Today, Kathi will be on Focus on the Family sharing about her new book, Get Yourself Organized for Christmas and about the Countdown to Christmas that starts November 17th. You don’t want to miss this great interview where Kathi encourages you to get ready for the best Christmas you’ll ever have.
My friend Sarah (not her real name,) is out there. “There” being the dating world. And after hearing about her adventures out there, it makes me doubly grateful for my husband Roger.
Because while Roger is one of the good guys, there are a whole lot of bad guys.
A whole lot.
Like the guys who told her, “Oh, I thought maybe you’d lose some weight since you took your profile picture.”
A whole lot of bad guys…
But as she was telling me some of the worst points about the guys she and her friends have dated, it started to feel oh so familiar.
“He’s never around when I need him.”
“He’s lazy. He just sits around. I never get to do what I want to do.”
Since writing my book Clutter Free, I’ve heard every complaint about clutter, but for the first time, I started to see the correlation between the things that women say about bad relationships and the clutter that is ruining their lives.
“I can never find anything when I need it.”
“I would be able to get so much more accomplished if I didn’t have to deal with so much clutter.”
And when we start to see our clutter in the light of a bad relationship – the need to break up with it becomes oh, so much clearer.
1. Clutter, wants to make sure you know that you’re not good enough for anything better.
That boyfriend discouraged you from going for your degree or getting a better job. “You don’t have enough time for me – what makes you think you’ll have time for that.” He kept you from dreaming about the better life you could have and wanted you to settle. Clutter does the same thing. It convinces you – YOU! – you bright, intelligent, passionate woman, that you can’t handle your life and that you should just settle.
2. Just like a bad boyfriend, your clutter is constantly jealous.
Clutter doesn’t want you going out – it wants you stuck at home, tending to it. Clutter is lazy, and wants you to do all the work.
3. Clutter is a liar.
Clutter calls you lazy even though your coworkers always tell you what a hard worker you are. Clutter tells you that you will never change. Clutter says you’re not creative, not smart, not passionate. Clutter lies to you every chance it gets.
4. Your friends and family hate it.
My mom hated my first boyfriend. Hated him. I spent less time with my family and my school friends, and started to change my personality to accommodate him. Clutter makes the same demands – isolating you and making you bend to its will.
Here are a couple places to start:
I would love to hear your story of how you’ve broken up with some of your clutter- give us specifics – we need some hope from those of you who are living free!
Break up with Clutter in just 14 days! Get Kathi’s Kickstart to Clutter Free eCourse today and kick that clutter to the curb sister!
It was the year that I decided that I was going to be absolutely intentional about keeping it a sacred Christmas. I had my Bible readings focused on the Christ story, I bought an Advent devotional, and I carefully selected a play list that was filled with songs that kept my heart focused on our Savior.
I was doing great.
Until I realized I was all out of Scotch tape.
The night before our Bible Study Christmas ornament exchange.
And that’s when I lost my Jesus.
You are going to get a lot of great advice about keeping your heart in the right place when it comes to preparing for Christmas. Which is great.
But I’ve come to find if I also keep my head in the right space, and make some smart decisions as early as possible, that goes a long way to giving my heart some protection. So here are a few practical things to think through now before Christmas hits you in the face.
The earlier you make plans, the easier it is to see potential problems and family conflicts. (This is especially important with in-laws and step-families.)
Set up and send out the dates and times of when you will be celebrating early so everyone has the information. You may even consider sending a “Save the Date” if you have a larger family (or a forgetful family.)
There are no awards for people who pull off a holiday with no help (only sore feet and bitter attitudes.) If you are the one who is hosting the holiday, let others help (and if you are shy on offers, feel free to ask!) Here are a couple of ways to make it a family – and friends – affair.
Use www.signupgenius.com to create a list of all the dishes you need that others can bring. Be specific. (You don’t want to say “Salad” and have three people bring chicken salad.) Think of it this way – when people choose what they can bring, they will bring their “specialty”. Having a table of everyone’s best foods is a GREAT way have the best meal of the year.
For years, I would have people show up at my house for a holiday, and the first question they would ask is “How can I help?” The problem? All the things that could have been done with little prep were already done.
Now, I think backwards.
When I create the holiday to do list, I purposely think of tasks that guests who are just showing up can do. As I’m listing all the things that need to get accomplished, I put the word “Help” next to anything that is easy for someone else to do. Here are some examples:
Talk to your family early about limits. Do you want to put a limit on the number of gifts? The amount of the gifts? Do a gift exchange? Maybe not exchanging at all?
We have a lot of young adults in the family and they can’t all afford gifts for everyone, so we use www.elfster.com (a virtual way of choosing names from a hat), and keep it affordable for everyone.
My anxiety level goes up several notches whenever I need to go to the mall between October 15th and December 31st. I know that I’ll probably have to make one trip there (holding my breath until I can get away from the crowds –I don’t like crowds..) but for everything else, I’ve found ways around it.
Looking for encouragement to help you recover from that pesky problem of perfectionism? Today’s featured book is Get Yourself Organized for Christmas. You can enter to win a signed copy by leaving a comment directly on Kathi’s blog. PLUS, you’ll also be entered into the grand prize drawing for the Wrapped In Grace gift package: signed copies of all five of our books, a $100 Visa gift card, and a bunch of other fun goodies. All winners will be announced Saturday, October 24th at http://www.WrappedInGrace.info.
Kathi Lipp is a national speaker and the author of fifteen books including Clutter Free, Hot Mama:12 Secrets to a Sizzling Hot Marriage, The Get Yourself Organized Project, The Husband Project and The Cure for the Perfect Life. She is a frequent guest on radio and TV and has been named Focus on the Family radio’s “Best of Broadcast”. She is the host of the popular podcast You’ve Got This with Kathi Lipp.
She and her husband Roger are the parents of young adults in San Jose, CA. Kathi speaks at conference across the country.
Either you are reading this because you, yourself still need some help, or you have a young (hopefully, young and not a 40 year old) adult living at home who needs a little help. Either way, it’s time we have a heart to heart conversation. The matter at hand here is usually disorganization and clutter.
To get to the root of the problem often takes examining what has gotten you here in the first place. Maybe it’s life change, or maybe it’s simply not having the energy to deal with ‘life’ and procrastination has become your friend. Whatever the case, it’s time to get busy. But don’t worry, this isn’t hard stuff to do, it just requires reflecting.
What has happened to make this procrastination take control? What issues are not being addressed? What pain is possibly trying to be avoided? On the flip side… what could you do with more space, more time, and more energy? How would you feel if you could be given those things? Would you feel free? Would you feel less stressed?
Let’s think of some of the physical and tangible things holding you back like some luggage you are taking on a trip. What could be causing you to feel this way? Is it possibly stuff… clutter… excess? Is it possibly not having enough hours in the day?
Part of the problem we find ourselves in is: overwhelm. That is a nasty bugger and it can paralyze you. Don’t let your thoughts, worries and what could possibly happen, stop you from taking one step. You are too good for that! You deserve more!! Just start. That is what matters!
RELATED RESOURCES
Want even more ways to get rid of the clutter and start living the life you were designed to live? Get Kathi’s book Clutter Free Quick and Easy Steps to Simplify Your Space!
What are your best decluttering tips for before baby? Tell us in the comments below and we will randomly pick one commenter to receive “21 Ways to Connect with Your Kids” by Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory.
Do you want more great information to make your family the best it can be? Subscribe to Paula’s blog and get weekly posts and encouragement to help you on your parenting journey. http://phemomenallife.com/
Paula Tobey is founder of PheMOMenal Life Ministries a community for women to go get encouraged and equipped to be the best mom’s they can be to their children by living a healthy balanced life and by becoming all that God created them to be.
When was the last time you had a conversation (I say that word with a chuckle because it may feel more like a daily lecture) with your child about them remembering to pick up after themselves? I bet it was not that long ago. I bet just this morning you had to remind your fourth grader to put her homework folder in her back pack instead of leaving it on the counter. Well I can tell you, there is really only one way to fix that problem and as simple as it is, it is probably the number one thing that ALL people struggle with. It is establishing good habits and routines.
Routines rock, really they are so awesome! Ha, I know you are thinking I’m nutty, but hear me out- routines are the brain’s way of feeling safe, at the same time functioning on auto-pilot. Routines mean the brain does not need to worry (the fight or flight response) because predictability is peaceful. Children especially need routines and the more fine-tuned we have our routines, the better the outcome for the child!
Here are some ways you can build in routines with your kids, that makes getting ready for school much easier.
[Tweet “Parents Guide to Decluttering: Stage Three – School Age #clutterfree”]
I make this a routine every afternoon when the kids come home from school. You know, when they come in, throw their backpacks and shoes by the door, sprint for the pantry for an afterschool snack, and you are there going through the sea of papers that just came in. That is a perfect time to start your afternoon routine of decluttering. Go through the mail, go through all papers, fliers, reminders, etc. that come home in the folders right then. Next, have the kids put the supplies out they will need for homework, and have them get busy. Then, when they are finished, their job is to return all homework to the backpacks and get that part ready for tomorrow.
Declutter the pantry so the kids can help make their own lunches. I started my girls making their own lunches right away. I wanted them to eat what I was preparing and knew if they helped prepare it, they were far more likely to eat it. I then needed to declutter the pantry of the enticing junk that I did not want them packing in their lunches like the chocolate, candy, packaged cakes and cookies. This is good in that you too will snack less often if it is just not there! Put the items they need to make their own lunches at their level so getting the good food is right within reach. Place the items like chips that you want to limit, at the top of the pantry.
Declutter the closets with school approved clothes. Most schools these days have guidelines of what can and can’t be worn (if not it’s a uniform). My girls’ school has rules about straps on tops and dresses, lengths of shorts, no holes, etc. When you do it with your kids, it goes faster and you can show them ways to group their clothes that make it easier for getting ready in the morning. When the closet contains only (or almost only) the clothes that can be worn at school, it prevents any problems that could arise.
By involving your kids in the decluttering process, it will help make them more responsible with their things and have an easier time transitioning into adulthood if they have these routines down pat.
RELATED RESOURCES
Want even more ways to get rid of the clutter and start living the life you were designed to live? Get Kathi’s book Clutter Free Quick and Easy Steps to Simplify Your Space!
What are your best decluttering tips for before baby? Tell us in the comments below and we will randomly pick one commenter to receive “21 Ways to Connect with Your Kids” by Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory.
Do you want more great information to make your family the best it can be? Subscribe to Paula’s blog and get weekly posts and encouragement to help you on your parenting journey. http://phemomenallife.com/
Paula Tobey is founder of PheMOMenal Life Ministries a community for women to go get encouraged and equipped to be the best mom’s they can be to their children by living a healthy balanced life and by becoming all that God created them to be.
A Series by Paula TobeyWhen was the last time you had an urge to clean out all of your closets and you were not pregnant? There is something about ‘nesting time’ that I believe we just need to take advantage of because, let’s face it, when you have them crawling all around under foot, you don’t have the urge whatsoever to declutter your closets, so…. Let’s go! It’s time…
[Tweet “Parents Guide to #Decluttering: Stage One – Before the Baby #pregnancy”]
In the kitchen-
You will want to have enough space to have bottles, or cereal bowls, some baby food jars and teething crackers. (Those items take up the most space so I won’t list everything you could put here). So if you are currently lacking one shelf’s worth of space, it’s time to decide what needs to go. What have you not used in the last year? Is it that food dehydrator you got from Aunt Mary or is it a set of dishes that are so fancy you won’t even use them on Christmas? Whatever the item is, determine this – Do I Love it or Do I Let it Go? Really you have to love it. If you love it, it is worth keeping. It makes your life easier, faster or its just soooo pretty! J If you don’t… it’s time to part ways and BLESS another mom! You basically want enough room to get you through six-nine months’ worth of changes because, truth be told, you do not want to do this over and over!
In the laundry room–
You will be spending quite a bit of time here. For some reason the littler the person, the more laundry they create! LUCKILY their stuff is so small and you can fit more in! It’s most important to have a laundry room stocked with only what you need. It should not be a store-all closet. You, your belly and the hamper need to be able to fit in there and it can be a huge challenge if your laundry room looks like a bomb went off! If it’s time to clear off “Mount Washaton” then do so, so you have a clear surface to put down that darn basket! One basic principle to live by when in the laundry room is this: Keep
In the Linen closet-
Keep it Simple Silly! Seriously, just keep the basics, find other places or throw away the objects that don’t need to be in there! In the Linen closet or baby closet, make sure that you have sheets, towels and bedding in a very convenient place because you will be in here all of the time! It’s mind boggling to me how fast diaper changing pads and spit up cloths are needed so often, but they are. Declutter your linen closet to ONLY the sheets and towels you have to have! For real. You don’t want to do more laundry than you need to.
When living by the love it or let it go philosophy you will create a much happier home environment for your whole family. Clutter equals stress and with a new baby and little sleep, who needs that in the equation?! Not you! Keep that Elsa song playing in your head and declutter your way to a (slightly) more peaceful home!
RELATED RESOURCES
Want even more ways to get rid of the clutter and start living the life you were designed to live? Get Kathi’s book Clutter Free Quick and Easy Steps to Simplify Your Space!
What are your best decluttering tips for before baby? Tell us in the comments below and we will randomly pick one commenter to receive “21 Ways to Connect with Your Kids” by Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory.
Do you want more great information to make your family the best it can be? Subscribe to Paula’s blog and get weekly posts and encouragement to help you on your parenting journey. http://phemomenallife.com/
Paula Tobey is founder of PheMOMenal Life Ministries a community for women to go get encouraged and equipped to be the best mom’s they can be to their children by living a healthy balanced life and by becoming all that God created them to be.
