What you believe directly correlates with what you do. Sometimes our false beliefs hold us back from living the clutter-free life and being the person God created us to be.
Today we talk about a few of those misconceptions and how we can replace them with the truth.
Clutter Misconception #1
So-and-so gave it to me.
As a twenty-something, I visited my family in my home state. It took two days to drive with two little girls in the back seat. We had a wonderful visit, but as I was packing my car, an aunt insisted that I take two giant stuffed toys — a bunny and crow dressed as a scarecrow.
I said no. She ignored my request, instead buckling them into the seatbelts as if they were passengers. My twenty-something self simply shrugged and drove away. (My forty-something self would…respond differently.) I got quite a few second looks as I drove home two days through three states with a bunny and a crow riding shotgun.
A year later, after the girls were tired of keeping the oversized toys, we put them into our garage sale and sold them to good homes.
Again I made the trip back home to see family. When the topic of the bunny and crow came up with my aunt, I told her I’d sold them. She then had the audacity to scold me for getting rid of them.
And then…I died.
Kidding!
I didn’t die. I survived the awkwardness and (mostly) enjoyed my visit with family.
We’re afraid of other people’s reactions sometimes and that’s why we keep stuff we don’t love or use. But my experience with my aunt’s reaction only took a few minutes as opposed to looking at stuff we neither want nor need indefinitely.
Clutter Misconception #2
We might need it again someday.
I’ll never forget the day I pulled my beautiful rose-shaped candles out of storage. Instead of delicate pink petals and perfect, unburned wicks, I found a melted glob of cloying pink wax all over photo frames and other keepsakes. I’d never had a specific purpose for them, but I thought surely I’d use them someday.
This is the worst reason to keep an item you’re not using right now. If you don’t know for sure whether it will come in handy, wouldn’t it be best for your space (and the item) if it were being used by someone who does need it now?
To be clear, I’m not talking about a treasured, irreplaceable heirloom you have to put in storage because you don’t have room in your living space in this season of life. If you can say yes to “Do I love it?” then keep it. But if you don’t use it, love it, and wouldn’t buy it again, give someone else the pleasure of using it now.
Clutter Misconception #3
I spent money on it, so now I need to keep it even though I don’t use it.
We visited our friends in Oregon City, OR a couple of years ago. Their adult son, his wife, and four children were home on furlough from their mission in Indonesia. They gave us a special gift: nutmeg still in its shell, grown on the island where they were serving. (They looked almost like pecans.)
I kept them in a special bowl on my dresser, where they served as a pretty fall decoration. I came across the perfect kitchen tool one day in the store — a spice grater. How perfect! I would save it all for Christmas and then make my family wonderful holiday drinks with freshly grated nutmeg on top. It would make Christmas even more magical!
Well, Christmas came and went in a flurry of present buying and wrapping, post office trips, grocery store runs and aaaalllll the cooking. We had a great time but I never got around to making special hot drinks or grating my own nutmeg. The little grater sat in a drawer for months and my cat scattered the nutmeg seeds all over the house. (She thinks my dresser is her personal toy store.)
I knew where those paws had been, so there’s no way I was going to consume anything she’d batted around the floor. Every time I looked into the kitchen drawer, I saw the grater taking up space. You might say it grated on me, but that might be getting a little cheesy.
Still, I couldn’t get rid of it. I’d spent good money on it but never used it.
The next Christmas, my brother smoked some ribs for us all to have for Christmas dinner. In the process of making iced tea, I flooded my counter and all the water drained into that drawer. As I was emptying the drawer to dry everything out, my brother made fun of all my obscure kitchen tools, especially the grater, in the way only siblings can do. (Don’t you love siblings? They’re ruthless and some of your favorite people ever all rolled into one.)
That Christmas, I chose to put the grater (and some other tools) into the giveaway bin. Guess what? I haven’t felt guilty for spending money on it since then, because I don’t have anything around to remind me. By giving it to someone who would use it, I got out of the guilt cycle and blessed someone else. (Who knows? I may have enabled the next winner of Top Chef by providing the one tool needed to get to the next level!)
Clutter-Free Truths
Before you get rid of the clutter, you have to get rid of the misconceptions that make you believe you need to keep it.
Kathi’s three questions help us base every decision on the truth:
Do I love it?
Do I use it?
Would I buy it again?
Giveaway Time!*
Speaking of misconceptions, clutter isn’t the only thing we get confused about. That’s why Amanda Haley wrote Mary Magdalene Never Wore Blue Eyeshadow — to help us sort out our misconceptions about the Bible.
Thanks to the generosity of Harvest House Publishers, we have a few of these to give away to our readers!
One Grand Prize Winner will receive one copy of the book, along with some lovely things to provide a cozy reading atmosphere. Curl up with some slippers, tea, a journal, and pens to enjoy this book and dig into truths from the Bible.
Leave a comment below to be entered to win.
What clutter misconceptions are holding you back from a clutter-free life?
*Giveaway for US residents only.
- #655 Finding Grace in Your Imperfect Space: A Conversation with Hilary Bernstein - February 4, 2025
- #653 Say Goodbye to Insomnia: How Decluttering Can Reboot Your Rest - January 21, 2025
- #652 The Clutter Free Lifestyle: 10 Habits That Actually Work - January 14, 2025
Thank you for your blog & podcast. I just found you as I’m starting to lead a group at church. I can’t wait to read more.
I struggle the most with giving things up from people I love, and if I just bought it but haven’t used it.
Just found you! I’m inspired!
Ummm… do I confess that we just brought a crate of stuff home from my parents house that is being sold. Boy do I need this!
Thank you for the breakdown in the why and how! I love your insight!
Finances are extremely tight so if I do need something one day I might not be able to repurchase it. The flip side is if I need it God will supply a way to repurchase it.
I’m sometimes the opposite and get rid of things too quickly! But usually I feel like I need to hold onto something out of guilt or future need!
Thanks for summarizing so simply the big reasons I’ve retained so much clutter over the years. Perfect to keep in mind as I enter a new season.
Congratulations, you are a winner! Please check your email for more details. ~Kathi Lipp Giveaway Team
I struggle letting go of things at times, especially if it is something someone gave me. I have to work on this!
Thank you for the reminder that it’s ok to get rid of something even though it was given to me by someone special. That one is hard for me, especially when it comes to things that were given to me by my parents. But if I don’t love it or use it, there’s really no reason to hold onto it. 🙂
I struggle with realizing that I don’t have to fill up every single space in my home. Thanks for the great read!
I definitely struggle with realizing that just because I think I might use something one day, I don’t have to keep it.
The clutter misconception holding me back from life is that I’m too busy now to declutter and that when I declutter, it has to be the perfect declutter and organization project. Thanks for this great insight!
Congratulations, you are a winner! Please check your email for more details! ~Kathi Lipp Giveaway Team
Emotional attachment to items just because so and so gave it to me, or I remember when my daughter wore this, or this use to be great aunt Sally’s….these are the items that create clutter in my life. Also, not knowing where or how to get rid of items that still have value without throwing them away. Finally, not having a good organized storage system set up. I was just directed to your blog last night and am so excited!
Congratulations, you are a winner! Please check your email for more details. ~Kathi Lipp Giveaway Team
Loved the podcast with Amanda Haley! A great new modern understanding of Gods word!
I come from a clutter family. It didn’t seem like our house was cluttered when we were little, but now that I’ve been out of their house for 20+ years, it has more stuff than ever. I’ve been working on their house for 4 years now. I’m trying to get out from under the misconception of 1. We might need it some day (haven’t used it in 10 years…) and 2. But so and so gave it to me. It’s tough, but I’m making good progress in my own life. Now I need to share this wisdom with my parents. Thanks Kathi!
My biggest clutter misconception is that I’m still the person that bought whatever item is currently clutter. Maybe it wasn’t clutter 10 years ago but I’m at a different stage of life now with different interests and commitments.
My most difficult misconception is that I may use the item again someday. Thank you for reminding me that getting rid of items is rewarding and freeing!
I relate to all three misconceptions, but most of all I struggle with “I might use it some day”. After reading Kathi’s post, I’m reminded that you also lose the guilt of not using an item when you go ahead and get rid of it. I keep trying to convince myself that if I were more organized I could keep everything and know where it all was, but that’s just impossible.
Congratulations, you are a winner! Please check your email for more details. ~Kathi Lipp Giveaway Team
Mine is definitely the money myth, even more so when we are tight on funds. But I need to remember that its costing more to keep it.
Kathy’s three clutter rules outlined in the post above apply to everyone else in my life, especially my husband, and I’m happy to point this out to them but they do not apply to me because I have legitimate excuses why not!
My hardest is I spent money on it so now I need to keep it. If I spend money on it, it’s so hard to say goodbye even if it didn’t work. I’ve been working on having less clutter for the last 3 years but this one still gets me.
Congratulations, you are a winner! Please check your email for more details. ~Kathi Lipp Giveaway Team
This was such a great post. Thanks for sharing truth & encouraging us to seek truth!
Funny and insightful! I really do put out my rose-shaped candles a couple of times and year and for special occasions. They survive because I keep them where they can’t melt! 🙂
The way we view each of those aspects (1-3) depends so much on the season of life and frankly, the season of finances. Right now it’s easy for me to suggest a loved one get rid of some items that I think are excessive because in my case, I wouldn’t suffer too badly to pay to replace it later; whereas for them that might not be an option. I’m learning that for me, and for the sake of my relationships, the key is to combine great Clutter Free principles with a lot of grace – for others and for myself. Still a work in progress…
Marv Magdelene Never Wore Blue Eye Shadow is what brought me here, so i was not expecting these handy decluttering tips. I’m glad I know about this site now!
I have been using your tools to declutter my home. I really struggle with number 3, it’s so hard for me to think of all the time we’ve given up for buying stuff and all the money wasted. But I always think of your son finding those Nike shoes, and I remember finding my first pair of stride rites at my local goodwill with my first son and how I was so excited to have a pair of leather sandals for him to wear to church. We have gone with very littler so it’s hard for me to give up things we worked so hard for. But your story which reminded me of the blessing someone gave me helps me to donate by hopefully blessing someone else.
Wow! That looks like a perfect night in package!!! Adding this book to my “want” list for sure!! Thanks for the great ideas!!
As I’m preparing for my first military move I’m finding things like candles that I’ve never used but cannot/should not pack. It’s just pushing me to use what I can now and making me enjoy my home now before I go! Nothing like reading a good book enhanced by the glow and scent of a good candle 😉
I can certainly relate to the “but I spent $’s” concept.
This sounds like an intriguing book. Absolutely loved this post, by the way!
Definitely food for thought. I love all of your posts. So glad I got to sit in your session at MOMCON ?
For me, it was and is books that I might read someday for the first time or again. After moving several times and them still being in boxes, I finally donated them to the library.
3 gets me all the time, I spent money I need to keep it. But so many things that I’ve spent money on something and just can’t part with it.
#1 and #3 clutter misconceptions hold me back from that clutter free life.
Thanks for the reminder! I know the right thing to do… sometimes I just love everything:)
The most passionate decluttering I have done occurred while in the throws of frustration, moving gobs of unneeded and unwanted things in search of the 1 thing I wanted and needed at the moment. It didn’t take long for me to grab a box and toss rather than move those items. So far, I haven’t regretted any of the tossing. Less searching time means more pampering time!
3 gets me all the time, I spent money I need to keep it. But so many things that I’ve spent money on something and just can’t part with it.
Congratulations, you are a winner! Please check your email for more details. ~Kathi Lipp Giveaway Team
I hate it when I save something I think I’ll use later only to find out it’s been ruined. I know I need to get rid of those things. Thanks for the reminder.
One of my new strategies to help with purging clutter is to focus on how I’m helping my family focus more on the things we truly value and need to have space for.
It is always hard to let go when you spent good “money” on something. I try to frame it like you do, it is now going to bless someone else who needs it.