about today, is the clutter cycle. 

  

Tonya Kubo (00:49.324) 

Hey Kathi. 

  

Kathi (00:59.717) 

And there are lots of ways that we can be talking about the clutter cycle. You and I have both had cycles in our family that were clutter. I mean, I remember, I don’t know, did you know your grandparents? You did? Okay, were they cluttery people? 

  

Tonya Kubo (01:17.426) 

so my grandmother died before I was born, but my grandfather, he was disabled. like, he didn’t, like he, we lived with him. So it can’t really say whether he was cluddery or not. 

  

Kathi (01:27.337) 

Kathi (01:30.863) 

Got it. Okay, because your mom who was a hoarder could have been the one who was bringing the clutter in. Yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (01:39.328) 

Yeah, I mean, so what I know is that my grandmother was very, very particular about how clean the house was. And there was a 100 % right way to do things and then everything else was wrong. 

  

Kathi (01:48.133) 

Mmm. 

  

Kathi (01:52.655) 

Got it. Isn’t that interesting? So on my mom’s side, like my mom would get in trouble if she didn’t clean up all the little pieces of paper from the paper dolls, or if she left the scissors out. And on my dad’s side, I just remember chaos. Like, you know, my grandfather was a house painter after his sports career, and my grandmother was an artist. 

  

Tonya Kubo (02:06.317) 

Mmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (02:11.63) 

Mm. 

  

Kathi (02:21.569) 

And I just remember there was always stuff around, like just stuff. But it didn’t feel cluttered to me. It just felt full. I don’t know, you know, a perspective of little kids. So there’s those kind of cycles. But then there’s also the cycle of just the overwhelm of our own house’s clutter. And I think that there is that feeling of overwhelm. And I don’t know where to start. 

  

Tonya Kubo (02:27.288) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (02:31.117) 

Yeah. 

  

Kathi (02:51.333) 

which is the internalized criticism. But then there’s also, if you live with other human beings, the frustration of, is it all up to me? Should it all be up to me? Why is this my problem and not the household problem? I think that you and I have felt that at different times, probably with our kids, but 

  

I also have to defend other people in my family saying, you know, it’s a kid’s job to be cluttery. Like that’s part of their role. And so it’s for me, it’s always been more of a partner thing than it has been a parenting thing. How about for you? 

  

Tonya Kubo (03:27.832) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (03:35.146) 

Mm-hmm. Well, think, yeah, that’s the same. I just, I’m not bothered like other people are bothered by it because I just understand the nature of clutter is that it’s a cycle. And I think other people, and I mean, we see this all the time in the Facebook group, especially when people come in brand new, there is this skewed perspective. 

  

Kathi (03:46.341) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi (03:50.213) 

Yeah, yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (04:01.974) 

that if I just get the house decluttered, then it’ll stay that way without me having to do anything extra. And I understand that it’s just an ebb and a flow. 

  

Kathi (04:05.711) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Right. Right. Yes. 

  

Yeah, because we all love that high right after something’s been decluttered, right? Where we know where the scissors are, we can open that box and what it says on the outside of the box is on the inside of the box. And it feels so good. And then, but I think lots of times those decluttering, let’s just say binges where we binge declutter, we are relying 

  

Tonya Kubo (04:39.308) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi (04:44.011) 

less on systems and more on memory. Like I just put this thing there last Tuesday, so it’s probably still there. I just put the scissors there last Wednesday, so they’re probably still there. And so we have less of a system and more of a, I just put it there. And then as other people start to get involved in the binge, that’s when it tends to fall apart. 

  

And I know I will admit, I have been the person who says, why can’t you just put it back where it belongs? And they’re like, well, where would that be? Because I wonder if this is part of the cluttering profile, because I’m always trying to improve systems. Because I’m kind of equal creative and executing. 

  

Tonya Kubo (05:34.446) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (05:41.57) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi (05:42.669) 

So I’m always trying to think of could we do this better? Could we do this better? Instead of, you know, pouring into deep systems, I’m just trying to always improve the system. So what was true last week is no longer true. Do you feel like that about yourself? Not at all. Do tell. 

  

Tonya Kubo (05:51.48) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (06:00.302) 

Right. Not at all. No. I never, I will never rearrange my furniture. I am the person who moved into a house that had pictures on the walls and I never removed them. 

  

Kathi (06:14.607) 

Shut up. 

  

Tonya Kubo (06:16.782) 

Just don’t care. Like, it’s just, can I live here? Sure. Can I live with this? Fine. I like, I have zero desire for decoration and it falls into my clothing too. You and me talk about clothing all the time. You know, some people are like, Tonya, you’re so good. You know, you just, you’re so into what your purpose here is in the world that you don’t care about styles or trends. And I’m like, no, it’s not cause I’m a better human. It’s cause quite honestly, I don’t have the energy for 

  

Kathi (06:29.123) 

Yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (06:46.892) 

Like, I do not feel like I haven’t like ascended to some special like, I don’t need to care about my appearance. I still have the energy. It’s like it has nothing to do with that, but sure. 

  

Kathi (06:56.401) 

Tonya, you’re just so much closer to Jesus than the rest of us. 

  

someday I will be like Tonya. By the way, you look fabulous today. Your glasses are so on point. I love them so much. you know, I also know, yeah, so I do try and I’m not always good about updating the decor. I will say a lot of things that we when we bought this house, they had some really cute stuff that they left behind and it’s still in the same spot. 

  

Tonya Kubo (07:06.318) 

No! 

  

Tonya Kubo (07:10.318) 

Thanks. 

  

Tonya Kubo (07:28.814) 

Mm-hmm. Yeah. 

  

Kathi (07:32.513) 

Then we have people like to kneel in our lives who come to our house and say, can I just rearrange everything? And I’m like, sure, I don’t care. 

  

Tonya Kubo (07:36.099) 

Yeah 

  

After, after to Neil and I visited your house, was like to Neil, can never come to my house. Cause like I like, no, no, you can, you cannot do those things. But you know, and I say this, you know, for our listener, because I do know that some of them kind of trend more toward where I’m at. You know, we had a situation where like where we kept our leftover containers, right? Some people call those tougher wear reusable containers, whatever you call them. We kept them in one like. 

  

Kathi (08:04.133) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (08:06.636) 

when we moved into the house, it was like, yeah, that seems like a good place to put things. So we put them there. We knew for years it was not really functional. were all these problems with it. It took me a year of thinking before I could come up with another place to put it. It’s just, it’s really hard for me to shift. I’m not a good systems creator. I’m a good systems assimilator. Right? So I can ass… 

  

Kathi (08:28.785) 

that’s good. That’s a real skill though. 

  

Tonya Kubo (08:31.606) 

I can assimilate into just about anybody’s system, but to create one from scratch is hard. So no, I’m never thinking of ways to improve the process. 

  

Kathi (08:40.133) 

See I am the good creator, but not the good assimilator like even into my own systems But I am let me just say this a good systems Bullpucky detector When I you know, I just saw an article yesterday dollar store solutions For your storage needs and they were talking about like the Tupperware stuff 

  

Tonya Kubo (08:45.168) 

Tonya Kubo (09:05.486) 

Ugh. 

  

Kathi (09:07.741) 

And they were saying, you should put all of your small storage containers and lids in lingerie bag. And I say, I call a bullpucky on that. No, that would, it’ll make you feel good for a moment, but it will not, it will not make your life better. So here’s what Tonya and I are gonna do. We’re gonna go pay some bills and when you come back, we have fully explored the problem. 

  

Now we’re gonna come up with some solutions to breaking that clutter cycle. So stick with us and we’ll be right back. Okay, Tonya and I are back. we wanna talk about how can you break those clutter cycles. I would love to say for once and for all, this is like those Buzzfeed articles that say, 

  

Stop your snacking once and for all. There’s no stopping your snacking once and for all, but I can give you, Tonya can give you some ideas of how you can interrupt those cycles so that you’re constantly getting better. Because here’s what I’ll say, Tonya, I don’t feel like there has ever been one trick, one solution, anything that has changed my life, but it’s been a lot of small decisions reinforced day over day over day that have 

  

taken me from cluttery to come onto my house. You know, like I feel like that that is the evolution. So the first thing is no overhauls, right? No overhauls. I give you permission from the Lord of Decluttering on High to do 15 minute sessions. 

  

Tonya Kubo (10:35.042) 

Nice, yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (10:44.566) 

Hmm. 

  

Kathi (10:58.213) 

If you have set aside time I give you permission to do up to an hour of decluttering if you’re gonna be going deep on a project because I understand if you’re trying to Declutter a kitchen cabinet It could take 15 minutes. It could take 45 minutes and you don’t want to just do that in 15 minute segments. So Giving yourself focus on 15 minutes 

  

Tonya Kubo (11:18.894) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi (11:27.959) 

and give yourself permission once at the maximum twice a week, unless you’re moving or something, for an hour session. Tonya, how does this look in your household? 

  

Tonya Kubo (11:40.59) 

Well, for us, you know, I think we run kind of like a lot of families with small kids. you know, Monday through Friday is really about survival. And then the weekends are where you try to get things reset. So I do like when we’re not and we have tons of activities. So when we don’t have a ton of activities or if we have at least one down day, I have everybody work on their space, their individual space for an hour. 

  

Kathi (11:49.849) 

Yeah. 

  

Kathi (11:53.483) 

Mm-hmm, yeah. 

  

Kathi (12:09.637) 

Mmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (12:09.942) 

Right? So that can be the girls working on their room together for an hour. Sometimes actually I have to put one girl in there all by herself for an hour and then move that girl out and put another girl in because they don’t have the same systems. But that’s what we do. And then in terms of the day to day decluttering, that is all on me. Like there is nobody else in this house that’s going to set aside 15 minutes a day unless we’re in middle of a challenge of some sort to focus on decluttering. 

  

Kathi (12:17.369) 

Yeah. Right. Yes. 

  

Kathi (12:27.886) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi (12:34.529) 

Yeah. So Brian is in charge of things like laundry and stuff like that, right? And so you’re more of the decluttering diva in the household. Okay, no, that totally makes sense. You both are contributing in ways that make sense to you and feel right to you. And I love that. Okay. So breaking those tasks into manageable, manageable chunks. So 

  

Tonya Kubo (12:41.454) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (12:46.541) 

Yeah. 

  

Kathi (13:03.833) 

Tell me how do you guide your girls through making it manageable to get rid of stuff? 

  

Tonya Kubo (13:11.96) 

Well, so for us, it’s never not a conversation. We talk about it in some way every single day. So it can be going through the backpacks, right? So, you know, both of my girls are neurodivergent. There’s just a lot about how their backpacks look that kind of fits both of their archetypes. And so going through and just saying, you know, it’s so much easier to throw away one piece of paper or to go through the pencils and toss the one broken pencil. 

  

Kathi (13:20.323) 

Hmm. 

  

Kathi (13:24.922) 

Yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (13:42.426) 

each day than it is to have to like go through that backpack at the on Friday and go through 10 crunched up pieces of paper or whatever else is in the bottom of the backpack, right? So that’s part of it is just reinforcing that if we do a little touch every single day, it’s so much easier than if we save it all up to the end of the week. 

  

Kathi (13:52.644) 

Yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (14:04.93) 

But then it’s also when they make some headway is giving them reminders. So like with Abby, you know, we’ve just gotten her started where she puts away her own clothes. And it’s like, you know, Abby, if you put it, if you put undies in this drawer and shirts in this drawer and pants in this drawer, it’s so much easier to get dressed in the morning than if you want to shove everything in one drawer. Because that’s really what she wants to do, because she doesn’t actually want to put her stuff away. So she just wants to shove it all together, right? It is. 

  

Kathi (14:24.239) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

I don’t blame her. It’s the worst part of laundry. It is the worst part of laundry. Yes. 

  

Tonya Kubo (14:33.366) 

I will give you that. It is the worst part of laundry. So those are some things we do and just talk about like see how easy this makes our life isn’t this much easier than it was before. 

  

Kathi (14:42.989) 

Isn’t it so interesting that as kids, we buck those systems so much, but as adults, the thing I hear about decluttering so much is I need accountability. I need somebody to be in this with me. And we see what we needed as children. I think the difference is that you really know your girls’ types, and you’re able to say what works for Lily doesn’t work for Abby and vice versa. 

  

Tonya Kubo (14:54.466) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (15:04.782) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (15:08.846) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi (15:10.489) 

And maybe we didn’t have a parent that was quite as in tune to that. So that makes a huge difference. OK, also, setting realistic goals. I know that this has been really hard for me. Like my to-do list at the beginning of the week can look like, do you have a crew coming over? Do you have magical elves that are going to help you with some of this stuff? So. 

  

Tonya Kubo (15:30.53) 

Yeah. 

  

Kathi (15:38.853) 

How do you keep your own goals realistic? And I’m asking this in a holistic sense because you also have a business, have, mean, so how do you keep your goals realistic throughout the day? 

  

Tonya Kubo (15:46.126) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (15:52.686) 

Well, so for me, I don’t ever allow myself to have more than three items on a list. Like that’s a hard rule. I remember years ago, you know, how I was introduced into the work world. And I think for some of us who didn’t grow up in environments that were organized, we learned organization and whatever was imposed upon us in our first jobs. And so, you know, I was trained by somebody who had this like running task list, we’d have like 25 items. 

  

Kathi (15:57.743) 

Mmm. 

  

Kathi (16:12.419) 

Right, yes, absolutely. 

  

Tonya Kubo (16:20.812) 

and they would just add stuff to the bottom and cross off from the top and then it would just roll over to the next day. So they were always making a new list every day and that would have stuff carried over. And I think that it just, it’s not helpful. It’s not helpful to have a list of 10 items. It’s like, okay, before my head hits the pillow, there are three things I have to get done today. What would those three things be? And there’s some days like today’s a day, for instance, I started with meetings at 4.30. I have not had more than a 30 minute break. 

  

Kathi (16:34.351) 

Yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (16:49.824) 

and I won’t get a break until six o’clock tonight, right? So that’s gonna be my day. So when I woke up this morning, I had my three priorities that I wrote last night. And it’s like, okay, now that I look at my calendar and I recognize that I am a human who hopes to at some point eat some food, it’s just one thing. What’s the one thing that I have to get done the day before my head hits the pillow? And then that’s how I said it. And I’ve learned to be okay with that. I think that’s the other thing is you have to not be 

  

Kathi (16:53.713) 

my word. 

  

Kathi (17:06.937) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi (17:12.591) 

Yeah. 

  

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (17:20.47) 

You have to not let yourself get into the place where you’re feeling guilty for not having more things on your list. 

  

Kathi (17:25.327) 

Right, because if only I were superhuman. And it’s like, well, that’s such a ridiculous statement, but for some reason, we don’t expect that of other people, but we expect of ourselves. And that’s something we need to combat. And that I know that when you have challenges, you have a family reward system. Talk a little bit about that. 

  

Tonya Kubo (17:29.421) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (17:35.114) 

Mm-hmm. Exactly. 

  

Tonya Kubo (17:48.736) 

I do. So when we do like, for instance, we’ve got 30 day 1K coming up, which is like my favorite time ever as of recording. So we have a tracking sheet. There’s four of us. So it’s very easy to find a pack of highlighters that has four colors in it. And everybody gets to mark theirs off. And then our reward system is the winner. In this case, it’s whoever declares more items. The winner gets to pick the prize. 

  

for everybody, right? And sometimes I pick it just because, you know, one year it was like, well we should go to Disneyland for this. No, you’re not going to Disneyland because you declared 200 items. Sorry, it takes more than that. But, you know, being able to say, okay, we’re gonna have a family movie night. That’s the prize. And the winner picks the movie or the winner picks the snacks for family movie night. That’s a big one. Like the girls really love to pick the snacks for family movie night. 

  

Kathi (18:29.615) 

Right. 

  

Kathi (18:45.887) 

Okay, yeah, okay, so I just have to ask what are some favorite snacks? 

  

Tonya Kubo (18:50.286) 

Abby is all about popcorn, popcorn chips. She likes the salty stuff. Lily just wants chocolate. If Lily can have a buffet of chocolate, maybe a little gelato tub, that would make her very happy. She likes a charcuterie. She’s a big fan of a charcuterie too. Yes, yes. 

  

Kathi (18:52.739) 

Yeah. Yeah. 

  

Kathi (19:00.387) 

Kathi (19:03.883) 

Okay. Yes. see, I love all these ideas. This is amazing. Yes. Yeah, they do not have cheap taste. They get that from their father and their mom in some in some regards. Yeah, you know, for us, you know, I think this is an adult thing. Like if I declutter, I can go to bed early and be in a decluttered room and moose and I can snuggle. 

  

Tonya Kubo (19:09.984) 

My kids are bougie though. They just are. 

  

Tonya Kubo (19:15.434) 

No. Right. 

  

Kathi (19:32.675) 

and it’s the best thing ever. And so that makes me super happy. Like that gives me joy, joy, joy down in my heart. And so I love that. I love that idea about that. Okay. So guys, if this is sounding appealing to you, if you need a little bit of accountability, you want to know more, you know, feel. 

  

Tonya Kubo (19:34.132) 

Yup. 

  

Kathi (19:57.411) 

like you’re being rewarded for this, but you also just know that part of the reward is living in a clutter-free house. If you are willing to get rid of some of that stuff in your house permanently, so you never have to revisit it again, I just wonder if Clutter-free for life might be for you. is, Tonya, tell them a little bit about Clutter-Free for life and how they’ll know if it’s for them. 

  

Tonya Kubo (20:26.668) 

Yeah, so, my gosh, I love Clutter-Free For Life as anybody who listens to this show should know by now. So, you Clutter-Free For Life is for the person who is like, you know, enough is enough. Like I’ve tried to do this on my own and it hasn’t been successful for me because I believe that we do have people in Clutter-Free Free For Life who genuinely would succeed with the membership or without it. They just… 

  

Kathi (20:29.589) 

I know, I do too. Yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (20:52.914) 

know that they are happier in the process by having community around them. But, you know, for most of us, and I’m thinking of me, I’m thinking of Grace Church who’s over there, if you’ve tried it by yourself and you haven’t been successful and you’re like, you know, there’s just something like I can get it to a place, but I can’t get it beyond that, or I can’t keep it that way, Clutter-Free for Life is designed specifically for that. It’s designed for the person who needs a little extra support. 

  

Kathi (20:55.833) 

Yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (21:20.236) 

Maybe the person who doesn’t have anybody in their life who understands how hard it is to actually release clutter and to keep things decluttered and they want somebody or would like to have somebody who shares those small wins like, hey, I just decluttered this one drawer. Clutter-free for life is perfect for that person in addition to those people who actually need a plan. And our plans are flexible. They work no matter how big or how small your house is. 

  

They work if you live with other people or if you have your own space, you can rent, can own. We’ve made it a very flexible plan, but it is something, at least you wake up that day knowing what part of the house to focus on and what to do when you’re there. 

  

Kathi (22:05.269) 

And we see such huge success stories over in Clutter-Free for Life. It’s inspiring. 

  

Tonya Kubo (22:10.858) 

We do. And you know what, what’s funny is what some, each person when they say is like, this is what changed everything for me. It’s always different. You know, for some it’s the weekly coaching session. And it’s not because we like boss them around, right? But it’s because they get to show up. They get to look around and go, Hey, I’m not the only one who struggles. There’s, know, 10 people on this call, 20 people on this call who have the same struggle. We talk through. 

  

Kathi (22:21.54) 

Yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (22:38.412) 

like what works for us. Like I just got a great tip from somebody last week during a coaching session that’s totally changed our kitchen. And it was, my gosh. So shout out to Natasha, who’s in Clutter-Free for Life. We were talking about like ways to organize small spaces like bathrooms and stuff where you don’t have closets. And the idea came up, the little shoe boxes like the Sterilite plastic shoe boxes with the lid are a great way if you… 

  

Kathi (22:46.031) 

Do tell! You have to tell! 

  

Kathi (22:51.019) 

I love Natasha. Yeah. 

  

Kathi (23:03.471) 

Yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (23:06.4) 

if you have things that are just like lots of odds and ends that get lost in a drawer, well, what it made me think of is like, I have appliances that have lots of pieces. So think of like your food processor has all those things that come with it and you’re always looking for a random piece. So I was like, what if we got these shoe boxes and I put all my meat grinder attachments in one and I put all my food processor things in another and we have our sushi-making stuff in another. 

  

Kathi (23:17.219) 

Yeah, right. 

  

Kathi (23:28.495) 

Yeah, yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (23:35.038) 

And it all stacks beautifully all modularly in a little cupboard. But I’m not having to dig through drawers and go, well, this is kind of an odd shape. So it goes here and this is really tiny. So it goes there. And Brian was super excited, right? Because Brian was just like, my gosh, now I just have to pull out that one little box and everything I need is going to be in. 

  

Kathi (23:50.277) 

It’s amazing. 

  

Kathi (23:57.943) 

It’s you know, I have that kind of system, but it’s under my stairs in the Harry Potter closet where Yes, where you just have these these tubs that pull out and all my quazen art stuff is there and yeah It’s such a good idea. Yes, absolutely Well guys, you know the thing I love the most about clutter-free for life is we’re supporting people not just in their decluttering but that decluttering 

  

Tonya Kubo (24:03.456) 

I love the Harry Potter closet though. 

  

Tonya Kubo (24:08.396) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (24:11.991) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi (24:26.797) 

is the undergirding to so much more in their lives. It’s the undergirding to buying less because you can find stuff in your closet. It’s the undergirding to paying your bills on time. It’s the undergirding to cooking more because your kitchen is not in chaos. And we have a sale going on right now that this runs through December 10th. 

  

Tonya Kubo (24:30.136) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (24:43.48) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Kathi (24:54.981) 

Clutter-Free for life is 2.99 a year, but if you buy it on this sale for, know, before December 10th, you can get it for $118. It’s a huge discount because we love to have everybody kind of come in at the same time. It saves us a lot of time and energy and that’s how we support it. And we would love to have you join us today. 

  

You can go to the link in these show notes or if you just go to Kathi Lipp’s Clutterfree Academy, know, look over there. We’re going to have all sorts of information about it over there. So, and if you have questions, feel free to ask us questions over there because we would love to be able to support you in that. Tonya, what’s one thing you would like to encourage people with if they’re kind of on the fence about this? 

  

Tonya Kubo (25:32.685) 

Mm-hmm. 

  

Tonya Kubo (25:47.086) 

if they’re on the fence, they just need to reach out to me. Seriously, just talk to me. I would say, you know, my email address is tonya@kathilipp.org. They can get information @kathi.link/CFL. But honestly, let’s just have a conversation. What I love about our community is we’ve got members. I mean, they’ll tell you like what they love. They’ll tell you what was hard for them when they started. They’ll tell you why they stay. 

  

Kathi (25:50.147) 

Okay. 

  

Kathi (26:02.297) 

Yeah. 

  

Tonya Kubo (26:16.766) 

We’re very honest because the truth is it doesn’t benefit us if it’s not a good fit for you either So we just want to see you. I mean, I would love to have you try it We do a 30-day guarantee. So we’ll give you your money back within 30 days if it’s not for you, but if You’re looking around and you’re like I want to live differently and I just don’t quite know how to do that day-to-day I really would encourage you to check us out. 

  

Kathi (26:22.584) 

It’s so true. 

Tonya Kubo

Thanks for having me.

 

Kathi (26:41.925)

Tonya, thanks so much. And friends, thank you for being here. You’ve been listening to Clutter-Free Academy. I’m Kathi Lipp. Now, go create the clutter-free life you’ve always wanted to live.

 

  

 

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#645 Reclaiming Your Space: Your First Steps to a Clutter-Free Life

#645 Reclaiming Your Space: Your First Steps to a Clutter-Free Life

645 – Reclaiming Your Space: Your First Steps to a Clutter-Free Life

Hey there, friends! Have you ever struggled with an overwhelming burden of household clutter?

There is hope!

In this episode of the Clutter Free Academy podcast, hosts Kathi Lipp and Tonya Kubo dive deep into the challenges of managing household clutter and offer practical solutions to help listeners reclaim their spaces and find peace. They discuss the emotional toll that clutter can take. They share personal stories of their own clutter battles, including Tonya’s experience of renting dumpsters multiple times per year to clear out excess items.

Listeners will discover:

  • Research that shows cluttered homes can contribute to chronic stress and depression in mothers.
  • The importance of “pre-deciding”
  • How to create clutter-busting routines
  • The difference between their free Clutter Free Academy community and the more intensive Clutter Free for Life membership

By the end of the episode, listeners will be inspired to take the first steps towards a clutter-free life, whether that means joining the Clutter Free for Life program or simply implementing 15-minute daily decluttering routines.

A big shout out to CF4L member Natasha Berridge for the before and after pics used in the title graphics!

Click here to be notified when the next podcast episode is released!

Also, stay up to date and sign up here to receive our newsletter.

 

Join Clutter Free For Life

While Clutter Free for Life comes with a plan of action to keep you moving forward in your decluttering journey day after day, the true magic of this membership program is in the community. It’s a program FOR cluttery people BY cluttery people.

It’s a family of cluttery people who want better for themselves and for you. We all understand the emotional weight of clutter and the physical barriers it causes. Clutter Free for Life members have a team of experts who know what it’s like to feel overwhelmed as their guides. Want to see whether the membership is right for you? Check out our info page Clutter Free For Life.

What are some of the biggest triggers that tend to cause clutter build-up in your home? 

Share in the comments!

Let’s stay connected

To share your thoughts:

  • Leave a note in the comment section below.
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Meet Our Guest 

 

Tonya Kubo

Tonya Kubo is the illustrious and fearless leader of Kathi Lipp’s Clutter Free Academy Facebook group and the Clutter Free for Life membership program. A speaker and writer, Tonya makes her home in the heart of California with her husband, Brian, their two spirited daughters, and one very tolerant cat. Visit her at www.tonyakubo.com.

Tonya Kubo Picture
Transcript
Kathi (00:01.794)

Well, hey friends, welcome to Clutter Free Academy, where our goal is to help you take small, doable steps to live every day with less clutter and more life. And I am here with my co-clutter warrior, it’s Tonya Kubo. Hey, Tonya.

Tonya Kubo (00:15.794)

Hey, Kathi.

Kathi (00:17.95)

Okay, so this may sound like the basic of basic podcasts, but I think when people get overwhelmed by clutter, we do have to go back to the basics because you know that one of my pet peeves is somebody says, I’m gonna do your clutter program. I’m like, awesome, but I’m also doing Marie Kondo’s and I’m also doing the fly lady, and I’m also doing.

I’m like, please leave me out of this. Because what cluttery people tend to do is we tend to take the easiest part or the most attractive part from each system. Then we don’t understand why. Because let’s be honest, every system has their hard part.

Tonya Kubo (01:00.263)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (01:11.859)

Yes, that is 100 % true.

Kathi (01:15.584)

And so I wanna talk about why you may be completely overwhelmed right now when it comes to clutter. We’re recording this when Halloween is on its way out, Thanksgiving and Christmas are on their way in. I was just at, where was I? I was at Walmart and the amount of real estate that is dedicated to

Tonya Kubo (01:24.083)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (01:45.23)

I shouldn’t be surprised. I shouldn’t be surprised if we start to see Christmas in July.

Tonya Kubo (01:48.177)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (01:53.317)

Yeah, no, I have something to say about that because so we walked into Lowe’s like a week ago and Abby started cackling, and I was like, what? And she’s like, look at that, mom. And they had like an aisle of Halloween decorations. And of course, it’s Lowe’s, so it’s a lot of yard stuff. And it’s facing this whole section of Christmas. And it looks like Halloween is facing off with Christmas because it’s like,

Kathi (02:12.771)

Yeah.

Tonya Kubo (02:22.291)

a blow-up Santa, like an inflatable Santa, opposite an animatronic Grim Reaper. But it didn’t look like, my gosh, it looked like from like Lord of the Rings when they’re like facing off before the big war. And I had to take a picture of it because it was funny. I’ll have to post that to social. But yeah, Abby was just like, this is so funny. It’s like the war for Christmas.

Kathi (02:28.909)

my goodness.

Kathi (02:41.549)

Yeah.

Kathi (02:47.66)

Yeah, and fall is my favorite time of year. And I’m like, let me just enjoy fall. But the Christmas stuff is out. Well, I can’t even imagine what the temperature is where you’re at right now. But it’s still 100 degrees here. Yeah. Yeah, it’s just gross. Okay. But if we start to talk about Christmas and the holidays, there’s some anxiety over that. And you’re like, my house isn’t ready. And you want to do a deep dive.

Tonya Kubo (03:00.711)

yeah, same. Yeah, same.

Tonya Kubo (03:11.091)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (03:16.206)

on all the clutter in your house, but there just doesn’t feel like there’s time. So we’re gonna try a bunch of patch-it solutions. Like, I’m just gonna stick this pile of papers here for now. But I’ll totally remember where it is when I need to dig out that tax bill or whatever it is. And then, you know, we…

Tonya Kubo (03:28.839)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (03:34.064)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (03:38.9)

unearth all these memories, having to apologize for the state of our home, telling people don’t open that closet. For me, a long time, I felt like I had to take people out instead of having them over because my house wasn’t in a state where I could entertain people. But then when I take them out, because it was my idea, I felt like I had to pay. You know, there’s a real financial cost.

Tonya Kubo (03:54.087)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (04:04.327)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (04:08.056)

To clutter. Rebuying things. I don’t know if that’s ever been something you’ve had to do, Tonya, but I can’t find the cupcake liners that I bought two weeks ago, so I need to go buy more Valentine cupcake liners or Christmas.

Tonya Kubo (04:09.501)

Yeah.

Tonya Kubo (04:25.971)

That comes up, actually, that is a very acute common pain point in our Facebook group and Clutterfree Academy. Very common, both from a, I need this thing. I know I bought it. It’s somewhere around here. I can’t find it. I’m trying not to go out and buy it, right? To, holy cow, I thought I bought these things and now I just found where I stashed them.

Kathi (04:33.166)

Hmm

Tonya Kubo (04:54.713)

after I just bought them all over again.

Kathi (04:56.128)

Of course. Yes. I’m the person who will leave little notes for myself on my calendar. Like I leave breadcrumbs to say, this is where this thing is. And I leave, I leave also little hints in September. Do not buy Christmas wrap. You have plenty, Kathi. You know, do not buy tape or ribbons or

Tonya Kubo (05:02.3)

Yeah

Tonya Kubo (05:18.555)

Yes.

Kathi (05:23.35)

The little car like you don’t need any of that stuff. But also I know that one of the things that is the most clutter-producing are events and change. Tonya, you know, I live a pretty clutter-free life. We are not we are not by any means picture-perfect all the time. But this week I’m like, Roger, what has happened to our lives?

Tonya Kubo (05:33.511)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (05:41.213)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (05:50.808)

What has happened to our lives? Why is there so much stuff? Like our house was looking pretty good a week ago and kaboom. And he said, well, remember last week we had nine people living in our house. And I’m like, yeah, but I recovered from that. And he goes, yeah, but you launched a book on Tuesday. Like any time there’s this big event, even though it doesn’t feel like it should be so cluttery.

Tonya Kubo (05:57.203)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (06:03.687)

Right, you had to retreat.

Tonya Kubo (06:09.447)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (06:17.352)

things get left out, things get missed. Anytime that our patterns are interrupted, it’s harder and that is what the holidays are. Yes, so we talk about, know, how anything, have you had any of these things in your household in the past three months? Disaster, we’re recording this right about the time.

Tonya Kubo (06:26.213)

Mm-hmm. That is very true.

Kathi (06:41.588)

as we’ve just had major hurricanes go through a large part of the country. You we’ve had two. One specifically working its way through Florida right now. Sickness, the Kubo household, the plague befell you.

Tonya Kubo (06:47.187)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (06:55.013)

my gosh, it has been a year and then some. And you know, it’s not that far in the school year, but yes, plague.

Kathi (07:01.51)

Yes. A death in the family or close friends, you know, that is a major upheaval. Moving. I never want to move again. I want to be buried out in the North 40. Like I never want to move again. And then also we have a lot of our friends who are in Clutter-free for Life and Clutterfree Academy who deal with challenges with their mental health, whether it’s depression, ADHD,

Tonya Kubo (07:27.261)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (07:30.19)

We have a lot of people who are working through some of those challenges.

Tonya Kubo (07:33.585)

Yeah, well I would say actually, to be more accurate, it’s health issues. We see that all the time in Clutterfree Academy, the free group, right? When you join the group, you’re asked to answer several questions. And one is, what gets in the way of you and your decluttering goals? And one of the choices is health issues. And all the, like that gets picked probably five out of 10 times every single week. It’s health issues.

Kathi (07:38.988)

Yeah. Yes.

Kathi (07:49.646)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (08:01.489)

get in the way of my best efforts. And then we see a larger percentage of those individuals in Clutter Free for Life, a paid membership program, because quite honestly, they do not have the physical, mental or emotional bandwidth to decide what to do next. And so they join our paid program. So we do the decision-making for them. But yeah, I would say that those health issues, mental and physical, is a major barrier for our people. Major barrier.

Kathi (08:22.04)

Great.

Kathi (08:30.794)

So I want to give some really practical tools, whether it’s health issues, chaos in your family, sickness, whatever that is. What are some really practical things that we can do as we’re fighting clutter in our lives? And I think you just hit on such a huge one, that pre-deciding. Tell me, Tonya, how you’ve seen that live out in our groups that

Pre-deciding has helped them with this clutter battle.

Tonya Kubo (09:04.783)

Yeah, well, how many examples can I give you? Because I have a lot, Kathi, and this will help me prioritize in my brain. Say three, three. OK, I can do three. So the first one. So if you’ve been listening to the podcast for any length of time, you know that our clutter. Not it’s not 100 percent accurate, right, because context matters in many cases, but in general, the reasons behind our clutter fall into two areas.

Kathi (09:07.884)

Hahaha!

Kathi (09:12.206)

let’s say three. Three is good.

Tonya Kubo (09:34.637)

One is the acquisition of stuff, the amount of stuff that comes into our home. The other is in minimizing the stuff. You’re the one who taught me, Kathi, you must minimize before you organize, right? So that is getting the stuff out of the home. And I refer to that as managing the ebb and flow of stuff in our home or managing the ebb and flow of our possessions. And some people quite honestly struggle on both ends of that. I don’t know what you call that.

both ends of the relationship with clutter. And so in pre-deciding, one of the most powerful decisions I’ve seen made, and we’ve got one member and she has given me permission to talk about her publicly. Her name is Jackie. You know, she struggles with both sides. Yeah, both ends of the spectrum are hard for her, but she made a decision the first of this year that involved the acquisition of stuff. She was gonna really focus.

Kathi (10:05.261)

right.

Kathi (10:18.05)

We love Jackie. We love Jackie.

Tonya Kubo (10:30.931)

on minimizing how much came into her home. And one of those decisions meant that if she got a message from somebody, because she’s part of like by nothing groups and sort of these restoration groups, if somebody gave sent her a message of like, my gosh, there’s this incredible whatever over here on the side of the road, she was gonna say, you know what, I can’t think of anything to do with that. I’m gonna have to pass.

She pre-decided that, you know, she knows what days of the week people tend to put stuff out on the curb. She made, she pre-decided that she was not going to drive down certain streets on those days during those times of days because she knew early in the year, she knew she wasn’t going to be able to pass by certain things. She just knew it, right? Like if I pass by that, if I see a thing like that, it’s going in my truck.

Kathi (11:02.67)

Yeah.

Tonya Kubo (11:22.043)

and it’s going in my garage because in my mind, if I put it in my truck, I save it from a landfill. I don’t have the self-control to say no, but what I do have the self-control to do is not drive in that part of town on that day of the

Kathi (11:36.293)

my goodness, I had not heard this story. That is amazing. I’m so proud of her.

Tonya Kubo (11:41.095)

So, I am proud, Kathi, I could weep, and you know I’m not that emotional of a person, but I could weep daily over the growth that I see in our members because the thing is, is I remember it all. I remember them when they first joined. They don’t remember how far they’ve come. So the first thing I would say is, previous society, think of what Jackie did. Can you make a decision involving your routine?

Kathi (11:57.698)

Right.

Tonya Kubo (12:08.977)

that eliminates five other decisions. Because that’s a big one. The other thing I would say is, know, meal planning. It’s so funny. We are not a food group. We cannot sell you meal plans. don’t, well, we can sell you Sabbath soup, which has meal plans. But if you join Color Free Academy, I don’t have meal plans in there to sell you. I’m sorry. But, you know.

Kathi (12:13.614)

Yeah.

Kathi (12:25.656)

Yes, please.

Kathi (12:31.33)

Right.

Tonya Kubo (12:34.759)

The idea of a meal plan, of pre-deciding this is what we’re eating every day, prevents over buying a food, which prevents food waste. It does so much to save time at the end of the day when you’re tired and your energy is often at the lowest. And so by pre-deciding what you’re gonna eat, we’ve seen this in our house particularly. If I know what we’re having for dinner, I know exactly when to get started in the kitchen cooking and…

Because I’ve made so many mental decisions, I still have physical energy to clean up the kitchen after we eat.

Kathi (13:10.35)

Tonya, I really do think that meals need to become a bigger part of what we do in Clutterfree for Life. It’s just, it’s, you know, every day I spend about 15 minutes doing something towards my meal plan. You know, on Mondays I make my menu, on Tuesdays I make my shopping list and I order my groceries, on Wednesdays pick them up, Thursdays prep.

Tonya Kubo (13:20.101)

yes, definitely.

Tonya Kubo (13:28.761)

Mm hmm. Yeah.

Kathi (13:39.63)

You know, doing all those vegetables, you know, everything that involves a quiz and art or I pre-ground some meat or something like that. then Friday and Saturday I cook. It makes such a so I spend about 15 minutes doing that and I spend about 15 minutes decluttering every day. And then I, you know, specific rooms, you know, Monday I’m doing my kitchen Tuesday, I’m doing my living room. And then I spent about 15 minutes doing some kind of cleaning.

Tonya Kubo (13:40.723)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (13:57.767)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (14:08.822)

That is a little above and beyond and just by making those three decisions and those decisions are Predecisions like this is what I’m doing and this is what I’m going to do It’s changed the rhythm of my home. It’s made such a difference Tonya, I want to come back And I want to talk to the women You know, we have some guys who are here. We’re welcome, but you know what? I’m just going to be honest

Tonya Kubo (14:11.059)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (14:24.409)

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Kathi (14:39.086)

we are talking to women here because we have different kinds of pressures and different kinds of things we do and I want to talk about For the woman who feels perpetually behind Who just feels like she can’t catch up. We’re gonna come back and have some really practical solutions for you So stay tuned we’re gonna pay some bills and we’ll be right back

Tonya Kubo (14:51.495)

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (15:03.104)

Okay, friends, we are back. I’m back with Tonya Kubo, who is not only our co-host, but the leader of all things clutter-free. And I just want to talk about what are the emotional tolls of clutter. You know that I often refer to this UCLA study that says, first of all, one in 11 Americans have so many possessions that they are currently paying for

storage space outside their home. Now this study is 10 years old at least 10 years old, and They haven’t stopped building storage units There are more storage unit businesses in the United States than there are McDonald’s and Subways combined that’s a lot. That is a lot and

Tonya Kubo (15:33.639)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (15:40.306)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (15:52.445)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (15:57.501)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (16:00.462)

In 2009, UCLA found that mothers who described their homes as cluttered, they self-described, they self-identified that their homes are cluttered, have a stress hormone profile indicative of chronic stress. And chronic stress, left untreated, turns into a chronic illness. That is the path. When you are constantly stressed, when you constantly feel your heart racing when you constantly feel

Tonya Kubo (16:09.127)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (16:30.612)

These things and these moms also tended to have more depressed moods throughout the day. Like clutter is affecting our mental health. It is making us sad and depressed. They’re more tired in the evenings. And I think about this. So, Tonya, I am no longer in the thick of it. I do not have kids at my house. When kids come to my house, what they do is they come by to steal food, steal wine.

Tonya Kubo (16:38.332)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (16:52.231)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (16:59.424)

and then go to their friends’ parties in Lake Tahoe. That’s what my kids do when they come to that. But you’re in the thick of it. Describe to me what your house feels like when it’s clear because you had a real clutter issue when your kids were little.

Tonya Kubo (16:59.795)

You

Tonya Kubo (17:08.519)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (17:18.355)

Yes, and because my kids are growing up, we still have clutter issues. They look different, right? I’ve I share this and I’ve been teaching in Clutter-Free for Life recently and I share this with them all the time. It’s like there is always one part of my house that I feel like is absolutely out of control. The difference is, is that in 2014, when I discovered Clutter-Free for Life, or actually 2015, it was my whole house, right? And so now

Kathi (17:23.924)

Right. Yeah.

Kathi (17:37.165)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (17:46.582)

Right. Right.

Tonya Kubo (17:48.207)

I have just accepted that in this phase of life, one part of the house being constantly chaotic is still growth and a win compared to where I used to be.

Kathi (17:59.182)

Tonya, Tonya, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Is still growth?

Tonya Kubo (18:05.253)

It is still growth!

Kathi (18:07.522)

This is such a huge victory, friend. I know it may not feel as different, but what you have done for your kids and for your own mental health is indescribable. It’s huge.

Tonya Kubo (18:10.972)

you

Tonya Kubo (18:18.024)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (18:22.937)

Yes, and it is a victory, but like we say in clutter free, right? It’s not one and done. It never is, right? So many people think, like, if I could just take a whole week off of work and get my house completely decluttered, it’ll be fine. I’ll never have to do it again. And I just feel like it’s so important to point out that for some of us, the goal is to just be better than we were when we started and to be on the path to be better a year from now than where we are right now.

Kathi (18:27.991)

Right, 100%.

Tonya Kubo (18:51.827)

constant state of improvement.

Kathi (18:51.98)

So Tonya, when you were first working the clutter free program, how often were you renting a dumpster?

Tonya Kubo (18:57.704)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (19:02.609)

Well, I had never rented one before we started, but that was like when we recognized we had no space. So we rented one, we could get one. I remember we could get one at a special deal once every three months. And so that’s what we did. The first year was four times. The second year was three times. And then we went to twice a year for a good chunk of years, maybe three years, until we bought this house.

Kathi (19:06.371)

Right?

Yeah.

Kathi (19:25.87)

For a long time, yeah.

Tonya Kubo (19:29.383)

We bought this house and we got one and that’s when they doubled the price. I was not happy, Kathi, at all. They doubled the price. We got one and then we kind of looked and we were like, we had enough for one dump because the way that our town had done it at the time is you would rent it for a month or four empties. And so initially we were filling it four times and then it went to where we’d fill it only like two to three.

Kathi (19:35.498)

I agree.

Kathi (19:48.941)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (19:53.004)

Mmm.

Tonya Kubo (19:56.775)

but that last time we actually did not have enough stuff to fill it once. It was still worthwhile because I still truly appreciate having the immediate free space, but it was huge progress. But what I want to also say is, you when we talk about stress and clutter, if you hear nothing else in this episode, this is what you need to hear. Yes, clutter causes stress and stress causes clutter.

Kathi (20:01.87)

That’s amazing.

Kathi (20:07.874)

Yes.

Kathi (20:24.42)

Yes, ex- go-

Tonya Kubo (20:25.507)

It goes both ways. I don’t want anybody listening to be like, well I’m stressed out because I’m failing at my decluttering because it is the most vicious cycle ever. And it’s one that I am living right now. Now it’s not throughout my whole house, but it’s my desk. So I am in a period of travel, which I don’t love doing during the school year. And when I cannot contain all that I have to do, I start writing everything on sticky notes and color coding them. And I,

I stick the sticky notes all around my, I kid you not, 27 inch monitor. And then when I have filled the edges of my monitor, I start just sticking them in random places all over my desk. And there was a point in time last week where you couldn’t see my desk because there were so many sticky notes of things. Now I will tell you this week, super empowering to be able to get rid of a stack of sticky notes every single day before I go to bed.

Kathi (21:12.504)

Yeah.

Kathi (21:20.258)

Nice So Tonya here’s what I would say too because I don’t want anybody to join us in the free group or potentially be in the clutter free for life group and think This is how I get my house perfect because let me be honest with you I Would still like ten more minutes before somebody comes over like I but but I don’t need

Tonya Kubo (21:45.299)

Amen. Brian would like 10 to 14 business days if you could arrange that for him. That would be his preference.

Kathi (21:55.384)

But here’s the thing, Tonya, and we’ve had this happen before, where friends have been in crisis and they need a place to sleep. And I say, come on down. And we can do that. You can’t do that because you have no room in your house.

Tonya Kubo (22:03.581)

Mm-hmm. Yup.

Tonya Kubo (22:09.381)

I was gonna say I only have as many beds as I have people in this house and well that oftentimes one of us is on the couch.

Kathi (22:17.452)

Yeah, but if somebody needs to come over and grab something to make their dinner, you could let them into your house and you can do that. And that’s the big difference, my friends, you know, that I live in a space that doesn’t stress me out every time I come downstairs. And I, you know, right now my garage is organized like, you know, miracles abound friend. Okay.

Tonya Kubo (22:21.139)

Mm-hmm.

yeah. Yeah.

Tonya Kubo (22:34.973)

Mm-hmm.

Tonya Kubo (22:41.405)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (22:49.27)

You know, we’ve talked a little bit about Clutterfree Academy, which is our free group that everybody is welcome into. You have to answer a few questions so we know that you’re not trying to one, try to teach other people because you were born organized and you know how to do it because we reject you in the name of Jesus Christ.

Tonya Kubo (23:08.347)

I will say this one more time, we are the kindest quarter of the internet except for that particular type of person.

Kathi (23:14.4)

Yes, yes. But also, we have our Clutter Free for Life group. here’s something I’ve been thinking about recently, Tonya, and a way I’m going to start teaching it in Clutter Free for Life. There are a lot of organization programs out there. And those programs are like

trimming your rose bushes, trimming your plants, like they may look good for a while, but you’re not getting to the root of the problem. And yeah, yeah. No.

Tonya Kubo (23:58.557)

Well, that’s the ultimate issue, isn’t it, Kathi? Please continue. But I mean, that really is the heart of it, is so many initiatives we have tried to solve our problem of clutter is bandaging a deeply infected wound.

Kathi (24:14.966)

Yeah. Yes. And what I want to do is I want you to get to the root of this problem. I want you to get to the place where you are pulling that rose bush that is not producing great roses anymore, but you keep trimming it and hoping it’ll come back and no, we’re just going to pull it out by the roots. And that’s what clutter free for life does, because what we want you to do is we want you to spend

Tonya Kubo (24:39.111)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (24:45.526)

Few minutes 15 minutes every day getting to the root of the issue and that means getting the stuff out of your house getting it out of your space because if You get it out. You never have to deal with that particular item again But if you keep it and organize it and put it into a folder or buy a plastic tub for it You’re gonna have to reorganize it and reorganize it and reorganize it

Tonya Kubo (24:55.324)

Yes.

Tonya Kubo (25:04.167)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (25:15.65)

Dozens of times and if you’re not going to use it, it’s time to remove it

Tonya Kubo (25:21.091)

Mm-hmm. 100%.

Kathi (25:22.766)

So, Tonya, can you explain a little bit of the difference between Clutter-Free Academy, our free group, and Clutter-Free for Life, which is our paid group? And let’s just be honest, we’re doing this podcast because we want to introduce, some of you just need the band-aid every once in a while. But most of the people who are searching out, decluttering, those kind of terms,

Tonya Kubo (25:30.685)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (25:52.65)

on Facebook looking for that kind of help often need deeper help and that’s what clutter free for life does.

Tonya Kubo (25:56.903)

Mm-hmm.

Okay, well, I could fill four episodes with everything that is involved in our Clutterfree Academy program and our Clutterfree for Life membership program. But here’s what I’m gonna do is I’m gonna give you some differences from the perspective of Grace Church. She is the community manager of our Clutterfree for Life, our membership program. And she just says it so well.

First things first, the free group is huge, depending on your relation with size. But it’s inching up towards 16,000 members now. And so it’s huge. So if you are the type of person that really feels like you are all alone in the world, you are the only person who has clutter, you’re the only person who hasn’t figured out how to get on top of your stuff, please by all means come into the free group and see that you have.

roughly about 15,900 close personal friends who also think they’re the only person in the world. If you need to know you’re in good company, by all means go there. If you are somebody who likes a big, busy group, lots of activity, talking about all sorts of different things, all that fall within the spectrum of clutter, Clutterfree Academy is a great place for you. And if you have just like one or two questions about clutter,

Kathi (26:59.977)

Right.

Tonya Kubo (27:21.841)

Like, my gosh, my mom just passed away. We’ve got this milk glass and we have no idea what one does with milk glass. Who here knows? We’re pretty good resource for that kind of thing, too. Excellent resource. However, if you are somebody who prefers a smaller, more intimate group that is action oriented because our free group has people, some people actually don’t believe they have any issue with clutter and they come into the group to prove

Kathi (27:31.381)

Excellent resource.

Tonya Kubo (27:51.461)

somebody in their life wrong, right? Somebody told them they were cluttering. They’re like, I’m not cluttering. I’m gonna go join this cluttering group and prove to you how uncluttery I am. Those folks are in there. Some folks are in there just because their clutter is situational. We get a lot of teachers, for instance, who are changing classrooms, changing jobs, and they’re just in there for some help in getting rid of some of the stuff that they’ve stockpiled. Clutter-free for life is for the person on a mission, right?

They know they have a clutter problem. nobody joins Clutter Free for Life because they’re curious on whether they have a clutter problem. They join because they know what? They have a problem. They want to be in company with other people doing, with the same shared goal, I should say, because not everybody is working on the same thing at the same time, but they all have the same mission. And they like more direct help.

Kathi (28:21.934)

Mm-hmm, right.

Tonya Kubo (28:42.577)

Some of our folks in Clutterfree Academy love the information we share. They binge this podcast. They go through, they pour through the website, but they are not ready to be visible yet, right? They don’t want Kathi to know what they look like. They don’t want Kathi to know them by name. Nobody’s scared of me. Everybody’s happy knowing me by name, but you know, Kathi, they really look to you as a mentor and as an expert. And so in Clutterfree for life is when they’re ready to be seen. We meet on zoom every single week.

Kathi (28:53.485)

Yeah.

You

Kathi (29:09.976)

Yeah.

every single week.

Tonya Kubo (29:12.741)

and we talk through these issues. Now there was a time where the calls on Zoom were just Q &A’s like, come and give us your clutter problems and we’ll answer. And what we have discovered is our people do not appreciate that. They come, they want us to pre-decide, they want us to look at what’s going on, what the theme is, and let them know what’s most important for them to know to take immediate action, and then support them in whatever obstacles are along the way. And so to do all that,

We have a calendar with a day-to-day decluttering plan for you. We do separate it in monthly themes because we have been at this long enough, Kathi Lipp has been at this longer than me, but we’ve been at this longer enough to know those rhythms and routines of where clutter rears its ugly head most often. And honestly, we’re just the nicest stinking people you could ever hope to be with our members. Like I get emotional every time I lead one of our weekly calls.

because they are so generous and so kind and so giving. And there is nobody who will ever answer your question with a, well, what you gotta do is, because all of us are aware that we are no more of an expert on the solution than you are, but we are experts on the journey.

Kathi (30:31.02)

Yes. And it is a journey. It takes time. This is not, like you said, a one and done. This is constantly keeping up on it and reframing how you think about your stuff. That’s a lot of what we do is help you reframe how you think about the things. Because many of us were raised by parents that if you give it away, that means you’re wasteful. Or, you know, that we have these tapes in our head.

that we don’t need to keep. And so we really try to give every, we lend each other our bravery to be able to say, you can get rid of it, it’s gonna be okay. Or, hey, you may need to hold onto that for another three months until you are ready to get rid of it. But in the meantime, here are the other things you can do. So friends, Clutter Free for Life, you can join it any time of the year. It’s 299.

Tonya Kubo (31:25.043)

Mm-hmm.

Kathi (31:27.63)

for the entire year or $24.99 per month or right now we’ve got a sale going on and we do this because we want you to be able to try this out and you guys it’s such a good sale it’s $118 for the entire year which is is pretty stunning

Tonya Kubo (31:30.163)

or $24.99 per month.

Kathi (31:55.022)

And you get all the same things that you get when you join at full price But I will say there is a limit to this because we have to hand process each of those ones So we are only offering this price through December 10th 2024 and You will be let into the group. You will get immediate access to our resources in there You’ll be able to look at all the past teaching. So if you’re like

I don’t have a lot going on for Christmas, then what you can do is you can start watching the videos. You can start being a part of the discussions. And can I just tell you this clutter free Academy is the kindest corner of the Internet. Clutter free for life is the kindest corner of the kindest corner of the Internet. You will never be shamed. You will never be said, you know, told, that’s what your house looks like because we’ve all been there.

Tonya and I were both raised by hoarders. My dad was a hoarder. Yeah, Tonya’s, my dad was a hoarder. Tonya’s mom was a hoarder. We get it, friends. We get that this, this is really hard, but we want you to be a part of it. So if you want to be a part of Clutter Free for Life, all you have to do is go to the show notes. We have a link there. It’s kathi.link/CFL and

Tonya Kubo (32:55.539)

Yeah, nothing ever surprises me. Nope.

Kathi (33:21.567)

You will get all the information you need. We would love for you to come and join. You can bring your clutter burdens to us. We will talk about it. Plus, you’re going to have hundreds of other people in there who have been through this journey and can give you the advice you need, not just the advice, the encouragement. So I want you to come check it out because it is a pretty spectacular place to be. Tonya, any final words of encouragement for our friends here?

Tonya Kubo (33:52.173)

You know what? It is not a personal failing to need help with your clutter. When I think back to a lot of our new members or a lot of the conversations I have with people in the free group who are thinking about joining the membership, what I hear a lot of is like, I should be able to do this, right? And I’m like, I’ve got a bachelor’s degree, a master’s degree and a whole lot of life experience and I need help.

Even if I wasn’t on the team, I’d be paying to be part of this group because I need the plan. I need to know what the next step is and I need support in getting there and it’s okay if you do too.

Kathi (34:31.63)

We need support from each other. We just need support from each other to continue on the journey. Tonya, thank you so much for your wisdom today. Friends, thank you for being here. You’ve been listening to ClutterFree Academy. I’m Kathi Lipp. Now, go create the clutter free life you’ve always wanted to live.

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#658 The All or Nothing Trap: Why Good Enough is Good Enough

#658 The All or Nothing Trap: Why Good Enough is Good Enough

In this episode of Clutter Free Academy, host Kathi Lipp is joined by her clutter buddy, Tonya Kubo, to tackle the all-too-common mindset of "if you can't do it right, don't do it at all". Together, they explore how this thinking impacts our homes and hearts, and...

#657 Rediscover Peace: The Psychological Benefits of Decluttering

#657 Rediscover Peace: The Psychological Benefits of Decluttering

In this episode of Clutter Free Academy, host Kathi Lipp is joined by Tonya Kubo to delve into the hidden costs of clutter and how it impacts our lives beyond the physical. They explore the emotional, spiritual, and financial toll that clutter can take and discuss...

#644 Meet the TikTok Star Making Saving Money on Food Cool Again

#644 Meet the TikTok Star Making Saving Money on Food Cool Again

644 – Meet the TikTok Star Making Saving Money on Food Cool Again

Hey friends!

You know how we’re always looking for ways to make our homes work better for us without breaking the bank?

We have a treat for you!

In this episode of Clutter Free Academy, Kathi Lipp interviews Lauren, a TikTok sensation known for her creative approaches to saving money on groceries. With a quarter million followers, Lauren shares her journey of feeding a family of seven while maintaining a tight grocery budget, as well as personal stories from her grandmother’s Depression-era cooking wisdom. She discusses how she manages to create meals using pantry cleanout items and creative substitutions.

Listeners will discover:

  • Lauren’s seven strategies for reducing grocery costs
  • The truth about expiration dates and food safety
  • How to effectively use Buy Nothing groups
  • Strategies for stretching ingredients
  • How to work around food allergies while staying on budget

Whether you’re dealing with a tight budget, wanting to waste less food, or just trying to be a better steward of what God’s given us, you’re going to love Lauren’s practical, down-to-earth approach.

Order your copy of Sabbath Soup here and sign up to receive your free ebook featuring four weeks’ worth of easy meal plans and delicious recipes.

Click here to be notified when the next podcast episode is released!

Also, stay up to date and sign up here to receive our newsletter.

 

Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest

Kathi Lipp gives readers an easy-to-follow process for meal planning and prep, so that they can enjoy a full day each week of real rest and refreshment.

Could you use a break from cooking (and everything else) once a week? Not only is rest vital for your mind and body, it’s good for your soul too. God designed us to enter into Sabbath rest one day per week, but as you know, meals still need to be made. Your family still needs to be fed.

Sabbath Soup includes convenient, seasonal meal plans that take the guesswork out of shopping and cooking. More than just a collection of delicious recipes—including main dishes, breads, breakfasts, desserts, salads, sides, and yes, soups—this is your guide to establishing a weekly rhythm and routine of meal planning and prep that allows you to have a true day off.

Do something good for your soul and experience the peace that comes with a full day dedicated to spending time with God, family, and friends. Savor your Sabbath as you proudly proclaim, “Soup’s on!”

Order your copy of Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest here.

Clutter Free Resources:

Join our Clutter Free Academy Facebook Group

Order Sabbath Soup here and sign up to receive your free ebook featuring four weeks’ worth of easy meal plans and delicious recipes.

What are your top tips for someone who wants to start stretching their grocery budget?

Share in the comments!

Let’s stay connected

To share your thoughts:

  • Leave a note in the comment section below.
  • Leave an honest review on iTunes. Your ratings and reviews really help and I read each one.

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Meet Our Guest

 

Lauren

Lauren is a TikTok creator with over 250,000 followers. She started making TikTok videos, primarily sharing her home-cooked meals and budget-friendly recipes, as a hobby rather than a career. Her straightforward, relatable video style and willingness to show the “outtakes” have resonated with her large audience.

Tonya Kubo Picture
Transcript
Kathi (00:02.168)

Well, hey friends, welcome to Clutter-Free Academy where our goal is to help you take small doable steps to live every day with less clutter and more life. Guys, you know, okay, I’m gonna sound like a fangirl here. You guys have heard me interview celebrities. You have heard me interview famous, famous authors.

But I am interviewing Lauren today and she’s going to get really embarrassed here. You guys, feel like I’m interviewing one of my friends, but she doesn’t know me. So here’s how I know Lauren. As you guys know, I kind of love me a little TikTok. It’s kind of my wind down every night after a busy day of content creation and writing. And Lauren is one of the first people who comes up, which, okay, I have to say,

Lauren (00:37.737)

Thank

Kathi (01:02.392)

One of the reasons she’s one of the first that comes up is she actually accepted a friend request one time. And I don’t do that. I don’t do that. So how I first started following Lauren is we have an epic battle in our house, my husband Roger and I, about use by and sell by dates. This is a battle to the death. I live on the edge. Like if it smells good and it tastes good, it is good.

Lauren (01:51.561)

Yes.

Kathi (01:56.574)

And Roger thinks that if a can of peaches is one day past its expiration date, that that may cause him botulism and he may die right here as I’m serving him peach cobbler. So I started watching you and I’m like, yes, somebody who is saying about this. And I started following your videos and they’re just delightful. They’re delightful. So I’m going to stop talking and I’m going to ask Lauren to talk.

Lauren (02:09.845)

Poor guy.

Lauren (02:17.691)

Thank

Kathi (02:25.365)

Lauren, welcome to Clutterfree Academy.

Lauren (02:27.841)

Thank you, Kathi.

Kathi (02:29.8)

And this is your first time ever on a podcast, even though you have a quarter of a million followers on TikTok. This is your first time on a podcast, right?

Lauren (02:38.055)

Yeah, I’m actually not big on social media. TikTok is pretty much the only social media I do. It just kind of happened.

Kathi (02:44.884)

Okay, let’s be clear, you’re huge on social media, you just have one form of it. So I’m just gonna, I am going to do a different podcast with you to talk about your TikTok journey, because I find that fascinating. But today, what I want to talk to you about is how you you are extreme when it comes to I think you’re extreme when it comes to saving money on your budget.

Would you call yourself extreme? Are you okay with that term?

Lauren (03:15.081)

I I feel I don’t feel like I’m extreme, but realistically, I probably am.

Kathi (03:19.768)

I was going to say, as the population goes, I would say you’re in the top 10 % of saving money on your budget. You are always looking for ways to save money on your budget. And so I tried to think out how many ways I have seen you save money on TikTok. And I just want to go over these because there’s about, I guess there’s seven that I have noticed.

Lauren (03:27.999)

Probably.

Kathi (03:46.748)

and I may be missing something. But I think the first video I ever saw was you using some ground beef that you traded for concrete work, right?

Lauren (03:59.488)

Yeah, I mean it was it wasn’t a straight-across trade, but it was a good portion of it. Yes

Kathi (04:05.022)

Okay, so you actually, your husband has a concrete company. And so what you did is you guys did this concrete work and part of the payment, was it a full cow? Was it half a cow? What was it?

Lauren (04:19.699)

It was a quarter cow, we traded for our labor portion.

Kathi (04:23.082)

Okay. And by the way, you have stretched that cow. Holy cow. Like you’ve made, I’ve seen you use that quite a bit. You’ve been able to use it quite a bit. So trading, have you ever done trades like that before? Is this your first time?

Lauren (04:38.365)

Not necessarily for the business, but we do trades all the time. You know, like my neighbors, we trade produce in the summer and she’ll leave me a big bouquet of flowers because I can’t grow flowers or, you know, we trade our land. People put their bees on it and they trade us honey for use of our land. We have all kinds of stuff like that.

Kathi (04:57.292)

That’s amazing. here’s a question, because I think people might feel awkward about asking, you know, would you be willing to trade? Can you give us just an idea of how you approach the subject or do you just hang out with people where this is kind of a way of life?

Lauren (05:14.837)

pretty normal in our community. We’re pretty rural. So a lot of us have more, you know, like food items than we do money. So plenty of us trade and it’s not a big deal. but we also, you know, if there’s something we’re super interested in sometimes just say, how would you feel about, know, we deduct a portion of this in exchange for this? And usually people are very open to it.

Kathi (05:22.54)

Yeah.

Kathi (05:36.386)

Yeah, and even if they can’t at that time, they may be open to it later on. For us, you know, we’ve done some trades and what I’ve noticed is the first thing to trade is something of small value if you’re like just kind of sussing out if somebody wants to do something. So like if we had extra chicken eggs, seeing if they might want to trade for some honey or something like that, and you know, getting your feet wet. But yeah, when you know you have something, especially when

Kathi (06:05.716)

egg prices were going through the roof, we could have traded them for bars of gold. It would not have mattered. Not that we could do anything with bars of gold, but yeah. Okay. So that was the first time I met you was finding out about the trade. But the reason I hung with you is the buy-nothing groups. So can you tell me a little bit about how you use buy nothing? And let’s talk a little bit about the extremes of your buy-nothing.

Lauren (06:10.209)

We kind of traded stuff off on that so come back.

Kathi (06:35.478)

Because you kind of don’t, when people do pantry cleanouts, you kind of don’t care. Well, you explain it, please.

Lauren (06:43.861)

The buy-nothing group is amazing. They’re actually all over the place and they’re specifically to Facebook. Well, I think they have a website that’s not, but they are everywhere. Some towns don’t have them, but people can create their own. There’s just a website. It’s, I think it’s like buy nothing.org that tells you kind of what they expect. So it’s sort of across the board. So it’s not like a need-based website. What it is is everybody has the exact same opportunity. If there’s stuff that you don’t want or aren’t going to use, you post it up there.

And you just let it sit for a day or two and let everybody that’s interested get a chance to say, Hey, I’m interested. You don’t really volunteer extra information. Like I could use this for, or I really need this because you just, I’m interested. And then they just randomly choose whoever they’re interested in gifting it to. So it’s cool. Cause everybody has the exact same opportunity. Nobody feels put on the spot. Nobody feels strange about it. And there’s a lot of things. mean, there’s clothes, there’s food items, there’s anything, anything in your house you would give to Goodwill. It goes on by nothing.

Kathi (07:43.04)

Okay, so I’m already finding out I did it wrong because I, we just had a big order at Sam’s and they, my husband went to pick it up and they accidentally included five gallons of two and a half percent milk, a bunch of Lunchables and some Romaine lettuce. And literally I just picked up 2 % milk and Romaine lettuce and I’m not a big Lunchables fan.

Lauren (07:59.777)

Wow.

Kathi (08:11.286)

So I put it up on our community group, because we live in such a small town, we don’t have a buy-nothing group. And I just gave it to the first person, but it was our school. So I feel good about that. But you’re kind of supposed to let a bunch of people leave it up for a couple of days and then pick somebody. Is that kind of the standard? Or can you give it away right away? Is that OK to do?

Lauren (08:30.606)

You can.

Lauren (08:35.421)

You can, yeah. People put like flash gift and like for example, last summer somebody cleaned out their freezer because they needed room and they had a picture of a bag on their porch with frozen stuff in it and just said, Hey, I cleaned out the freezer. Whoever can get here first can have it. And literally nobody commented on it, but me. So I ended up getting a big paper bag full of random, like the spinach I used in the spinach artichoke dip and peas and all kinds of stuff.

Kathi (09:01.058)

That’s amazing, I love it. Okay, so why are those pantry cleanouts so controversial? Because you get some pushback on them.

Lauren (09:09.757)

I get a lot of people that are really angry about the pantry pickups. Like there are so many people that are so angry, but I don’t know. I think it’s maybe the thought that like people think that I’m taking from somebody who needs it more. But like I explained, the buy-nothing group is everybody has the exact same chance and you just get randomly selected.

Kathi (09:12.812)

They’re mad at you, Lauren. How dare you? There are a couple of reasons, right? Yes.

Lauren (09:33.057)

But in our town, also have multiple, I think we’ve got like four churches that do food drives every single week. We’ve got our school that has a pantry twice a week. We’ve got a food bank. We’ve got so many resources in our community that nobody is lacking.

Kathi (09:48.46)

Yeah, and as somebody who gives things away when I don’t need them, we have a business here and we have to buy lots of food sometimes and sometimes there’s extra. And I just want what’s going to be convenient for me as I’m hosting all these people. Like we’ve got too much stuff. I just need the first person who could come here. And so there are lots of opportunities for people who are needs-based to get free food in our community.

Kathi (10:16.652)

but I’m just trying to manage my resources and get it out the door. The other reason that people get upset with you is because you take things past their expiration date and they think you’re going to die, right?

Lauren (10:31.297)

Yeah, a lot of the things that we get in pantry cleanouts are opened, which some things I feel comfortable using because I might know the people or I just, I don’t know, just get a wild hair and think it’s fine and use it. Anyway, a lot of people are like, aren’t you going to get poised? Yeah.

Kathi (10:44.072)

and you’re still here to talk about it. You are still here to talk about it.

Lauren (10:49.025)

Yeah, most people are good. They’re not out there trying to poison somebody randomly. I mean, they’re good-hearted enough to give away their extra. They’re probably not trying to kill you. And then the rest of it is just expired. Our food pantry can take up to a year, I think expired or maybe it’s six months past. It’s not very long, but everything else they just can’t give away to food pantries. And like we just used a can of soup from 2017 the other day, which freaked Devin out. He’s like, you try it first.

Kathi (10:57.942)

Right.

Kathi (11:17.367)

You

Lauren (11:18.45)

BOOF!

Kathi (11:19.926)

You’re the king’s food taster. I love that.

Lauren (11:22.305)

But you know, like I said in a million of my videos, mean, shelf stable foods are made to last. The USDA website even has a thing on it. I mean, it’s indefinite. The food is indefinite. It’s not going to stay tasting great, but it’s not going to kill you.

Kathi (11:40.396)

Well, Lauren, I wrote a book several years ago called Ready for Anything about being prepared for disasters and things like that. And that’s when I found out canned food almost doesn’t expire. It might lose a little of its flavor, but you’ve been trying to educate people on this. they’re staunch like if it’s a day past it on the box, I’m throwing it out. And I found out something really interesting.

You live north of me, I’m in California. And they are going to radically change the food date system in California. You heard about this, huh?

Lauren (12:21.217)

Well, I actually heard about Canada changing their food. They’re taking off the Best Buy dates.

Kathi (12:26.786)

Yes, because there’s so much food waste for people not sniffing or tasting, but just saying it’s a day past, I’m throwing it out. And the estimate is that Americans waste about 40 % of their food that they purchase. It’s crazy.

Lauren (12:43.133)

which is crazy. There are so many Americans that are hungry every day that don’t need to be because this stuff doesn’t need to be thrown away.

Kathi (12:49.674)

It does not need to be thrown away. Okay, the fourth way I’ve noticed that you are saving money on your food is gardening. say you can’t grow flowers. I’m very sad.

Lauren (13:04.863)

No, I am not a flower person or an indoor plant person.

Kathi (13:07.223)

Okay, that’s a hey, it’s good to know our strengths, right? It’s good to know what we’re able to do. But what do you grow that you feel like makes the biggest impact on your grocery bill?

Lauren (13:13.153)

Thanks.

Lauren (13:20.641)

the berries 100%. My kids, we have five boys. They, they just want berries. So we do strawberries, raspberries, blueberries, cherries. I mean, if it’s a fruit, we probably grow it. So that makes the biggest impact.

Kathi (13:32.728)

I’m surprised you didn’t say blackberries. Do you have blackberries on your land?

Lauren (13:38.323)

We do have blackberries. just, it’s not something you really try to grow in Oregon. They just kind of do their own thing and you try to rip them out constantly.

Kathi (13:44.696)

Yes. I was going to say we have a constant supply of blackberries, not necessarily ones we want, but yeah. Okay, so the berries are making the biggest, I think that’s really interesting. So, but you also grow a really big variety. I’ve seen beans and jalapenos and things like that. So what do you grow that adds the best flavor to your food? Like that you get excited about?

Lauren (14:12.885)

The potatoes are my favorite. I know they’re not a flavor item, but they’re my favorite. They’re so versatile.

Kathi (14:16.16)

Yes, because I tell people how you grow them.

Lauren (14:20.777)

Well, I’m actually I’m doing a video on it now, but I won’t post it until I’ve got like showing how it actually does. But so you use layering method. It’s really awesome. We do it in buckets. You put a potato in the very bottom and just cover the top of the potato with dirt. And when it starts to sprout its little leaves, you cover those and then you just keep on repeating. So you hit the top of the bucket and wait till the leaves die and then you harvest.

Kathi (14:41.496)

Okay, I am 100 % gonna try that. I can’t wait for that video. You guys, I’m obsessed with her. She probably thinks I’m creepy at this point. You guys know I’m not creepy. can I just tell you, because I live rurally, and most people are not going to adopt all seven of your practices. Do you love that I’ve just said, here are your seven practices, Lauren? But so many of these,

Lauren (14:44.347)

It’s so easy.

Kathi (15:10.253)

I vibe with because it’s just we can’t get to the store but once a week. And so you start off almost all of your cooking videos. Can you give us the line?

Lauren (15:23.137)

It’s time to make dinner using what we have on hand. That we’re not going to the store, we’re not going out to eat. Yep.

Kathi (15:26.678)

Right.

Yes, because I can only cook from what I have on hand. There’s no going to Chipotle. So this makes me so happy when I’m able to see. Here’s my question. How did you get to be such a creative cook? Was it necessity? Your grandma. So tell me about her.

Lauren (15:43.553)

That would be my grandma.

Lauren (15:48.507)

she was obviously part of the great depression because she’s my grandma and that was the age, but she, her pantry was, I don’t think I ever ate food that was actually in date ever at her house. And she was just to keep it until it’s gone. Cause you used it person. She’s the one who taught me how to sniff and smell and you know what I mean? Make sure everything’s kosher, but she did, she just made what she had. So it was a lot of random. can see her pantry just stacked with like.

Kathi (16:00.384)

Okay.

Kathi (16:05.176)

Mm-hmm.

Lauren (16:17.633)

200 cans of random stuff and she’d throw it together because she’d say hey this looks good and I think this would go with this and this would go and she just had something.

Kathi (16:26.024)

That’s amazing. Okay, we’re gonna take a quick break, pay some bills, and when we come back, I wanna talk a little bit about how I see you stretching your food. Because I think that’s where you really shine. So we’re gonna take a quick break and come right back.

Lauren (16:37.449)

Okay.

Kathi (16:47.424)

Okay, friends, we are back with Lauren who is an extreme cooker, food buyer. She lowers her bills in such an amazing way. And I find it fascinating how you stretch what you have. So for those who listen, a lot of us have problems with clutter. My dad was a hoarder. We tend to collect, but don’t always use.

Kathi (17:16.352)

And so we may want to grab all those things from a buy nothing, but then they’ll sit in our pantry until they’re 10 years out of date and nobody in our family will touch them. How do you get yourself to be like, I’ve got this can of, don’t know, let’s, I’m trying to think of an ingredient.

Lauren (17:39.774)

Okay.

Kathi (17:41.298)

canned potatoes, because I’ve seen those before. I’ve never actually used them. But you would do something with those. How? What’s your thought process for? I’ve got this thing that I may have never used before, and I’m going to do something with it. How do you go? How do you approach that?

Lauren (17:58.764)

I tried to just figure out what the main ingredient that would be that could go with it like those hearts of palm that’s something I’ve never had before but I googled it like what are these because I didn’t know and it said it was similar to artichoke so I was like okay so we can just treat it like artichoke so hence the dip that was born

Kathi (18:08.662)

Right.

Kathi (18:17.782)

Yeah. Okay, so you’re kind of reverse engineering it instead of approaching it recipe first, you’re approaching it ingredient first and then googling or looking, you know, on recipe sites to figure out what you can do with it. Really.

Lauren (18:32.705)

pretty much or like the clams like what do do with this clam chowder? I didn’t make a dip but I will because I have more clams but I made a chowder just because it sounded the best and I had the closest ingredients to what I thought it would need on hand. Okay and the rest we win.

Kathi (18:35.988)

Yes, and you made a clam dip with those, right?

Kathi (18:51.028)

Okay, that’s okay. That’s, I love that. And if you’re saying, well, that’s easy for Lauren, but you know, we have food allergies, would please tell about your special circumstances.

Lauren (19:01.333)

We have food allergies. We have food allergies too. We, one of our children has a really severe peanut allergy. So we have to be careful with cross-contamination, which is big in dinner, obviously, but things like Asian dishes that use peanut sauces, you know, you got to watch. but I am gluten-free. The rest of my family is not. So I just have to be careful. but that even includes like these cream of soups or, know, like a tomato soup and I put in the meatloaf or those things all have.

Kathi (19:28.417)

It’s in everything.

Lauren (19:29.951)

wheat. Yeah. And some of the seasonings. some stuff I get a really unpleasant surprise once I’ve made it. I’m like, I feel like crap. And some stuff we just kinda, you know, I’ll make the recipe like it’s supposed to be. And then maybe I use gluten-free flour instead of regular flour, or I set off a little portion of my gluten-free noodles or my gluten-free sauce on the side and just kind of do it deconstructed. There’s ways around it.

Kathi (19:37.569)

Yes.

Kathi (19:52.978)

I love it. When you do those pantry cleanouts and there’s like a gluten-free cake mix or something, I’m so happy for you. It makes me so happy for you. Okay, another part of what you do is you shop the sales. I am on the constant lookout for the bacon deal at Safeway because of you. tell us your approach to shopping the sales.

Lauren (20:20.645)

so a lot of stores like Safeway specifically, they’re really expensive. I would not normally shop there, but they have loss leaders. So every week they post like just a couple things that are way below what they should be to drag you into the store. So you get the rest of this stuff while you’re there. We don’t do that. We, we have to drive 20 minutes to get groceries anyway, which is pretty normal. But if we’re going to trip, we hit Safeway for its little deals. And then we hop over to the Kroger store, Fred Meyer for its little deals. And you just kind of bundle it in. There’s a grocery outlet up there.

Kathi (20:24.972)

there. Yeah.

Lauren (20:51.041)

do, or like Fred Meyer started doing their weekend freebie this weekend, Saturday and Sunday it’s free bacon. So I was going to take my mom grocery shopping today, but if I literally just wait until tomorrow, cause she’s going to spend more than $35, she gets a free pack of bacon. So there’s no point not waiting.

Kathi (21:07.832)

Perfect. And I’m so jealous of your store selection. We have Safeway, which by the way, we have a child who works at Safeway and his girlfriend. so I was trying to shop the sales there and I was like, guys, it’s so confusing sometimes with their deals and things like that. And my son’s girlfriend says, yeah, they should offer a Duolingo course.

Kathi (21:35.988)

on how to read the Safeway ads. They work there, it’s confusing to them. But Fred Myers and all these croakers, you have some really good options over there. So you’re just kind of, you’re spending a little bit more time going to different places, but getting the things on sale that you know your family will use. Is that correct?

Lauren (21:57.313)

Yeah, and for me it makes sense because they’re all close together. So it’s not extra gas or really extra time. I mean, I’m spending the exact same amount of time and the same amount of gas. So, but it doesn’t make sense if they’re all spread out. Before we go, we look at, I look at the Safeway ad and the Fred Meyer ad and see what I want to do that’s on my list. I write it all down and then I check Ibotta, which is a, like a rebate app on your phone. See if anything matches there. Basically we just kind of hop around the coupons.

Kathi (22:25.272)

So you feel like Ibotta’s worth it?

Lauren (22:28.412)

I know a lot of people don’t, but I like it.

Kathi (22:30.38)

No, no, I’m just curious. I’ve never really used it. So I’m going to check if Lauren says check it out. I’m going to check it out. That’s what I’m going to do.

Lauren (22:38.468)

It’s worth it if you’re buying those items already. Like don’t go out of your way to buy something that they’re rebate. It’s not worth it that way, but if you’re already buying it, it’s just extra.

Kathi (22:43.671)

Right.

I love it. Stretching your cooking. You do such an amazing job stretching your cooking. I’ve seen you when you have a protein that you’re using instead of using a ton of that protein, adding beans and things like that to it to make it stretch. Give me a couple of ideas of some of your favorite stretching techniques because like you said,

you’re feeding five boys plus the two at seven people. And I remember having teenage boys and a couple of teenage girls that if it was on the table, it was being eaten. Like there was no end in sight. So I’d love to hear a couple of ways that you’ve found that you can really stretch that meal.

Lauren (23:34.613)

Rice is the cheapest, best stretcher that we have ever found. It is such a good filler. We do do mashed potatoes, but sometimes the kids aren’t super into those. So rice seems to be the go-to. Beans are really, really good one. It makes everybody super full. They don’t even know it’s there because we usually cook it in with like the taco meat or the soup or whatever. And it just, doubles your meat volume without actually changing what’s in it.

Kathi (23:39.927)

Yeah.

Kathi (24:00.02)

my goodness, I love it. And then the seventh way that I’ve noticed is substituting. You substitute all the time. You’re not going, I have never heard you say, like, I can’t make this because I don’t have X, Y, Z. You are constantly substituting. How do you get a sense of what to substitute? How do you know it?

Lauren (24:13.473)

Yeah.

you say like…

Kathi (24:29.588)

Is it just a sixth sense that none of us can really learn or how did you learn to substitute so well?

Lauren (24:37.63)

I actually just made a lot of stuff that tasted really bad and learned that that was not gonna work. Do it again!

Kathi (24:42.922)

I love it. It really is trial and error, right?

Lauren (24:47.585)

Yeah, it’s not some crazy sixth sense. just, you know, it’s like, this sounds like a good idea. And sometimes it is. And sometimes it’s really not.

Kathi (24:55.638)

Whenever I’m experimenting, I always tell my husband, and there’s a frozen pizza in the freezer if this is terrible. Like we have that back. Top Ramen, there you go, right? Because yeah, that’s the gold standard. Okay, is there any strategy that I haven’t mentioned that you feel like really helps with that grocery budget?

Lauren (25:17.71)

As silly as it sounds, I do the can collecting. I haven’t done a video in a very long time, but we live really so we live kind of by a park. And so there’s a ton of people that throw beer cans and things out their window, which is disgusting and a terrible habit. But I walk the road sometimes more frequently in the summer, but get exercise. You’re picking up the cans. Every bag is like seven bucks. It adds up over time.

Kathi (25:44.312)

And you’re helping the environment too. You’re helping to keep your community a place that people want to be. I love that. Okay.

Lauren (25:52.863)

You look like a weirdo, but it’s okay. I do it at at my son’s football game that we were just at I was picking up a couple that were under the bleachers and he was just like mom. my god

Kathi (26:01.813)

Mom. Yeah, but you know what? Here’s the beautiful thing. You’re not gonna have to take care of me in my old age because I’m in debt for the grocery bills of raising five boys. Yeah, you know what? If that’s the weirdest thing about you, mom, I think we’re good to go. Lauren, this has been so great. I’m gonna put your TikTok handle.

Lauren (26:14.657)

because I’ll be that little weirdo out the parking lot collecting cans, yep.

Kathi (26:26.424)

in the notes so that people can go find you. But I just think if you’re going to spend a few minutes on social media, spend them with Lauren. She is not controversial unless you’re weirded out by expiration date. She’s not controversial. You’re so encouraging to people. And I love that you’re helping us think about our food differently. Thank you so much for being on today.

Lauren (26:35.083)

for it.

Lauren (26:39.521)

I’ll play it twice.

Lauren (26:50.057)

today. Thank you, Kathi. This is really fun.

Kathi (26:52.998)

my goodness. And friends, thank you for being here. You’ve been listening to Clutter-Free Academy. I’m Kathi Lipp. Now, go create the clutter-free life you’ve always wanted to live.

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Have you ever looked around your home and felt that knot in your stomach, thinking, “I don’t want to leave this mess for my kids.”

In this poignant episode, Kathi Lipp welcomes literary agent and editor Kathleen Kerr to share her experience cleaning out her great aunt’s home. After her great aunt’s passing, Kathleen and her family faced the overwhelming task of sorting through decades of accumulated items in a historic Maine farmhouse where nothing had left since the 1930s. Kathleen discusses how her family approached this daunting project, working in teams to tackle different rooms while processing their grief and complex emotions.

Listeners will discover:

  • How to navigate family dynamics when dealing with heirlooms
  • The importance of asking for help before situations become unmanageable
  • How this experience has changed Kathleen’s own approach to keeping family mementos.

The episode offers practical advice for listeners who might face similar situations, while also providing a compassionate look at how hoarding affects both the individual and their loved ones.

Order your copy of Sabbath Soup here and sign up to receive your free ebook featuring four week’s worth of easy meal plans and delicious recipes.

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An “old-school” family bathroom where even the littlest family members had their own special spot. Just one of the many treasures Kathleen’s family discovered after going through her great aunt’s possessions.

 

Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest

Kathi Lipp gives readers an easy-to-follow process for meal planning and prep, so that they can enjoy a full day each week of real rest and refreshment.

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Sabbath Soup includes convenient, seasonal meal plans that take the guesswork out of shopping and cooking. More than just a collection of delicious recipes—including main dishes, breads, breakfasts, desserts, salads, sides, and yes, soups—this is your guide to establishing a weekly rhythm and routine of meal planning and prep that allows you to have a true day off.

Do something good for your soul and experience the peace that comes with a full day dedicated to spending time with God, family, and friends. Savor your Sabbath as you proudly proclaim, “Soup’s on!”

Order your copy of Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest here.

Clutter Free Resources:

Join our Clutter Free Academy Facebook Group

Order Sabbath Soup here and sign up for your free ebook featuring four weeks’ worth of easy meal plans and delicious recipes.

Have you ever experienced the emotional weight of sorting through someone else’s lifetime of belongings?

Share in the comments!

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  • Leave a note in the comment section below.
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Meet Our Guests

 

Kathleen Kerr

Kathleen Kerr is an agent with Alive Literary. Before joining Alive, Kathleen served as an acquisitions editor at Zondervan and Harvest House Publishers. She works with bestselling, debut, and award-winning authors, helping to refine their messages, build their careers, and partner in their ministries

Connect with Alive Literacy at www.aliveliterary.com.

 

Tonya Kubo Picture
Transcript

Kathi (00:01.484)

Well, hey friends, welcome to Clutter-Free Academy, where our goal is to help you take small doable steps to live every day with less clutter and more life. And today I wanna introduce you to an old friend of mine, but a new friend to the Clutter-Free side of podcasting. It’s Kathleen Kerr. Kathleen, welcome to the podcast.

Kathleen (00:20.924)

Thanks so much for having me today, Kathi.

Kathi (00:22.764)

Well, thank you for being here. Now, if people know you and me, they’d say you’re on the wrong podcast girl. Because as we also know, I have the writing at the Red House podcast where we talk all things writing. And Kathleen, in addition to being my agent, was my editor for years and years and years. And so we have had many a book conversation, many a writing conversation, many a marketing conversation. But

Kathleen (00:30.606)

You

Kathi (00:51.166)

You recently took a trip out east where you and I are both on the West Coast, all in the name of decluttering. And so this is your aunt who had passed away, correct? And your great aunt. Okay, so tell me a little bit about the situation. Why you?

Kathleen (01:06.248)

This is my great aunt. Yes.

Kathi (01:17.746)

What did you know you were getting into and what were you surprised that you were getting into?

Kathleen (01:23.336)

Cool, Glory. So this is my great aunt. And she had inherited a house from her parents. And nothing that came into that house since that family got the land in the 30s ever left the house. So my great aunt passed away. Her intention had been to leave it to my mother. My mother had passed away before her, so it went to my father instead.

When she passed away, we knew that we were going to have to clean out the house. And we had been there many times. I grew up every summer spending a few weeks on that property, spending a few weeks with her. And it was a dear, dear part of my childhood, very formative for me. This is land that my grandmother had grown up on, that my great-grandmother had lived and died on. It’s a really very, I mean, it’s sacred ground for me, for my family.

Kathi (02:20.046)

You’re right.

Kathleen (02:22.37)

And we knew that the house was bad. We could see the clutter growing over the years, but there were doors that always remained closed. When she died in May, I went into the house after her funeral and opened some of those doors and was swiftly overcome by a biological need to put on a mask and get out of there because I realized just how bad it was.

Kathi (02:33.25)

Mm -hmm.

Kathi (02:48.398)

you

Kathleen (02:51.304)

at that point. Well, I think I realized about 75 % of how bad it was. So this past summer, I took my daughters out east, we went back to Maine, and I joined my father and a brother and his wife, some aunts and uncles, some cousins, just a whole crew of people that were all going to go through the house together. And we were beyond overwhelmed, all of us knowing how bad it was.

Kathi (02:57.282)

Hmm.

Kathleen (03:19.036)

We were overwhelmed by truly how unspeakable it was and really, truly overcome by grief again, grief that she had lived like that for so long, that she had not allowed any beauty into her life, that her private spaces were so full of junk. It felt self-punishing to me. It was truly hard to see it.

Kathi (03:28.622)

night.

Kathi (03:42.414)

Hmm.

Kathleen (03:46.012)

But our task in that week was just to go through enough of the clutter that we could be confident that we had everything that we could possibly save that we would want, family history, postcards, that we had everything so that we could just hire junk removal. It took a lot of dumpsters to get to that point.

Kathi (04:06.122)

Wow. Wow. it feels so completely overwhelming. And like you said, it feels sad that, you know, I’ve got some people in my life and, that want to make changes right before they sell the house. And I’m like, but I want you to be comfortable now. I want you to have, you know,

be surrounded by things that make you happy now. And I think that, you know, it’s so hard to help people see that that’s a possibility. How do you think your aunt got to that place? I know you’re not a psychologist, I know, but I’m just wondering, do you know how it got to be like that?

Kathleen (05:00.698)

It was little bit over a little bit over time and she kept closing off more doors. She couldn’t, and I do think this is generational as well because it wasn’t just once her parents died and she had the run of the house, the problem started. The problem had started before that. And certainly there’s some of the depression mentality that I’m sure you’ve talked about in this space, but it was far beyond that. was every piece of paper, every envelope, nothing, nothing.

Kathi (05:05.836)

Yeah.

Kathi (05:16.726)

Right. Yeah.

Kathi (05:22.124)

Yes, we have.

Kathleen (05:30.46)

was thrown out. had, you we found, I’m sure people have, these stories won’t surprise you, but we found, you know, those little cups of applesauce that you can get the little plastic containers. We found stacks of those cups that were in the pantry. Alongside really beautiful heirlooms, this place used to be a dairy farm and I found glass pint jars that were stamped with, you know, one pint in the name of the farm, the family name. That’s a treasure to me at that

Kathi (05:30.648)

Mm.

Kathi (05:36.878)

Yeah.

Yeah.

Kathi (05:58.102)

Right, of course.

Kathleen (05:59.964)

But it got to the point that we realized she hadn’t taken care of anything for so long that I couldn’t start. There was so little I could take. And even as I was throwing things away, I’m throwing away dumpsters full of items, much of which I think is would have value to someone, would have monetary value, has intrinsic value. And I’m tossing it all because I couldn’t start caring.

Kathi (06:21.185)

Right?

Kathleen (06:28.646)

when she hadn’t taken care of it for six decades.

Kathi (06:30.924)

Yeah, right. Yeah, I think that there is this idea that I can’t do it, so I’ll leave it for the next generation. And but I’m also going to judge how you take care of it or how you dispose of it or how you give it away. And we have to break those expectations because, you know, yes, there may have been.

depression, may have been other psychological factors going in, but I cannot care more than you did. I just can’t. And so we have to be able to say, you know, these things were not this person. And yes, it’s great if we can keep a few things that bring back beautiful memories of that person, but we can’t be responsible for categorizing a person’s entire life in those situations.

So I wanna get really practical here, Kathleen. You know what, actually, I wanna take a quick break. We’re gonna go pay some bills. And when we come back, I wanna get to the practical side of how you and your family approach this overwhelming task and how you were able to break it down. So we’re gonna go do that and we’ll be back in just a moment.

Hey there, we’re back here on Clutterfree Academy with Kathleen Kerr, my agent, but also the survivor.

of somebody who has had to deal with a hoarder’s house. I mean, that’s really where we are right now. So Kathleen, let’s get, because many of us are gonna have to face this. If it’s not our parents, it may be a sibling, it may be a child, it might be a grandparent, an aunt or uncle, but many of us, as we start to lose family members are going to be the, or the family member has to transition into assisted living or something like that.

We are going to be the ones who have to make sense of all of this. And so can you give me, you said you felt overwhelmed. You felt like, you know, that this was just too big of a task. So tell us how you even started to approach it and how did your plan change as you got into it.

Kathleen (08:51.88)

Oof. So yeah, the organization, just the brainstorming, how can we manage all of this? And I don’t have the luxury, my whole family doesn’t have the luxury of this is just across town or this is an hour drive away. This is a seven-hour plane ride for me to get to this space. and the closest other relatives who are involved in all of this are a 12-hour drive away. So this is not.

Kathi (09:08.696)

Yeah.

Kathleen (09:17.828)

A simple, can do this over a year on the odd weekend. Someone can just run over. This was, we have a finite period of time. We are all here for a week. We need to get done what we can get done in a week. So this was the first get-in and do-the-triage kind of time. So we went in and we split up into teams. We called them Team One and Team A.

Kathi (09:26.478)

Mm -hmm.

Kathi (09:41.802)

Hahaha!

Kathleen (09:43.376)

of splitting up teams into Team One and team A may tell you something about the competitive nature of my family. But that kind of devolved into, we sort of split up into just groups of two. And it was, let’s pick a room and let’s get these rooms in some kind of order. Let’s go through, let’s just get this one room first of all. Let’s get this clean so that this is someplace that we can have.

Kathi (09:49.109)

Absolutely.

Kathleen (10:09.222)

We can set things up. can not really stage things, but we can set up a few things for someone from an estate sale to come in just to make some evaluations. We stationed the younger, stronger guys by the dumpster so they could be tossing things in. There were people who were like, OK, I’m really eager to see what’s up in that front attic. And that was a place of horror, let me tell you. That’s where we found all the Nazi memorabilia. And that was.

Kathi (10:37.577)

lean.

Kathleen (10:38.524)

We’re assuming that this was a war trophy from a great uncle of some kind, but there was a lot of Nazi stuff in there. Anyway, well, we had some bingo parts about who’s gonna find the most racist thing that used to be considered charmingly folksy.

Kathi (10:47.854)

Kathi (10:54.742)

Kathleen my grandfather, was part of The Hitler Youth so we all have those relatives, right? We all have those Yeah

Kathleen (11:03.176)

We all have the relatives. I’ve got them too. My maiden name is Schmidt. You can tell that we, yep, Yep, yep. So yeah, we split up and it was actually, I’m just gonna say, one of the better times I’ve ever spent with my extended family. It was so hard, but it was so good to have a project to work on with these people. Because frequently, I mean, for the last, what, 15 years,

Kathi (11:08.066)

Yeah, Von Campen, I get it.

Kathi (11:27.064)

Yeah.

Kathleen (11:30.544)

My aunts and uncles and cousins, I live on the opposite coast from them. They’re in a different country, actually. So I see them at weddings and funerals quickly, briefly catching up. But to have an actual project to work on, and it’s not just, hey, how’s it going, but how are we going to solve this problem together was a great bonding experience. So yeah.

Kathi (11:39.553)

Yeah.

Kathi (11:52.28)

Kathleen, let me ask, how did you handle it when you disagreed about how to handle something?

Kathleen (11:58.708)

good grief. We had those moments. I am, and a lot of my other family members are extremely practical about this stuff. I knew it was going to be a problem walking into, you know, going into the space. There was going to be so much that I saw that would look like a treasure. And I knew I wouldn’t have time to curate. And my whole methodology as I was going in was touch it once, make a decision about it, touch it once. And then it’s going in the bag to the dumpster.

Kathi (12:24.332)

Yeah.

Kathleen (12:27.746)

or it’s going in, my daughter was there, my nine-year-old daughter was there, so she had a pile of treasures that she was making. So it goes in her treasure pile or it goes to the dumpster. Those are the only two options. There were other family members there who had a very different approach. And for them, it was touch it and hold it and think about it and think about the person and think about the history and then be overwhelmed by love for that history and not be able to put it in any of the piles.

Kathi (12:56.429)

Right.

Kathleen (12:57.18)

And there were some big disagreements. And there were times that we would just defer to each other. If you care about it that much, it’s gonna go to your home. You can have that. We did find there were a few items. I mean, this was sweet. There’s my great -grandparents marriage certificate was framed and hung up above their marriage bed. I thought it was lovely. And I was like, I kinda like to have that. And my dad too was like, I’ve always wanted to have that.

Kathi (13:18.958)

Awwww.

Kathleen (13:25.978)

And ultimately my aunt mentioned as well, I really kind of love to have that. And, or she didn’t even say it that boldly. I think it was just, I always remember looking at that and thinking how nice it was. And she was the one who actually remembered both of those great-grandparents. So it went to her. So I think we were all in the end really good about just being deferential about those things. was so much that everyone could get something.

Kathi (13:40.942)

Yeah, yeah, that makes sense.

Yeah.

Right. you know, I think about it, there are, you if you think about a bullseye, you know, there are people who are closer to that center of the bullseye who have had those life experiences with the great grandparents with, and yeah, it makes sense that, you know, the people who are closest to the center get a little bit more weight in some of those decisions as long as they’re willing to follow that up.

You know, it’s not like, this is really important, Kathleen, you need to take it home. None of that can be allowed. But if it’s really important, they can take it home or they can say, no, we don’t need that. So I love that you deferred to certain people in there. And you know, my brother has already told my mom, yeah, I’m just backing up a U-Haul and taking everything straight to the dump.

And my mom says, and that’s why you don’t have keys to my house. And so.

Kathi (14:55.138)

But, yeah.

Kathleen (14:55.208)

And, you know, it’s acknowledging everyone grieves in different ways. And for me, the space I’ve gotten to, having lost many other relatives, no object, no finite object was worth the relationship. It is not worth continued bitterness. It’s not worth someone seeing that I’m wearing a ring 10 years later and thinking, that should have been mine. No object is worth that. If I really want a ring, I can go buy a ring.

Kathi (14:59.213)

Yes.

Kathi (15:08.888)

Right? Yes.

Kathleen (15:25.126)

Right? And that’s where I come from. Having grown up seeing this house, that’s the context I come from. I’ve chosen to live a very different way. And everyone is grappling with their own grief in different ways. And cleaning out this house for all of us was a deeply emotional experience. You know, if we’re talking just practically, one of the very practical things that I ended up needing to do was create some space.

Kathi (15:34.371)

Right.

Kathi (15:45.335)

you

Kathleen (15:55.096)

you know, when I was getting into my great aunt’s bedroom in particular, that was the worst. That was the space where there was the least beauty, where she had just piled up. There were load-bearing bags of trash. And I’m not exaggerating there load-bearing trash. she had chucked every shoe she’d ever owned just in a corner. There were Christmas gifts that she had been given that were just chucked in a corner. Every purse just chucked over there. Every article of clothing, every jar of deodorant was everything.

Kathi (16:24.182)

Wow.

Kathleen (16:25.154)

Everything was there. And it was so hard to see the way that she had lived. Someone I loved so desperately. And to see the extent of that illness. That was one of those doors that was always closed. And I could be in there for a bit. And then I needed to leave. And I needed to give myself time to walk around the fields that are there. It’s a beautiful piece of farmland. And I needed to go remind myself what was beautiful and get a little bit of distance from all of that.

Kathi (16:37.336)

Yeah.

Kathi (16:53.622)

Yeah, yeah. Obviously, there was probably some mental illness. There was definitely some, some, you know, some issues that she had. I, I have a lot of people who are listening right now, who probably are not in that extreme of a circumstance, but are embarrassed. And they don’t want their family to come over because they don’t want them to see it.

Kathi (17:26.36)

two questions for you. How do you feel about your aunt after seeing that? your feelings towards her change? Did your affection for her change? And I know we should obviously say no, of course not, because that’s the good and right thing for people to say. But I think people need to hear, were you able to stay in a place of compassion?

If there was one thing that your aunt could have done differently, one small thing, whether it was saying, hey, this thing is important, pay attention to it, or I don’t know. What do you wish your aunt knew?

Kathleen (18:00.551)

Yeah.

Kathleen (18:17.64)

I am able to get back to a place of compassion now. There were times when there was real anger when I was going through her room when I was going through her pantry, and there’s a whole barn that’s attached to the space as well that’s just full. There was anger. There was confusion. There was gratitude to God for not letting the whole place go up. There was…

Kathi (18:39.118)

Yeah.

Kathleen (18:46.108)

We found every printer she’d ever owned, every computer, and everything was still plugged into everything else. And I’m like, how did this place not go up? But there really was, there had been a sense of this property is such a gift, you know, that’s coming to my family. And it was not a gift. Going through all of that, that was not a gift. That was hard work. That was sacrifice. And I love her so much. I still love her. And

Kathi (19:01.71)

Hmm.

Kathi (19:12.972)

Yeah.

Kathleen (19:16.232)

I wanted my children to be able to go there and experience it and see what I had loved about that property. And instead I actually needed to send them away. They were there for about an hour and it was like, they shouldn’t be here. This isn’t good for them to see psychologically, biologically, this isn’t good for them. So they were out with my sister-in-law for a large part of this. It was such an overwhelming sense of, why didn’t you let me help? Did you not trust me with this?

Kathi (19:33.09)

Yeah.

Kathi (19:45.89)

Yeah.

Kathleen (19:45.916)

Did you think I would have loved you less if you had let me help with this? And I understand there was probably never a tipping point when there was never any impetus for her to say, I need the help here. But I wish she had. It was this, the last act of love that I could give her was taking that embarrassment for her.

Kathi (20:00.301)

Yeah.

Kathi (20:06.721)

Right. Right.

Kathleen (20:08.506)

I wish I could have done that for her. wish more than I can express that I could have said, okay, please just go away. I’m going to send you on a two-week vacation somewhere. Everyone who loves you, we’re going to help you out with this. Let us help. And sure, it would have been embarrassing. It’s always embarrassing to say I need help. But she just festered away in this house that was rotting around her.

Kathi (20:26.72)

Yes. Right.

Kathleen (20:35.688)

not caring for any of it, so now I can’t care for any of it. Now everything becomes trash. I was seeing things that were absolute treasures. I found a tin of three-by-five cards, and she had been a teacher for 30 some years. And on these three-by-five cards were nursery rhymes that she had written out. And they were all divided into, this is good for cleanup time, or these are fun songs to sing in the classroom while we’re waiting for lunch.

And I wanted to keep every one of them, but unfortunately I found that tin underneath a used adult diaper that had just been discarded. So I couldn’t keep any of it. So yeah, there was anger, there was compassion. It was all mixed together. And when it got to be too much, then I went for a walk.

Kathi (21:11.459)

Yeah.

Kathi (21:15.266)

Yeah.

Kathi (21:18.838)

Yeah. Yeah.

I think what I take away from this is to ask for the help sooner rather than later. And right now, if you’re feeling overwhelmed, right now is the sooner because it’s not going to get better on its own. It’s just not. And most of us have people in our lives who love us, who don’t want to see us living in squalor.

Kathleen (21:32.075)

yes.

Kathi (21:53.304)

who don’t, and here’s the thing, know, clutter is not a big issue for me anymore, but I have that tendency and all it takes is a hurt ankle or a change in circumstances. know, this has nothing to do with what you’ve been talking about with your aunt, but like three things at our house have died all at once, right?

Kathleen (22:07.574)

Yeah.

Kathi (22:22.804)

a light in our garage, our microwave, like everything. And so our lives are totally disjointed at this moment. You wouldn’t think that that would be enough to kind of throw things into a tailspin, but it really is. You know, when you’ve got the contents for your garage out on your driveway, it, it, and it just takes a few of those things to just feel like you’re not going to catch your breath again.

Kathleen (22:34.551)

You

Kathi (22:50.97)

and to say this is when I need the help before those dominoes completely fall. Kathleen, have you taken away anything from this about how you, I know you’re not a cluttery person. I’ve known you long enough to know that, but have you taken anything away from this where you’re like, this is something in my life I’m going to do differently because of this experience I’ve had in my great aunt’s home?

Kathleen (22:59.249)

Absolutely.

Kathleen (23:19.004)

Yes, I have a few items that I kept that are really, really special from in my direct line. I am the oldest woman in my family and I have a piece of kitchen equipment from all these other women. So those are in my China cabinet. Those were up in my China cabinet. So I would see them all the time. And okay, this is going to make me sound like I don’t like I don’t care about the family too much or I don’t care about this group, but.

Kathi (23:31.566)

Got it.

Kathi (23:47.178)

No, no.

Kathleen (23:48.974)

I realized I don’t want to be confronted with that memory and that grief every time I walk into my dining room. I don’t need to see that every time. So I have decided now that those go into my Christmas box. Those are things that I bring out in December. And once a year I can, this is also what I do with my, the family jewelry that I have. It’s not something I wear. You know, I don’t wear a lot of jewelry and,

Kathi (23:57.614)

Hmm.

Kathi (24:01.005)

Yeah.

Kathi (24:07.766)

Yes.

Kathi (24:17.219)

Right.

Kathleen (24:18.896)

just not really me, but I have all of this family jewelry. So I always put it on my Christmas tree to add a little bit of sparkle and bling. And these kitchen items that I have can, those can be part of a holiday centerpiece. I can bring those out. That’s a fun thing to look at, but I don’t need it all the time. My house doesn’t need to absorb someone else’s house.

Kathi (24:24.194)

Mm -hmm.

Kathi (24:31.959)

Right.

Kathi (24:40.278)

Yes, it’s so true. You know, it’s so interesting. My best example of this is Susie Flory, who you know, gave me these handmade Native American dolls that I just love. I love them. I love them. But there’s not really like a place for them. So I put them with my fall decor. You know, like I have a little one box for each season. And every time I pull those out, they make me so happy.

But oftentimes when you have things out 24 seven 365, they just become part of the background noise. And when I pull those out, I think, gosh, I love Susie. I’m so grateful for her friendship. And she got me these specifically because they’re from a native American tribe in the area that she and I both live in. And so they’re really, you know, they have a story behind them and they’re meaningful to me. And

Kathleen (25:31.452)

Hmm.

Kathi (25:37.408)

I think about them every year instead of never. And I love that you’re saying there’s going to be a day each year where I pull those out. I think about the women in my family. you know, and knowing you, I thank God for their legacy and what they’ve sewn into me and your daughters and your sister. It’s, beautiful. It’s absolutely beautiful.

I think we have been tricked into thinking that if we love somebody, we keep their stuff around for the rest of our lives. you know, those dishes may be important to one of your girls when they get older, and they may not be. And both of those answers are okay. Both of those answers are okay because, you know, my daughters are not stuffed people.

Kathleen (26:14.119)

Yes.

Kathleen (26:27.996)

Right.

Kathi (26:34.466)

They don’t want all those things. My sons are definitely not stuffed people. And I’m okay with that. And so for our hearts to be settled to say we don’t need to keep all those things, and yet it doesn’t diminish our love for that person is bucking against society, but it is so true. It is so true.

Kathleen (26:58.428)

Yes.

Kathi (27:00.558)

Can I ask you, what’s the plan for the house now? Are you guys selling it to somebody local? Like, what’s the hope?

Kathleen (27:06.728)

It’s very much in my dad’s hands. So that is kind of a to be determined. The one thing that is certain is that the house needs to be demolished. Because again, she didn’t take care of it. She wasn’t capable of taking care of it. was too much house, was too much property. She had never been trained to. She grew up in a time when the men are doing the hard work and the light bulb goes out in the barn and she’s not gonna get on the ladder to fix it.

Kathi (27:13.464)

Yeah.

Kathi (27:18.956)

Yeah.

Yeah, right, right, absolutely.

Kathi (27:27.555)

Bye.

Kathi (27:34.423)

Yeah.

Kathleen (27:35.314)

You know, especially in the later years, she didn’t know what to do about the mold that was taking over. All of those things. So the house now is, I mean, it was never in fabulous shape, but now it’s the rats and the mice. And I think I told you that the mouse traps had been put out, but then the rats moved in and they stole the mouse traps, which I believe means that the mice have been enslaved by the rats. You could hear them.

Kathi (27:40.13)

Yeah. Yeah.

Kathi (27:47.361)

Right.

Kathi (27:51.895)

Yeah.

Kathleen (28:05.38)

everywhere. It’s the house needs to be demolished. So there’s I see so much in there. And there’s so much history that I can’t there’s there’s a grinding stone. It’s massive. It’s beautiful. It looks like a museum piece. It would be so cool to have I look at that. These old farm tools that my great grandfather and his sons all used. I would love to have them.

Kathi (28:05.637)

my god.

Yeah. Yeah.

Kathi (28:20.547)

Yeah.

Kathi (28:26.978)

Yeah.

Kathi (28:34.68)

Yeah. Right. Right.

Kathleen (28:34.834)

there’s no place in my house for this. What would I do with that? The one piece, the one piece I really want. I think, I don’t know if I showed you a photo of this. I can text you a photo of this for your show notes is that the indoor plumbing was installed in the sixties. And before then there’s a three-holer that’s out in the back that everyone would just use. There’s one hole that’s a little bit smaller. I think that’s for the baby butts and they’re the normal adult size. So, you know,

Kathi (28:47.277)

Yes, please.

Kathi (28:52.152)

Mm -hmm.

Kathi (28:56.331)

No!

Kathi (29:00.77)

Yes. Right. I love the board. Yes.

Kathleen (29:04.764)

And I really want, I want that board. I want the board with the three holes in them. I want to hang that up in my bathroom. I want that so bad, Kathi. So that’s the one piece before the house is demolished that I would like to hold onto. But other than that, it’s all going. And that would have made my great aunt so sad. And she was thinking this could be donated to a historical society. We talked to a variety of historical societies and about all the great farm tools that were authentic and vintage. And they said,

Kathi (29:19.533)

Yeah.

Kathleen (29:34.866)

There are a lot of old farms. We have all of this. We’re good. Thank you so much. And to know that so much of this that she was so, that she put so much weight and identity on ended up in a dumpster in the rain. And it was all going to be ground up and then put in a landfill, all of it.

Kathi (29:37.346)

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Kathi (29:50.796)

Yeah. Yeah.

Kathi (29:57.27)

I think to me the big lesson for this is ask for help sooner rather than later. And you know, it really is to know what you have. Because here on the West Coast, something that is that old is very rare. But on the East Coast, not so much. And so to know that is really, really interesting. And I know that

Kathleen (30:03.048)

Yes.

Kathleen (30:15.868)

Yes.

Kathi (30:27.018)

your husband’s job. Explain just really briefly what he does.

Kathleen (30:32.272)

Right, my husband is a historian, an architectural historian. So he works specifically with the national parks to do cultural resource surveys. But he is trained in fixing houses like this, period houses with the period tools and all the architecture of that.

Kathi (30:51.778)

Yeah, I was just gonna say anything you wanna bring home, he’d probably be okay with. Yeah, exactly. And he would know what to do with it, but he’s like the one person in my circle of people who would actually know what to do with it. The rest of us would be, we’d hang it on the wall and be done with it. But to ask for help, to ask for input, to ask for, is this actually worth something? Or is there somebody who would actually like this?

Kathleen (30:56.32)

he’d love it.

Kathleen (31:11.077)

Exactly.

Kathi (31:20.972)

Because I know your aunt didn’t want to leave you with a burden, but because she didn’t ask for help, she had no choice.

Kathleen (31:27.27)

No.

Mm.

Nor could she, I’m convinced, really process how much of a burden it would be. I don’t think she really knew how much of that, just how much she had. And if I could go back and tell her anything and show her anything, and I’m not sure how this would have been received or could have been received, it was so hard to do that work. was logistically, it is hard for me to get across the continent. Logistically, it is hard for me to take my kiddos with me.

Kathi (31:37.772)

Mm hmm. Yeah.

Kathi (31:49.356)

Right, sure.

Kathleen (32:02.376)

logistically and expensive, you know, that’s a big trip. It’s hard to figure out the Airbnb where we’re going to be staying. It’s hard just to take the week off work. It’s just hard. I wouldn’t give up that time for anything. The time that I spent nurturing new relationships with my cousins and my cousin’s fiance and seeing my kids and seeing the family grow and not being stuck in the past of what the family was in 1950.

Kathi (32:17.912)

Yeah.

Kathleen (32:31.624)

But seeing the family as it is in 2024 was an immense gift to me. It was a blessing to me, even when it hurt, even when it was hard. I wouldn’t give that up for anything. I wish I could have had that and given her the gift of a beautiful space to live at the same time.

Kathi (32:48.578)

Yeah. Yeah.

Kathleen, this is such a good reminder to not let your life become small. To ask for the help to change the light bulb, to take care of the mold the first time you see it, or ask somebody, how do I do this? This big, beautiful house became smaller and smaller because she didn’t know what to do.

Kathleen (32:57.288)

Hmm.

Kathi (33:15.114)

And it’s okay that you don’t know what to do. Roger and I are the world’s living example of like, we don’t know what to do. Like living in this big house and you know, what do you do? And so to get comfortable asking for help, get comfortable asking for help from your family, from friends, because people love you and they wanna help out. Kathleen, this has been a precious time. Thanks so much for spending it with me.

Kathleen (33:23.006)

I’m

Kathleen (33:43.56)

Thanks for making the space for it, Kathi.

Kathi (33:46.082)

Friends, thank you for being here. You’ve been listening to Clutterfree Academy. I’m Kathi Lipp. Now, go create the clutter-free life you’ve always wanted to live.

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Hey there, friend! 

In this episode of Clutter Free Academy, we sit down with Lisa Woodruff, founder of Organize 365 and creator of the PaperSolution Financial Binder. Join us as discuss the importance of organizing financial documents and how it can simplify estate planning and reduce stress for families. 

Listen along to learn: 

  • Why everyone needs a financial binder, regardless of wealth
  • The difference between a binder and digital solutions 
  • What to include in your financial binder 
  • Real-life stories of how organization saved families time and money
  • Tips for getting started with financial organization

Lisa shares practical advice on how to begin organizing financial documents, including setting up a designated container for collecting important papers. She emphasizes the peace of mind that comes from having all crucial information in one place, especially during unexpected events like natural disasters or family emergencies. 

You’ll also will learn how to create a financial binder and keep things such as financial information easily accessible. Don’t miss this invaluable conversation that will empower you to take control of your financial organization and protect your family’s future. 

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Join the Clutter Free Academy Facebook Group to receive your 30-Day 1K Calendar to help track your progress. Remember to answer all three questions to join the group! It’s how we keep it the nicest corner of the internet.

Order your copy of Sabbath Soup here and sign up to receive your free ebook featuring four week’s worth of easy meal plans and delicious recipes.

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Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest

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Do something good for your soul and experience the peace that comes with a full day dedicated to spending time with God, family, and friends. Savor your Sabbath as you proudly proclaim, “Soup’s on!”

Order your copy of Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest here.

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Can you share a personal story of how financial organization affected your own organizing journey?

Share in the comments!

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Meet Our Guest

 

Lisa Woodruff

Lisa Woodruff is the founder & CEO of Organize 365®.

Lisa and 87% of America believe organization is a learnable skill. Yet less than 18% of those same Americans feel they are organized. Through The Productive Home Solution® course, Lisa aims to teach American’s young & old the skill of organizing and unlocking their time for what they are uniquely created to do.

As the host of the top-rated Organize 365 Podcast, with 23 million downloads & counting, Lisa shares strategies for reducing the overwhelm, clearing the mental clutter, and living a productive and organized life. Her sensible and doable organizing tasks appeal to multiple generations and her candor and relatable style make you feel as though she is right there beside you, helping you get organized as you laugh and cry together.

Under Lisa’s direction, Organize 365 has conducted academic research establishing the definitions of housework, home organization and the weight of paper in the American home. This ongoing research is making the invisible work at home visible to all so we can eliminate it and free people from the monotonous tasks of daily living and unlock their time for what they are uniquely created to bring forth in the world.

She is the author of four books including, How ADHD Affects Home Organization and The Paper Solution. Lisa’s understanding of the lived female American experience has helped her to create products & courses like the Sunday Basket® that externalize the routine tasks that take up the executive functioning capacity of our brains, freeing us up to think and create again!

Tonya Kubo Picture
Transcript

Kathi (00:00) 

Okay, this is Kathi and Lisa Woodruff and we’re talking about the financial binder. Five, four, three, two, one. Well, hey friends, welcome to Clutter -Free Academy where our goal is to help you take small doable steps to live every day with less clutter and more life. And guys, today, okay, it’s the subject that has… 

 

Roger and I don’t fight much. In fact, we rarely fight. But if we were going to fight, it would be over finances. It just would be. And I’ve got somebody here who is going to make things a whole lot easier for us. You guys, it’s Lisa Woodruff. She is the founder of Organize 365. I love that name. She’s a professional organizer. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (00:37) 

Ha 

  

Kathi (00:55) 

and she’s here to solve all of our problems. Lisa, welcome to the podcast. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (01:00) 

Kathi, thank you for the introduction. I’m not solving all of the problems, but I will be a friend on the journey. Let’s put it that way. 

  

Kathi (01:03) 

Wait Lisa promises were made no I get it. You know if if you could make this part of our lives 7 % easier that would feel like solving all of our problems. Okay, so here’s my here’s my question Are you just one of those born organized people who was color coding your things in the crib and now we can’t learn anything from you 

  

Lisa Woodruff (01:18) 

Mm 

  

Okay, I can do that. 

  

Well, I was a born organized person, I can’t lie. And my mother did take me shopping with a button box and she would put me on the floor at like Talbot’s or whatever. And I would sort buttons by color for like an hour so she could shop. 

  

Kathi (01:37) 

Okay. 

  

Yeah. 

  

I love that so much. Okay. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (01:47) 

However, it doesn’t matter if you’re born organized or not born organized, eventually in your lifetime, you are going to become roadkill because life is going to move too fast and you can’t keep up. And you need different organization about every 10 to 20 years. So childhood organization doesn’t work for 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, et cetera. And organization is a learnable skill. So I’m a teacher by trade and I took my born organized -ness and my ability to teach and my roadkill. 

  

Kathi (02:08) 

Right. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (02:17) 

decade and I put them all together in my 40s and organized 365 like okay here’s here’s where you know raw talent meets real life and then how can we all actually do this. 

  

Kathi (02:27) 

Okay, because here’s the thing, guys, I’m gonna, full disclosure, Lisa and I met before, and the reason I met with Lisa before is because I don’t let born organized people come on here that think that they are better than us wonderful, talented, creative, but cluttery folk, right? Because we all have different gifts and different skills, and I think you’re absolutely right. Those of us who loved our color coordinated peachies, 

  

Lisa Woodruff (02:33) 

You 

  

Bye! 

  

Yeah. 

  

Right. 

  

Kathi (02:56) 

in the fourth grade, we need an entirely different set of skills. And you know, I’ve just discovered this about myself. The person, the Kathi who sets up the system and the Kathi who has to use the system. Okay, she’s throwing, right, you’re throwing your hands. Okay, you’ve known this much sooner than I have. Explain how you understand this pain. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (02:58) 

Right. 

  

Amen. Two different Kathis. 

  

Mm 

  

Well, I’ve been recently diagnosed with ADHD. First of all, I don’t know how you’re a woman without it because there are so many things we have to do. But also, mean, setting it up as a project, that’s fun. Using it is work, like that’s not fun. 

  

Kathi (03:28) 

sister, right? Yes. 

  

That’s fun! 

  

Yes, it’s so true, right? And you want me to stop for three whole minutes to put something away? Have we met? Right. It’s so boring. The day to day is so boring. okay. So you were a naturally organized person. So when you and I were talking, was, I, you have a bunch of different binders. First of all, why a binder and not an app? That’s part of my question. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (03:43) 

Yes. 

  

Mm 

  

Okay, so we have why a binder and not an app and why a binder and not a file. So why a binder and not a file is step one. And that’s because, you know, I used to like try to teach people how to do file cabinets. I wasn’t very good at it, but like everybody did it. So that’s what I did until the California fires and the Houston earth, the Houston hurricanes came through and I’ve got customers, you know, messaging me from inside of their attics with hatchets so they can break through the roof. I’m like, 

  

Kathi (04:14) 

Yeah. 

  

Right. 

  

Yes, yeah. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (04:40) 

I live in Ohio. Like I have no sense for what these people are talking about. And yet they’re like, I have my Sunday basket with me, but what about my filing cabinet? I’m like, it’s just going to be gone. Like all that information is going to be gone. So it must be a binder. 

  

Kathi (04:42) 

Correct. 

  

And Sunday Basket is like your day -to -day organization stuff, right? Okay. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (04:56) 

Yeah, it’s your weekly organizing. So the binder is portable and that is crucial for two reasons. One, if you live in any of the coastal areas, you will evacuate at some point. But two, whenever you need this information, you don’t need it in a file cabinet. You need it at the lawyers, at the hospital, at the wherever. Like your information needs to be portable. So that’s why it’s a binder. And why not an app? Well, you know, everything Organize 365 does is analog because I’m a kindergarten teacher. Like every single human can use my products. 

  

Kathi (05:01) 

Mm -hmm. 

  

Yeah. Yeah. 

  

It’s so true. Yeah. 

  

Mm -hmm. Right. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (05:26) 

You can digitize it and make it your own productive thing if you want, but here’s the thing. An app is not necessarily shareable and it doesn’t necessarily stay up to date. So maybe your family is super high tech and you’re all on like Google Drive and you have a password protected and so you have all of your financial information in there and you share it with your siblings and your parents and like your Uber or whatever. I don’t even know who this family is. But as soon as you forget to update the app, it’s pointless. And if you don’t have the password, it’s pointless. 

  

Kathi (05:33) 

Mm -hmm. Yeah. 

  

Yes. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (05:54) 

So apps are personal organization. Binders are global organization. So you’re going to organize in a binder in analog. And we’re going to talk about the financial binder today. The financial binder is like 30 % in your file cabinet, 50 % on your computer, and 20 % in your brain. So even if your family gets to your file cabinet, they only get 30 % of the information. And even if they get online, they’re not going to go to every place that you have stored your information. 

  

Kathi (06:00) 

and trisome. 

  

Okay. 

  

Hmm. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (06:20) 

So it is a way for you to keep your information updated if you update it annually. And then when you actually need it, which is when someone is gonna be your power of attorney or your power of healthcare or your settle your estate, that is like, you’ve just saved them a year’s worth of work. And when I had to settle my dad’s estate, I didn’t find almost everything that I needed because I just didn’t even know how I would find it. So that’s why not an app. 

  

Kathi (06:20) 

Yeah. 

  

Right, absolutely. You know, and if you didn’t have a good answer for why not an app, and I knew you did, I was going to give you my good answer is that it would completely intimidate my mom, who this is, in our family, that’s the most pressing need, right? So, you know, my husband and I are both pretty techie, but it’s interesting. We’re in between two kind of non -techie 

  

Lisa Woodruff (06:46) 

you 

  

Right, right. 

  

Kathi (07:09) 

Our kids are more analog or at least the kid who is responsible enough to do things with our estate. You have to know your kids, right? You know, the one who’s actually gonna do something. And my mom, it would have been really intimidating for her to have to get online. Now she’s able to look things up in small portions as we go through this binder, but she’s not having to input it there, which has been… 

  

Lisa Woodruff (07:33) 

Mm -hmm. 

  

Kathi (07:40) 

which has been a godsend, I’m not gonna lie. Okay, so a couple of questions, Lisa. We’re not rich, do we really need to do this? 

  

Lisa Woodruff (07:48) 

Okay. So first of all, we’re talking about, we like started mid sentence. So this is the organized 365 financial binder. And it was created after I had to settle my dad’s estate. I had to be the power of attorney. And then I was the executor of the estate. And I went to Amazon to Google, like, give me Mad Libs for settling an estate. Doesn’t exist. They’re like four books and that’s it. There’s no like, let me just plug everything into this system. And your financial picture is, has a lot of parts to it. 

  

Kathi (07:52) 

yes, that’s true. Yeah. 

  

Right? 

  

Yeah. 

  

I love it. 

  

Yeah. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (08:18) 

So what you normally hear about is have a will. You should have a will. Have a trust. If you have any assets, you should have a trust. Have a 401k and make sure you have a beneficiary. Agreed. These things are the easiest things to do as the executor. Literally within one week of my dad’s passing, we’d already cashed out the 401k. My sister and I had the money. We transferred the cars into our name. We’d transfer the house into my name. Like that all happened within 10 days. However, the administration of your life 

  

Kathi (08:18) 

Yeah. 

  

Okay. 

  

Hmm 

  

Wow. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (08:47) 

needs to be accounted for. A final tax return needs to be done. All of the assets needs to be distributed. You have to get out of the Verizon contract, which is the hardest thing to do. You have to settle every single credit card. You have to shut down the banks. have to like, and none of this is done by your CPA, your tax lawyer. My dad had all the lawyers within a month. They were all gone. And I was just left doing the housework for my dad, just like I do the housework for me. And that’s what people don’t realize. It usually falls to a woman. 

  

Kathi (08:57) 

right? Yeah. 

  

you 

  

It does. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (09:17) 

And it’s all the administration. Like I’m getting my PhD now and the only literature that we have about this is widowed women who have so much hard time being the administrator of their spouse’s estate. Because you’re also grieved. It’s not like you’re like, yeah, I’m gonna add this to my checklist. No, you’re all of sudden sometimes unexpectedly planning a funeral for someone you love. And now you realize that you were named in their will as the executor. And you’re like, I don’t even know what that is. 

  

Kathi (09:30) 

And yes. 

  

Yeah, and it’s interesting because, my mom’s done all this stuff and I’m the executor of her will and I really don’t understand it all because all of this happened with her parents when I was, yeah, I was in the middle of diapers, you know, yeah, I didn’t, I didn’t think it through. But as I’ve seen friends go through it and they talk about this, this huge burden and you’re right, like, you know, who’s the executor of ours is one of our daughters. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (09:59) 

too young. Yep. 

  

Kathi (10:14) 

Because we know she’ll show up and we know she’ll do the right things and not that the boys wouldn’t but yeah, well anyway, that’s a different discussion. We love our boys, but I think that when we say the word estate, we think vast riches and wealth and most of us. Yeah, I would not think of those things as the estate, right? Okay, so. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (10:32) 

And I mean your water bill, your garbage bill, your Verizon bill. Right, that’s your estate. 

  

Kathi (10:45) 

My next question is, you know what? We’re gonna take a quick break. We’re gonna go pay some bills. We’re gonna come back. And then I wanna talk about how do you actually get started with, like what’s in here? You’ve told us a little bit, but like what’s actually in here? And I need some easy steps to get started because if you say, Kathi, I need you to copy your entire financial history or your mom’s entire financial history into this. 

  

It’s a very short interview. So we’re gonna take a podcast break. We’re gonna come back and then we’re gonna get started with that question. 

  

 BREAK 11:19 

  

Kathi (11:34) 

Guys, I am back with Lisa Woodruff, who is the founder of Organize 365, and she is the creator of the PaperSolution Financial Binder. And when we were first talking financial binder, I’m like, why do I need a binder for my bank account? But really, what your end goal with this binder is what? That somebody can do what with it? 

  

Lisa Woodruff (12:00) 

that if anything were to happen to me, that someone could step in and be power of attorney and ultimately settle my estate. Like we’re all gonna live to be forever, know, a million years old. Don’t worry about it. Nothing is happening to you. However, once you’ve settled in a state, you’re like, my gosh, like if you’ve ever settled in a state, the first thing you do is you go home and you clean out your storage room because you’re like, I am not leaving this problem for someone else. And my husband and I are gonna settle at least five estates. You know, we have siblings and we’re both the oldest. We both have parents. 

  

Kathi (12:09) 

Absolutely. Right. 

  

Hmm, yeah. 

  

Right. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (12:27) 

They were divorced, so they have, you know, like we are listed on everybody’s. So that is the ultimate, but you know, that’s so far down the road. Then you can like kick this can and be like, I’m not going to do this. So what is in the binder? Number one, you do have some things that you just need. You would put in a file cabinet. So instead of a file cabinet, you’re going to put it your financial binder, like your latest 401k statement. I always keep my social security statement. 

  

Kathi (12:29) 

yeah. 

  

Mm -hmm. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (12:53) 

Like I’m not hope, I don’t know if I’ll ever get this money, but I’m keeping the letters that they send like every couple of years. birth certificate, I put my passport in there, put our marriage certificate in there, my kids adoption certificates are in there, so any of those kind of important papers. I do have in there like our credit report when we get a credit report. If we sign up for a new credit card, I put the credit card in there, so like I just have like that introductory thing that you’re probably never gonna need it. 

  

Kathi (12:55) 

Right. Yes. 

  

Mm -hmm. 

  

interesting, yeah. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (13:19) 

but you want to put it in file cabinet, you might as well put it in here. You’re really making a scavenger hunt for yourself and others. So if you need it. So like if you pay off a car, that goes in there, like all of our car information is in there. All of my insurance information is in there, life insurance, but also fire, auto, all of that insurance. Anything related to our security system is in there, ADT. Again, life insurance will pay out within a week. Like anything that has a beneficiary attached to it, you will get the money like, 

  

Kathi (13:22) 

Yeah. 

  

Yeah. Yes. 

  

Hmm. 

  

Yeah. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (13:47) 

It’s almost instantaneous. It’s amazing how fast it happens. And the more organized you are, the better. So my husband has a couple of different retirement accounts. I have a couple of retirement accounts. Whenever they give you the annual statement, I just replace it in there and shred the old one. It’s just kind of like you would in your file cabinet. So that’s number one. Just anything you would file, it goes in there and you just keep the most recent one. 

  

Kathi (13:56) 

Right? 

  

smart. Right. 

  

Okay, I love that. Go ahead. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (14:13) 

So then the second thing is, you I had my father pass, I had a couple of employees who also had settled estates we started compiling all the things that we had to find that we didn’t know we had to find. Like my dad had been in the military. I didn’t know he had a military ID number. I mean, that was before I was even born. Like, so that kind of thing. So you would just write down your military ID number. It’s like a Mad Libs. You know that where you would fill in and you make the funny story. 

  

Kathi (14:25) 

All right. 

  

Right? 

  

Hmm. Yes. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (14:37) 

So there’s like a line for all kinds of stuff that you may or may not have, but if you have it and it’s your binder, then you just fill that information out. Stuff that you wouldn’t even have on the computer or in your file cabinet is just like you knew that you were in the military, even if your grandchildren don’t know that you were. So that’s kind of like being able to fill things out. And then you can also like put post -it notes in there. Like we do have banking information, we have bank information sheets, and we just ask you where you bank, what kind of a bank account it is. 

  

Kathi (14:52) 

Right. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (15:05) 

what the password is, if you have a safety deposit box, where is it located? What’s the number? You know, I mean, you just forget about these things. You don’t need to put down your bank balances. You could even just put, like for me, I could just put down US Bank, 11 accounts, because we do, we have 11 accounts. Like once you get into US Bank, they’re going to give you everything you need. But maybe my family doesn’t know I also have Huntington Bank, and that’s where I keep some of our money for a future business we’re going to purchase, land that we’re going to purchase to build our future. 

  

Kathi (15:10) 

right, yes. 

  

Hmm? 

  

Yeah. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (15:34) 

building and so it’s not in our main bank account. You may not realize we have two banks. So here’s a great story and why I really started making this financial binder. Quite a few of the people that I organized in Cincinnati were widows. So they would call me in to help them, especially with the paper. They were very overwhelmed. They’d gotten, you know, the life insurance and that it was this detritus that was holding them up and they weren’t used to doing all the bills. And so we would go through their file of cabinets and this one woman’s husband had 

  

80 binders, 80. He had kept every single paper transaction of every single financial thing he had ever done because it was his hobby. And they were like mutual funds. They weren’t even things where you had to like know the transaction because the value, wasn’t a stock, although he did have stock also. And so she had a bank, Fifth Third, and we went to the bank and we found four bank accounts, which she knew all these bank accounts. And I’m going through her mail every single month. I’m going down there and going through and you can sort paper without looking at like what the dollar amount of values are. It’s weird trick. 

  

Kathi (16:11) 

my word. 

  

right? Yeah. 

  

Mm 

  

Lisa Woodruff (16:34) 

professional organizers can do. And I’m looking at these bank accounts, I’m like, I swear there’s a fifth bank account, you know, and I’m kind of dyslexic, so I’m not really looking at the numbers, but I’m like, I think we’re always getting five. And she’s like, do you want to go to the bank? I’m like, I do. And like the estate was almost settled, like we’re a year after. We’re there at the bank and they’re like, Mrs. Woodruff, there are only four accounts here. We’ve gone through this, like we’re ready to settle the estate. Everything’s been closed. Everything’s been transacted. I was like, I just think there’s a fifth account. 

  

And they’re like, do you want us to look for it again? I said, I do. And I’m like a people pleaser. So I’m like, wow, I’m really out on a limb here. Now I’m telling my client we’re at the bank. I’m telling the banker. Kathi, there was another $100 ,000 bank account. This man had set up an LLC and she was like, my gosh, I remember this now. He had put it aside for our dream home we were going to build someday. Cause he died of a massive heart attack, like on the way home from a, he was in his 60s, but he wasn’t really old. 

  

Kathi (17:08) 

bright. Yes. 

  

What? 

  

right. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (17:31) 

She’s like, I forgot about it. He had created an LLC. So that’s why it didn’t show up when they ran all the social security numbers and we didn’t run across and he didn’t put that LLC paperwork in any of the 80 binders that I went through. And so I have more than one story like this where you just are living your life at breakneck speed and you’re like, just like trying to keep it. I’ll do that later. I’ll do that later. I’ll do that later. And you in your head know and you remember in your head there’s a fifth bank account. 

  

Kathi (17:36) 

Yes, because it’s a totally different entity. 

  

Yeah. 

  

Yeah. 

  

Yeah. 

  

Right! 

  

Lisa Woodruff (18:00) 

But there’s literally no trail of it anywhere in this house. $100 ,000, Kathi, $100 ,000. 

  

Kathi (18:07) 

And who knows what would have ever, know, where that would show up if there would ever be another statement. Yes. my goodness. And here’s what I’ve come to learn is that we don’t know our parents as well as we think we do. And right? They’ve had these lives that we’ve been privy to, you know, just a section of. And so we… 

  

Lisa Woodruff (18:14) 

It never, it wouldn’t, it wasn’t going to show up ever. Yep. 

  

True. Yeah. 

  

Yes. 

  

Kathi (18:37) 

We don’t even know the questions to ask sometimes. And that’s why I like that the binder is very comprehensive because it asks questions. Yeah, like my mom and dad were never part of the military. And so it feels good that you can say, I don’t have to worry about any of that stuff. Yes, exactly. But you know, I just recently had a client, not a clutter client, a writing client who was getting rid of a bunch of 

  

Lisa Woodruff (18:52) 

Not that one. 

  

Kathi (19:06) 

books and binders and things from her mom. And she goes, you know, we settled the estate, you know, this was a decade ago. And she decided she just needed to go through this one binder just to make sure, just to make sure she wasn’t missing any little piece of information. And I can’t remember what the paperwork was, but the paperwork that was in there that they had never seen before entitled them to financial 

  

compensation that her son, so the deceased grandson, was able to put a new roof on his house. And if you’ve ever put a new roof on your house, you know how crazy expensive that is. And for my client to pay off some huge debts. it’s like, I think, wouldn’t grandma be devastated if that money had not gone to that, right? 

  

Lisa Woodruff (19:45) 

See. 

  

if you lost that. And you know, you talk about clutter and we see clutter everywhere and paper is small and tiny and overwhelming. And so we can really cram a lot of paper in a banker’s box. Like we could cram it in there and shove it in the bottom of closet and we’ll take another one and shove it somewhere else. And then we got the laundry basket over here and we’re like, I don’t really have that much paper cause it’s like all over your house. And the other thing I noticed as an in -home professional organizer, which I am not anyway. 

  

Kathi (20:05) 

Right, something that she had worked so hard for. 

  

Yes. Yes. 

  

right? 

  

Mm 

  

Lisa Woodruff (20:33) 

anymore. I do it online now. But I still do this in home and we have a certification for this is paper organizing retreats. Because when I would organize paper, I promise you, you start organizing paper 30 minutes in you’re like, where is the wine and I’m out of here. Like, it’s just too much and you don’t know what to do with it and you’re afraid you shouldn’t get rid of it. So you just stop again. But people there’s somebody that loaded their RV full of paper and drove it here from Canada. People will drive 18 hours with their paper. We have a weekend paper organizing retreat. 

  

Kathi (20:33) 

Okay. Okay. 

  

Right. 

  

Yeah. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (21:02) 

And we have shredding on site because we have professional organizers here, which I know you don’t like that, but you do in this case. And they will, now 50 % of the people coming have lost a spouse or have lost a parent. And they’re just going through all of that paperwork and they just want us to say, shred, keep, shred, keep, you know, and then they’re like, okay, now I’ll go settle the estate because it’s so much work and it’s so rude. Like your life doesn’t stop when you have to settle somebody else’s estate. Like it just keeps spinning. 

  

Kathi (21:06) 

Yeah. Yeah. 

  

Right. 

  

Yes. 

  

Right? don’t get six months off of work in order to do that. And I think that we are so scared to throw away that one magical piece of paper. it’s so hard to know if this piece of paper is going to be what you need, the key to everything. so I love that the, there are a couple of things I love about the binder. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (21:30) 

No, it’s so hard. 

  

Yes. 

  

Yes. 

  

Kathi (21:54) 

One, it asks all the right questions. And two, I don’t even know how else to put this, Lisa. It’s a landing place. It’s like a safe landing place, right? And like, what I love what you said is when I get my social security statement, I can throw away the last one because I know that I have the most recent one and then the rest of it can go away. Like I know that when I pay off 

  

Lisa Woodruff (22:02) 

Yes. Hug it. Yeah. 

  

Mm -hmm. Yes. 

  

Kathi (22:24) 

my car note that I know where I am going to put it. And as somebody who lived through the Caldor fire and was out of her house, you know what? I’m very grateful. Our town lost over a thousand structures, almost 800 homes, and we lost two acres of property, but it never came to our house, but it burned on all four sides. And so 

  

Lisa Woodruff (22:26) 

Yes. 

  

I’m sorry. 

  

I’m sorry. 

  

Kathi (22:53) 

We left, we know, you know, for three weeks we were out of our house. We couldn’t get back in. And for three days we didn’t, we assumed that our house was gone. And you know, and I, we did have one binder that we picked up and took with us, but it wasn’t as comprehensive. And yes, it was like your brain after you leave the house says, where’s that? Where’s that thing? And 

  

Lisa Woodruff (22:54) 

So you know. Yeah. 

  

can’t even imagine. 

  

Kathi (23:22) 

You know, the other thing I love that what you said is about Post -it notes to be able to say, here’s where you can find the key to the box that you need. Here’s, you know, some, you know, there are some weird things that, you know, everybody’s life is weird, right? We all have that one little thing. Like my mom’s weird thing is, Kathi, don’t donate all the milk glass when I die. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (23:28) 

Stick it in there. Yes. 

  

Kathi (23:49) 

You know that stuff’s valuable. It’s like okay mom I promised her I won’t do that and I know as we go through the binder there will be a note about the milk glass because that’s really important her like question You know the things that are unique to each of us like my mom’s a quilter What do you want me to do with the quilt to have a place to put all those answers? That isn’t between your two temples is so so important Lisa. Yeah 

  

Lisa Woodruff (24:08) 

Hmm. Yes. 

  

and that will give her so much peace because she’ll know she communicated it to you and it will give you so much peace because you’ll know what you can donate and what you really, you know, can’t donate immediately. And also one thing before we go, go ahead and put your passwords in there. Like no one, I promise you, everybody’s like, I can’t put my passwords in here. Trust me, if they come into your house and they go buy the 80 inch TV and they go for your financial binder, which is unlabeled, that is an unusual burglar, no one’s coming in your house to get your passwords to whatever. 

  

Kathi (24:17) 

Yes, that’s what I want. Right. 

  

Right. Yes, please. Yes. 

  

Yes. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (24:45) 

put your passwords in there. Just put them in there. Even if you just put a post in another good, use US bank, my banker is Tony and here’s my password or whatever. And also go to the bank and just drop off the power of attorney so that they know like, you’re not gonna need it today. But when you do need it, you’ll be so grateful that you did the work ahead of time. And if you don’t do the work ahead of time because you’re pushing off, because you just wanna test your limits, just know that this resource is here. 

  

Kathi (24:46) 

Yes. 

  

Right. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (25:11) 

and it will be a lifeline. And along with that, you get the organized 365 community of people who are also doing these same binders. They’re all living the same experience you’re living, which makes you feel like you’re not going through it alone. 

  

Kathi (25:22) 

You know, I’m going to also highlight something else that you just said there. Talk to Tony. Because, you know, what we’ve told our daughter is, you know, God forbid something happens to us, our neighbor, which where we live, she’s 30 minutes away, Susie. Yeah, yeah, we live in the forest, but go talk to Susie because she knows about mountain living. She knows about 

  

Lisa Woodruff (25:29) 

Yeah. 

  

Sheesh. 

  

Kathi (25:50) 

She’s an author. I’m an author. Like she’s the key to so much information so you don’t have to figure it out on your own. And I love that you said that, you know, talk to Tony at the bank, leave a little roadmap of the people who are going to be helpful because our children will be sad when we pass and to have people there who can help take care of them, to help take care of your brothers and sisters and all of that is so critical. If you could give. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (25:57) 

Right. 

  

Kathi (26:18) 

Just one piece of advice before they get the binder like what they could do right now because I know like you said when you settle in the state you want to go clean out your storage unit, right? What they’re gonna listen to this and say I want to go do something right now and guys we’re gonna give you the link and we’ve got we’ve got a a code for you know, we’re gonna we’re gonna set you up well Because guys whether you’re buying this for yourself or for your parents This is gonna save somebody 

  

weeks worth of work. So what’s the one piece of advice you could give Lisa for somebody to do right now? 

  

Lisa Woodruff (26:50) 

so much time. 

  

Okay, super simple. I want you to go get your favorite container or basket that’s in your house. And I want you to set it aside and I want you to put a post -it note on it that says financial binder. And then as you come across anything that would go in a financial binder, I want it to go in this basket. As you think, that’s right, I wanna write this down, write down a note card, put it in the basket so that when you do get the financial binder, you already have some of your ideas, some of your papers. 

  

Kathi (27:01) 

Mm -hmm. 

  

yes. 

  

Mmm 

  

Lisa Woodruff (27:21) 

And you could keep on your decluttering journey and going through with all your friends, all the things you do with Kathi and all the different groups that you’re in. But anything financial at a minimum has to start going in this basket and start separating it out from all the other places it is so that even if you don’t have the financial binder yet, you have the beginning. 

  

Kathi (27:39) 

I love it so much. This is so great. Okay, guys, check the show notes. You’ll see how to get this. Guys, you know, I’m doing this because I’m using it. I only recommend things to you that I’m actually doing and I am doing this because, you know, we have probably three estates that are going to need to be settled in the next 20 to 30 years. And I don’t want to put that burden on somebody else. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (27:59) 

Mm 

  

Kathi (28:06) 

They’re already going to have to go through my closet. That’s enough for any human being. right. Lisa, thank you so much for being with us today. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (28:14) 

Thank you. 

  

Kathi (28:15) 

And guys, I’m gonna make sure that you have the link to Lisa’s website so you can go check out her other resources because if you’re feeling overwhelmed by any portion of your life, there’s gonna be a way to organize it on Lisa’s website. I’ve checked it out guys, you’re gonna wanna go check it out. And friends, Lisa was here, but friends, we’re so grateful you’ve been here. Thank you for listening to Clutter Free Academy, I’m Kathi Lipp. Now go live the clutter free life you were always intended to live. 

  

Lisa Woodruff (28:31) 

Thanks. 

 

 

 

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641 – The 3 Words That are Keeping You Cluttered

(And How to Change It)

Hey there, friend!

In today’s episode, we’re diving deep into the power of the words we use when it comes to our clutter – not just the things we say out loud, but those whispers in our hearts that can either paralyze us or propel us forward.

In this eye-opening episode of Clutter Free Academy, Kathi Lipp sits down with authors Angie Hyche and Liana George to discuss the powerful impact of language on our decluttering journey. The trio explores the common phrases – or “dirty words” – that keep people stuck in cycles of clutter and shame.

Listeners will discover:

  • Why no one is “born organized” and how organization is a learned skill
  • The real meaning behind “just in case” thinking and how it relates to fear
  • The importance of starting small and celebrating progress
  • Why cleaning and organizing are “morally neutral” activities

If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, ashamed, or just plain stuck when it comes to decluttering, this episode is for you.

Join the Clutter Free Academy Facebook Group to receive your 30-Day 1K Calendar to help track your progress. Remember to answer all three questions to join the group! It’s how we keep it the nicest corner of the internet.

Order your copy of Sabbath Soup here and sign up to receive your free ebook featuring four week’s worth of easy meal plans and delicious recipes.

Click here to be notified when the next podcast episode is released!

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Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest

Kathi Lipp gives readers an easy-to-follow process for meal planning and prep, so that they can enjoy a full day each week of real rest and refreshment.

Could you use a break from cooking (and everything else) once a week? Not only is rest vital for your mind and body, it’s good for your soul too. God designed us to enter into Sabbath rest one day per week, but as you know, meals still need to be made. Your family still needs to be fed.

Sabbath Soup includes convenient, seasonal meal plans that take the guesswork out of shopping and cooking. More than just a collection of delicious recipes—including main dishes, breads, breakfasts, desserts, salads, sides, and yes, soups—this is your guide to establishing a weekly rhythm and routine of meal planning and prep that allows you to have a true day off.

Do something good for your soul and experience the peace that comes with a full day dedicated to spending time with God, family, and friends. Savor your Sabbath as you proudly proclaim, “Soup’s on!”

Order your copy of Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest here.

Can you share a personal story of how negative self-talk affected your own organizing journey?

Share in the comments!

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Meet Our Guests

 

Liana George & Angie Hyche

Angie Hyche is an author, speaker, and professional organizer. She’s the author of Unholy Mess: What the Bible Says about Clutter, co-author of Uncluttered: Shaping Your Heart & Home for What Matters Most, and co-host of the Uncluttered podcast. She loves helping people simplify so they can prioritize what matters most.

Liana George is an author, podcaster, and speaker based in Texas. Her first three novels are based on her experiences as a professional organizer and her time in China. When she’s not organizing or writing, you’ll find her reading, traveling, watching tennis, or keeping up her small farm in Houston.

Connect with Angie Hyche and Liana George on their website https://uncluttered.faith/ and on social media https://www.facebook.com/uncluttered.faith and https://www.instagram.com/uncluttered.faith/

 

Tonya Kubo Picture
Transcript

Kathi (00:01.578)

Okay, this is, we’re talking with Angie Hyche and Liana George, and we are talking about the dirty words. So you editors are gonna be very intrigued by this. okay, five, four, three, two, one.

Well, hey friends, welcome to Clutter-Free Academy, where our goal is to help you take small, doable steps to live every day with less clutter and more life. Today, we’re diving into a topic that I hope is, as much as we talk about what to do with your hands when it comes to decluttering, I’m hoping that this is going to help your head. That’s my goal for today, and that’s the goal of my two guests, because…

If you’ve ever caught yourself saying, I’ll get to that someday, or I’m just not an organized person. Okay, by the way, nobody’s actually born organized. Can we just be really honest about that? I wanna talk about language today, and so do my two guests. We wanna talk about the language, not just the language you use with the people you love in your home, but the language you use with yourself. I have two amazing guests. First,

I have Angie Hyche and we also have Liana George. Okay guys, sorry. We have Angie Hyche and Liana George. They are the co-authors of the new book, Uncluttered, Shaping Your Heart and Home for What Matters Most. And you guys, you know that’s my jam, right? And they are the co-hosts of the Uncluttered podcast. So we’ve got a bunch of people who love to talk about clutter.

or actually who love to talk about decluttering? Angie is also the author of Unholy Mess, What the Bible Says About Clutter and a professional organizer. And if you don’t think that the Bible talks about clutter, let’s just talk about how a lot of the little red bits of the New Testament are about what you own and what you love. And so I don’t know of a better definition of that than clutter. Liana?

Kathi (02:14.37)

Is a novelist whose first three books draw from her experiences as a professional organizer and her time in China my goodness. Okay. We have so much to talk about ladies. Welcome to the podcast. I’m so glad to have you here today

Angie Hyche (02:29.41)

Thank you, Kathi. We have been looking forward to this for so long. So thank you.

Liana George (02:29.636)

Thank you.

Kathi (02:34.582)

Well, and that’s because your emails kind of got buried in my inbox. That’s why it was so long, but you guys have been so gracious. Liana, I have to ask about your time in China, was that military? Was that missionary? What was that?

Liana George (02:42.214)

Thank

Liana George (02:51.164)

No, it was neither. It was my husband’s company decided to build a facility there And so they moved us there in three weeks. We had three weeks to move Yes, three weeks. We went there July 4th of 2006 and I was back by August 8th So my kids could start school. So yeah, so I really needed to be organized to get an overseas move

Kathi (02:52.941)

Okay.

Kathi (02:56.809)

Nice!

Kathi (03:01.196)

What?

Kathi (03:12.078)

my goodness. Okay. The reason I was so intrigued by that little detail was because I was a missionary in Japan for a year. And talk about a culture change. Yes. So my goodness. Okay, I definitely have to pick up that book. Okay, so I’ll get some book recommendations from you at the end.

When you guys first pitched this idea to me about what you come on and talk about, one of the subjects you gave me was the dirty words of organizing. I’m like, okay, that’s scandalous enough that I am dying to find out what you’re talking about. So Liana, here’s my question. What do you mean by the dirty words of organizing?

Liana George (04:35.214)

Yeah, it’s it’s it is. It’s enough to grab your attention and that’s the whole point. We want to grab your attention because so many times, like you said earlier, you know, it’s the work of our hands that we do when we get organized, but we don’t understand the power that our language has on our efforts to get organized. And so many times we use phrases or words that can severely hamper whatever we’re trying to do. And it’s words like some day later.

Kathi (04:40.302)

Mm -hmm.

Kathi (04:51.351)

Mmm.

Liana George (05:05.156)

just in case, I don’t know, or I can’t, right? And so they’re dirty in that, just like the dirty words that we grow up learning not to say, they are, they’re scandalous, right? And they hamper and they hurt us. They don’t, not only, got, when I was working with clients, I’d heard them so much, I was like, you’re hurting my ears, please stop saying that.

Kathi (05:31.48)

Mmm.

Liana George (05:32.552)

So that was, I was like, you know, trying to reframe the way they spoke because we, as we know, the words have power. And so when we use these words, we can either help our efforts or hurt our efforts.

Kathi (05:40.462)

Yeah.

Kathi (05:46.84)

So this is really interesting to me because I’ve got people in my life, some people who, you know, they just naturally tend towards clutter or, you know, maybe they even have hoarding tendencies. And I feel like so often the dirty words aren’t aimed at the stuff, they’re aimed at ourselves. And I wonder…

Angie Hyche (06:08.332)

Mm -hmm.

Kathi (06:11.958)

Okay, so let’s talk about when it’s me, when I’m the one who’s saying, I can’t, I’ll do it later. I don’t have, you know, I don’t have the time right now. I don’t have the energy right now, which could all be true. I, you know, I have been at times in my life where decluttering was the last thing on my list. You know, we were in survival mode, but we, we have to, we have to set our own sea level of what, you know, survival is.

So how do these words affect ourselves, Angie? And then how can we start to, well, let me ask you this Angie, what are the words that you bristle at? know, Liana told us hers, but I would love to hear the ones that you bristle at. And how do you start to change that conversation?

Angie Hyche (07:05.304)

I think the ones, the specific ones that I tend to hear the most and that bother me the most is the just in case. I need to keep this just in case because I might need it. And, you know, there are, there’s, there’s such extremes with that, you know, to say, well, I better take my umbrella just in case it rains. Well, that’s pretty legit, you know, it might, but some of our just in cases are so outlandish.

Kathi (07:13.486)

Mmm.

Kathi (07:17.484)

Yeah.

Kathi (07:22.168)

Mm

Kathi (07:29.152)

Right.

Kathi (07:34.988)

Mm -hmm.

Angie Hyche (07:35.446)

You know, to say, I’m going to keep six months of supplies just in case of a zombie apocalypse is completely different. So, so many times with each of these, we talk about, here’s what we’re saying. Here’s what we’re really saying though. And so with the just in case what we’re, think many, many times what we’re saying down deep is

Kathi (07:53.792)

Mm-hmm. Yes.

Angie Hyche (08:04.63)

I’m afraid. I’m afraid that if I let this go, I’m not going to have the opportunity to have it again. And ultimately, at its deepest level, it’s, God’s not going to take care of me. He does not have my back. And that’s pretty deep.

Kathi (08:06.304)

It, you know, yeah.

Kathi (08:21.294)

Yeah, long-time listeners of this podcast will know that I talk about the fear, guilt, and shame of clutter, fear, what if I need it someday, guilt, but so and so gave it to me and shame, I spent so much money on it. And like, those are the three reasons that we keep things are fear, guilt, and shame. And what you’re talking about here is a deep fear. You know, if we had

Angie Hyche (08:29.492)

Mm -hmm.

Yes.

Mm-hmm. yes.

Angie Hyche (08:41.677)

Mm

Angie Hyche (08:46.249)

Mm

Kathi (08:47.286)

grandparents who went through the depression, the thought, you know, and that’s been passed down to their kids and sometimes us, you know, you can’t throw anything away because what you’re saying is I don’t value anything and yet we just live in a land and a time of abundance. It’s not so much so I mean, there are people who let’s be clear, they don’t have enough food, they don’t have enough resources.

Angie Hyche (09:03.22)

Mm

Angie Hyche (09:08.46)

Yes.

Kathi (09:15.554)

But for those of us who are listening to a clutter podcast, that’s probably not the situation as much as it is. I don’t know what I have. So I have to buy more. so how do you start to, you know what, we’re going to take a quick break, but then I’m going to come back to you, Liana, and ask, how do we start to, I always call it, you know, I like to call it, how do we gently parent ourselves?

Angie Hyche (09:22.892)

Yes.

Angie Hyche (09:26.924)

Mm

Kathi (09:44.952)

to not be so hard on ourselves, but to say, there a different way of thinking? So I’m gonna come back and ask you that question when we’re done with our commercial. We’ll be right back.

Angie Hyche (09:45.029)

Mm.

Kathi (09:57.728)

Okay friends, we’re back and I just put Liana on the spot, because that’s what we do on a podcast about how do we start talking to ourselves in a different way? We wouldn’t tell our kids, don’t be afraid, just suck it up. But that’s how we talk to ourselves so much of the time, isn’t it? Like what you’re feeling is stupid, stop it. And we would never talk to a child or a dear friend that way, but we can be so hard on ourselves. So how do we start to…

Liana George (10:14.203)

it in.

Kathi (10:24.734)

unpack this fear that’s making us hang on to things that we don’t really need and start to have a new conversation.

Liana George (10:33.242)

Yeah, so one of the things that we encourage in the book, because this is one of our devotionals, you know, talking about these words. And so one of the things that we encourage people to do for the practical part of this, and like you said, to start talking to ourselves, is to write down what are the words that I do say? What are the words that I hear myself saying when I’m organizing or decluttering? And, you know, write those down and then write down

what do you think you’re really saying? Like Angie said a minute ago, what are we deep down really trying to saying to ourselves? And then write down, how can I reframe that question differently? And just by I think going through that, taking the time to go through those little steps, I think can help us really understand, wait, you know, this is, this isn’t what I meant, because, but because I’m acting out of this, either it’s

fear, confusion, misunderstanding, doubt, you know. And then once you can identify those, I think it’s easier for you to process that information and then start speaking differently.

Kathi (11:46.574)

So I’m going to give you some common phrases that I hear when it comes. This is like $60 ,000 pyramid. I’m going to give you the common phrase, and I need the response. OK, and I’m going to go back and forth with you guys. So Angie, we’re going to start with you. I just don’t know where to put it.

Angie Hyche (11:51.234)

Okay.

Angie Hyche (12:01.59)

Yes. All right.

Angie Hyche (12:07.0)

yeah. this is similar to, well, I’ll just put it here for now. this is, this is so common. And I think usually what we mean when we say that is, well, I don’t really want to deal with this.

Kathi (12:15.018)

Right, yeah.

Kathi (12:31.926)

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Angie Hyche (12:33.354)

And our excuse is, well, I don’t know where to put it. I don’t want to deal with this. And so then what ends up happening is that item becomes clutter because we put it on the kitchen counter or on the floor or whatever. it’s, it’s, it’s basically, it’s just kind of an excuse to procrastinate. so I think, when we do that, you know, I’ll do it later. I’ll do this just for now. Then many times the later never really comes around.

Kathi (12:49.837)

Yeah.

Angie Hyche (13:03.256)

And whereas if we take the time to do it correctly, then that clutter is not going to build up. know, our book is a devotional book and scripture and one of the scriptures that’s good for this one is Proverbs 13 for lazy people, what much, but get little, but those who work hard will prosper. Now, is it laziness in every situation? No, no, not necessarily, but sometimes it is like, just don’t want to deal with it.

Kathi (13:26.498)

No. Yeah.

Angie Hyche (13:32.994)

So it comes back to that principle that organizers are notorious for saying because it’s so important, having a home for everything. And if you have a home for everything, that pickup is just a breeze. Okay, here’s this. I know where that goes up. I’ll go ahead and… But it’s those items that we haven’t yet established the home for that end up becoming clutter because we haven’t gone through the thinking to try to establish that home.

Kathi (13:40.81)

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Kathi (14:00.314)

Yeah, I think very few people are actually lazy. I think that they are just so overwhelmed and it’s more of a mental exhaustion than it is a physical. You know, there are times when I’m like, yeah, I’m done for the day because I’ve been working hard all day and it’s like it is time for a little Netflix and you know, whatever I made for dinner. Yes, please. But I think so much of the time, you know, I look at these people who

Angie Hyche (14:05.418)

Mm -hmm. Yes.

Yes.

Angie Hyche (14:23.276)

absolutely.

Kathi (14:29.272)

who struggle with clutter and they’re not lazy. They’re loving their neighbors. They’re cooking for other families. They are working hard at work and when they get home, they cannot make one more decision. Liana, what do you do for the person who is like, I’m just overwhelmed? And by the way, I wrote a book called Overwhelmed and I think overwhelmed is a terrible term because

Angie Hyche (14:37.025)

Mm -hmm.

Kathi (14:57.41)

We can’t get to the heart of what it is, but when somebody’s overwhelmed, how do you determine what is it that’s at the heart of that indecision?

Liana George (15:07.728)

Yeah, I mean, like you said, I agree completely. Decision fatigue is a real thing. It is. And whether you have been busy all day working and you have to come home and you’re like, cannot make one more decision, or you’ve just been decluttering and you’re like, I do not know what to do or how to make any more decisions about my stuff. It’s a real thing. And we can become overwhelmed. We can become frustrated. And I think what we have to do is just when we get to that

We really just need to stop and we need to tell ourselves we’ve done enough for today and it’s okay. We can start again tomorrow. Or, you know, maybe we try not to conquer everything and we try to go for smaller portions so that it’s not so overwhelming and daunting. So I think we need to start small and I think we need to start small in places that are the most impactful.

So I think if you start small, it’s, I always tell people what small space can we change today that will make a difference in your life tomorrow? And sometimes that could be, maybe it’s the kitchen. I can’t get my family’s food on the table because the dining room’s too cluttered. Or maybe it’s just your bathroom sink where you get things ready in the morning with your hair and makeup.

So it’s just maybe starting something small. And I think just making those small little tweaks or decisions can make a big difference.

Kathi (16:39.33)

You know, I was just gonna ask Angie, but I feel like you just answered it. can talk more about this. But I think so often, part of the reason of our frustration is our expectations are out of line with our reality. That kitchen table took three weeks to get to that state. And we expect it to be cleaned up.

Angie Hyche (16:54.626)

Mm -hmm.

Angie Hyche (17:02.338)

Yeah.

Kathi (17:05.486)

in 10 minutes and we get frustrated with ourselves that we can’t do it in 10 minutes. It’s that all-or-nothing thinking. So Angie, how do we combat all-or-nothing thinking with being gentle with ourselves without beating ourselves up?

Angie Hyche (17:21.836)

Yeah. So I think I love how you came back to, know, most of the time it’s not laziness and I agree. and, but it’s also true that like the more frequently we do these little, I’m a big fan of daily pickup, like five minutes daily pickup. So if we’re doing that, even if it’s not every day, even if it’s three or four days a week, we’re spending five minutes.

Kathi (17:41.38)

Yeah, yeah.

Angie Hyche (17:51.376)

the amount of clutter will be so much less when we do get around to, to working on it. and I think that the key thing about these dirty words, whatever we do, they just leave us so paralyzed. And, and if we start saying, you, can’t believe you, you’ve let this go so long and, and, you’re the worst.

That’s just gonna leave us exactly in our tracks. Whereas if we say, okay, this is definitely not the state that I want it to be. I’ve let things go a little too long, but it’s okay. God loves me no matter what, no matter what kind of mess I’m in. So what can I do right now? What time do I have? How can I spend the next… How long do I… Let’s say I have five, 10 minutes. Okay.

Kathi (18:29.984)

Bye.

Angie Hyche (18:49.24)

If my goal is to get my family dinner on the table, can I spend five or 10 minutes clearing this space and then say, okay, so for the, for right now, I had to set these things over here just for now because we needed to eat dinner. So tomorrow during that time, I’m going to work on the things that I had to set aside and just, just forgive yourself for no one can keep up with that all the time. I mean, we look at these things on Pinterest or in a

Kathi (19:02.693)

Yeah.

Angie Hyche (19:18.228)

home magazines or look at that my home should look like that nobody’s home looks like that unless they’re just getting ready to have somebody over really influential you know it’s okay yes exactly

Kathi (19:22.735)

Nobody does, yeah.

Kathi (19:27.936)

Or they’re selling their house. Yeah. Yeah. So let me ask this question as we’re wrapping up here. You know, I’ve got people in my, well, I’ve got a lot of people in my life, because we run a big group, Clutterfree Academy. And, you know, people are so hard on themselves. But I also have people in my life who, you know,

Liana George (19:29.914)

Yeah.

Angie Hyche (19:50.7)

Mm -hmm.

Kathi (19:55.971)

well, of course my house is a mess, it’s always a mess, or they’re just so hard on themselves. And I try to come back with, it’s okay, you’re a wonderful person, let me help you, let’s figure this out together. And by the way, I’m sure people tell you this all the time, I could never have you guys, have you over to my house.

And I’m like, no, I’m the person you can absolutely have to your house because I’ve had to dig out of it. totally get it. So Liana, what do we tell to the person that we love that is, that is just, they, the dirty words are about them, that I’m a mess. I can’t take care of it. you know, my house is always a mess. There’s something.

intrinsically wrong with me. How do we speak life to that person that we love and we know that they’re a good person, but they do struggle with clutter?

Liana George (21:00.168)

And that’s really, I think, really, really important and that we do that. And I just want to say to your point of, you know, people saying, I can’t have you over. I always tell them I’m a judgment-free zone, right? Because like you said, there are times when my house is a mess and we all have it. But for those who are struggling with their identity in this organization, you know, one perfection is not a real thing.

Kathi (21:11.704)

Yeah, yeah.

Kathi (21:17.196)

Mm

Liana George (21:27.696)

You know, we need to let that go. But two, being organized is a learned skill. It’s like you said earlier, you know, nobody is born that way. is some that granted. I believe that there are some people who have a more natural tendency for it than others. But it is definitely a learned skill that anybody can learn to do. And so, you know, don’t be so hard on yourself because the other thing you have to remember is you’ve got your own organizing style.

Kathi (21:55.479)

Yes.

Liana George (21:56.378)

I think so many times people compare what they see on TV or in magazines and they think that they have to do it just like that. And when they do it just like that and they try it for a few weeks and it doesn’t work, then they are like, I’m a failure. See, I can never be organized. And that’s only because they just haven’t found the system or the style that works for them. And so I would tell them, be gentle with yourself and figure out what works for you.

Kathi (22:13.56)

Yeah.

Kathi (22:24.962)

Mm -hmm.

Liana George (22:25.626)

try something and if it doesn’t, you if you see that this isn’t working doing it this way or having them, you know, with lids or in covered bins, then you know what? Next time try using bins with no lids and clear bins, right? So you can maybe see what is different. And I mean, it took me, okay, I’m a professional organizer. It took me years to figure out my own children. They’re organizing style, right? And once I did, was like a light bulb went off.

Kathi (22:39.95)

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Kathi (22:51.522)

right? Yes. Yes.

Liana George (22:54.382)

And we could have peace in our house because I didn’t expect them to organize like me and I could see what their strengths were and they’re organizing and it made a world of difference. But it took us a long time to figure it out.

Kathi (23:05.782)

You know, it’s so funny. I just had a couple of people over at my house and they were cooking in my kitchen and they’re like, your kitchen is so organized. I can’t, you know, I, could never get mine this organized. I’m like, guys, it’s not that I’m more organized than you. I’ve been willing to rip out more systems than you have. And when I say systems, it’s not like I went and bought a system. It’s like, okay, well, these containers kind of fit here and I could put the lids over here.

Angie Hyche (23:25.471)

That’s good.

Kathi (23:34.614)

and let’s see if that works. And it didn’t work eight times, but the ninth time it did work. And it’s like, okay, if Rubbermaid ever stops manufacturing that size container, I have to start all over again. And you know, like if you move your house, if you move to a new house, you have to start all over again. But what you’ve learned is you’ve learned more about yourself as a person.

Angie Hyche (23:40.352)

Mm -hmm.

Liana George (23:50.897)

Yes.

Kathi (24:01.686)

Like what am I willing to put away and what am I not willing to put away? And I’ve just had to learn that I’m from a mixed marriage where I love putting away my Tupperware Rubbermaid kind of stuff because it finally works. And my husband would rather poke his eyes out than put that stuff away. And I’m like, you know what, for the sake of our marriage, just put it on the counter. I got you, babe. And so, you know, knowing that is good, right? And it’s good and it’s deep. Okay, you guys, this is a devotional.

Angie Hyche (24:02.434)

Mm -hmm.

Angie Hyche (24:23.405)

Mm -hmm.

Kathi (24:30.838)

It’s called Uncluttered, shaping your heart and home for what matters most. And guys, as we talk about all the time in Clutter-Free Academy, Clutter-Free for Life, and here on this podcast, the physical clutter is just one aspect of it. But instead of being overwhelmed, start searching for freedom. Start asking yourself questions, because here’s the thing, your organizational system does not define you, but how you approach your stuff.

Angie Hyche (24:45.933)

Thank you.

Kathi (24:59.522)

how you bring God into it and how you work towards peace really does matter. And this is an excellent guide and I’m going to, we’re gonna put the link in the notes so that you guys can go check it out at all of your favorite retailers, Amazon, all those favorite places. We will make sure that you get those links. Angie and Liana, thank you so much for being here today.

Liana George (25:24.408)

Thank you so much for having me.

Angie Hyche (25:24.62)

You are welcome. It’s been a joy. You know, when you were talking about so many times, that whole guilt and shame thing is so strong. I think so many times people will say, I’m not a good wife. I’m not a good mother. Because you look at my house, I’m not, you know, and it’s just, it can be such a stronghold emotionally. I came across someone’s work that I really liked, Casey Davis, her website is Struggle Care.

Kathi (25:32.866)

Mm -hmm. Yeah.

Kathi (25:47.202)

Yeah.

Kathi (25:52.943)

I love Casey. Yes. Yes.

Angie Hyche (25:54.646)

Yeah, but her statement, and I love to say every once in while, cleaning and organizing are morally neutral. That has nothing to do with who you are as a person. You are just as much a loved child of God if your house looks like insanity as you are if, you know, and honestly, like there have been times in my life when I’ve been too concerned with order and not enough concerned with like pouring love into my family. So

Kathi (26:01.356)

They are right.

Angie Hyche (26:24.0)

You can’t, know, it’s difficult to get that exactly right. And so much of it is trial and error. I tried this, this works, this doesn’t work. And it’s constant adjustment. We’re all works in progress.

Kathi (26:35.766)

Yeah. Yeah. And by the way, we never learned anything from perfect people. I only learned from people who are like, you know, like Casey Davis, who I’ve got one of those gripper things because of her for, you know, about two days a month. I, I call them my down days where I just don’t have a lot of energy. I don’t have a lot of strength, but I still want to get things done. And being able to have that little grabber tool.

Angie Hyche (26:42.804)

Mm.

Angie Hyche (26:51.138)

Hmm.

Kathi (27:05.454)

She does things that I don’t need to do because I don’t have a chronic illness, but she has like her laundry basket on wheels and she can scooch around in a chair. Like you do what you have to do. You ask for the help that you need. You bring in the resources that you can. And it doesn’t matter if your mom didn’t do it that way, your best friend didn’t do it that way, or the professional organizer didn’t do it that way. Whatever keeps your nose above water.

Angie Hyche (27:19.424)

Yes.

Kathi (27:34.828)

That’s the right thing to do. And I love that there is that grace in this book. Guys, thanks so much for being here today.

Angie Hyche (27:35.2)

Mm-hmm. Yep.

Angie Hyche (27:40.374)

Mm

Liana George (27:42.192)

Thank you.

Angie Hyche (27:42.838)

Thank you, Kathi.

Kathi (27:43.786)

Well, and friends, thank you for being here. You’ve been listening to Clutter -Free Academy. I’m Kathi Lipp. Now, go create the clutter-free life you’ve always wanted to live.

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  • The importance of community support during decluttering

Whether you’re a busy mom trying to reclaim your kitchen table, an empty-nester ready to part with decades of “someday” items, or just someone tired of feeling overwhelmed by stuff, this challenge is for you.

Join the Clutter Free Academy Facebook Group to receive your 30-Day 1K Calendar to help track your progress. Remember to answer all three questions to join the group! It’s how we keep it the nicest corner of the internet.

In this episode, Tonya mentioned the time she rented a dumpster. Listen to the original Episode 434: Do I Need a Dumpster?

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Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest

Kathi Lipp gives readers an easy-to-follow process for meal planning and prep, so that they can enjoy a full day each week of real rest and refreshment.

Could you use a break from cooking (and everything else) once a week? Not only is rest vital for your mind and body, it’s good for your soul too. God designed us to enter into Sabbath rest one day per week, but as you know, meals still need to be made. Your family still needs to be fed.

Sabbath Soup includes convenient, seasonal meal plans that take the guesswork out of shopping and cooking. More than just a collection of delicious recipes—including main dishes, breads, breakfasts, desserts, salads, sides, and yes, soups—this is your guide to establishing a weekly rhythm and routine of meal planning and prep that allows you to have a true day off.

Do something good for your soul and experience the peace that comes with a full day dedicated to spending time with God, family, and friends. Savor your Sabbath as you proudly proclaim, “Soup’s on!”

Order your copy of Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest here.

Links Mentioned:

Order Sabbath Soup here  and sign up to receive your free ebook featuring four week’s worth of easy meal plans and delicious recipes.

Episode 434: Do I Need a Dumpster?

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Meet Our Guest 

 

Tonya Kubo

Tonya Kubo is the illustrious and fearless leader of Kathi Lipp’s Clutter Free Academy Facebook group and the Clutter Free for Life membership program. A speaker and writer, Tonya makes her home in the heart of California with her husband, Brian, their two spirited daughters, and one very tolerant cat. Visit her at www.tonyakubo.com.

 

Tonya Kubo Picture
Transcript

Kathi (00:01.72)

Well, hey friends, welcome to Clutter-Free Academy where our goal is to help you take small doable steps every day to live with less clutter and more life. And I am here with my co-host Tonya Kubo, leader of all things clutter-free. Hey Tonya. Tonya, it’s our favorite time of the year.

 

Tonya Kubo (00:25.117)

Hey, Kathi!

 

Tonya Kubo (00:29.445)

It is our favorite time of the year. I was just about to say that.

 

Kathi (00:33.399)

Because we’re weirdo wackos. Yes, but 30-day 1k. What do those words mean to you, Tonya?

 

Tonya Kubo (00:36.969)

We are the Wackos.

 

Tonya Kubo (00:45.727)

That means in 30 days, we are going to eliminate a thousand pieces of clutter from our homes.

 

Kathi (00:53.152)

Now, Tonya, you’ve been doing this for years. Obviously, you have no clutter left.

 

Tonya Kubo (00:58.079)

Yeah, because we just live in a museum over here. You know us. Right? mean, the whole principle, if somebody is just joining us, right? If you are a veteran listener, you’re laughing with us. But if you’re just joining us, the clutter is never one and done. And I think that is the number one challenge for most cluttery peeps when they are new on their journey, is we really think if we declutter the right way, if we just do it right this time,

 

Kathi (01:04.29)

You

 

Kathi (01:12.728)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (01:28.179)

we’re never gonna have clutter again. And that is not how it works if you live with other humans or if you’re going through various stages of life. Like, I don’t know about you, Kathi, but every stage of life I’ve been in brings a different type of clutter into my life.

 

Kathi (01:43.852)

Well, okay, Tonya, so let me just get, we’re gonna dive into this, but let me just tell you what’s happening over here at the Lipp Household, right? So we’re launching a book and we have a retreat net, you know, in like a week and a half. And the book I happen to be launching is about cooking, right? So every appliance in the Lipp Household has decided to die at the same time.

 

Tonya Kubo (01:47.87)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (01:58.952)

Mm -hmm

 

Tonya Kubo (02:03.176)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (02:09.499)

yes, yes.

 

Kathi (02:11.144)

And we’ve decided to have a major electrical problem here in our garage, sure. And the people who installed our heating and cooling system, who I won’t say it here on, but if you are installing a heating and cooling system and the people you’re looking at start with a B, contact me first. Let me talk you out of that. But they have to come. So all of that.

 

Tonya Kubo (02:18.205)

Mm -hmm. Sure, why not?

 

Tonya Kubo (02:33.801)

Yeah

 

Kathi (02:40.344)

contributes to clutter. Plus, let’s just be honest, because I’m not cooking as much, we’re eating out a little bit more. And well, we’re eating in a little bit more. that causes it. just like life circumstances cause more clutter. so you just I, I have spent 50 of my 57 years thinking, well, next year, it’ll calm down. Next year.

 

Tonya Kubo (02:55.411)

Mm -hmm. Yup.

 

Tonya Kubo (03:08.732)

Mm -hmm.

 

Kathi (03:10.164)

you know, when the kids leave the house, it’ll calm down when, and yes, it calms down, but then other things ramp up and all of that contributes to clutter. So explain to us, Tonya, the concept of why, you know, that’s ridiculous. You should just be decluttering all the time. Why are you trying to declutter all that in one month?

 

Tonya Kubo (03:15.817)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (03:30.986)

Okay, so first of all, if you see yourself in any of those pictures, we’re probably not the podcast for you. But so from a very practical point, we do the 30 day 1K in the month of November, because we know regardless of how solid your systems are, a lot of stuff comes into your house in the month of December. And so it’s nice.

 

Kathi (03:37.4)

Probably not.

 

Kathi (03:55.468)

Yeah, it’s so true.

 

Tonya Kubo (03:57.983)

to not pile more on top of more and to actually reduce the amount of stuff that is in your home prior to this flood of things. Now I have younger children, I’ve been saying I have small children for so long, they’re not really that small anymore, they’re 10 and almost 15. So they come with a whole bunch of stuff, especially in the month of December. So the first reason is just to minimize what’s in your house before you get an influx of things. But the second is,

 

I think most of us, regardless of how we feel about our homes, spend 10 months of the year so in the thick of it we don’t really pay attention to what’s around us. And then November hits and we start thinking about Thanksgiving and we think about Christmas and you know, if you’re the kind of person who decorates you think about where you’re to put the tree. If you entertain you’re thinking about where you’re going to put all the people. If you don’t entertain sometimes you have fantasies about wouldn’t it be nice if we could entertain.

 

Kathi (04:55.64)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (04:57.215)

and you start to get really down on yourself. And so the 30-day 1K is a great opportunity to say, you know what, let’s take some massive action. Let’s get into motion so that we feel better about our surroundings on the end of the month than we do right now.

 

Kathi (05:15.288)

Yeah, and I’m going to add one thing that I’ve never really thought about before when it comes to November and December. We’re just spending a heck of a lot more time in our houses. And, you know, things that you can ignore when, know, nine to five, who works nine to five? Come on, nine to six, nine to seven, you know, like eight, you know, six, 30. Right. Exactly. That was yesterday, except it was seven to eight.

 

Tonya Kubo (05:26.494)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (05:34.975)

Hahaha

 

Tonya Kubo (05:39.155)

Seven to seven.

 

Kathi (05:44.536)

And we’re just spending so much more time in our houses. And like you said, we’re having more people into our houses. It’s time to really think about how those walls are kind of closing in on you and to create a little elbow room. So guys, this year, we are starting Friday, November 1st, 2024. And so that is our launch day.

 

Tonya Kubo (05:59.155)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (06:06.163)

Mm

 

Kathi (06:08.77)

But everybody likes to have a little ramping up, which we will do the few days before, you know, that Halloween week, we will be ramping up. To be a part of it, you need to go, and we’ll put the link down here, to Kathi Lipp’s Clutterfree Academy on Facebook and ask to join. And the most important part of asking to join is answering all the questions. Because if you don’t, we don’t let you in. It’s not that we’re being mean, it’s we’re trying to be really, really kind.

 

Tonya Kubo (06:13.289)

Yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (06:29.885)

Yes, please.

 

Kathi (06:37.944)

to the 15 ,000 people who have already answered the questions. And we want to make sure that we don’t have raggedy people in there. Okay, so Tonya, here’s my first question. Is it really possible to get rid of a thousand things in a month?

 

Tonya Kubo (06:38.879)

Mm -hmm.

 

Yes.

 

Tonya Kubo (06:46.057)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (06:54.911)

Yes, in fact, every, I have so many 30-day one case stories I can share from our community. So just let me know if you want another story. But so every year somebody says, well, I’ve been at this for three years now. I don’t have a thousand things. Or you know what? We did so much at the beginning of the year. I don’t have a thousand things. And then at the, usually around the 20th, they’re like, my gosh, I’ve already hit a thousand things. So part of it is we,

 

Kathi (07:03.103)

Yes.

 

Kathi (07:10.04)

Mm

 

Kathi (07:19.084)

Yeah, it’s crazy.

 

Tonya Kubo (07:22.801)

Everybody defines clutter differently. And I remember the first year we did this, I had posted a picture. We had done a dumpster, which we have prior episodes about that. We can link them. But I had gotten a dumpster to get rid of a bunch of things. And there was one person in Clutter Free Academy who was like, whoa, whoa, whoa. I thought this was about decluttering. Trash isn’t clutter. Clutter is only things that are usable. And I was just like, well, maybe in your house, but in my house, I am overwhelmed by trash. So I have a big dumpster.

 

That’s what I’m using, right? So part of it is how you define clutter. So for us, it is stuff that you do not love, do not use, would not, could not buy again. It’s very simple. If it falls under those three things, then it can be clutter. And I don’t care personally, and Kathi, I know you don’t care how you get rid of it, but here’s the deal. It has to leave the house. You can sell it. You can donate it. You can stick it on your curb or

 

Kathi (07:52.354)

Yeah.

 

Kathi (08:02.424)

Mm

 

Kathi (08:07.416)

Mm

 

Kathi (08:14.785)

Right.

 

Tonya Kubo (08:19.965)

You can throw it in a trash can or a dumpster, but it must exit completely to count. And now Kathi, yes, I want you to kind of share your perspective because what I have found in Clutterfree Academy is I am everybody’s friend in Clutterfree Academy, right? I’m their buddy. I am in the thick of it with you, with them, and you are the boss and nobody wants to take off the boss.

 

Kathi (08:25.929)

It’s so true. Yes.

 

Tonya Kubo (08:48.639)

So I need you to tell us what your non -negotiables are for the 30 day 1K.

 

Kathi (08:48.78)

Okay.

 

Kathi (08:53.688)

Yeah, so first of all, I want you to know it’s very, very doable because it’s only 33 items a day and all of us can do that. Okay, this is how I count things.

 

Tonya Kubo (09:02.825)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (09:07.769)

I was like, that’s what they’re afraid of. They do not want to upset Kathi Lipp by counting something that doesn’t really count.

 

Kathi (09:13.634)

Guys, it’s your house. The only thing I care about is that you live in peace. So this is how I count things. If you want to count a thousand piece puzzle as your thousand things, feel free, but that’s not going to get you towards peace. It’s just not. So I always think of it like this. If there’s a paperclip on my desk and I pitch it, that counts as a thing. If…

 

Tonya Kubo (09:18.068)

True.

 

Tonya Kubo (09:40.991)

Mm

 

Kathi (09:43.032)

If there’s a box of a hundred paper clips on my desk that counts as one thing every Decision counts as a thing so if you’re gonna get rid of a thousand things it’s a thousand decisions and That’s why this is so hard because it’s so hard making these decisions So if you’re making a decision, that’s a thing and it counts if you want to count the thousand piece puzzle

 

Tonya Kubo (10:06.036)

Bye.

 

Kathi (10:13.176)

pop off, but here’s the thing. I do not believe that that is going to get you to the place you want to be in your house. So if I was going to have one rule, every decision is a thing.

 

Tonya Kubo (10:25.991)

Yes. So I was going say, so that’s the big non -negotiable one, right? Because people will, we’ve had members in the past, it hasn’t happened in recent memory, I mean, we’ve had people paralyzed by the indecision of whether a pair of shoes counts as one item or two. And go ahead.

 

Kathi (10:38.626)

Yeah.

 

Kathi (10:43.594)

And so under that, I would say it’s one decision, because you’re not going to get rid of one shoe and not the other. It’s one decision. Yes.

 

Tonya Kubo (10:51.535)

Right. Yes, exactly. And so that’s, you know, I think that’s important. And the other thing, and you said this the very first year that Clutterfree Academy was open, so I don’t expect you to remember it. But, you you said like, well, you have, when it comes down to it, you have to decide what’s more important to you. Checking a box toward a thousand things or free, actually making an impact in your home. So back to the thousand piece puzzle.

 

Kathi (11:16.621)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (11:19.983)

If it’s that important to you to check off a thousand items on a thousand checkboxes by all means, but how much of an impact is throwing away one thousand-piece puzzle going to make in the landscape of your home?

 

Kathi (11:31.972)

It’s so true. Okay, so Tonya, I have a question for you. lot of people want to do this and they’re like, one, nobody will help me or two, I can’t get rid of other people’s stuff. So can you talk a little bit about that? Because Roger is on board. Like he’s sold out. We’re doing it. But you have kids. You have a husband.

 

Tonya Kubo (11:35.539)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (11:45.16)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (11:49.278)

Right.

 

Mm -hmm. Yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (11:56.445)

Mm -hmm.

 

Kathi (11:59.213)

And your husband was quite the collector when you got married. Okay.

 

Tonya Kubo (12:02.911)

he still is. I mean, the collection is dramatically diminished, but he still is a collector type. He likes to collect things. I think I have like, yeah, I think he has like 700 bottle caps on his desk right now. They’re yeah, like he has that thing. Like, I don’t know why I don’t get it. But you know, they’re in a vase. It’s his desk. He gets to do what he wants with his desk, which is it’s rule number one, right? I do not mess with other people’s stuff.

 

Kathi (12:11.02)

Yeah. So how do you deal with that?

 

Kathi (12:18.434)

Does he really?

 

Okay, yeah.

 

I bet it’s really cute.

 

Yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (12:31.871)

I focus on my own clutter and I let everybody else focus on theirs. How I have gotten my family enrolled from almost day one is I gamify the 30-day 1K. It is a family-wide contest. I print out our tracking sheet for the thousand items. There’s four people in my family, so this is actually very easy for us. It may not be easy for you, but I have four different colors of highlighters. Everybody gets a highlighter. If you have more people in your family, use markers.

 

Kathi (12:32.14)

Mm -hmm. Bye.

 

Tonya Kubo (13:01.651)

but everybody gets to mark off a box in their color when they declutter something. And at the end of the month, whoever has colored the most boxes, so whoever has gotten rid of the most stuff, gets to pick our reward. So we have done it in the past. We’ve done a whole movie day. And so, you know, that person got to pick the movie and then everybody gets to bring their favorite snack. So nobody’s punished for not decluttering the most.

 

Kathi (13:21.74)

Cool.

 

Kathi (13:28.354)

Great.

 

Tonya Kubo (13:30.491)

So we’ve done a movie day, we’ve done dinner out. I remember the first year I taught the girls how to make charcuterie and they all got to pick out a fancy cheese, which you know that was actually a very pricey endeavor. It’s cheaper to take those kids out to the movies. But I gamify it. I think one of the things that I would like to free all of our listeners from is decluttering does not have to be penance. It doesn’t have to be a punishment. You can incorporate joy into this.

 

Kathi (13:40.152)

Right.

 

Tonya Kubo (13:59.401)

whole experience. And so I want my children to have positive associations with decluttering. I don’t want them to be like, yeah, every time we decluttered, my mom made us eat baloney sandwiches and wouldn’t let us leave the house until the whole place was clean. I don’t want those kind of memories. So we make a game of it.

 

Kathi (14:15.757)

Right.

 

I love it so much. Okay, so we have the people who are like can I even find a thousand pieces of clutter in my house and the other people on the other end of the spectrum Dude a thousand pieces of clutter won’t even make a dent in my house so let’s talk about Those friends who are like I it’s not even gonna make a difference So my first thing would be to say you have to start somewhere

 

Tonya Kubo (14:23.519)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (14:32.799)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (14:46.814)

Mm

 

Kathi (14:46.89)

and a thousand pieces of clutter, especially in some of the in those circumstances, I would ask you to concentrate on surface clutter. I think for many of us, when we, you know, we’re like, okay, we’re gonna declutter a thousand things. And so we go into grandma’s China, like that’s the first thing we do. And it’s like, okay, that’s not gonna make as much of an impact as all the mail on top of your microwave. So.

 

Tonya Kubo (15:06.356)

Mm -hmm.

 

Kathi (15:16.244)

If you want to, and then I would also say if you have a lot of clutter, stick to one room for a while until it feels different, then move on to another place. What would you say to that person who says a thousand pieces are not gonna make a dent?

 

Tonya Kubo (15:26.495)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (15:31.433)

So what I actually hear in that question, Kathi, is if my house isn’t going to be company-ready, Pinterest perfect, there’s no point in starting. And my response to that is, but if you ever want your home to look like your fantasy home, your dream home, you have to start somewhere, and why not start now? I agree with you. I do advocate for starting in one room.

 

Kathi (15:42.775)

right.

 

Kathi (15:55.362)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (15:59.935)

A lot of times the daily challenges that we do for the 30-day 1K will hit various rooms of the house, right? Because what we’re our goal is to jog your memory to get you to think like, what can I get rid of in my kitchen? What can I get rid of in the spare room? But if you focus on one room, then you’re going to be able at the end of the month to go, wow, I’ve accomplished something. If you’re flitting throughout the house, you know.

 

Kathi (16:05.09)

Sure, yes.

 

Kathi (16:09.878)

Mm -hmm. Yeah.

 

Kathi (16:21.368)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (16:26.227)

Like Kathi’s point, I mean, you may have clear counters and a clear microwave in the kitchen. You may have clear coffee table in the living room, but you also just may not feel as accomplished as if you focused all your energy in one space.

 

Kathi (16:39.786)

Mm-hmm. Yeah, so I think People you know, we we talk about the concept of spending all your time saddling up like I’m gonna I’m gonna find the perfect system. I am going to color code I’m going to have different baskets for different things I’m following these six different decluttering systems that I found and I’m combining the best of all of them

 

Tonya Kubo (16:49.555)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (17:03.647)

Mm -hmm.

 

Kathi (17:07.212)

to come up with, and I’ve been working on this system for two months.

 

Tonya Kubo (17:11.529)

Mm

 

Kathi (17:13.28)

And I think a lot of us who struggle with perfection are waiting for the perfect system. And we are here to say imperfect action beats perfect inaction. And what I mean by that is don’t spend all your time saddling up, go somewhere. The most important thing is to get this stuff out of your house.

 

Tonya Kubo (17:21.214)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (17:41.599)

Mm

 

Kathi (17:42.302)

And when I say out of your house, it can go into the back of your car, but then the back of your car needs to be put somewhere. So, you know, if you, what, what do you say to that perfect, that perfect mindset? I mean, I know you just talked about that, but like just for the getting started, you’ve already talked about if it can’t be company perfect, I’m not going to start at all. So what, what would you say on day one to that person who

 

Tonya Kubo (17:48.713)

Exactly.

 

Tonya Kubo (18:04.67)

Mm

 

Kathi (18:12.148)

is like, but I’m going to make mistakes. It’s not going to be right. How do you help them, Tonya?

 

Tonya Kubo (18:17.135)

Right. Yeah, well, so I always tell people start small. And when we say small, we mean really small. Your very first day, I think the temptation is to say, I’m going to tackle this entire cabinet. I’m going to tackle this entire closet. Your very first day, I want you, if it’s the cabinet or the closet, I want you to just focus on one shelf. Like,

 

Kathi (18:25.954)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (18:43.229)

The top of the microwave is, if that’s where everybody drops mail and paperwork and stuff, the top of the microwave is your only job on day one. Okay, the kitchen table, it’s your only job on day one. That’s it. It’s not the entire room. It’s not every flat surface in the room. It’s just one single flat surface. Take a picture before, take a picture after.

 

Kathi (18:56.525)

Yeah.

 

Mm -mm.

 

Kathi (19:09.366)

Yeah, you know, I’m gonna give one other suggestion. know, you know, I’ve been in houses where the kitchen table would take a week. So here would be my suggestion for a space that even though it looks small is overwhelming, get some painter’s tape and section off that table into quarters or eighths, whatever you need to do. And just do the one section at a time. It’s going to be so much more manageable, so much easier. Okay, we’re gonna take a.

 

Tonya Kubo (19:18.174)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (19:27.081)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (19:31.464)

Mm -hmm.

 

Kathi (19:39.01)

Quick break and when we come back, we’re going to talk about where do you start? What do you do? We’ve already talked a little bit about it, but we have some tools that are going to help you get started. So we’ll be right back. Okay, friends, we are back and we’re talking about where do you get started? Tonya, my whole house is crazy. I don’t even know where to start. Can you please boss me around? Okay.

 

Tonya Kubo (20:01.383)

Yes, so we always say pick the room that bugs you the most. That’s your starting point. So it’s usually two different places. Place number one is where company might see. That’s usually where our members want to start because they want to feel good about having people in their home. But the other most commonly bothersome place is the place in the back of your mind that you were like, if I died in my sleep tonight and stranger saw that.

 

Kathi (20:14.103)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (20:30.171)

I would die a second death. Right? That is usually the number two. But I like to start in a public spot because then every day when I walk in the front door, I’m reminded of my progress. That is my favorite.

 

Kathi (20:31.756)

Mm hmm. Yeah.

 

Kathi (20:43.672)

Mmm, I love that and We also are going to be doing some challenges for you We’re so you need the most important thing is to stay active in the group So you can get those challenges. So, you know what’s going on and you can be there with other people you know what you’re talking about right there Tonya is the low-hanging fruit sometimes

 

Tonya Kubo (20:52.371)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (21:11.251)

Mm

 

Kathi (21:12.332)

You know, it’s the place that’s most obvious or the place the thing, you know, is going to be the easiest like right now in my entryway because we just got home from unpacking some stuff. There are some fruit boxes, you know, like the cardboard boxes you get at Costco and things like that. Like I could get five points right now by just going. That is low. I didn’t mean to do fruit boxes as your low-hanging fruit, but you know that will cement it in your mind now. Right.

 

Tonya Kubo (21:18.291)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (21:27.091)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (21:32.767)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (21:41.085)

Right

 

Kathi (21:42.048)

Yes, so there are things that need to be thrown away. There are things that you’re like, well, maybe somebody will eat that banana. That was your thought on Tuesday. It’s now Friday. Nobody’s eating that banana. You can you can throw that away. That stained t-shirt that you’ve tried to bleach four times and it’s not coming out. You can either you cut it up for rags, or I’m going to let you count it.

 

Tonya Kubo (21:55.775)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (22:10.057)

Mm -hmm

 

Kathi (22:10.196)

As a declutter I am because you’re repurposing it, and I love that idea, but get that low-hanging fruit, Tonya, let’s talk about how important is momentum and how do you keep it going.

 

Tonya Kubo (22:28.639)

Yeah, so the first thing, so I think momentum’s very important. So if you are mathy person, some of our members are mathy people, I am not a mathy person, but I’ve been doing this long enough to know that 33 items a day is about 250 items per week. And some folks really, because 33 items is not satisfying to them, they wanna do 250 in one sitting. And I…

 

Kathi (22:36.727)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (22:55.263)

I love that about you and at the same time, it is going to be a lot harder. It’s gonna feel harder to declutter one day a week to 250 items than it is to do a 10, 15, 20-minute session each day. So I think that’s part of the momentum is if you, know, six.

 

Kathi (23:11.5)

Yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (23:16.191)

say, hey, from 6 a.m. to 6 15 a.m. every day, I’m going to do my decluttering or from 2 15 to 2 30 every day, I’m going to do my decluttering and just make that happen. Then by the end of the month, you’re going to have a 30-day habit that has been built. And that is huge. And in terms of keeping going, can we just be honest that decluttering solo is not fun? OK, the demons in our head get really loud, I have found. And, you know, we start

 

Kathi (23:29.376)

Yeah. Mm-hmm.

 

Kathi (23:39.797)

It’s done.

 

Tonya Kubo (23:46.239)

We start with the negative talk. Like, how did I let it get like this? My gosh. Like, I remember the last time I cleaned this space and if I’d only kept it up and da da da da. And really in terms of continuing that momentum and keeping your motivation, that’s why we have a community. I love to say, know, everybody joins Clutter Free Academy thinking they are the only person in the world who has a clutter problem. And then they find out they’ve got about 15,600 or 700 friends or so.

 

who also think they’re the only person in the world who has this problem.

 

Kathi (24:16.918)

Right, you know, and so I also want to talk about momentum, but with a different take on it. So like one of the ways that I keep myself going when there’s a big decluttering is by putting milestones into my path. So I don’t even know if it’s milestones, but let’s say triggers in the middle of my path. So if I’m really working on decluttering for a month,

 

Tonya Kubo (24:24.936)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (24:39.411)

Mm -hmm.

 

Kathi (24:45.848)

Then every week I’m going to Goodwill to drop off clothes. Every week or maybe every other week, I’m going to the dump to do a dump load of you know things that have accumulated in my house Every week I am I’m going to challenge myself to post 10 things on our free cycle group or our buy nothing group. Like I am going to be doing this

 

Tonya Kubo (24:50.494)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (24:56.083)

Mm -hmm.

 

Tonya Kubo (25:10.323)

Mm -hmm.

 

Kathi (25:15.576)

I’m going to give myself some smaller goals and targets and go from that. Okay. If you are going through your house and you’re noticing like we’ve got all the Barbie stuff in the corner and I have not seen that Barbie move in 18 months. How do you talk to your kids? I know yours are a little older, but you’ve, you know, how do you talk to your kids about

 

Tonya Kubo (25:41.695)

Mm -hmm.

 

Kathi (25:45.174)

How do we consider if this is something we keep or not?

 

Tonya Kubo (25:48.625)

Yeah, so I always like, I will reframe the conversation and focus first on what to keep before what to get rid of. So I’ve never gone to my children and said, we have to get rid of stuff. Instead, I say, hey, you know, it looks like we have like more stuff than we actually have space for. What do you really love here? So if I found the Barbie in the corner, I would just say, hey, how much are we loving this Barbie right now? mommy, I love it, I love it.

 

Kathi (26:08.95)

Yeah, okay.

 

Tonya Kubo (26:17.351)

Okay, well, I noticed you haven’t played with it in a while. Is it because it’s not where it belongs? Or is it because you feel like maybe you’re a little too old to play with Barbies right now? And then, especially in the month of November, I frame donating as a way to play Santa for other children. And they get very generous when it’s framed that way.

 

Kathi (26:32.769)

Mm

 

Yeah, so great.

 

Kathi (26:40.892)

Yeah, because they can imagine where it’s going instead of into the void. Let me also talk about your adult kids stuff, your adult kids who have moved on. I will say, hey, you know, whether it’s my stuff that I think somebody in the family may want, or their stuff that has been left behind, I will often do it as a text.

 

Tonya Kubo (26:43.635)

Mm -hmm.

 

Kathi (27:09.208)

To say hey, you know take a picture text it over. Hey, is this something you’d like or I’m going to Goodwill can I go drop that off and? So that they know it’s a binary decision It’s not no mom. I want you to keep it because I can’t make a decision It’s either going to your house or it’s being donated because my house is no longer a storage shed for you.

 

Tonya Kubo (27:38.324)

Right.

 

Kathi (27:39.308)

But I also have to be okay with the no, don’t want it conversation. And that’s really hard for a lot of people because you remember that as it was in our house, Boo Blanky was this, know, Justin’s whole life was, you know, focused on Boo Blanky. And now you don’t want it. Are you kidding me? But it doesn’t have the same meaning to him as it does.

 

Tonya Kubo (27:46.526)

Yup.

 

Kathi (28:08.888)

I did at the time, but he is now he is now 30 years out from blue blankie and it’s okay for him to let it go. So I have to be able to say, do you want to keep this? No. Okay. Then I will donate it. I will throw it away. I will do whatever it needs to be done. And then also just making sure that you have an easy system that you are not recreating all the time. You know, we talk about the, you know,

 

Tonya Kubo (28:10.461)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (28:15.357)

Right.

 

Tonya Kubo (28:34.526)

Mm -hmm.

 

Kathi (28:38.539)

three totes and two bags. So there’s a garbage and recycling bag. There’s put away, giveaway and other rooms. And that helps you make decisions the whole time. Tonya, I wanna start to wrap this up. What will they experience in the free group when they join for the month of November?

 

Tonya Kubo (28:48.287)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (29:03.123)

Mm -hmm.

 

Yeah, so when you come into the month of November, be prepared. It’s a busy time, right? The challenge is a busy time. We have activity probably is like 3X, what it typically is, but you’re going to come in to the group and you are going to see before and after pictures showing all different types of living circumstances. We’ve got people who live in studio apartments. We have people who live in teeny tiny urban dwellings, people who have a lot, a lot of land.

 

a lot of open space and everything in between. have people who have several children. We have people who have no children, people who live alone, people who are, know, every age you can imagine. It’s always funny to me. Everybody joins thinking they’re gonna be the youngest person who’s ever joined the group and then they find out they’re not. Because clutter doesn’t, like clutter isn’t something that only becomes a problem after the age of 50, right? Many of us have a lifetime struggle.

 

Kathi (29:46.038)

Roommates, yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (30:00.467)

but you’re also going to get a lot of support. You’re gonna have me in there every single day supporting you. Kathi is gonna be in there multiple times a week. You’re gonna have Grace. Grace is our community manager over in our paid Clutter Free for Life membership, but she comes in. We’ve got Deanna and then our Clutter Free for Life members. This is what I love about our Clutter Free for Life members because they are the people who said, you know what? Like I can’t do this on my own. I actually need hand-holding support.

 

They come in and they serve as mentors. They help people. say, Hey, you know, I remember my first 30-day one K this is what worked for me. And it is just the most loving, accepting place for anybody who actually struggles with clutter. Now asterisk, big asterisk. If you are somebody who does not struggle with clutter, you are a born-organized person. Please do not join our group thinking you are going to tell everybody how to live right.

 

Kathi (30:54.967)

now.

 

Tonya Kubo (30:55.411)

Because we are the kindest corner of the internet for the cluttery peeps. We are not the kindest corner of the internet for the people who think they know better than the cluttery peeps.

 

Kathi (31:02.518)

Yeah, we just will kick you out. And the most loving, there are places for you. There are Reddit threads where you can go tell everybody else how to live. But Tonya and I do not do that. And we’ve made tremendous progress on our journey. But we don’t boss. I mean, we push you around in the kindest way possible, but it’s because you’ve asked us to. So there we go. And Tonya.

 

Tonya Kubo (31:13.012)

Yeah

 

Tonya Kubo (31:16.808)

No.

 

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (31:26.023)

Yes.

 

Kathi (31:29.91)

We’re going to do a little download for people who join the group, right?

 

Tonya Kubo (31:33.183)

Yes, yes. So every year we have kind of a different resource we provide for the 30 day one case so that people who are there every year have something a little different. But sort of this year what I have planned for our community is it’s the combination of what has been requested and served people well over the last five years. So we’re gonna have a calendar. It’s gonna give you what your challenge is for each day. And it’s going to have a spot where you can actually mark how many items you’ve decluttered.

 

for that day. So we have a separate tracking sheet that tracks you all the way to a thousand, but I think it’s important to be able to look at your calendar and see, hey, I was able to do 90 things on Monday. I did 10 things on Thursday. I’m still doing well. And so that’s going to be there for you to just give you that, individual guidance. I know it’s really hard, especially when you’re overwhelmed or when you’re starting out to go day by day, you need to be able to see a little bit ahead of you in the path. And that’s what we’re going to provide this time.

 

Kathi (32:31.774)

I love it. So guys, we’ll have the link below, but you can also just be on Facebook and do Kathi Lipp’s Clutter Free Academy and you will find us even if you just do Clutter Free Academy, you will find us. If you don’t know how to spell my name, it’s totally fine. But or check out the link below. Answer all the questions. There only like three, but we need you to answer them so we know that you’re our kind of people, which means cluttering and kind. That’s those are our kind of people.

 

Tonya Kubo (32:41.961)

Mm

 

Tonya Kubo (32:58.846)

Yeah.

 

Kathi (33:00.77)

Tonya, thanks so much for all your expertise today. Yeah.

 

Tonya Kubo (33:03.519)

Thank you, and one more thing, if you’re participating and you are a social media person, I wanna see #30day1K all over social media this year.

 

Kathi (33:10.506)

Yes. Yes, I love it. I love it. love it. I will make sure I am hashtagging up a storm. Friends, you’ve been listening to Clutterfree Academy. I’m Kathi Lipp. Now go create the clutter-free life you’ve always wanted to live.

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