by kathilipp | Jan 21, 2015 | Clutter Free, Guest Blog |
I’ll Just Put it Here for Now by Alexandra Kuykendall
We have a house with a front door that almost never gets used. Sure we open it to go on the front porch to get the mail, but almost everyone who comes in and out of our house does so by way of the garage and our mud room. The “mud room” is a landing place between our kitchen, laundry room, garage and stairs to our basement. In other words, it’s a vortex of stuff.
And because we are a family of six, we’re talkin’ a lot of stuff. Six people’s worth of backpacks and cleats and sweaters and artwork and leftover lunches, to dump every time we walk in the house.
On top of the regular inflow of clutter, its snow season where we live. Which means for the last month and a half we’ve needed snow boots, hats, gloves, scarves and snow pants for sledding about two times a week. The rest of the days, a single jacket will do because it’s back to Colorado sunshine.
A few days ago, I could barely walk through, not to mention over, all of the MESS that had landed in this spot. Visitors coming in and out of our house were greeted by this “welcome mat” of coats and socks and school papers and lunch boxes strewn everywhere. I needed to do something about this disaster of a space.
I grabbed Kathi Lipp’s newest book, Clutter Free: Quick and easy steps to simplifying your space. This is what I found:
“It’s so easy to just put things somewhere “for now” and then leave them there day after day, week after week, month after month until our house becomes a cluttered mess.”
This landing had become our “for now” spot with all things coming in and out of our home. Kathi asks, “What is causing you to put things down “for now”? Are you feeling too rushed in your everyday life? Is there never a chance to reset?” Ummm….does she have a nannycam positioned in this mudroom of mine? I needed to take the hour required to clear this space of its clutter.
I decided our mud room should hold only immediate needs. The jackets, shoes, backpacks, and gloves we need TODAY as we walk out the door. There shouldn’t be soccer backpacks hanging on hooks because it’s not soccer season. There should be no flip flops in shoe bins when we have snow on the ground. And there should not be four coat options per person when we can only each wear one jacket, one hat, one pair of gloves at a time. All of these things we “put here for now” have overstayed their welcome and need to be tucked away in coat closets and bedroom closets to be brought out in a few days or a few months when we need them.
So I did just that, moved everything back to its designated spot (and in the process redesignated some locations) and gave a bag full of shoes and hats away in the process (tips I also learned from Kathi’s book). With all of the piles cleared out it felt as though I could breathe when I stepped in my house. And when my husband walked in the door he proclaimed, “Praise Jesus!” Well, yes, always. But also thank you Kathi Lipp for a practical nudge to get the clutter out.
Alexandra Kuykendall is a mother of four, ages twelve to three, Alexandra Kuykendall spends her days wiping. Wiping counters, wiping bottoms and wiping tears. Alex lives in Denver with her family where she serves as the Specialty Content Editor for MOPS International (Mothers of Preschoolers). Her first book, The Artist’s Daughter: A Memoir, chronicles her questions of identity from girlhood through motherhood.
Find her at www.AlexandraKuykendall.com.
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by kathilipp | Jan 19, 2015 | Clutter Free, Guest Blog, Uncategorized |
When Facing Your Clutter Feels Too Overwhelming by Cheri Gregory
- “You over-react to everything.”
I’ve heard these accusations all my life. I’ve also been labeled
For four-and-a-half decades, I thought there was something very wrong with me.
That I was defective.
Beyond repair.
Then, I read Quiet: the Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking and learned that I’m not defective, just different.
I’m an HSP: .
HSPs and Clutter
According to “16 Habits of Highly Sensitive People,” an HSP is likely to
- be overwhelmed by strong sensory input. (i.e. visual, auditory, etc.)
- be bothered by intense stimuli, like loud noises or chaotic scenes.
- feel more deeply.
- be more emotionally reactive.
- take longer to make decisions.
- become more upset if she makes a “bad” or “wrong” decision.
- take criticism more personally and experience its effects more strongly.
De-cluttering can trigger every one of these, causing me to over-react, shut down, or both. (Sometimes simultaneously!)
I’ve learned that in order to stay out of the “Overwhelmed Zone” while de-cluttering, I need two things: awareness and an HSP-specific plan.
Awareness
In Clutter Free, Kathi says,
Owning is not bad. But we must understand that there is a price to be paid for everything we own. Owning too much chips away at our freedom.
HSPs can pay a higher-than-average price for owning to much stuff, and the de-cluttering process can be especially stressful.
For years, I felt blind-sided by my own reactions to the de-cluttering process, even though they happened every time I tried. When I started to accept and even predict them, they became far more manageable.
Every time I de-clutter, I have three main reactions:
- The visual chaos becomes over-stimulating. Suddenly.
- Sorting through my stuff evokes emotions. BIG emotions.
- Deciding what to keep and what to toss takes time. Lots of time.
An HSP-Specific Plan
When I de-clutter, I give myself these permissions and reminders:
- DO start small. Set a timer and do what you can in a short time span. Then take a break.
Don’t force yourself to keep going–that break is vital. (And whatever you do, don’t haul everything out of a closet and spread it out all over the room to “force” yourself to deal with it all!)
- DO acknowledge your feelings. De-cluttering is a loss process. Every item has a story; much of your stuff holds memories. Honor your heart even as you let go.
Don’t get stuck in guilt or shame. You don’t have to keep gifts to “prove” that you love the giver. You don’t have to hang on to old purchases to “punish” yourself for spending so much money.
- DO develop criteria ahead of time. This prevents analysis paralysis. For example, deciding “If I haven’t worn it in ___ months, out it goes!” puts you in an objective frame of mind.
Don’t force yourself to make big decisions on the spot. It’s okay to say, “I’m not ready” about an area or an item. It’s okay to move on for now and come back.
Finding What Works for You
Every HSP is unique. Make your own lists so you can become aware of what happens for you…and what works for you.
Be sure to check back next Monday, when several special guests will share their HSP Clutter Free stories and tips!
Wonder if you, too, might be an HSP? Subscribe to Cheri’s blog and receive your FREE “HSP–Who, Me?” PDF.
Are you ready to be Clutter Free? Start the 21-Day Clutter Free challenge! Sign up now!
by kathilipp | Jan 15, 2015 | Clutter Free, Guest Blog |
A year ago we moved into a wonderful home after living in a tiny apartment for three and a half years. I had visions of making this place a home, but we ended up dumping boxes on the floor and leaving them there. When people came to visit, I picked up all the stuff around the common living areas, stuffed it into grocery bags, and hid the bags next to the boxes in my master bedroom making sure to keep the door closed. 
It isn’t fun to sleep surrounded by chaos, but any time I would set out to clean things up, I was so overwhelmed not knowing where to start or what to do with all of the things in the piles on the floor. I’d end up literally feeling exhausted and take a nap. The chaos was like kryptonite defeating my best plans.
Reading Kathi Lipp’s Clutter Free gave me the information I needed to not only deal with the physical aspect of the chaos but also understand the mental and spiritual aspects of WHY I make the choice to hold on to things or continue to believe that purchasing more stuff will make me happy. The first part of the book had such great insight that explained exactly what is flawed with my thinking about stuff. 
It’s tempting to skip this information and just get to the “how to” part of the book, but understanding the WHY was the permanent change in the way I think about everything in my house that I needed. Even though I focused on decluttering my master bedroom first, I found myself questioning the value of items I came across in every room and closet throughout the house. 
Now, I can’t help but declutter as I go about my daily routine and come across items asking myself, “Do I currently use it? Do I really love it? Would I buy it again?” Heck, I even watched my husband throw away a piece of equipment when he finally admitted that it wasn’t worth keeping around because when he did try to use it, it only worked half of the time.
I spend my time blogging and speaking to women about identifying their priorities and arranging their lives to reflect those priorities. Whether it’s Christmas, your New Year’s goals, or how you want to raise your children, when you identify what means the most to you, you realize what DOESN’T and you can get rid of those things. Kathi hit it on the head when she wrote:
At some point, we need to end some things so we can hold on to the things that are most important to us. And when we define the things that are truly important to us, we can start recognizing the things that are not important to us and eliminate those things from our life.
Once I got that concept regarding my stuff, the chaos no longer had control over me. I had the power to look at sections of my house and attack them with the game plan Kathi explains so simply.
This book isn’t about micromanaging the possessions we have, it’s about not letting the emotional aspect of the possessions run our lives. Because of understanding the “why” and learning the “how to” that is in Clutter Free, I know what to keep and what to give away. It’s freeing and now when I go to bed, instead of being surrounded by boxes, bags, and stress, I’m surrounded by peace, comfort, and beauty.
You can find out more about Luna at her website!
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by kathilipp | Jan 14, 2015 | Clutter Free, Guest Blog |
Our post today contains Mary Lou Caskey’s testimonial about Clutter Free.
“Kathi, thank you so much for your book, Clutter Free: Quick and Easy Steps to Simplifying Your Space.
You shine in so many areas, including encouraging others with God’s Grace, making changes from the inside-out and making things FUN!
I appreciate how the book is written from someone who understands the struggle! The book is filled with GOLDEN NUGGETS that honestly relate to so many areas of life, not just clutter!
Your teaching and tips resonate with me and have made a difference in my life. For example, in just one 15 minute project alone, I received peace, clarity, freedom, hope and so much more.
I had stacks of “ideas” that were costing me time and mental energy to go through each time I needed to find an idea! You will see from the photos that I now have a “clean slate” to work with. Thank you!”
Here is Mary Lou’s before picture of her desk:
Here is picture of Mary Lou’s desk after she spent a little bit of time decluttering:
If you want to read more about Mary Lou’s experience with Clutter Free, visit her blog!
Mary Lou Caskey trains Christian coaches and communicators to influence hearts through the power of story. If you want to become a transformative story-teller, click here to connect with Mary Lou and get her free quiz, “Is It the Best Time to Share a Personal Story?”
Are you ready to be Clutter Free? Start the 21-Day Clutter Free challenge! Sign up now!
by kathilipp | Jan 12, 2015 | Clutter Free, Guest Blog, Me |
I hate her.
As I stare at the boxes of belongings going to the Goodwill, I hate the woman who bought all this stuff in the first place.
My past self.
What were you thinking?!? I demand.
This, of course, is the heart of the problem.
I wasn’t thinking when I bought all this stuff.
I was longing.
Longing to be.
I felt an endless ache for be-longing.
So I bought easily into the lie: You can buy in order to become!
Through the years, I’ve purchased dozens (perhaps hundreds!) of versions of myself.
My boxes of belongings are like the Barbie isle at Toys R Us:
The piles of card stock, drawers of punches, and boxes of photo albums still in shrinkwrap?
Scrapping Cheri.
The mandoline with fifteen attachments, the ice cream cookie sandwich maker, and that 20-year-old stack of brand-new cookbooks?
Cooking Cheri.
Yoga mat, Denise Austin DVDs, and NIB cross-training shoes?
Fit-n-Fabulous Cheri.
You won’t find evidence of Awful Evil Cheri in any of these boxes.
No, the problem is far more subtle.
The problem is that I’ve bought so many versions of myself, I haven’t been able to find my self.
My one self.
The woman God created me to be.
I’ve tried on so many different lives that I’ve failed to live my own.
Trapped by Belongings
I tried to satisfy my be-longings with belongings.
But my excess belongings ended up owning me.
My excess belongings have taken
My excess belongings have stolen everything I need to discover who I truly am.
Free to Be
But here’s the good news:
As I surrender excess external belongings, internal transformation is occurring.
I’m noticing two things in particular:
1) I’m admitting who I am not.
I’m not a scrapper or gourmet cook or athlete.
Or any of the other versions of me represented by the stuff in my boxes of belongings.
I didn’t really long to be any of them
My longing went far deeper.
I longed to belong.
2) I’m finding space to be me.
I’m finding where I belong.
And to Whom I belong.
“Quite simply, every piece of clutter I give away gets me closer to the life I’m designed to live. One of peace. One of freedom.” (Pg. 35)
The more clutter you release, the better you can hear God’s call on your heart.
You’ll find that he’s not a cruel circus master, demanding that you live dozens (or hundreds!) of lives.
He’s a loving, rescuing shepherd.
Who will lead you into a spacious place.
Where you belong. With Him.
And where you can live your one life well.
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