by kathilipp | Mar 7, 2014 | Relationships |
I met my husband James in grad school where strangely enough, I studied alongside other students who had been Miss Oregon, Miss California, and even a future Miss America.
Let’s face it. We women are prone to comparisons. When I think about those beauty pageant winners, sometimes I don’t even feel like Miss Cul-de-Sac. I don’t think I could win a contest in housekeeping, beauty, or culinary arts. But you know what? Those titles don’t really matter.
After all, my dear husband didn’t pick a Miss (insert amazing category here). He picked me. For better or for worse. For dress-up date nights and sweatpants mom days.
And guess what? If you are married, your husband picked you too. Over all the other girls in the world, he chose you. (Hang on single ladies, your prince may be on his way too)
Instead of hanging your head down because your make-up isn’t perfect or you need a tummy tuck, put a smile on your face and your best foot forward.
You are fearfully and wonderfully made. That’s what it proclaims in Psalm 119. But I’m afraid many of us believe the opposite. We fear that we are NOT fearfully and wonderful made. If we allow it to, physical shortcomings can sabotage our ability to be happy in our own skin.
We all come pre-packaged with strength and weaknesses. Don’t fall into the comparison trap which quickly diminishes the wonderful gifts you offer to the world. Let go of your unrealistic expectations of “perfect” and appreciate what you have. Accentuate your strengths!
Listen to what God is asking you to do in your marriage, not what popular culture dictates you should do. You are beautiful in God’s sight and you know what? Your husband thinks you’re beautiful too. That’s why he chose you.
So tell me in the comments below the amazing qualities you have the your husband loves and chose YOU for. One reader will be chosen to win a copy of Arlene’s book 31 Days to Becoming a Happy Wife. If you can’t wait to read it you can buy it on Amazon now.
You have until Monday, March 10 to enter.
Arlene Pellicane is a speaker and author of 31 Days to Becoming a Happy Wife.
She and her husband James live in Southern California with their three children.
You can visit her website to Take the Quiz: Are You a Happy Wife?
by kathilipp | Mar 4, 2014 | Uncategorized |
Is it really possible to feed a family of six and have fun, all for fifteen dollars? I dare you to find out!
We found many benefits of trying to pack as much fun in with the least amount of money:
* Not only did Family Fun Night give us an opportunity to spend time together, it forced out kids to plan, budget, and take other people’s likes and dislikes into consideration.
*We found that when giving the kids the chance to plan and prepare, it helped them to enjoy the event a whole lot better.
* Having a limited budget has a special magical quality. There was no resorting to dinner out followed by a favorite movie at the theater. We found that we had to be creative.
And here are a few of those creative ideas:
Dollar Date Night – Have Costco hot dogs and then head to your town’s local dollar theater.
Karaoke Night – Borrow a karaoke machine or use your Wii, and make it an American Idol style night (but with only adoring fans – No Simon Cowell slams). Pair it with a Sushi dinner. For those less adventurous, their sushi can be made from cooked chicken, ham, or cheese on top of rice.
Airplane Food – Have a paper airplane competition. Set up a finish line and see whose plane gets the farthest. For dinner, have little packages of food ( cheese and crackers, carrots and ranch dressing as “airplane food.”
I know there are creative ladies (and men) out there. What is a cheap, but creative thing you do to spend time with your kids?
by kathilipp | Mar 3, 2014 | Uncategorized |
God gave the right parent to the right kid.
There are days when this statement couldn’t feel further from the truth. You feel ill- equipped to meet your child’s physical , emotional, and spiritual needs. Because , for the most part, you are. God wants you to rely on him and the people he’s surrounded you with.
You are not designed to do this parenting thing alone, even if you are a single parent. {click to tweet}
There are no gold starts for parents who never ask for help.
God gave the right kid to the right parent.
All those things that God needs to grow in you to draw you closer to Him? He sent those in a neat little package called “your child”. Each of my kids has taught me something about myself—often things I would choose to ignore if given the opportunity. I would have never thought that I had a patience problem, for example, until I had a patience tester named Kimberly. But there is no chance to ignore such things when they need to be bathed, fed, and loved pretty regularly. I had to confront the parts of me that needed desperately, to be more like Jesus—and often, I needed to confront my problems with a lack of patience before Kimber woke up from here twelve-minute nap.
Prayer is key.
For years, when a “kid issue” reared it’s ugly head, I would go to my mom, I would go to my friends, and I would go to my wall of “how to raise a great kid” books to find the answer. I needed answers, and I needed them quick! But as my friend Erin would say, “Go to God before Google!” When I did that, I was able to let Him direct me and be the parent I was created to be and I could connect with my kids in creative ways.
I will be sharing some of my favorite ways this month.
What is one unique way that you connect to your child?
by kathilipp | Mar 3, 2014 | Uncategorized |
by kathilipp | Feb 26, 2014 | Home |
Quadrant Clean –
Divide the car into four quadrants and do one quadrant fully before moving one the the next one. Otherwise, you will start at the front, follow along to the side, get distracted by the gum on the back of the car seat, start picking at that and the driver seat still has Wendy’s Frosty stickiness on it that need to be wiped off.
Three Box Reminder –
Do not forget your three boxes of PUT AWAY, OTHER ROOMS, and GIVE AWAY. You will also need your two bags GARBAGE and RECYCLE. You might have to use two mini boxes of PUT AWAY. One for the items like the good silverware spoon that has peanut butter with carpet pieces now stuck to it from a left over snack and another for the school report you just found three days late. The main thing is to get it out of the car!
Do I really Need it in Here? –
You need to be realistic but simplistic for this one. An extra a pair of safety scissors could be really helpful sometime in your car. And husbands often need that quick nail clipper time so a pair of those is fine, but four coffee mugs? Probably not.
By getting rid of extra clutter in your car, you will also be saving money since it will make the car more fuel efficient. {click to tweet} Sure, a few extra homework folders will not make much of a difference, but hauling those bags of used sports gear that you are supposed to drop off at the gym will make a difference.
And once you have cleaned it out, use containers to keep what you want in there neat and easy to find. My friend uses a cosmetics bag for all the restaurant gift cards and she keeps it in the glove compartment so anytime the family is out, they can go to the restaurant and have the coupon handy!
What are some organizing tricks that you use in the car to keep it swept out and clutter free?
by kathilipp | Feb 25, 2014 | Uncategorized |
For today’s challenge, we are talking about how to love your man with actions. I hit the streets … OK, I asked my Facebook peeps to write the blog post for me. How do you love your man with actions?!?
Here are 41 Ways that you said you love your man with actions
- Naomi Williams – Mine aren’t appropriate to post openly in the comments section.
- Heather Harbeke Prouty – Change the sheets regularly! Nothing like having amazing smelling sheets when it’s time to go to bed!
- Angela Springer Hood – I mailed him a thank you card full (front and back) with things I was thankful for that he does for our family.
- Olivia Myers – Clear the driveway of a million feet of snow (slight exaggeration?) before he’s home. This avoids tire marks … something he despises!
- Shirley Devuono Rempe – l making sure my kids are calm, the house is tidy (maybe not perfect but toys away, etc), and supper ready to eat when he gets home! Not always easy when i run a home day care, but I try daily to do it
- Vicki Limes One thing I do is have someone take my phone number to him. It might say something like this “You’re HOT! Call me 214-555-5555!” (My real number of course) I usually ask an older teen or young adult because it also reinforces to them the value of flirting with your husband!
- Nancy Whiting My husband gets up very early, so to make it easier for him, I have his work clothes put together in a ‘clothes package’ for him, and set on the table by the wood stove the night before so he doesn’t have to take the time to even have to think about it in the morning.
- Laurie Batdorff Hays Asking what would help him most at home. He may not care about something you think he does! Cooking his favorite meal. Time and space to collect his thoughts after work so he can switch gears.
- Melanie Barnard Witkovskie – I try to make his favorite meals and cook for him in general. I also try to make sure I don’t look like I just rolled out of bed when he gets home. Being a stay-at-home mom with a baby, it’s sometimes difficult, but I try to at least put on a little makeup and fix my hair! I want to look nice for him!
- Dana DeVries – I text him love notes while he’s at work. I became interested in football and basketball to cheer his teams with him. I ask him how I can pray for him and follow up on those things. I make sure to look him in the eyes and smile when he comes home.
- Traci Sheldon – I help him find reasons, resources and opportunities to do his hobbies. I also supported the remodeling of the “man cave” and did not complain about the cost or time it took to accomplish for him to have a space for himself.
- Sue Hall Walsh – I put sticky notes in his work bag, lunch bag or car to let him know I’m thinking of him during the day. It gives me the chance to let him know how much I appreciate him. Something I often think of after he’s left the house for the day.
- Lisa Evans Fulton – Last night my husband was snowblowing the driveway in the dark so I wouldn’t get stuck this morning, and he slipped and fell on his back. He insisted on finishing the job, so I passed some Advil out the window to him and then had a heating pad ready when he came inside and rubbed his sore spots. He insists on taking care of me .. .a few Advil and a heating pad hardly seemed like adequate thanks, but he was grateful.
- Karey Lehrman Spidell – Keeping his favorite snacks stocked. Making sure the lunch stuff is stocked. And easy to grab!
- Simone Dankenbring – My husband enjoys watching sports, especially the Blazers and Seahawks. I acknowledge and show how much I’m interested in something that he enjoys. I also keep him company and snuggle next to him during the games. When they win, I cheer along with him and when they lose, I always remind him that there’s “next time.”
- SueAnn Kavanagh I set the timer on the coffee maker, so when he gets up the coffee is all made! I know it is a little thing, but it makes his heart smile every time I do it!
- Susy Flory – Buying his favorite red licorice from the gourmet chocolate shop!
- Lisa Johnson Blose – Sleep on the couch because he works so hard during the week I don have the heart to wake him when he’s snoring. (He also will do the same for me.) Love my man!
- Bonnie Wild – Cleaning his trophy BBQ smoker so it’s ready for the next wonderful meal by the Bobby Flay wannabe (I say that lovingly).
- Tonya Walter – Make his lunch every day. Even when the kids are off school.
- Carole Landrith Hanna – Ironing his work shirts … without whining
- Anna McCullough – Ditto Olivia’s post about clearing the snow from the driveway before it’s driven on! Also giving him time to decompress when he comes home from work.
- Jeannette Shields I would eat a piece of fish for him … I hate fish but if he likes it, this is what I’d do, but definitely not all the time!!!
- Robin Lord Dilallo – I stop what I’m doing, if I can, and help him with whatever is stressing him out at the moment. Wallet? Keys? Need to talk after a tough day?
- Chris Moss – Today I had the emissions test done on my husband’s car and registered it at the MVD. Then I had it washed, buffed and hand-waxed.
- Michelle Brown – I like to leave frequent voice mails for him to thank him for providing for our family and wishing him a great day! Once in awhile I will deliver a milkshake or smoothie to him in the middle of the work day.
- Melissa D. Gillispie – My husband and I are a team. I cleaned the kitchen while he helped our daughter with her homework. He always has a clean bathroom.
- Angie Bell – He likes when I go outside and shoot hoops with him. He loves basketball and he loves me. Double bonus.
- Cathy Lo Davis – He loves freshly brewed ice tea, so I make sure to have the pitcher full when he comes from from work.
- Tanya Aitken – I have his favorite drink in the freezer so it’s nice & cold (usually tea) waiting for him. I set a pair of his comfiest lounge clothes on the bed and when he walks in, I don’t say anything. He gets dressed and walks out with a smile, as I hold out his drink for him. He smiles and says, you did it again.
- Heidi Bonner – Actually doing those small jobs he asks me to do.
- Heather K Seay – Feed our animals (3 outside dogs and 1 cat). A chore he despises.
- Jamie Jerome – I stock up on his favorite cut of meat in advance, when on sale, make beer bread in advance and freeze it, and make sure that his favorite brew is on hand. (Plus, it’s fun to be preggers and at the liquor store. People are hilarious.) This keeps us ready for a “stay home date” any night for 30 minutes or less. He also won’t go to bed until things are picked up and tidy and the dishes are done even if he is coming off an 18 hour shift. So on nights I know he won’t have energy left, I do it, no matter how exhausted I am from my day.
- Sara Graham – I baked brownies filled with Reeces Peanut Butter cups and Reeces Pieces. I also made fancy sandwiches for his lunches and had coffee ready in a travel mug. Also I cleaned up some of the things around the house that drive him crazy
- Jo Leneb – Make sure there is always something in the fridge for lunches and snacks.
- Renee Simpson Holden – Taking out the trash, instead of asking him to do it.
- Pam Wood Humphrey – Polish his shoes.
- Amber Schumacher – Picking up dog poo before he gets home! Making his coffee and setting the timer so he wakes up to fresh brewing coffee. Making his lunch for the next day (something out of the norm).
- Christie Terry McKay – Buying his favorite snacks and candy and giving him time to decompress every day when he comes home from work.
- Emily Wilkerson Wilson – Take out the trash so he can sleep 10 more minutes.
- Lindsey Cuartilon – This is good stuff! All I can come up with is that I don’t run away and leave him with all these kids! Lol.
So, there you have it — 41 ways to love your man with actions. Tell us in the comments below how your love your man with actions.
by kathilipp | Feb 24, 2014 | tips and ideas |
Last January, Kathi issued a de-cluttering challenge that motivated me to finally gut my garage.
Now I don’t have an organized bone in my body; I’m the total “Queen of Chaos” type.
But by the end of the month, I’d taken several car-loads to Goodwill, sold a handful of items on eBay, and thrown out an astonishing amount of trash.
Here’s what worked for me as I transformed our garage from catastrophe to functionality.
Step 1: Determine your priority needs.
We don’t park our cars in our garage. Our top priorities are:
a) Plenty of space for Daniel’s workbench and tool cabinet
b) Easy access to the elliptical and Daniel’s weight bench
c) Easy access to frig and pantry
d) Easy entry/exit for cats
Your priorities are probably different from ours. Once you know what they are, they will guide all the rest of your decisions.
Step 2: Loan useful items that aren’t getting used
Check the layer of dust on all meant-to-be-used items. This includes, but is not limited to: golf clubs, backpacks, and sewing machines. I loaned my high-end serger, which I’d not used in six years, to a co-worker. She’s put it to good use, cranking out dozens of blankets and hats for homeless shelters.
Step 3: Evict all occupants of the “Needs Repair Graveyard”
Yes, I know, they could be repaired. And you probably would, if only you had time. But if you haven’t yet, chances are you won’t. Say farewell. I promise you won’t miss them…or the guilt you feel every time you walk by and hear them whisper “fix me!”
Step 4: Consolidate and strategically store holiday decorations
If your holiday decor has multiplied over the years until it’s taking over several separate sections of the garage, it’s time to rein it in. Take the time to sort through it with a critical eye. Give-away anything you don’t love, and store the keepers in containers you can move without help or injury.
Step 5: Check and chuck old paint cans, cleaners, and other chemicals
Rust or dust on any of these means they’re not getting used. Properly dispose of any that are expired or beyond use. Give yourself 3 months to use or give away anything that’s still good. (Highly Practical Hint: Consider storing touch-up paint on a high cupboard shelf in the room it matches!)
Step 6: Flatten and recycle boxes
I know how hard it is to get your hands on good boxes when you need to ship something or when it’s time to move. I also know how “good” boxes can overcrowd an otherwise spacious garage! At the very least, flatten them; they’ll take up lot less space, and you can re-build them as you need them.
Step 7: Toss trash
This step seems like such a “no duh,” but it’s amazing how quickly trash accumulates. Do you have a good-sized trash can in your garage? If not, get one and keep plenty of bags near it.
Cheri Gregory is a Certified Personality Trainer; contributor/co-author of a dozen books, including 21 Ways to Connect With Your Kids (with Kathi Lipp); and frequent speaker for MOPS groups, women’s retreats, parent workshops, and educational seminars. Cheri has been “wife of my youth” to Daniel a pastor, for over a quarter-of-a-century; they have two college-aged kids. She blogs about expectations, “baditude”, and hope at www.CheriGregory.com.
Sign up for Cheri’s new blog and receive a free download of 50 Ways to Leave Your Clutter!
by kathilipp | Feb 19, 2014 | Home |
So you’re knee deep in your piles of things to get rid of for the 2014 Things Challenge.
The Problem – some of this stuff is worth some real money!
While it’s great to be generous (and let’s face it, it’s a lot less hassle to give stuff away than to sell it) sometimes it’s worth the time and effort to sell those things off and do wild and crazy things with your money, like feed your family…
I also believe in selling off a variety of “things” in order to get the “one thing” your family needs. Last year I sold dozens of books on Amazon in order to put the money toward a juicer that we wanted for our health plan. I haven’t missed one of those books, but the juicer is now a beloved part of our family.
So here are just a few ways to get rid of the stuff you need, and get some cash along the way:
The first way to make money from your unwanted goods is Craigslist. This is like the greatest garage sale you could ever hold and the buyers are at your fingertips on the computer. Although you do the selling and shopping online, the buyer meets you at an arranged location. There are some very specific tips to help you out like taking good photos and writing an accurate description of the item. These tips from the Money Saving Mom site will help you to save time and make money without hassle.
When setting up a meeting place, make sure it’s always a populated area or if it’s an item you have to have picked up at your home, make sure your husband or a beefy male friend is on hand. I sat on a jury where a fake Craigslist ad was posted for the sale of a car. The meeting took place at the end of a court and the men “selling” the car were waiting for the buyer (who brought cash” with guns. My son purchased a car through Craigslist the same week I was on the jury (and I was forbidden from talking about the case,) but he took his dad to the meeting – in front of a local Target store.
Selling things on Ebay is another easy way to get rid of your extra things and make money. Ebay is a website that allows you to download photos and descriptions and you are responsible for shipping the item to the buyer. The most important thing to remember is to do your research. Every detail you put into the description will help the buyer know exactly what they are buying and will be more likely to pay more money for your item. It is also important to time it right. Selling that Mickey Mouse costume in the middle of the winter will not be quite as lucrative as selling it in the beginning of October in order to get the money saving mamas buying for Halloween. Ebay selling tips like setting reasonable prices or having your shipping supplies ready ahead of time will help you get more money for your clutter.
The last way to make money from getting rid of your stuff is a feel good way – donating. The IRS rewards generosity with money-saving tax perks for certain charitable contributions. As in the other ways, research is very important in knowing the cost of the items you are giving away. It is also crucial to decide on a place where the organization wants you items and will be able to use them.
Next week we’ll be talking about how to get the whole family in on a garage sale and make even more money from all of your stuff!
Whichever way you choose, do your research so you know that your time invested is worth the money you will get. The good news is that you really can make money selling your stuff. What is a another way that you make money getting rid of your stuff? Tell me in the comments below and you will be entered to win Wisdom Meets Passion by Dan Miller!!! Just one of the 52 books from my library I’m giving away in 2014!
by kathilipp | Feb 18, 2014 | Home |
We are spreading the 2014 Things Challenge LOVE all over the web. If you are stuck trying to figure out what should stay and what should go, head over to my post today on Upgrade with Dawn. This little checklist of how to make decisions with your stuff will get your from Stuck to Stuff-Free in no time!
by kathilipp | Feb 17, 2014 | God, Me |
Friends, it’s Kathi here- I’m sure most of you know my sweet friend Renee Swope from Proverbs 31 or her wonderful radio spots heard absolutely everywhere. (Sometimes I’m sitting in the passenger seat swearing to Roger that I’m hearing voices – it’s just Renee talking to me through the radio.) Make sure you read down to the end of the post where Renee has several ways for you to win some of her latest resources.)
It had been a hard day, running too many errands with two small children. My three-year-old didn’t understand why we couldn’t buy every toy his tiny hands could touch. And he kept getting in and out of the grocery cart, and whining when I tried to stop him.
I was not a happy mama and wondered how all the other moms in the store seemed to know what they were doing.
Their children listened when they told them no and they wore matching outfits, too. I wondered how in the world those women pulled it off with a smile. I could barely get a shower, get my kids dressed and get us out the door before lunch.
When we got home that afternoon, I went looking for pink construction paper so I could write “I QUIT” on it and turn in my “pink slip” to my husband J.J. when he came home from work. I was tired of feeling like such a failure as a mom.
I couldn’t find pink construction paper, so I decided to pull out my journal. Filling blank pages with scribbled thoughts, I wrote:
I hate who I have become. I’m such a horrible mom. Why didn’t someone tell me how hard this was going to be? I’m frustrated with my kids and myself. I have no patience and I don’t know what I am doing! I feel guilty all the time. I couldn’t wait to be a mom and now I want to quit.”
Just as I finished writing that sentence, I sensed God whispering to my heart: Renee, You are so critical of yourself. You focus on your mistakes and beat yourself up with accusation and condemnation. Those are not My thoughts …”
It felt like a dam broke in my soul as I choked out the words, “God, I can’t do this. It’s just too much for me”
And in that place of surrender, Peace came over me. His gentleness calmed my nerves. It felt like God bent down before me to listen, and spoke to my heart: You are right, Renee. In your strength and through your perspective, you can’t do this. But with My promises, My presence and My power – all things are possible. I will help you.
Looking back on that day, my heart can’t help but echo the words of the Psalmist: “Because he bends down to listen, I will pray as long as I have breath!” Psalm 116:2 NLT
When we acknowledge that we are a mess on our own, God rushes to our side to help us. He bends down to show us that with His help, wisdom and guidance, we can become the confident praying mama we long to be, and the confident mom HE created us to be!
When I say… I can’t do this, God says… You can do all things through Christ who gives you strength. Keep praying and depending on Me for help.
“I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” Philippians 4:13
Today’s post from Renee Swope is a partial excerpt from her new A Confident Heart Devotional book. Used with permission from Revell Books.
Renee and JJ Swope have been married for over 20 years. They have three children: Joshua (19), Andrew (16) and their sweet Ethiopian princess who they brought home in 2009, at the age of 10 months. Renee is also a best-selling author, speaker and radio co-host with Proverbs 31 Ministries. The Swope family lives in North Carolina and she blogs at www.ReneeSwope.com.
About Renee’s NEW Confident Heart Devotional:Does self-doubt ever make you question your ability to be a good mom? Expanding on her best-selling book, A Confident Heart, Renee Swope has written a new 60-day devotional that will encourage, empower and equip you to live confidently in your God-given roles, relationships, and responsibilities! Each devotion also features a “When I Say…God Says…” statement with a Bible promise and a prayer to guide your thoughts and emotions that day. Plus you’ll LOVE an easy-reference chart that includes all sixty ”When I Say…God Says…” statements for days when you just need a promise to hold onto!
ENTER TO WIN 2 copies of Renee’s A Confident Heart Devotional book. Leave a comment below and let us know what friend you’d give it to and why, if you won 2 copies. Contest ends on February 20, 2014. CLICK HERE to find out how you can WIN a $50 gift card, 2 additional signed copies of Renee’s A Confident Heart Devotional book, and more!
