by kathilipp | Feb 8, 2016 | Clutter Free |
Guest post by Cheri Gregory
My Clutter Free journey began in my bedroom.
Like many clutterers, I’d spent decades using our master bedroom as the “just throw it all in there and slam the door” stash-and-dash solution when company was due in an hour.
But discovering that I’m an HSP—a Highly Sensitive Person—has transformed how I view my bedroom.
HSPs are easily overwhelmed by sensory stimuli.
We need to create ourselves a sanctuary, a safe quiet place of refuge where we can seek shelter when the world overwhelms us.
When we ask ourselves, “How can I make my bedroom a true sanctuary for my tired body and soul?” the obvious answer is to first oust every ounce of clutter.
HSPs process an overabundance of disorienting visual stimuli all day every day. The last thing we need are piles of confusing clutter visually assaulting us in the one room we retreat to for safety.
Moving Past Our Stories to Sanctuary
Of course, clutter rarely leaves without a fight. Thanks to our extra-strength HSP consciences, the three stories Kathi says all clutterers tell themselves can feel especially like gospel truth to us:
“I need to keep this just in case”
When you tell this fear-full story, you let fears from your past control your future.
“But so-and-so gave it to me!”
In this guilt-ridden story, people from your past (who aren’t concerned about you, just how you make them feel) are allowed to control your future.
“But I spent so much money on it!”
This shame-filled story allows a mistake from your past to control your future.
As these stories come up, we can respond with compassion and permission.
Compassion for our feelings of fear, guilt, and shame.
Permission to keep only what we need and want.
Making Your Bedroom an HSP Sanctuary
Once the clutter is out of your bedroom, grab a pad of paper, a favorite pen, and sit down on your bed.
Write these four senses at the top of different pages: touch, sight, sound, and smell.
Look around the room and ask yourself, “What do I want in my bedroom? What sensory experiences are especially soothing, relaxing, and restful for me?”
Ponder each sense for a few minutes and write down what comes to you. Here are some questions I’ve asked myself:
Touch
- What textures do I love?
- Smooth high thread count Egyptian cotton sheets?
- A soft blanket, knit with slubby yarn?
- What temperature(s) help me relax and sleep? Do I need:
- An electric blanket?
- A cooler grade of comforter?
- A heating pad or Thermaphore to ease my back pain?
- A rotating column fan?
- What skin products do I want to keep in my nightstand?
- Hand moisturizer?
- Lip balm?
- Nail clipper and file?
Sight
- What colors are calming for me?
- What patterns — or lack of pattern — do I prefer?
- How well are the lighting options working for me?
- Can I make the room as light as I want it?
- Can I make the room dark as I need it?
Sound
- How can I block out disruptive sounds?
- Earplugs?
- Noise-cancelling headphones?
- How can I bring in pleasing sounds?
Smell
- What scents irritate me, giving me headaches or making my face flush?
- Might I want to try unscented detergent, softener, and dryer sheets with my bedding?
- Could I natural citrus cleaning products?
- Can I find fragrance-free candles?
- What scents relax and sooth me?
Make a wish list of what you want and need to add to your bedroom sanctuary.
But no frantic shopping spree to buy a peaceful bedroom all at once.
Reign in your HSP intensity, say “no” to Perfectionism, and commit to adding new items gradually, enjoying them one at a time.
Using Your Bedroom as an HSP Sanctuary
Decluttering your bedroom will not automatically transform it into a sanctuary. Your bedroom will become your sanctuary as you seek sanctuary in it.
This also takes compassion and permission.
Compassion, rather than criticism, for your HSP self.
Permission to be tired, to need quiet, rest, and refuge.
If you find yourself resisting rest, remember that Jesus himself invites you to rest…
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened,
and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me,
for I am gentle and humble in heart,
and you will find rest for your souls.
Matthew 11:28-29 (NIV)
…and say “yes” by taking refuge in the One who offers true rest.
Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the Lord,
“He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.”
Psalm 91:1-2 (NIV)
*****
Wondering if you, too, might be an HSP?
Subscribe to Cheri’s blog and receive your FREE “HSP–Who, Me?” PDF!
by kathilipp | Feb 5, 2016 | Friday Favorites, Love Your Husband, Marriage |
Considering something different this Valentine’s Day?
Tired of giving the same old thing?
Here are some ideas on how to show your love, devotion and creativity this February…
For Your Best Friend
- New gloves. If you live where it is cold, a nice pair of gloves is welcomed. You can include a note, “Thank for always ‘giving me a hand’ when I need it.”
- Who can resist hand-dipped chocolate covered pretzels? They are easy to make, just dip in chocolate and add heart shaped pink and red sprinkles. Wrap in a plastic bag with a red ribbon and you have a wonderful gift. Don’t have time to make your own, most grocery stores now offer similar treats.
- If you have a friend that collects things, buy something to add to her collection. My friend collects old dishes. You can often find amazing dishes at a yard sale or thrift store, I add some candy or handmade soap to the dish and tie with a
fabric ribbon.
- Purchase some Chap Stick (my favorite is Burt’s Bees brand in pink grapefruit flavor) tie it with a ribbon and a note
saying, “I’ll always “stick” by you!”
- Put a mini Hershey Bar, two graham-cracker sticks and a marshmallow in a little bag, tie with a ribbon and a note to the top that says, “I need S’more People Like You”.
- Find a picture of the two of you over the years and have it enlarged and framed. (I personally love this type of gift.)
For Your Kids
- Plan a game afternoon or night, prizes for the games involve chocolate or other valentine candy. You could also use Hershey Kisses or Miniatures as the game pieces.
- Spend time together creating a Valentine craft. Instructions for all kinds of fun decorations and skill levels can be found on Pinterest.
- Volunteer your time together at a local animal shelter or other community organization that could use some extra help. Most kids love animals and giving of themselves is a great way to give back and learn about love.
- How about treating the kids to an experience they have been wanting to participate in. Maybe bowling, roller skating, snowboarding, skiing, or other physical activity. Maybe it is going to the ballet, a movie, concert, or a play. Experiences make memories and we all want to give our children great memories.
- Speaking of experiences, how about giving them their own “Tea Party” complete with homemade heart shaped cookies and hot tea. They can invite a friend or two or just include family and the stuffed animals.
- Teenagers love gift cards to their favorite store or how about a new set of ear phones or other tech device. Maybe a new app for their phone.
For Your True Love
- Diamond stud earrings (In case my husband is reading this article….)
- A subscription to audiobooks, Netflix or Spotify.
- A handwritten letter with the reasons you love him or love being married to him.
- Create a work of art for his desk. You can find lots of ideas on Pinterest.
- Tickets to his favorite event, sporting match, or game. Whatever he loves, get tickets and go with him and enjoy.
- Make a home-cooked meal. Spend time making the food he enjoys and set the table for the event. Make it a special occasion.
- Make his favorite snack. Whether it is chocolate chip cookies or homemade fudge, make a batch just for him.
- Cover his mirror with red post it notes with reasons why you love him.
- Plan a special weekend. Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday. If your budget allows include a hotel. If it doesn’t, no big deal just plan events throughout the weekend the two of you can do together. But you make all the plans and reservations. It could include doing something you both love, visiting a place you both have been talking about, eating out, laughing, and just enjoying each other’s company for a whole weekend.
Valentine’s Day is a time to show the people you love a little extra attention. It doesn’t have to cost a fortune. Just be sure you take the time to celebrate the “day of love” with them.
*Photo credit to Robin O’Neal Smith
Want more ways to build up your marriage?
My newest book just came out this week! I teamed up with my friends (who just happen to be relationship authors and speakers) Fawn Weaver, Shaunti Feldhahn, Sheila Wray Gregoire, Renee Swope, Crystal Paine, Michele Cushatt, and others, to bring you
101 Simple Ways to Show Your Husband You Love Him that will inspire you to nurture your man and foster a lasting, loving, and fun-filled relationship.
by kathilipp | Feb 4, 2016 | Love Your Husband, Marriage, Relationships |
When I talk to women about what they want to improve in their lives, so many say something along these lines: “I want to focus on my husband this year. And I want to finally get organized. And lose weight!”
OK – so I may not be able to help you with the weight thing. But what if told you that you could improve both your marriage and your home at the same time?
It turns out that the state of our clutter and the state of our marriage could be more closely tied than we ever imagined.
In my book Clutter Free: Quick and Easy Steps to Simplifying Your Space I site a study from researchers at UCLA’s Center on Everyday Lives and Families (CELF) that looked at the relationship between thirty-two California families and the thousands of objects in their homes.
To the surprise of no woman reading this, clutter has a profound effect on our mood and self-esteem. CELF’s scientists found a link between high cortisol (stress hormone,) levels in female home owners and a high density of household objects. In other words: [Tweet “The more stuff, the more stress. #clutterfree”]
And we all know, if I’m not happy, that is going to have a profound affect on my marriage- and my husband.
There are some areas of your marriage where it takes two to pull off a big relationship boost – but when it comes to clutter, one person can make a huge difference.
If you are just starting this decluttering journey, let me tell you the two areas to concentrate on right now:
- The space that you greets you when you come home.
My hope for every couple is that their home is a haven for your marriage. I want you and your man to walk into your house after a long day fighting the battles of the world, and land in a soft place – your home.
But that only works if you don’t have chaos and distraction greeting you as you hit the door.
Wherever your first glimpse of home is at the end of the day, make sure that is rises up to greet you.
- Your bedroom.
If your home is your haven, I want your bedroom to be your nest. That place that blocks out everything from the world and is all about you and your man. That’s hard to do when you have to unbury your bed every time you want to cuddle up.
Don’t rearrange clutter, get it out of your house.
Clutter is anything that hasn’t earned the right to be in your home.
Create a home that is a haven for your marriage.
Want more ways to build up your marriage? My newest book just came out this week! I teamed up with my friends (who just happen to be relationship authors and speakers) Fawn Weaver, Shaunti Feldhahn, Sheila Wray Gregoire, Renee Swope, Crystal Paine, Michele Cushatt, and others, to bring you
101 Simple Ways to Show Your Husband You Love Him that will inspire you to nurture your man and foster a lasting, loving, and fun-filled relationship.
by kathilipp | Feb 1, 2016 | Clutter Free, Uncategorized |
You know you’re a die-hard Kathi Lipp fan when you set the alarm for 4:50.
On a Saturday morning.
As my friend, Amy, and I drove several hours to the Finally Clutter Free Conference, I wondered:
Do I really need to hear this?
After all, I’ve read Clutter Free. (Several times, in fact.) I’ve taken the 2014 Things Challenge. I’ve gone through the Kickstart to Clutter Free eCourse (14 Days, 500 Things, No Mercy) once and am half-way through it again.
But later that morning, I remembered:
Nothing compares to hearing Kathi live and in person!
Here are just a few highlights from the copious notes we took during Kathi’s three amazing Clutter Free messages and Kim Nowlin’s delightful bonus Clutter Free Wardrobe talk:
- “We can ignore our clutter for a while. But one day, it will bite you in the butt!” (Kathi tells it like it is!)
- “When your environment is cluttered, it restricts your brain’s ability to focus. Clutter competes for your attention.” (This was powerful. I could sense a difference in my heartrate and anxiety level just looking at “before” and then the “after” pictures.)
- “Creativity is on the other side of clutter.” (The more clutter I discard, the more creative I discover I am!)
- “Don’t keep stuff — only keep stories.” (POWERFUL decision-making filter!)
- “Get rid of clothes that talk down to you. I have enough negative voices in my head; I don’t need a jacket yelling at me, too!” (I’m feeling rather smug about the two bags of 40+ closet items ready for the Goodwill right now!)
- “If you’re crying in the fitting room, the problem is the clothes, not you!” (This may have had me crying in the front row…!)
- “Release anything that isn’t serving you so it can bless someone else!” (After hearing Kathi’s Nike story, I will never again debate giving away “perfectly usable” things!)
- “The only difference between a project and a crisis is TIME.” (Now we’re gettin’ personal!)
- “When there’s a PLAN, I’m taking care of my future self.” (How cool would it be for my present self to always say, “THANK YOU!!!” to my past self?!?)
If you haven’t attended a Finally Clutter Free Conference yet, find a location near you and get your ticket now!
Can’t find one scheduled near you? Find out how you can bring Kathi and her crew to town!
(Today’s blog post brought to you by Kathi’s co-author, partner-in-crime, and #1 FanGirl, Cheri Gregory.)
by kathilipp | Jan 26, 2016 | Clutter Free, Podcast |
Ideas to Keep You Motivated to Stay Clutter Free
As January is coming to an end, most resolutions start to fall apart because the novelty wears off. We won’t let your motivation to be Clutter Free slip away!
Decluttering isn’t a two week process (that’s just the Kickstart) this is something you have to do for the rest of your life and we have to stay motivated to accomplish our goals so we can be world changers!
Listen as Kathi and Erin discuss Ideas to Keep You Motivated to Stay Clutter Free including discovering the best gift you can give yourself each week. It will give you less stress and help declutter your life.
Don’t forget you can still sign up for the Kickstart to Clutter Free HERE.
See the Free Download to create your Home Mission Statement below.
FREE DOWNLOAD
These are great rules for a family to leave by- from being kind, to dreaming big, print and frame it to inspire your family this year!
Erin MacPherson lives in Austin, Texas with her husband Cameron, her sons Joey and Will and her daughter Kate. She is the author of “The Christian Mama’s Guide Series“, a staff writer for Dun & Bradstreet and a freelancer for publications like Thriving Family Magazine, MOPS MomSense, FamilyLife Magazine, Daily Guideposts and BEMag. She blogs about her life, her kids and her faith at ChristianMamasGuide.com.
by kathilipp | Jan 19, 2016 | Clutter Free, Podcast |
Sometimes the cutest things become our biggest challenge when getting Clutter Free and those would be our not so Clutter Free Kids.
Today we share real life strategies that we can use with our children to not only help us kick clutter our of our homes, but will also give our children the strategies they will need to live a Clutter Free life when they leave our nest.
Don’t forget that it’s not too late to join us for the Kickstart to Clutter Free e-course!
Click HERE and use the code: INSIDER to get the course at half price!
FREE DOWNLOAD
Sometimes the first step to decluttering is actually taking a step. And so to start, I came up with this list of things you can get rid of right now. Today.
Click on the HERE for your free download.
Erin MacPherson lives in Austin, Texas with her husband Cameron, her sons Joey and Will and her daughter Kate. She is the author of “The Christian Mama’s Guide Series“, a staff writer for Dun & Bradstreet and a freelancer for publications like Thriving Family Magazine, MOPS MomSense, FamilyLife Magazine, Daily Guideposts and BEMag. She blogs about her life, her kids and her faith at ChristianMamasGuide.com.
by kathilipp | Jan 12, 2016 | Clutter Free, Podcast |
Kicking off the New Year by kicking out the clutter? Kathi and Erin get Your Questions Answered.
What counts as a thing when counting what is going out?
What do you do when guests leave their clutter at your house?
What about our kids’ clutter?
What do you do when you no longer can use something, but it’s so good that you want to find just the right home for it?
Join us as we take on our clutter.
FREE DOWNLOAD
Sometimes the first step to decluttering is actually taking a step. And so to start, I came up with this list of things you can get rid of right now. Today.
Click on the HERE for your free download.
Erin MacPherson lives in Austin, Texas with her husband Cameron, her sons Joey and Will and her daughter Kate. She is the author of “The Christian Mama’s Guide Series“, a staff writer for Dun & Bradstreet and a freelancer for publications like Thriving Family Magazine, MOPS MomSense, FamilyLife Magazine, Daily Guideposts and BEMag. She blogs about her life, her kids and her faith at ChristianMamasGuide.com.
by kathilipp | Jan 8, 2016 | Blog, Clutter Free |
Too much clutter is a common problem in many families today, and it creates stress and conflict in our family relationships. It is important to remove the clutter from our homes and our lives so we can be freed up to be who God wants us to be.
Today, on Focus on the Family, Kathi encourages everyone to clear out the clutter as a way to start the New Year off right!
If you’re ready to kickstart the year, try Kickstart to Clutter Free, Kathi’s new ecourse!
