We are taking a coffee break today (ha ha ha) with my friends over at Happy Wives Club!
Grab a cup of your favorite brew, and check out my article 3 Ways to Love Your Man When You Don’t Have 3 Minutes to Spare.
Tomorrow we’ll get back to our Coffee Series.
In the meantime, what are your favorite ways to show your man you love him in the midst of crazy times?
UPDATED 2016: We know it is not Valentine’s Day, but a spicy marriage isn’t just for the holiday. Create a summer lovin’ kit for the long summer nights to celebrate you and your man! Surprise your husband with a love kit and make it a summer to remember.
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I know that Valentines is over a month away, but I like to imagine that I’m a planner and not going to try to pull everything together the night before. So, if you’re interested in adding a dash of spice to your marriage this Valentine’s Day (and beyond) here is a project you can have as much fun putting together as you will have using. (OK, hopefully you’ll have a little more fun using it. But I digress …)
The Container
Find a decorated box, fabric bag, or any cute container that’s about the size of a shoe box. To do this on a budget, you can use a shoe box, but wrap it “soap opera” style. (Where you wrap the lid and the box separately with wrapping paper so it can stay pretty and be used over and over again.)
What to Fill it With
This is a list of items that can go into the box. Pick and choose those things you and your husband will love. Be playful! Have fun with packing it (and opening it)!
And if you wanted to make sure that your husband’s Valentines wish is fulfilled, (and you have someway for the kids to be occupied,) here are a couple more suggestions of some items to add:
A couple of thoughts:
*** The notes in the mailbox are all reasons I love my hubby. Here is my list. Feel free to totally plagiarize any of these for your own purposes.
And thanks to Fawn over at The Happy Wives Club for inviting me to link up today. Love her stuff. Check her out:
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We are so excited to team up with Proverbs 31 Ministries as they feature our very own The Husband Project for their online Bible study, June 20-July 22. Be Sure to sign up for the online Bible study HERE!
OK – so I get a little bossy when I’m blogging. But I really feel like all of us girls who are REALLY working hard to make our marriages better need all the love and encouragement we can get.
You already read my blog. And for that I’m glad, cause I’m all about taking those small steps to a great marriage. But as much I want to be all things to all married women, I cannot.
Here are a few people I’ve met along the way who encourage me in my marriage…
Fawn Weaver
Great Post: Becoming a Happy Wife
The Happy Wives Club Facebook Page
Why I love her: Fawn has literally traveled all over the world to talk with happy wives and see why they are that way. Her insights are fascinating, her writing smart, and her ideas practical. Love that.
Cheri Gregory
Great Post: Do I Think Like Lover or Mother
Cheri Gregory’s Facebook Author Page
Why I Love Her: Cheri is an expert on the personalities. (She helped me write 21 Ways to Connect with Your Kids focusing on the personalities.) She is married to someone with her opposite personality, and in her blog she talks about the real stuff of marriage. I always come away a little marriage smarter after reading her blog.
Sheila Wray Gregoire
Great Post: 31 Days to Great Sex is Here
Sheila Wray Gregoire’s Facebook Page
If there was every a girlfriend to give it to you straight (with enough humor to make you keep listening..) then Sheila is your woman. Love, love love her.
Darlene Schacht
Great Post: 3 Ways to Create Unity in Your Marriage
Time Warp Wife’s Facebook Page
Why I love her: Darlene Tackles all the issues of marriage (kids, house stuff, sex,) with love, grace and godly wisdom. You will be encouraged, and you will change something you’re currently doing.
Dineen Miller and Lynn Donovan
Great Blog Post: Redefining My Marriage
Spiritually Unequal Marriage’s Facebook Page
Why I Love Them: Dineen and Lynn have a great ministry to women (and some men) who are married to spouses who are not followers of Christ. I love their gentle, biblical approach to honor and love.
Q4U: Is there a great marriage blog that I missed that I should include in the next list? Tell me in the comments below so I can take a look!
Visit Kathi Lipp on Facebook here.
UPDATED: July 14, 2016: In the midst of The Husband Project online bible study with Proverbs 31, I wanted to share this older article with all my new friends working hard to love on their husband. It can be especially hard to know how to love on our men when he’s having a hard time. It can be depression, being overwhelmed, overly stressed, health issues, etc. As wives we CAN help even when we feel helpless.
I get some variation on this question a lot when I’m speaking: What should you I do when my husband is overwhelmed?
It could be because of work – or finances. Or there’s stuff going on with his parents, or in your family. Whatever the reason, we all know when it’s happening. Maybe he get’s really quiet and withdrawn. He may be in a place where talking about it (or just about anything,) is overwhelming. He’s exhausted, so either he sleeps all the time, or he doesn’t sleep at all.
You know what it looks like for your man. But when you see it happening, don’t just wait for the wave to pass. There are things you can do actively help your man during this difficult time.
1. Lighten His Load
Are there things around the house that your husband normally does, that you, (or an older child) can do for him right now? Even hiring a teenager to mow the lawn could be just what your husband needs to know that you’ve got his back.
2. Pray for Him
Here are eight verses you can pray for your husband, right now, as he’s feeling overwhelmed. I think it’s important to let your husband know that you’re praying for him. Roger walks with new confidence when he knows that I’ve got his back, prayer-wise.
3. Feed Him
I don’t want it to seem like I’m making our guys into cavemen, but there is something about knowing where his next meal is coming from that can really make a man feel more secure. If you haven’t signed up for my newsletter, you can right now and receive my e-cookbook The Ultimate Guide to Man Food for some inspiration.
4. Sex or Physical Touch
Again – not trying to go caveman here, but sex is (for most men,) the biggest tension reliever he will experience. Setting aside some time (and even asking your parents if the kids can have a sleepover,)will do more for your husband than just about anything else. However, if he is in a place that sex is even an area of discouragement, offer a no-strings-attached massage, or head, hand or foot rub.
5. Words of Encouragement
One of the reasons your husband may be feeling overwhelmed is that he is feeling undervalued. What can you say to make him know that he is valued and respected?
Want more ideas? Download my 21 Post-it-Note Encouragements.
Giveaway: July 14, 2016
Go to my Facebook page and respond to the question of the day for your chance to win a copy of Praying God’s Word for Your Husband.
Question of the day: How do you help your husband when he is overwhelmed by life?
Thanks for visiting (And even if you’re not here from Time Warp Wife, there are still free goodies for you! So keep reading!)
Let me give you the lay of the land. Just like at Time Warp Wife, we are all about the husband love. We show that in a variety of ways: but food and prayer seem to work around these parts. Here are a couple of resources to make that easier:
To Feed His Stomach
If you w
ant twenty of my family favorite ready for the freezer recipes, check out my Facebook Page and download the free ebook: Six Chicks Freeze and Fix – How to Start a Freezer Meal Co-op (look at the “Tabs” at the top of the page.)
Sign up for my newsletter (filled with great tips about keeping your life in order!) and you will receive my free ebook THE ULTIMATE GUIDE TO MAN FOOD filled with great recipes to keep that man in your life extra happy.
To Feed Your Soul
For Setting Up a Quiet Time Routine and Praying Scripture When Your Husband is Overwhelmed Downloads, check out my book page for Praying God’s Word for Your Husband.
And for my faithful readers, here is a new resource from my new friend Time Warp Wife: Just about the cutest Prayer Cards you have ever seen. Yes- she is giving away this free download to all my readers (and while you’re on her site, you can go ahead and just sign up for her blog. You’ll thank me later.
Enjoy the swag. We’re happy to have you as part of the family.
Dear Friend,
This is really, really hard for me to do, but I have to tell you why I can’t hang out with you anymore.
I get that marriage is hard. I do. I’ve fought with my husband (remember, when we got married, we had four teenagers, so we had plenty to “discuss” those first years of marriage,) disagreed with him, and sometimes (OK, many times) not been the wife I needed to be.
But here’s the thing: I want to do better. I want to be the wife that my husband needs. I want to speak well of him and to him. I want to improve, a little bit, everyday.
And when I’m around you, it’s hard. I feel like, because you are throwing your husband under the bus, you want me to throw my husband right under there as well.
I will not have the kinds of conversations that make men the butt of the joke, because not only am I married to a man, but I have two boys I want to respect as men as well.
I will not agree with how awful your husband is because I don’t know his side of the story.
I will not laugh at TV or movies that feature the guys as “Doofus Dads”.
I will not let you bait me into bashing husbands, yours or mine.
I’m sorry if this seems like a unexpected change up – like I’m changing to rules of our relationship. But that uncomfortable laugh that I make when you put down your husband? Gone. From now on, I’m speaking up. It’s not OK to talk about any man like that in my presence. Ever.
Now don’t get me wrong. If you want me to pray for the tough time you’re going through, if you want to cry on my shoulder and have me recommend books on how you can improve your relationship, I will bring the coffee, milk chocolate and password to my Amazon account. I am there for you friend.
But if you only want to complain, and not let God make a miracle out of your marriage, I need to step away. Because I need to be with women who support the men in their life. I want to surround myself with women who are not perfect wives, but will inspire me to be the wife that follows God and blesses her husband out of the overflow of that relationship with God.
So if you want to be that kind of girl – come on over to my house.
But if not, I’m going to need to bow out. I know that God wants more for you than what you have now. I’ll be here when you want that cup of coffee.
