by kathilipp | Mar 25, 2015 | Blog |
7 Specific Prayers to Make Your Marriage Great
- “Make me a blessing to my spouse in my actions and words.” (James 1:22)
- “Help me pull back from my routine to focus on what is important.” Romans 12:2
- “Let me respect him in all that I say and do.” (Ephesians 5:33)
- “Teach me not to rely on my own strength but to always rely on you.” (Proverbs 3:5)
- “Help me to know and be known by my spouse.” (1 Peter 4:8)
- “I want to be open, honest, and kind as we talk about important areas of our relationship.” (Ephesians 4:2-3)
- “Help me not to forget that you are writing our romance every day.” (Jeremiah 29:11)
Happy Habits for Every Couple available at Amazon and Barnes & Noble!
by kathilipp | Mar 20, 2015 | Blog |
The Day I Quit Motherhood by Jenny Lee Sulpizio
I quit!
Before I knew it, these two words had flown from my mouth and the reason was simple: it had been one of those mornings. You know the kind. The type of morning where the kids overslept, fights over the bathroom ensued, and the packing of lunches had yet to take place. It was the kind of morning where the dog had peed (all over), where the toilet clogged, and my attempts at breakfast had indeed, gone up in flames.
And it wasn’t even 7:30 yet.
So I quit. I gave up. I shouted to the whole house: to the kids, the dog, and anything within earshot, that I was done. In retirement. On sabbatical. Officially F-I-N-I-S-H-E-D with motherhood.
And it felt good (for a minute). Freeing even. That is until I saw my kids. The look upon their faces let me know how wrong I’d been…and how hurtful my little public act of defiance really was. Worse of all? This Christian mama wasn’t showing them Jesus. Not one bit. I wasn’t emoting the kind of unconditional love I consistently receive (like, on a daily basis). Rather, my frustration—my weariness—was taking over.
Isn’t this what happens so much of the time though? You and me? Sometimes we don’t always exude the love of Christ. Not to our kids, our spouses, our loved ones or our friends. I struggle with that…with my imperfections…with knowing that due to my actions, the people I love the most don’t always see Jesus in (and through) me. That I am in fact, human…flawed.
But you know what, friend? Motherhood is hard. However, Jesus is there for us in the middle of our trials. He’s there for it all and through it all.
So on those days where life takes over, where tempers flare, and kids are unruly, instead of giving up or breaking down, do one (or all) of the following:
- Pray: Open that Bible. Read what God has to say. A little bit of quiet time goes a long way on those difficult days and in those hard moments. Ask for strength…for help.
- Give Grace: You’re not perfect. No one is. Give yourself some grace during those times when nothing seems to be going right. Jesus already has.
- Surrender. The journey of motherhood isn’t easy but our greatest blessings often come with difficult challenges. Friend, your best is all anyone can ask for. Surrender the frustration(s). Breathe. Rest. Give it to God.
After many failed attempts at following God’s cues, Jenny Lee Sulpizio has but one goal in mind these days: encouraging women to set their sights on God, and away from the worldly mayhem distracting them. As a Christian mom, wife, author, and contributing blogger to numerous online sites, Jenny looks to inspire her readers to a state of action and a place of peace.
She resides in Arizona with her husband and three children. Connect with Jenny online at www.jennyleesulpizio.com where you’ll find her blog, Grace for the Journey.
Jenny is giving away two copies of her book For the Love of God: A Woman’s Guide to Finding Faith and Getting Grace.
Please leave a comment below answering this question for a chance to win:
Moms, has there ever been a day–a moment–where you wanted to call it quits?
by kathilipp | Mar 18, 2015 | Blog |
10 Ways to Stay Miserable Today…
“I wonder if I can take you out to coffee and pick your brain about writing.”
I get this request at least once a week. (Now I’m thinking if I saved them all up, I could get coffee for free for a month… Picture me twirling the end of my villain mustache with one hand and holding a venti latte with the other.)
I normally turn these requests down. Everything you need to know about writing a book can be found online. Then you need to join a writers group and then go to a conference. I don’t know any other shortcuts. Really. But this was a sister of a dear friend, so of course I said yes.
“I’m writing a book, and I’m just so frustrated with the publishing industry.”
And as she told me all the problems she was having with the book, I asked questions and suggested solutions:
“Why not hire an editor to go over your manuscript?” I asked.
“It’s not ready for anyone else to see!” She shot back.
“You’ve been working on this book for four years. Maybe it’s time to set it aside for a month. Go play with your kids! Get away for a day to Monterey with your husband! Do some normal life!”
“I can’t. Not until this book is sold.”
This woman was not stuck in circumstances. She was stuck in a prison of her own thoughts.
Over the past several weeks, I’ve run into some pretty miserable people. They can’t change their lives, their families are not doing what they want. They keep trying harder and harder, but nothing ever gets better.
At first, I feel sympathy. I get it. It’s so hard to be stuck in a situations that you don’t have a lot of control over. A job loss, a kid crisis, a relationship issue – these are all scary thing that can shut us down for a time.
But circumstances eventually change. Where most of us are stuck is in our own dangerous, limited thinking.
[Tweet “Circumstances eventually change. Most of us are stuck is in our own dangerous, limited thinking.”]
I like to remind myself of the bullies that Cheri Gregory and I talk about in The Cure for the Perfect Life – 12 Ways to Stop Trying Harder and Start Living Braver. When I catch myself saying one of these bad thoughts, I try to capture it as soon as possible and replace it with truth.
Here are a few truths to replace the lies:
When You Tell Yourself…
- “If I want something done right, I’m gonna have to do it myself.”
Replace it with… “It is not all up to me. I can trust other people with their jobs, and I’ll do the best to my ability.”
- “If I can’t do it right, I won’t do it at all.”
Replace it with… “Perfect is for people who never get anything done. I’d rather do it 90% right than not at all.”
- “I don’t do angry.”
Replace it with… “It’s okay to get angry when things upset me or when some kind of injustice has been done. I can be angry and not act wrongly on that anger. Expressing my anger in a calm manner can help me not to become too stressed.”
- “No fun until my work is done.”
Replace it with… “It’s okay to take breaks when I’m working. Sometimes I need a break to clear my mind and refresh myself. Then the job will be done even better when I get back to it.”
- “I’ll rest when I am dead.”
Replace it with… “If I don’t get proper rest, I might be dead sooner than I think. I can’t accomplish everything I want to in one day, and I certainly can’t accomplish it without rest.”
- “I am what I do.”
Replace it with… “I am not defined by my career and areas of service. I am a person with emotions and thoughts and desires, and it’s okay to be me.”
- “I can’t throw it away; I might need it someday.”
Replace it with… “It’s okay to let go of things that I’m not using, especially if they are taking up valuable space in my home. It’s okay to get rid of relationships that aren’t beneficial to me because I am worth more than that and something better will come along.”
- “I work better under pressure.”
Replace it with… “I can work better when I start a project early and give myself plenty of time to work out the kinks and get it right.”
- “I got myself into this mess, so I have to get myself out.”
Replace it with… “It’s okay to admit that I need help. I am not Superwoman, and I don’t have to know the answers to everything. I will take a deep breath and reach out to someone who can help.”
- “No is a dirty word.”
Replace it with… “It’s okay to say no. I can’t do everything. Healthy boundaries will make me a healthier person.”
Which of these lies do you struggle with the most?
Want more tools for replacing faulty thinking with truth?
The Cure for the Perfect Life
by kathilipp | Feb 16, 2015 | Blog |
The first-ever West Coast Christian Writers Conference starts Friday in Fremont, California, where I am the keynote speaker!
Whether you’re writing fiction or non-fiction, the place where your experience intersects with fearless storytelling is where you and the reader finally connect. Join me on an inspirational journey to fearlessly put the writer’s heart on the reader’s page.
Walk-in registrants are welcome. The walk-in fee is $149, and you can either bring your own (Saturday) lunch or grab a bite at a nearby restaurant.
For more information: http://westcoastchristianwriters.com ?#?WCCWriters
by kathilipp | Jan 10, 2013 | Blog, Proverbs 31 OBS, Relationships, The Husband Project |
UPDATED 2016: We know it is not Valentine’s Day, but a spicy marriage isn’t just for the holiday. Create a summer lovin’ kit for the long summer nights to celebrate you and your man! Surprise your husband with a love kit and make it a summer to remember.
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I know that Valentines is over a month away, but I like to imagine that I’m a planner and not going to try to pull everything together the night before. So, if you’re interested in adding a dash of spice to your marriage this Valentine’s Day (and beyond) here is a project you can have as much fun putting together as you will have using. (OK, hopefully you’ll have a little more fun using it. But I digress …)
The Container
Find a decorated box, fabric bag, or any cute container that’s about the size of a shoe box. To do this on a budget, you can use a shoe box, but wrap it “soap opera” style. (Where you wrap the lid and the box separately with wrapping paper so it can stay pretty and be used over and over again.)
What to Fill it With
This is a list of items that can go into the box. Pick and choose those things you and your husband will love. Be playful! Have fun with packing it (and opening it)!
- Candles
- Candy hearts
- Pieces of cute paper with Notes of “I Love You Because…” ***
- Lotion
- Chocolates
- Sparkling cider
- Mixed CD of Great Love Songs
And if you wanted to make sure that your husband’s Valentines wish is fulfilled, (and you have someway for the kids to be occupied,) here are a couple more suggestions of some items to add:
- Sexy briefs (his or hers or both)
- Massage oil
- A rubber ducky
A couple of thoughts:
- You could do a much simpler, stripped down version for a MOPS craft project.
- I’m a big believer in not cheaping out on things like lotion. I don’t want to use anything from Target’s dollar bin on my skin. Get something you will use all year long.
- Same thing for chocolates. If you’re going to spend the calories, get something you love.
- Make sure you put a few things in there that make you feel great – a favorite lip gloss, a candle that you love. This is a basket for both of you.
*** The notes in the mailbox are all reasons I love my hubby. Here is my list. Feel free to totally plagiarize any of these for your own purposes.
- You make sure that my Tivo shows are never interrupted by Star Trek reruns
- You love my mom
- You are smart. And smart is sexy.
- You are a great father.
- You let me keep the kitten we found. And you change the litter box.
- You tell me I’m beautiful even when I have plenty of evidence to the contrary.
- You fix my printer. Every.single.time.
- You never let me pump my own gas.
- You are the best barbecuer I’ve ever experienced.
- You love me on my bad days.
And thanks to Fawn over at The Happy Wives Club for inviting me to link up today. Love her stuff. Check her out:
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We are so excited to team up with Proverbs 31 Ministries as they feature our very own The Husband Project for their online Bible study, June 20-July 22. Be Sure to sign up for the online Bible study HERE!
